Sporting Woods

Luke Gold, Tim Stanton and Michael Vilkins
  • 5.0 (1)
  • Cricket
  • Weekly

SPORTS! From all over the world. SPORTS!! Mostly Australia focused. SPORTS!!! Now showing: Simulated Online Cricket (SOC) - a fake T20 league played on a cricket video game and called like it's the real thing. New SOC episodes every Monday and Thursday. Starring Luke Gold, Tim Stanton and Michael Vilkins.

  1. 17h ago

    SOC S4E9 - Owner Vs Owner

    Tim and Luke have called plenty of matches together. This is the first time they've been on opposite sides of one they can actually remember. Welcome to Simulated Online Cricket - a fake T20 league played on a cricket video game and called like it's the real thing. Regular Sporting Woods listeners: this is the cricket one. Pool B round two, and both hosts' teams lost their openers. Tim's El Tigre Chinos - grand finalists in every SOC season so far - take on Luke's Mad Kents at the Imagine Brewing Superdome. Winner survives, loser is out. Nobody in the booth is even pretending to be neutral. In this episode: - Poetry Corner returns at halftime "by popular demand", with two brand new couplets. "It's Poetry Corner, not Poetry Square." Tim responds with an acrostic. - Possibly the first maiden over in SOC history - Sheldon Cottrell finally gets off the drinks cart. Remember the name. - The Imagine Brewing Superdome has kegs and TVs in the bathrooms, so you never have to leave, plus a wind that comes straight off "the Chill Hill" - Umpire Joe Burrow is always on. Joe says no. - So where is Brock the Sock now? The boys have an update. - If it's not Pucker Pies, it's not going in my mouth. The sponsor reads may be getting lazy. Listening, not watching? Keep an eye on Michael's executive suite camera in the very last moments of the video version. Next up: Luke's Mad Kents head to their spiritual home, St Lawrence's Ground - rebuilt after it burned down a few seasons ago. Nothing was ever proven. New SOC episodes every Monday and Thursday. Hit follow so you don't miss one, and leave a rating - it genuinely helps new people find us. How did you find the show, and where are you listening from? Tell us in the comments, or write in to sportingwoodspodcast@gmail.com. We're trying to work out who's out there. Chapters: 0:00 Cold open: splashback and a crisp 0:43 Commentator vs commentator 1:47 Winner survives, loser's out 3:00 Jerseys and lineups 5:46 Lawn striping and umpires 6:56 The Imagine Brewing Superdome: kegs in the bathrooms 8:47 The toss and the Tigres' innings 10:41 Joe says no 21:21 First simulation, brought to you by Pucker Pies 35:07 Halftime: Poetry Corner returns 36:30 The Mad Kents' chase 48:03 Second simulation, brought to you by Chubb Security 52:22 Post-match 54:00 Net run rate time: is there a pathway? 55:34 Next week: St Lawrence Ground Watch this episode on YouTube: https://youtu.be/_yn43T7Dguc Music: [Sports FM] by Shane Ivers - https://silvermansound.com

    SOC S4E9 - Owner Vs Owner

  2. 3d ago

    SOC S4E8 - One Run-Out Changes Absolutely Everything

    One late run-out turns the whole chase on its head at Skatt Bros Stadium. Welcome to Simulated Online Cricket - a fake T20 league played on a cricket video game and called like it's the real thing. Regular Sporting Woods listeners: this is the cricket one. Pool B round two: win and you're in. The Hooroo Pubudus host the Wristy Strokers at Skatt Bros Stadium for the first time - a breezy ground in the tropics, a very biased home crowd, and the well-priced family SUVs replaced by a well-priced family toilet. With a bidet. It all comes down to one of the all-time great stitch-ups. In this episode: - Simulated Online Cricket is hijacked by Brock the Sock - furious about being left off the Season 4 run sheet, and he's taking Luke's mustache with him - Michael Eats The Sandwich returns at halftime, now a "perennial favourite". Smooth peanut butter and jelly. The booth is disgusted it isn't crunchy, and the players refuse to wait around for it. - Luke's university lecturer's Vegemite and banana sandwich: "the sweet and sour of Australian cuisine" - Umpire Willy Wontie is enormous. Possibly on loan from the NBA. - The Big Corn takes the ball, then hands out free burritos and takes selfies in the outfield - Michael has a new like-and-subscribe line, and it involves chest hair - Simulations brought to you by the NRL SuperCoach Talk Podcast and Doritos Listening, not watching? Mid-match, the executive suite feed freezes and is taken over by Brock the Sock - a sock puppet with a spicy sriracha persona, his own Instagram and a Patreon. Michael returns a few minutes later in a different outfit, claiming he was in the bathroom. Draw your own conclusions. Next up: Tim's El Tigre Chinos vs Luke's Mad Kents at Imagine Brewing Stadium. Both hosts' teams lost their openers. Loser is out. New SOC episodes every Monday and Thursday. Hit follow so you don't miss one, and leave a rating - it genuinely helps new people find us. How did you find the show, and where are you listening from? Tell us in the comments, or write in to sportingwoodspodcast@gmail.com. We're trying to work out who's out there. Watch this episode on YouTube: https://youtu.be/zhi0tsGcQ2I Chapters:0:00 Cold open and welcome1:24 Win and you're in3:47 Jerseys and lineups5:18 Weather, lawn striping and umpires7:24 Predictions and the toss8:49 Sponsors and the Hooroos' innings9:44 Meet the giant umpire19:34 The toilet on display21:05 First simulation, brought to you by NRL SuperCoach Talk podcast31:15 Brock the Sock hijacks the broadcast34:41 Back to the cricket39:41 Halftime: the sandwich segment40:49 The Wristies' chase52:34 Second simulation, brought to you by Doritos1:02:13 The final two overs1:06:59 Post-match and the Pool B table Music: [Sports FM] by Shane Ivers - https://silvermansound.com

