Real Men Feel with Andy Grant

Andy Grant | Authenticity & Masculinity Coach
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Real Men Feel helps men grow beyond outdated rules of masculinity to live with authenticity, purpose, and joy. Since 2016, host Andy Grant has explored how vulnerability, courage, and real conversation fuel personal growth, self-improvement, and emotional well-being. 🥇 Silver Signal Award Winner – Most Inspirational Podcast & Best Self-Help Show. 🎧 Join our free community for men at https://realmenfeel.org/group 💬 Want to be a guest? Connect with Andy on PodMatch, https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/realmenfeel 🔗 Show notes & resources: https://realmenfeel.org

  1. Reinventing Yourself: Autonomy, Competence, and Connection

    1H AGO

    Reinventing Yourself: Autonomy, Competence, and Connection

    Reinvention, Grief, and Identity After Corporate Life On Real Men Feel, host Andy Grant talks with reinvention coach Shelley McIntyre about why workplace change triggers resistance rooted in grief and fear of loss, explained through self-determination theory’s three needs: autonomy, competence, and connection. McIntyre distinguishes reinvention coaching from career coaching by focusing on identity questions—when high achievers feel they’ve “masked” themselves with competence, status, and titles, and fear they won’t matter without them. They discuss the hidden grief of losing a career path, the “invisible contract” of loyalty for security that companies don’t actually honor, and signs it’s time to move on, including not liking who you’ve become, loss of belief in the work, and body sensations like “soul rot.” McIntyre outlines phases of reinvention (identity crisis, rebuilding foundation, experimentation) and emphasizes vulnerability, emotional vocabulary tools like an emotions wheel, and low-stakes steps like talking to people who’ve left corporate life, while reminding men that their value is inherent. 00:00 Three Needs Triangle00:44 Meet The Guest01:26 From Strategy To Coaching02:10 Resistance And Grief03:31 Self Determination At Work04:45 Reinvention Not Career Coaching06:11 When Competence Becomes Mask07:57 Title Status And Terror10:19 Layoffs Threaten Autonomy10:49 Signs It's Time To Leave12:55 Annihilation Fear And Culture14:45 Invisible Contract Myth17:33 Razor Blade Comfort Zone18:20 Four Phases Of Reinvention20:02 Crisis Versus Pre-Growth24:15 Vulnerability Fuels Change27:16 Emotion Wheel And Vocabulary29:01 Low Stakes First Steps30:42 Where To Find Shelley31:11 Inherent Value Closing31:55 Final Takeaways And Invite Connect with ShelleyShelley McIntyre — https://burnthemapcoaching.com/Burn The Map Podcast — https://burnthemapcoaching.com/podcast/LinkedIn — https://www.linkedin.com/in/shelley-mcintyre/ Connect with Andy:Join other like-minded men in theAuthentic AF Community | https://www.realmenfeel.org/group⁠⁠Instagram | @realmenfeelshow & @theandygrantAndy Grant | https://theandygrant.com⁠⁠⁠ for coaching, healing, and book info!Real Men Feel | http://⁠⁠realmenfeel.org⁠⁠⁠YouTube | https://youtube.com/realmenfeel⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ #RealMenFeel ep 402

