Other People's Shoes

Neil Matthews

On my show, I intentionally create space for every voice and every point of view to be heard. Honest, constructive conversations have a way of opening our eyes to stories we might otherwise miss. After all, when you step into Other People’s Shoes, you gain what we’re all searching for… a different perspective on life.

  1. Ghosted

    1d ago

    Ghosted

    🎙 GHOSTED Season 23: The List What does it mean to be ghosted? Ghosting is when someone suddenly cuts off communication without explanation. No phone call. No text. No goodbye. One day they're there... the next day they're gone. Most of us have a name on our list connected to that kind of silence. A relationship that ended without closure. A friendship that disappeared. A conversation that never happened. But what if being ghosted isn't the end of the story? What if there is something to learn from the silence? In this episode, we explore heartbreak, healing, self-awareness, and whether some of life's most painful endings can become opportunities for growth. 📝 GUEST INTRODUCTION Today, we're joined by Gareth Pickering from South Africa. Gareth imagines a world where relationships and sexuality are remembered as sacred pathways to healing and awakening. For more than a decade, he has explored and taught frameworks that help men deepen their relationships, connect with their emotions, and live more authentic lives. Through meditation, emotional awareness, authentic relating, men's work, and sacred sexuality, Gareth helps men return to themselves, lead with presence, and embrace radical self-acceptance. His mission is ambitious and inspiring: to guide one billion men back to the understanding that who they are right now is enough. 📝 In this conversation, Neil and Gareth discuss: ✔️ What it feels like to be ghosted ✔️ Why unanswered questions can be so difficult to carry ✔️ Trusting your intuition in relationships ✔️ The lessons hidden inside breakups ✔️ How every relationship can teach us something about ourselves ✔️ Gratitude, growth, and healing after loss ✔️ Self-acceptance and emotional awareness ✔️ Learning how to move forward without closure This episode asks some powerful questions: Do we trust our intuition? Is there really a lesson to be learned in a breakup? When someone comes into our life, can we grow from that experience? Is it possible to be grateful for being ghosted? Sometimes the people who leave us behind also leave us with lessons we never expected to learn. 📝 CONNECT WITH GUEST 👤 Website 📸 Instagram 📝 OTHER PEOPLE'S SHOES 👟 Website | 📘 Facebook | 📸 Instagram | 𝕏 X | 🎬 TikTok | 🎧 Apple Podcasts Listen, grow, and gain a different perspective on life by walking in Other People's shoes. 📝  🩵 Enjoying the show? Your review helps more people discover stories that inspire empathy, growth, and understanding. ⭐️ Leave a Review Thank you for walking in Other People's Shoes. 👟🩵

    45 min
  2. Password

    Jun 10

    Password

    🎙 Password Season 23: The List We all have a list. Names we'd rather not hear. People we'd rather avoid. Conversations we'd rather never have again. Some people earn a place on that list through betrayal. Others through disappointment, abandonment, or broken trust. But what if forgiveness doesn't mean giving everyone unlimited access to your life? What if grace and boundaries can exist at the same time? In this episode, Coach Nrgy Abrams introduces a powerful idea: not everyone gets the password. Not everyone should have unrestricted access to your heart, your time, your energy, or your future. As we continue our journey through The List, this conversation challenges us to think differently about forgiveness, trust, healing, and the wisdom required to know the difference between letting go and letting someone back in. We also explore a simple phrase that has helped countless people through life's hardest seasons: "Be patient. Have faith." Because healing takes time. Forgiveness takes work. And sometimes growth requires trusting the process long before you can see the outcome. GUEST INTRODUCTION Coach Nrgy Abrams is a Transformational Keynote Speaker, Certified Breakthrough Life & Relationship Coach, Court Registered Civil Mediator, Family & Divorce Mediator and Arbitrator, Ordained Minister, and passionate advocate for personal transformation. Known as "The Self-Mastery Coach," Nrgy teaches that when we learn to master our minds, emotions, and assignments, we begin to master our lives. She helps high achievers unlock their potential, navigate life's challenges, strengthen relationships, improve communication, and create lasting change. Whether working with individuals, families, couples, or single parents, her mission remains the same: helping people become the best version of themselves. EPISODE DETAILS 🗝️ Why forgiveness doesn't automatically restore access 🗝️ The difference between grace and unhealthy boundaries 🗝️ Why some people should not have the password to your life 🗝️ The power behind the phrase "Be patient. Have faith." 🗝️ How self-mastery impacts every relationship you have Three Key Takeaways ✅ Self-identity must change before life can change ✅ Want the change ✅ Commit to the change CONNECT WITH NRGY 🌐 Website: https://www.coachnrgy.com/ 📺 YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@CoachNrgy FOLLOW OTHER PEOPLE'S SHOES 👟 | 📘 | 📸 | 𝕏 | 🎬 | 🎧 LEAVE US A REVIEW If this episode challenged the way you think about forgiveness, boundaries, and healing, please consider leaving a Review. 📝 Reviews help more people discover Other People's Shoes and join us as we continue exploring The List—one story, one step, and one conversation at a time.