    SOC S4E8 - One Run-Out Changes Absolutely Everything

  3. Oct 28

    SOC S4E7 - Home Turf Heroics End In Total Upset

    Luke's Mad Kents walk into the Stroker Dome as clear favourites. The Wristy Strokers have home ground advantage and a very large field. Welcome to Simulated Online Cricket - a fake T20 league played on a cricket video game and called like it's the real thing. Regular Sporting Woods listeners: this is the cricket one. Pool B round one wraps up at the Stroker Dome's debut: square boundaries, no lawn striping, and a field so big the batters are running twos all night. Michael is back from his week off, and it's a cold one - 17 degrees, which the Wristy Strokers' owner Maddie H, aka "the bad dad", apparently loves. In this episode: - Halftime is "Critiquing Bad Dad Jokes", in honour of the bad dad himself. Tim and Luke rate the cringe live. - The origin of the Montreal mishap, finally explained for anyone who missed Season 1 - Umpires Terry Arky and Tom Arto. Teriyaki and tomato. Some very saucy umpiring. - Will Sheldon Cottrell ever get off the drinks cart? - A beer van gets mistaken for an ambulance - Re-Exporting would like to clarify their business model. It does not get clearer. - Simulations brought to you by the Bloke in a Bar NRL Podcast and New Balance, the preferred shoe of bad dads everywhere Listening, not watching? One of the crowd sponsor signs has been completely blacked out on screen. The boys insist it was too controversial to show. Next up: the Hooroo Pubudus take on the Wristy Strokers at Skatt Bros Stadium. New SOC episodes every Monday and Thursday. Hit follow so you don't miss one, and leave a rating - it genuinely helps new people find us. How did you find the show, and where are you listening from? Tell us in the comments. We're trying to work out who's out there. Watch this episode on YouTube: https://youtu.be/RYrID6F6NNk Music: [Sports FM] by Shane Ivers - https://silvermansound.com

    SOC S4E7 - Home Turf Heroics End In Total Upset

  4. Oct 25

    SOC S4E6 - Four Wickets Down, Somehow Still In It

    Pool B kicks off, and a host has real skin in the game. Welcome to Simulated Online Cricket - a fake T20 league played on a cricket video game and called like it's the real thing. Regular Sporting Woods listeners: this is the cricket one. New pool, new mimosas. But first, the boys deal with the fallout from the end of Pool A - a formal complaint, a committee that includes Commissioner Al Legedly and Brock the Sock, and a ruling that is not going down well with everyone. Then it's on to Angle Park Oval, a brand-new ground with the CBD right behind it and office workers getting a free view from their windows. Tim's El Tigre Chinos, three-time grand finalists, take on Juzzy T's Hooroo Pubudus - a spin-heavy experimental side captained by none other than the Big Corn. It goes all the way down to the very last ball. In this episode: - Michael's halftime game, The Green Glass Door: you can bring a silly dance through, but not vibes. Good gear, yes. A mimosa, no. Can you crack the rule before the boys do? - The Big Corn takes the ball, then orders a burrito from the outfield - The Ivan Cleary-inspired Tigers bus replaces the well-priced family SUVs - Rebasing would like to remind you they do not install basins. Please stop calling. - Simulations brought to you by Lifeblood and Hilton Plasterers - Joffrey Archer - Michael reveals he was born in 2002 (he was not) Listening, not watching? At one point the boys rotate the entire picture sideways to get a better look at a diving catch. It's exactly as bad as it sounds. Think you know the Green Glass Door rule? Drop your guess in the comments before you hear the answer. Next up: Luke's Mad Kents take on the Wristy Strokers at the Stroker Dome. New SOC episodes every Monday and Thursday. Hit follow so you don't miss one, and leave a rating - it genuinely helps new people find us. How did you find the show, and where are you listening from? Tell us in the comments. We're trying to work out who's out there. Watch this episode on YouTube: https://youtu.be/kuE0_ozXFzc Music: [Sports FM] by Shane Ivers - https://silvermansound.com