    33 min
  2. Life Reboot: Embracing Vulnerability and Setting Boundaries

    APR 24

    Life Reboot: Embracing Vulnerability and Setting Boundaries

    From Burnout to Boundaries: Clarity, Values, and Life Reboot Host Andy Grant interviews coach Loren Silverman, who helps overwhelmed high performers set healthier boundaries, clarify values, and rebuild steadier lives, including through his gamified 12-week “Life Reboot Nerd Edition” (a Dungeons & Dragons-style framework where clients “level up” real-life skills like boundaries and energy mastery). Silverman shares his own burnout and how the 2022 Ukraine invasion—impacting his Ukrainian dev team—prompted him to travel to Poland to transport refugees, reshaping how he wanted to serve people. Loren emphasizes pausing for self-awareness, naming emotions (using tools like a feelings wheel), and choosing clarity over trying harder when misaligned with values: “Are you just not satisfied, or are you despondent?” He defines boundaries as protecting time and energy, warns against reflexive yeses, describes “cleaner conversations” via clear requests, and uses pinball’s “dead bounce” as a metaphor for patience and measured response. He encourages men to embrace vulnerability and intimacy with male friends. 00:00 Name Your Feelings00:18 Meet Loren Silverman00:57 Burnout to Coaching01:36 Ukraine Turning Point05:20 What Burnout Felt Like07:25 Values Before Action08:27 Pause Reboot Grow09:01 Clarity Beats Effort11:15 Life Reboot Nerd Edition14:03 Boundaries That Protect17:25 Clean Conversations19:44 Feelings Wheel Basics20:58 Tracking Real Progress22:04 Pinball Life Lessons24:56 Connect and Final WisdomConnect with LorenLoren Silverman — https://www.silvermancoach.com/LinkedIn — https://www.linkedin.com/in/lorensilverman/Instagram — https://www.instagram.com/lorensilvermancoach/Facebook — https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61578400050255 Connect with Andy:Join other like-minded men in theAuthentic AF Community | https://www.realmenfeel.org/group⁠Instagram | @realmenfeelshow & @theandygrantAndy Grant | https://theandygrant.com⁠⁠ for coaching, healing, and book info!Real Men Feel | http://⁠⁠realmenfeel.org⁠⁠YouTube | https://youtube.com/realmenfeel⁠⁠⁠⁠ #RealMenFeel ep 401

    28 min
  3. The Invisible Scorecard—What Men Measure and Who They Become

    APR 17

    The Invisible Scorecard—What Men Measure and Who They Become

    Episode 400: The Invisible Scorecard Host Andy Grant marks Real Men Feel’s 400th episode and 10-year anniversary with returning guest Vanessa Cardenas, a relationship reset expert, to examine how men constantly measure themselves through an “invisible scorecard” of success, money, status, age, and relationship milestones. They discuss how comparison “pulls a man out of his life and puts him onto someone else’s timeline,” eroding confidence and intimacy, especially when men fill gaps with imagined stories about past partners. Cardenas emphasizes authenticity, dropping the mask, reducing destructive scorekeeping, and using milestones in healthy ways, noting that clarity builds confidence, which in turn supports intimacy. She shares coaching approaches that focus on the here-and-now, appreciation and recognition in relationships, and practical communication shifts. They also explore how significant transformation can happen in 400 minutes, hours, days, or months, and close by urging men to stop measuring by others’ standards and focus on who they are becoming. 00:00 Episode 400 Milestone01:24 Vanessa Returns03:35 Why We Measure04:50 Men Internal Scorecard08:27 Comparison Social Media12:17 Mythic Man Programming14:06 Find Your People17:19 Comparison Kills Intimacy20:20 Clarity Builds Confidence22:22 Say It Differently25:03 Relationship Reset Work26:32 Coaching Not Therapy27:49 Starting Sessions With Praise29:30 Drop Comparisons And Scorecards31:06 Milestones Versus Keeping Score32:14 Transform In 40036:29 Men Need Appreciation39:03 Compliments And Being Noticed42:41 Invest In The Work43:39 Authenticity And Connection46:24 Metallica Quote And Joy47:51 Final Takeaways And Thanks Connect with VanessaUnderstanding Ear — https://understandingear.com LinkedIn — https://www.linkedin.com/in/vanessa-cardenas-relationship-reset/Instagram — https://www.instagram.com/vanessa_understandingear/YouTube — https://www.youtube.com/@Vanessa-Cardenas ResourcesPrior appearances of Vanessa Cardenas — https://www.realmenfeel.org/guests/vanessa-cardenas/ Connect with Andy and the Real Men Feel Podcast:Join other like-minded men in theAuthentic AF Community | https://www.realmenfeel.org/groupInstagram | @realmenfeelshow & @theandygrantAndy Grant | https://theandygrant.com⁠ for coaching, healing, and book info!Real Men Feel | http://⁠⁠realmenfeel.org⁠YouTube | https://youtube.com/realmenfeel⁠⁠ #RealMenFeel ep 400