    46 min
  3. Save The Tiger

    Jun 3

    Save The Tiger

    🎙 SAVE THE TIGER THE LIST We all have one. A list we don't write down. A list we don't talk about. A list of people we just can't seem to forgive. Sometimes the names on that list belong to people who betrayed us. Sometimes they belong to people who manipulated us. And sometimes... They belong to people who convinced us they were speaking for God. 👣 GUEST INTRODUCTION In the summer of 1997, Peter Young was living the dream. A former college basketball player and coach, Peter had landed his dream job as a sports broadcaster. He married the woman he loved, started a family, and watched his television career flourish. Life was good. There was only one problem. A mysterious spiritual leader known simply as "Uncle Robert." What began as an uncomfortable family dynamic slowly became something much more dangerous. Over the years, Uncle Robert's influence grew beyond spiritual advice and into nearly every aspect of family life. Marriages, parenting decisions, relationships, and personal beliefs all seemed to orbit around one man. Peter shares that journey in his powerful memoir, Stop the Tall Man, Save the Tiger. 📝 EPISODE DETAILS In this episode, Peter takes us inside the strange and unsettling world of Uncle Robert Booty, a self-appointed spiritual authority whose influence slowly took control of Peter's marriage, family, and sense of reality. What started as a love story became a decades-long struggle with manipulation, spiritual abuse, coercive control, and the pressure to surrender his own judgment. Peter discusses how religious language was used to demand obedience, why questioning the group came with consequences, and how he ultimately found the courage to reclaim his identity and freedom. We also explore forgiveness. Is forgiveness possible when someone never apologizes? Can you move forward without forgetting? And what happens when the person who hurt you still believes they did nothing wrong? It's a conversation about faith, family, influence, freedom, and what it takes to break free when control disguises itself as truth. 🔗 CONNECT WITH PETER YOUNG 🌐 Website 📸 Instagram 📖 Book 👟 OTHER PEOPLE'S SHOES 📸 Instagram 📘 Facebook 𝕏 X ▶️ YouTube 🌐 Website ⭐ LEAVE US A REVIEW If this episode moved you, challenged you, or gave you something to think about—don't keep it to yourself! ⭐ Leave a Review and let us know how stepping into Peter's shoes impacted you.