  5. Oct 21

    SOC S4E5 - Heartbreak At Alpha Arena, Again

    The tightest possible finish, at the one ground that just won't let anyone breathe. Welcome to Simulated Online Cricket - a fake T20 league played on a cricket video game and called like it's the real thing. Regular Sporting Woods listeners: this is the cricket one. It's conflict round, the last round of Pool A. The Brisbane Burners travel to the Alpha Arena to take on the undefeated Revolution, and a win locks in their first ever finals berth. The Burners are fully zen. The Revolution are fully low-key. It comes right down to the final over. In this episode: - Sage burning is banned at the Alpha Arena, so Michael's halftime show becomes "Michael Eats The Sandwich". It's exactly what it sounds like. - Tim and Luke question whether that counts as entertainment. Michael promises you'll hate next week's halftime show even more. - Michael leaves the executive box mid-chase to put his toes on the turf. It does not go well. - Fan favourite umpire Perry Carditis is back, alongside debutant Lou Spowels - Michael's battery-operated personal fan, a perk of the Alpha Arena's executive package - Luke's mustache enters week five of no growth - Where does an Arctic scientist keep his Bitcoin? Thank you, crypto.com. - "Uncle Wayne magic", and some very unfounded allegations about the final pool game Listening, not watching? Yes, Michael really does eat the whole sandwich on camera, for well over 90 seconds, to music. In the video you can also see him vanish from the executive box for his toes-on-turf trip. Got an umpire pun we haven't used yet? The hosts want to hear it. Drop it in the comments. Next up: Pool B gets underway. El Tigre Chinos take on Hooroo Pubudus at Angle Park Oval. New SOC episodes every Monday and Thursday. Hit follow so you don't miss one, and leave a rating - it genuinely helps new people find us. How did you find the show, and where are you listening from? Tell us in the comments. We're trying to work out who's out there. Watch this episode on YouTube: https://youtu.be/5OIaT_I-rF4 Music: [Sports FM] by Shane Ivers - https://silvermansound.com

    SOC S4E5 - Heartbreak At Alpha Arena, Again

  6. Oct 18

    SOC S4E4 - Rain, A Rule Change, And The Last Ball

    Rain, a Duckworth-Lewis parody gone rogue, and a finish that comes down to the very last ball. Welcome to Simulated Online Cricket - a fake T20 league played on a cricket video game and called like it's the real thing. Regular Sporting Woods listeners: this is the cricket one. International round wraps up with our first visit to the Alpha Arena, home of the low-key alphas, The Revolution. They host the defending champs, the Dogs of Waugh, in a rematch of last season's semi-final. Then the weather turns. Play gets interrupted, overs disappear, and the hosts rebuild the whole format live on air with their own version of DLS - "the Duck Lois". In this episode: - The Alpha Arena: massage seats in every row, enormous boundaries, no field markings, and a lone waste bin replacing the well-priced family SUVs - Michael's halftime quiz gets pulled forward by the rain - a Sporting Woods trivia question about the boys' own podcast - An umpire's name escalates from "Racha" to "Sriracha" to "Sir Archer" over the course of the match - Luke cramps up mid-game, live on air. He's calling it his flu game. - Luke's mustache hasn't grown in four weeks and he'd like some answers - Hotels are red, houses are green: Michael settles a Monopoly debate - Pirates were the first into crypto. They bit coins. Thank you, crypto.com. - A low-scoring chase, a dramatic run-out, and a contentious umpiring call Listening, not watching? The game's loading screen gives Steve Smith an unfortunate bulge, and the booth can't stop talking about it. The rain, the empty unmarked field and Virat Kohli's golden spats are all on screen in the video version. Next up: The Revolution host the Brisbane Burners, with a semi-final spot on the line. New SOC episodes every Monday and Thursday. Hit follow so you don't miss one, and leave a rating - it genuinely helps new people find us. How did you find the show, and where are you listening from? Tell us in the comments. We're trying to work out who's out there. Watch this episode on YouTube: https://youtu.be/-H_fnnIaIoU Music: [Sports FM] by Shane Ivers - https://silvermansound.com

