A “Mixed” Bipolar Life

i’m not sure if you’re still trying to do this podcast or just taking a needed break, whichever the case i hope you come back to it. i’m 38 years old and after a literal lifetime of suffering in total confusion of my seemingly unrelated symptoms i have been tentatively (finally, thankfully) diagnosed with ultradian rapid cycling bipolar 2 with mixed features. this came as a result of being (mis?)diagnosed with ADHD, depression and anxiety, going on Adderall alone and being pushed into a full blown manic state with elements of psychosis wherein i also got down to 103 pounds without realizing that i’d lost nearly 20 pounds in 3 months, among other terribly unsafe happenings. this new diagnosis is the first time i’ve ever felt like i’ve found the “right” thing that i always knew was so wrong with me but couldn’t explain. i’ve always thought i must just be stupid, selfish and lazy. this disorder is such a mouthful and so complicated it’s dizzying, so to hear a woman who is also of a mature age explain what she goes though is most heartening. i’m still struggling terribly with accepting this as my new reality and grieving as well. i’m afraid of the medication. i’m single and i live alone and also (duh) isolate. i’ve never felt more lonely and alone than now, which is really saying something, and this podcast feels like a lifeline. i will absolutely be re-listening to them all and i’m glad to have so many in the bank already. please keep recording, when you are ready and up for it. people like me need people like you. thank you for sharing and thank you for being brave and vulnerable. you and what i know are your tremendous efforts are so appreciated and so very necessary. keep going. you can do this. we’re all rooting for you even if you don’t know we exist. ♥️

It’s too bad that I have misophonia too and could not listen to this podcast because of all the tongue clicking. It takes practice to speak clearly and time to edit out clicks and pops. It’s too bad, there’s some topics I really wanted to listen to.

This is not a slam on you. However I almost cried trying to listen to your podcast and I couldn’t get through episodes because of misophonia and the mouth sounds. 😭😭😭 I love the info and it is much needed for me but I just can’t.

There’s just way too many spit noises and swallowing to even enjoy what she was saying.