    45 min
  4. Unlovable Flower

    May 27

    Unlovable Flower

    🎙 UNLOVEABLE FLOWER 📝  "THE LIST" We all carry names we struggle to say out loud. Some names still sting.Some names still echo.Some names still have the power to change our mood the second we hear them. And sometimes…the hardest part isn’t what they did. It’s what their actions made us believe about ourselves. 📝  Do me a favor… Close your eyes right now.(Only if you’re somewhere safe.) Think of a name. A person whose name still brings anger…hurt…frustration…sadness. Maybe hearing their name still makes your stomach turn.Maybe seeing it written on paper would bring all those feelings rushing back.Maybe there’s even a celebrity who shares that same name…and you can’t stand them either. Now open your eyes. That person isn’t standing in front of you.They aren’t texting you.They aren’t calling you. But they still live somewhere inside your story. And this week’s guest knows exactly what that feels like. 👣 GUEST INTRODUCTION Brooke Van Doren knows what it feels like when betrayal detonates your world overnight. After discovering her husband’s affair, Brooke found herself spiraling through heartbreak, confusion, anger, and childhood wounds she didn’t even realize were still shaping her life. Therapy became more than survival. It became a mirror. A place where she was forced to confront trauma, grief, behavioral patterns, accountability, and the parts of herself she had spent years trying to outrun. Now a therapist-in-training, speaker, author, and founder of Messy Healing, Brooke helps others navigate betrayal, anxiety, emotional overwhelm, and healing without shame or judgment. Because healing isn’t neat.It isn’t polished.And it definitely isn’t linear. Sometimes the mess is exactly where the truth begins. ✏️ IN THIS EPISODE 💔 Can a marriage survive infidelity? 🧠 How imagination can become its own form of torture 🪞 The painful connection between betrayal and childhood wounds 🌱 Why healing starts with radical honesty 📓 How journaling became part of Brooke’s recovery process 😔 The emotional weight of feeling “unloveable” ❤️ What forgiveness actually looks like in real life 👣 Learning how to sit with pain instead of running from it ❓TAKE AWAY... Could you heal after discovering your spouse was unfaithful? What would you do if you found photos of your spouse with someone else? How often does your imagination make the pain worse? Is there something you could never forgive in a marriage? 🌿  MESSY HEALING Through her platform “Messy Healing,” Brooke creates tools and conversations centered around emotional healing, therapy, accountability, nervous system regulation, and self-awareness. Her Therapy Companion Journals were created from her own personal need to process emotions between therapy sessions — helping people identify triggers, emotional patterns, anxiety responses, and ways to better communicate and care for themselves. Brooke believes healing continues outside the therapist’s office…and sometimes writing things down helps us finally connect the dots. 🔗 CONNECT WITH BROOKE 🌐 Website: Messy Healing📸 Instagram: @messyhealing 👟 OTHER PEOPLE’S SHOES 📸 Instagram 👍 Facebook 🐦 X (Twitter) ▶️ YouTube 🌐 Website ⭐ LEAVE A REVIEW If this episode challenged you, made you uncomfortable, or helped you feel a little less alone… Please share it. And if Other People’s Shoes has impacted you in some way, consider leaving a review. Your words help more people step into stories that might change the way they see others… and themselves.

    41 min
  5. Outside

    May 20

    Outside

    🎙 OUTSIDE THE LIST We all carry one. A list of moments.A list of people.A list of choices we wish we could undo. Sometimes forgiveness isn’t just about what was done to us…sometimes it’s about facing the damage we caused ourselves. 👣 GUEST INTRODUCTION Matthew Sisneros shares a story marked by consequences, regret, and the long road toward accountability. In this episode of Other People’s Shoes, we step outside the headlines and into the human story behind a life-altering decision connected to an armed robbery in Buffalo, Minnesota. What happens after the headlines fade? What does remorse really look like when the dust settles and you’re left alone with your choices? And can someone ever truly find redemption after becoming known for the worst thing they’ve ever done? This conversation is raw, honest, and deeply reflective as we talk about guilt, shame, accountability, forgiveness, and the difficult process of rebuilding a life from the outside looking in. 📝 FACTS ABOUT THE CASE During this episode, we discuss the events surrounding an armed robbery that took place on April 24, 2013, at McDonald’s in Buffalo, Minnesota. According to federal court records: Matthew Sisneros later pleaded guilty in federal court connected to the robbery. Approximately $3,466 was taken from the restaurant. Employees were threatened with a sawed-off 12-gauge shotgun during the incident. 🎧 EPISODE TAKEAWAYS One decision can change everything. Shame grows in isolation. Accountability is painful… but necessary. Forgiveness does not erase consequences. Redemption starts when honesty replaces hiding. 👟 OPS Links Instagram Facebook X (Twitter) YouTube Website ⭐ LEAVE US A REVIEW If this episode challenged you, moved you, or made you think differently about forgiveness and redemption, please consider leaving a review. Your support helps more people step into the stories of others… one pair of shoes at a time.