    SOC S4E4 - Rain, A Rule Change, And The Last Ball

  7. Oct 14

    SOC S4E3 - Only 3 Recognised Batters

    Retro kits, a halftime sage burning ritual, and another decisive overthrow - business as usual. Welcome to Simulated Online Cricket - a fake T20 league played on a cricket video game and called like it's the real thing. Regular Sporting Woods listeners: this is the cricket one. Round 2 is the season's first themed round: 1992 World Cup commemorative kits, with the Burners in green and the Golden Nuggets in a yellow the hosts insist is canary, not gold. Both teams need a win. The Burners are fielding exactly three recognised batters and Ramen, the sacrificial burner, back at the top. When they fall behind early, The Burners respond the only way they know how: a full halftime sage burning to waft out the bad energy. In this episode: - The Burns Ward revealed: a no-frills home ground with a sand outfield, one side screen, no boundary boards, $25 coffee and groundskeeping once a year - The MTV Next bus is parked in the background again, and the ball goes under it - A real sage burning at halftime. Commentary tracks its effects for the rest of the match. - Should Ramen be promoted from burner to full-time opener? The hosts want your verdict - A new nickname for Trent Boult, the goat stays benched again, and umpires Tom Arto and Euan Watami take the field - Simulations brought to you by PK Trey Tilts (not to be confused with KP Tilt Trays) and 3 Mobile, from the makers of 2 Mobile - For the second time this season, a stray overthrow matters more than anyone could have predicted Listening, not watching? Yes, the sage burning was real - the hosts confirm it on air for podcast listeners specifically. The retro kits, the leftover airline logo still painted on the field and the MTV Next bus are all visible in the video version. Next up: The Revolution take on the Dogs of Waugh at the Alpha Arena. New SOC episodes every Monday and Thursday. Hit follow so you don't miss one, and leave a rating - it genuinely helps new people find us. How did you find the show, and where are you listening from? Tell us in the comments. We're trying to work out who's out there. Watch this episode on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XWcioGQ3Uqc Music: [Sports FM] by Shane Ivers - https://silvermansound.com

    SOC S4E3 - Only 3 Recognised Batters

  8. Oct 11

    SOC S4E2 - One Dropped Catch Ruined Everything

    A dropped catch at the Canary Islands might be the moment that decides this whole match. Welcome to Simulated Online Cricket - a fake T20 league played on a cricket video game and called like it's the real thing. Regular Sporting Woods listeners: this is the cricket one. Round 1 rolls on at Municipality of Las Palmas Oval, where the Golden Nuggets host The Revolution. A routine chance goes down off Big Goss's hands mid-chase, and the whole game changes from there. The mullet duo of Colin de Grandhomme and Ishant Sharma (the golden mullet, if you're new here) do their best, but it's the drop everyone's still talking about by the final over. In this episode: - Tim and Luke, still reeling from last episode's tie - Stump the Boys debuts at halftime: an officially sanctioned (Michael's words) trivia segment - A detour into dips that nobody saw coming - guac, tzatziki, hummus, baba ganoush - plus Luke's 10kg of gravy powder - A review so dramatic it gets thermal vision - The well-priced family SUVs have been upgraded. They're family work vans now. - Every four and six brought to you by a sponsor. Astral Pipes are back. They still pipe. Listening, not watching? The review uses mock "thermal vision" and slow-mo replays on screen, all played completely straight. Michael is still broadcasting from his executive lounge set. Who do you reckon wins next time? Next up: the Brisbane Burners host the Golden Nuggets at The Burns Ward. New SOC episodes every Monday and Thursday. Hit follow so you don't miss one, and leave a rating - it genuinely helps new people find us. How did you find the show? Tell us in the comments. We're trying to work out who's out there. Watch this episode on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SUJ0uQnaFAM Music: [Sports FM] by Shane Ivers - https://silvermansound.com

    SOC S4E2 - One Dropped Catch Ruined Everything
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About

SPORTS! From all over the world. SPORTS!! Mostly Australia focused. SPORTS!!! Now showing: Simulated Online Cricket (SOC) - a fake T20 league played on a cricket video game and called like it's the real thing. New SOC episodes every Monday and Thursday. Starring Luke Gold, Tim Stanton and Michael Vilkins.

Information

  • Creator
    Luke Gold, Tim Stanton and Michael Vilkins
  • Years Active
    2015 - 2026
  • Episodes
    266
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © Luke Gold, Tim Stanton and Michael Vilkins
  • Show Website
    Sporting Woods