    49 min
  4. Betrayal Trauma Isn't Something You Just Get Over

    APR 10

    Betrayal Trauma Isn't Something You Just Get Over

    Betrayal, Shame & Rebuilding Trust: The Therapy Brothers on Real Recovery On Real Men Feel, host Andy Grant talks with licensed clinicians Brannon Patrick and Tyler Patrick (the Therapy Brothers) about betrayal, shame, trust, and recovery after relationship rupture. They share what drew them into trauma, addiction, infidelity, and betrayal work, why men often seek help only after disclosure or rock bottom, and how fear of rejection and “unlovability” drives hiding, overperforming, and defensiveness. They describe betrayal trauma as complex trauma with PTSD-like symptoms and explain that healing requires safety, validation, and time rather than pressure to “just get over it.” They unpack “Mr. Nice Guy” patterns as fear-based manipulation, distinguish apology from accountability rooted in personal integrity, and emphasize rebuilding trust through authenticity, empathy, and consistent action. They outline shame resilience—awareness, self-compassion, and courageous disclosure—and discuss surrendering performance-based spirituality. 00:00 Shame and Hiding00:32 Show Intro and Guests01:29 Why They Became Therapists05:33 Men and Rock Bottom09:29 Betrayal Trauma Explained11:53 Why Just Get Over It Fails13:27 Mr Nice Guy Pattern18:07 Authenticity and Self Trust21:03 Roots of Betrayal and Addiction22:12 Apology Versus Accountability23:32 Integrity Apologies24:18 Building Safety Trust25:29 Shame Hiding Cycle28:38 Shame Resilience Tools30:03 Surrender Not Performance33:05 Tyler Rock Bottom Story36:40 Reclaim Your Heart39:19 Connect With Brothers40:16 What Men Need Know42:36 Final Takeaways Connect with Brannon and TylerReclaim Your Heart — https://reclaimyourheart.orgTherapy Brothers — https://therapybrothers.org/Instagram — https://instagram.com/therapy.brothersYouTube — https://youtube.com/@therapy.brothers Connect with Andy and the Real Men Feel Podcast:Join other like-minded men in theAuthentic AF Community | https://www.realmenfeel.org/groupInstagram | @realmenfeelshow & @theandygrantAndy Grant | https://theandygrant.com⁠ for coaching, healing, and book info!Real Men Feel | http://⁠⁠realmenfeel.org⁠YouTube | https://youtube.com/realmenfeel⁠⁠ #RealMenFeel ep 399

    44 min
  5. Aligning Success with Soul: From Rock Bottom to Purpose

    APR 3

    Aligning Success with Soul: From Rock Bottom to Purpose

    Success, Intuition, and Purpose: Paul Davis on Unlocking Your Genius Host Andy Grant interviews business growth consultant and intuitive advisor Paul Davis about aligning business success with purpose, meaning, and self-care. Davis explains that financial turnarounds don’t last if the owner’s mindset, beliefs, and unresolved childhood trauma aren’t addressed, citing ACE scores and how fear, shame, and guilt can escalate depression and suicidal ideation. He shares his own lifelong suicidal thoughts, why he hid them to avoid appearing weak or risky in senior roles, and how his brother Eugene’s death prompted him to speak openly and develop a methodology for purpose. Davis outlines “genius” as an innate spirit and describes four purpose elements: a life quest/mission, divine inspiration, three “genius drivers” for fulfillment, and a “genius role” archetype. He emphasizes giving “from the saucer, not from the cup,” building intuition, and living with an “open hand” rather than a constant focus on productivity. 00:00 Why Leaders Stay Silent00:27 Meet Paul Davis01:29 Business Meets Mindset03:22 Sunrise Wake Up Call05:15 Dark Questions Early06:29 Research And New Method08:35 Service And Mission09:57 Why Success Feels Empty10:38 Trauma Triggers Self Care15:04 Why He Hid It18:17 Loss Changed Everything20:19 Defining Genius21:02 Divine Inspiration Explained21:32 Why Finding Your Why Fails22:10 Genius Drivers And Fulfillment22:49 Genius Roles And Alignment24:27 Success Without Purpose26:23 Intuition And Seventh Son29:19 What Leaders Need Most31:24 Find Your Lifelong Quest35:00 Meaningful Life And Legacy37:04 Open Hand Living Advice38:59 Final Wrap And Resources Connect with PaulPaul Davis — https://davisbusinessconsultants.com/LinkedIn — linkedin.com/in/pauldavisdublinYouTube — https://www.youtube.com/davisconsultants ResourcesGenius Unlocked: Discover Your Life Purpose & Innate Genius by Paul Davis — https://amzn.to/4tq8JNcAll of Paul’s books — https://amzn.to/4tq8JNc Connect with Andy and the Real Men Feel Podcast:Join me and connect with other like-minded men in theAuthentic AF Community | https://realmenfeel.org/group⁠Instagram | @realmenfeelshow & @theandygrantAndy Grant | https://theandygrant.com⁠ for coaching, healing, and book info!Real Men Feel | https://www.realmenfeel.org/YouTube | https://youtube.com/realmenfeel⁠⁠ #RealMenFeel ep 398