    38 min
  6. Staircase

    May 13

    Staircase

    ⚠️ CONTENT WARNING This episode contains discussions surrounding suicide, trauma, grief, and emotional loss that may be difficult for some listeners. Listener discretion is advised. If you or someone you know is struggling, please know you are not alone. In the United States and Canada, help is available by calling or texting 988 for the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. There is hope. There is help. And your story is not over. 🎙 STAIRCASE THE LIST We all wish forgiveness happened in a moment. One apology. One prayer. One decision… and suddenly the pain disappears. But forgiveness usually doesn’t work like that. It’s more like climbing a staircase. One step forward. One hard conversation. One choice to let go… even when part of you still wants to hold on. Some days you feel like you’re making progress. Other days you feel stuck on the same step you’ve been standing on for years. Because forgiveness isn’t easy. Especially when the wounds run deep. Sometimes the wounds come from betrayal. Sometimes from loss. Sometimes from tragedy so heavy it changes everything that comes after it. This season, we’re stepping into stories about the list the people, the moments, and the pain we carry and what it really looks like to begin crossing names off one step at a time. 👣 GUEST INTRODUCTION Heather Mylan-Mains knows forgiveness is not a straight line. It’s a climb. A process built one painful, intentional step at a time. Heather often says she has a “PhD in life,” because she’s survived more hard days than she can count. Through family fractures, heartbreak, loss, and unimaginable tragedy, she discovered something life-changing: We are not defined by what happens to us… but by how we choose to respond. In this deeply honest conversation, Heather shares about surviving the trauma of her husband taking his own life by shooting himself in the head a moment that forever altered the course of her story and forced her to wrestle with grief, pain, anger, questions, and ultimately forgiveness. Rather than allowing bitterness to define her, Heather chose to begin the difficult climb toward healing. Her journey eventually led her to create a seven-step forgiveness framework rooted in faith, healing, mercy, and grace through Jesus Christ’s atonement. In this episode, Heather shares how forgiveness transformed her relationships, her outlook, and even the way she sees suffering itself. She’s the author of Unwrapping Forgiveness: The Gift of Mercy and Grace, where she openly shares her story and the lessons she learned while learning to forgive. Professionally, Heather helps organizations and teams solve complex problems with a background in accounting and an MBA but her deepest work may be helping people untangle the weight unforgiveness leaves behind. From Des Moines, Heather lives with contagious gratitude, unwavering optimism, and a belief that even the hardest moments can still become opportunities for healing. 💭 INSIGHT TO TAKE AWAY How tightly are you still holding onto unforgiveness? Is there someone whose name still lives on your list? What if forgiveness isn’t about giving control back to the person who hurt you… but finally releasing their control over you? Are you willing to make amends if the opportunity came? And what role does grace play in learning to let go? Sometimes healing doesn’t happen all at once. Sometimes it looks like a staircase. One step at a time. 🌐 CONNECT  Website: Heather Mylan-Mains Official Website Instagram: @mylanmains Book: Unwrapping Forgiveness: The Gift of Mercy and Grace 👟 OTHER PEOPLE’S SHOES Instagram 👟 Facebook 👟 X (Twitter) 👟 YouTube 👟 Website 👟 ⭐ LEAVE US A REVIEW If this episode challenged you, encouraged you, or helped you rethink forgiveness… don’t keep it to yourself. Leave a Review 👟