    40 min
  6. Men's Silent Struggles: Overcoming Loneliness and Rejection

    MAR 27

    Men's Silent Struggles: Overcoming Loneliness and Rejection

    Rebuilding After Betrayal, Divorce, and the Dead Bedroom: Ralph Brewer on Men, Shame, and Support Host Andy Grant interviews men’s coach Ralph Brewer about rebuilding after infidelity, divorce, and relationship collapse. Ralph shares his own experience of being divorced within 60 days after his spouse’s infidelity and becoming a single father of three, including how he blamed himself for years and later learned he couldn’t control another person’s choices. He explains how therapy and connecting with other men led him to create the “Dad Starting Over” platform, write five books—starting with the breakout “The Dead Bedroom Fix”—and build HelpForMen.com and the paid Brotherhood community with frequent Zoom meetings, forums, conferences, and coaching. They discuss common patterns among anxious, codependent “Mr. Nice Guy” men paired with avoidant partners, how “man up” emotional suppression causes flatness and mental health issues, the risks of bitterness and rapid rebound dating, and why peer support and asking for help are essential. 00:00 Shame and Masculinity00:19 Show Intro and Guest01:28 Ralph's Divorce Story02:34 Owning Too Much Blame03:58 Therapy and Brotherhood05:10 From Blog to Brand07:32 Identity After Breakup10:29 Man Up Culture Costs12:15 Anxious Avoidant Trap15:48 Rewiring Shame and Self-Worth18:07 Dead Bedroom Explained19:58 First Step Honest Inventory21:11 Why Men Choose Wrong21:51 Pragmatic Partner Vetting22:55 Divorce Patterns Repeat23:56 Avoiding Bitter Blame25:36 Rebound Relationship Trap26:53 Neurodivergence And Dating29:27 Rock Bottom And Coping32:04 Brotherhood And Community36:52 How To Find Ralph38:31 Ask For Help40:01 Final Takeaways Connect with RalphRalph Brewer — https://helpformen.com/Facebook — https://www.facebook.com/dadstartingoverInstagram — https://instagram.com/dadstartingover ResourcesThe Dead Bedroom Fix by Ralph Brewer — https://amzn.to/4tgMJ7nAll of Ralph’s books — https://amzn.to/4s85KYM Join other like-minded men in theAuthentic AF Community | http://realmenfeel.org/groupInstagram | @realmenfeelshow & @theandygrantAndy Grant | https://theandygrant.com for coaching, healing, and book info!Real Men Feel | http://realmenfeel.orgYouTube | https://youtube.com/realmenfeel #RealMenFeel ep 397

    41 min
  7. Redefining Success: The Hollow Man Syndrome

    MAR 20

    Redefining Success: The Hollow Man Syndrome

    The Hollow Man Syndrome: Redefining Success, Vulnerability, and the New Alpha Host Andy Grant interviews Kenyada Meadows, a Bank of America senior vice president and master certified executive coach, about “hollow man syndrome”—men who appear successful but feel empty and unfulfilled. Meadows explains the metaphor of a strong tree with decaying roots and describes how hollowing out can manifest as strained relationships, self-medicating, short tempers, or acting out. He contrasts traditional “alpha” achievement-driven masculinity with “emotional integrity,” emphasizing vulnerability, community, and emotional literacy as skills for connection and asking for help. Meadows outlines his “New Alpha” framework of three domains—relationships at work, at home, and with oneself—critiques the myth of perfect work-life balance with the idea of “wobbling well,” and discusses re-parenting the inner child, grace, and intentional reflection. He shares taking four months of paid parental leave in a competitive Wall Street environment, finding no downside, and encourages men to broaden “providing” beyond money to presence and communication. 00:00 The Hollow Tree Metaphor 00:31 Meet Kenyada Meadows 01:32 Defining Hollow Man Syndrome 04:19 Personal Turning Points 05:37 Mentorship and The New Alpha 08:23 Costs of Traditional Alpha 09:56 Emotional Integrity Skills 14:38 Why High Achievers Feel Empty 16:31 Wobbling Work Life Balance 18:40 Reparenting the Inner Child 21:07 Taking Paternity Leave 24:02 Providing Beyond Money 28:04 Three Domains Framework 29:49 Rethinking Alpha Culture 32:46 Connect and Final Takeaway 36:15 Closing and Community Invite Connect with Kenyada Kenyada Meadows — https://www.executiveparentcompany.com/ LinkedIn — https://www.linkedin.com/in/kenyadameadowscpaciacfe/Resources The New Alpha: Be Three Times the Leader Through Balance, Not Dominance by Kenyada Meadows — https://amzn.to/4bA4BCV Connect with Andy and the Real Men Feel Podcast: Join me and connect with other like-minded men in the Authentic AF Community | http://realmenfeel.org/group Instagram | @realmenfeelshow & @theandygrant Andy Grant | https://theandygrant.com for coaching, healing, and book info! Real Men Feel | http://realmenfeel.org YouTube | https://youtube.com/realmenfeel #RealMenFeel ep 396

    37 min
  8. Men's Health and Healing: Exploring Modern Masculinity

    MAR 13

    Men's Health and Healing: Exploring Modern Masculinity

    Men’s Health, Loneliness, and Real Masculinity Host Andy Grant opens by saying men need truth and connection, not shame or fake strength. After a guest postpones due to health news, Andy shares he has a colonoscopy scheduled and urges men to prioritize physical health: get annual checkups, know family history, ask doctors questions, and follow colorectal cancer screening guidance, noting rising deaths under 50 and citing Chadwick Boseman and James Van Der Beek. He then discusses an international survey reporting that about a third of Gen Z men believe wives should obey husbands and husbands should have final say, interpreting this as a search for identity, direction, belonging, respect, purpose, and brotherhood. Andy argues that men are hurting without language, loneliness increases vulnerability to harmful online narratives, and real masculinity is responsibility, integrity, presence, and emotional honesty, inviting listeners to join his community at https://realmenfeel.org/group. 00:00 What Men Really Need00:18 Welcome and Plans Change00:44 Colonoscopy Wake Up Call01:22 Screening Facts and Risks02:31 Gen Z Survey Shock03:18 What Men Are Hungry For04:32 Pain Turns Into Anger05:15 Loneliness and Online Voices06:05 Masculinity Without Domination07:17 Why Real Men Feel Exists07:38 Two Reminders and Next Steps Connect with Andy and the Real Men Feel Podcast:Join us in the Authentic AF Community | http://realmenfeel.org/groupInstagram | @realmenfeelshow & @theandygrantAndy Grant | https://theandygrant.com for coaching, healing, and book info!Real Men Feel | http://realmenfeel.orgYouTube | https://youtube.com/realmenfeel #RealMenFeel ep 395

    9 min
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About

Real Men Feel helps men grow beyond outdated rules of masculinity to live with authenticity, purpose, and joy. Since 2016, host Andy Grant has explored how vulnerability, courage, and real conversation fuel personal growth, self-improvement, and emotional well-being. 🥇 Silver Signal Award Winner – Most Inspirational Podcast & Best Self-Help Show. 🎧 Join our free community for men at https://realmenfeel.org/group 💬 Want to be a guest? Connect with Andy on PodMatch, https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/realmenfeel 🔗 Show notes & resources: https://realmenfeel.org

Information

  • Creator
    Andy Grant | Authenticity & Masculinity Coach
  • Years Active
    2016 - 2026
  • Episodes
    401
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © Andy Grant | Authenticity & Masculinity Coach
  • Show Website
    Real Men Feel with Andy Grant