    44 min
  7. The Moment

    May 6

    The Moment

    🎙 THE MOMENT We all have one. A list we don’t write down. A list we don’t talk about. A list of people we just can’t seem to forgive. Maybe it’s what they said. Maybe it’s what they did. Maybe it’s what they took. And if we’re being honest… sometimes the hardest name on that list… is our own. This season, we’re stepping into stories shaped by who made the list and what it really takes to start crossing names off. 👣 GUEST INTRODUCTION Joe Chris Rodriguez knows what it feels like to have life split into two parts: Before… and after the moment. While serving in the United States Air Force, Joe Chris experienced a tragic encounter that didn’t just alter his path, it completely rewrote it. In an instant, everything changed. The future he had imagined was gone. The life he knew was no longer possible. And what followed wasn’t just physical recovery, it was a fight in the dark. A fight with pain. A fight with questions. A fight with thoughts he never thought he’d have. Joe Chris opens up about suicidal ideation… about the weight of hopelessness… and about wondering if life would ever feel worth living again. But somewhere in that darkness, something began to shift. Forgiveness isn’t always about someone else. Sometimes… It’s about learning how to live with what happened. Sometimes… It’s about facing the version of yourself you don’t recognize anymore. And today, Joe Chris is doing more than surviving; he’s helping others find their way forward. Through his nonprofit, he’s providing wheelchairs so people can compete, belong, and experience life again, not watching from the sidelines, but back in the game. One chair at a time. One life at a time. 💡 EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS The moment that changed everything, and how fast life can shift Walking through darkness and facing suicidal thoughts honestly When forgiveness feels impossible, where do you even begin? The importance of having “your person” (your 911 call) Finding hope when life no longer looks the way you planned 🔗 CONNECT WITH ONE CHAIR AT A TIME 🌐 Website 📘 Facebook 📸 Instagram 🎧 LISTEN & FOLLOW OTHER PEOPLE’S SHOES 🩵 Instagram 👍 Facebook 🐦 X (Twitter) 📺 YouTube 👟 Website 📣 LEAVE US A REVIEW If this episode made you think about your list—the names you carry, the weight you’ve been holding, or the one person you might need to forgive don’t keep it to yourself. Leave a review and let us know how this story impacted you.

    44 min
  8. Bag Of Coal

    Apr 29

    Bag Of Coal

    🎙 BAG OF COAL 🚪 All season long, we’ve been standing at the door. Hearing the knock.Asking the question.Wondering who or what is waiting on the other side. Sometimes it’s opportunity.Sometimes it’s pain.Sometimes it’s a story you never saw coming. And sometimes… it’s a place you’ve never been before. This is the season finale of the Who’s There season. The final knock. The final door. 👣 GUEST INTRODUCTION For the first time in the history of Other People’s Shoes, we’re opening the door to West Virginia. When I first started this podcast, I had a goal: sit down with someone from every state in the United States. One story at a time. One pair of shoes at a time. Now, after years of conversations… we’re down to just one state left. But before we get there… this door had to open. And behind it is Vanessa Hankins. Vanessa is the host of Tri-State Time Machine, a storytelling podcast that uncovers the history, mystery, and unforgettable people of West Virginia, Ohio, and Kentucky one era at a time. But this conversation isn’t just about where she’s from……it’s about what she’s walked through. This episode is called A Bag of Coal. Because coal, under pressure, doesn’t stay coal. It becomes something entirely different. And Vanessa’s story is full of those moments the kind that feel heavy, overlooked, maybe even discarded at first… but over time, turn into something strong, something valuable… something that shines. As we close this season, maybe the question isn’t just who’s there? Maybe it’s… what has been there all along… waiting to be transformed? 💡 EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS Opening with a familiar song that feels like coming home The first-ever visit to West Virginia in show history The original 50-state goal and being just one story away What pressure reveals about who we really are Why some of life’s heaviest moments carry hidden value The power of storytelling to connect past, present, and purpose Seeing your own “bag of coal” in a new way 🔗 CONNECT WITH VANESSA HANKINS 🎧 Podcast: Tri-State Time Machinehttps://feeds.captivate.fm/ts-time-machine/?fbclid=IwY2xjawRcxXZleHRuA2FlbQIxMABicmlkETFhV0NCR204SWJvaDBMT3Nyc3J0YwZhcHBfaWQQMjIyMDM5MTc4ODIwMDg5MgABHn72b6hRBQ55OTDW1S4Xg-xjt3Bk45iU8oru5j0hERrOHwN4B4JfEDfZAtzh_aem_CKR18phH8kzat9JLcoseLA 📸 Instagramhttps://www.instagram.com/tristatetimemachine/ 🎧 LISTEN & FOLLOW OTHER PEOPLE’S SHOES 🩵 Instagram 👍 Facebook 🐦 X (Twitter) 📺 YouTube 👟 Website 📣 LEAVE US A REVIEW If this season finale made you stop, reflect, or see your own story a little differently don’t keep that to yourself. 👉 Leave a review and let us know…

    46 min
4.9
out of 5
77 Ratings

About

On my show, I intentionally create space for every voice and every point of view to be heard. Honest, constructive conversations have a way of opening our eyes to stories we might otherwise miss. After all, when you step into Other People’s Shoes, you gain what we’re all searching for… a different perspective on life.

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