2 Pastors and a Mic

Hill City

Unfiltered, unedited, and uncommon thoughts from 2 pastors figuring it out as they go.

  1. 6D AGO

    277. 4 Signs You're Moving In The Right Direction

    In this episode of Two Pastors and a Mic, we unpack 4 signs that you’re actually moving in the right direction spiritually, emotionally, and mentally. After weeks of conversations around “Godly Thought or Trauma Response,” we wanted to answer one of the biggest questions we’ve been getting: “How do I know I’m healing?” “How do I know I’m growing?” “How do I know I’m actually becoming free?” This conversation is deeply personal as we continue navigating grief, leadership, deconstruction, healing, and learning how to live from love instead of fear. In this episode, we discuss: • Why fear is no longer our motivation • Spiritual disciplines through love instead of pressure • Vulnerability vs transparency • Healing through safe connection • How to hold tension without panic • Deconstruction, curiosity, and learning to rethink theology • Letting go of the need for approval • Finding identity rooted in love instead of performance We also share some updates about upcoming podcast episodes, interviews with Bill Vanderbush and Dr. Shawn Smith, and what’s ahead this summer for the podcast. 00:00 - Intro & Processing Grief 02:15 - Four Signs You’re Moving in the Right Direction 03:34 - Sign #1: Less Motivated by Fear 04:22 - Spiritual Disciplines Without Fear 05:01 - Fear, Hell, and Financial Freedom 06:26 - Generosity Flowing From Love 07:21 - Love Removes Fear 09:00 - Fear May Whisper, But It Doesn’t Lead 09:47 - Sign #2: Honest About Your Humanity 10:16 - Transparency vs Vulnerability 10:49 - Healing Happens When You’re Heard 11:16 - “I’m Okay, But I’m Not Okay” 12:00 - Why “How Are You?” Matters Differently in Ukrainian Culture 13:53 - Sign #3: Holding Tension Without Panic 14:16 - Deconstruction, Uncertainty & Emotional Processing 15:28 - Letting People Process at Their Own Pace 16:14 - Curiosity, Teachability & Seeing God Better 17:02 - Ted Lasso, Curiosity & Less Judgment 17:24 - Sign #4: Rooted in Love, Not Approval 17:39 - Letting Go of Needing Everyone’s Approval 18:21 - Identity as Sons & Daughters of God 19:02 - Recap: Four Signs You’re Healing & Growing 19:19 - Upcoming Podcast Guests & Summer Series 21:26 - Final Encouragement & Closing Thoughts

    22 min

  2. MAY 13

    276. Grief Comes In Waves

    This episode is different. After five years of never missing a week, we suddenly disappeared for two weeks… Two weeks ago, we lost one of our best friends — Chris Crawford — unexpectedly at just 46 years old. In this episode, we sit down not with polished answers or a sermon outline, but simply as two grieving friends trying to process heartbreak in real time. We talk honestly about: What grief actually feels like How loss comes in waves The emotional weight of showing up when you don’t want to Why presence matters more than words The tension of holding hope and heartbreak at the same time Some of the unhelpful things people say to grieving people (even with good intentions) Why we felt it was important not to just “move on” too quickly This is a conversation about friendship, loss, pain, love, and learning how to sit with grief instead of trying to fix it. If you’re grieving right now… If someone you love is grieving… Or if you simply need permission to not be okay for a while… we hope this episode reminds you that you’re not alone. More than anything, this conversation reminded us: Sometimes the most powerful thing you can do is simply show up. 00:00 - We’re Back After Tragedy 00:36 - Missing Our First Podcast Weeks in 5 Years 01:07 - Losing One of Our Best Friends 03:03 - How Grief Comes in Waves 04:36 - The Closest Loss We’ve Ever Experienced 05:19 - The Shock of Losing Chris at 46 07:11 - Writing Through Grief & Journaling 08:26 - Why Christians Struggle With Grief 08:58 - Preaching While Grieving 10:24 - Holding Hope and Heartbreak Together 11:54 - Grieving Without Easy Answers 13:14 - The Tension of Comforting People 15:13 - Presence Matters More Than Words 15:45 - A Message That Encouraged Us 18:33 - Grief, Vulnerability & Being Real 20:15 - Show Up for Someone This Week 20:50 - Never Underestimate Presence 21:43 - What’s Next for the Podcast 22:08 - Final Thoughts & Encouragement

    23 min

  3. APR 22

    275. Godly Thought Or Trauma Response - Meekness vs Self-Abandonment

    What if what you’ve been calling “meekness”... isn’t actually meekness at all? In this episode of Two Pastors and a Mic, we unpack the difference between true biblical meekness and something many of us have unknowingly lived in—self-abandonment. For years, we’ve been taught that being quiet, agreeable, and selfless is spiritual. But what if constantly apologizing, shrinking your voice, and avoiding conflict isn’t humility… it’s a trauma response? We get honest about: Why so many people struggle to speak up or set boundaries The subtle ways self-abandonment shows up (you probably do these without realizing it) The fear underneath it all—rejection, conflict, and being “too much” Why “no” is a complete sentence (and why that’s so hard for us) What meekness actually looks like through the life of Jesus This one gets personal. We share our own struggles with over-apologizing, people-pleasing, and learning to stop shrinking ourselves in relationships. If you’ve ever felt like: “I don’t want to bother anyone…” “Sorry, this might be a dumb question…” “I’ll just stay quiet to keep the peace…” …this episode is for you. Because the truth is: Meekness isn’t weakness. It’s strength under control. And you were never meant to disappear to be accepted. 00:00 - Welcome Back and Podcast Consistency 01:58 - Learning to Celebrate Yourself 02:50 - This Week’s Topic: Meekness vs. Self-Abandonment 03:43 - What Self-Abandonment Looks Like 05:11 - Channock on Feeling Meek but Being Seen as Bold 06:47 - Over-Apologizing and Shrinking Yourself 08:01 - “I Know You’re Busy” and Other Subtle Self-Abandonment Patterns 09:19 - Why “No” Should Be a Complete Sentence 10:05 - Boundaries, Family Pressure, and Over-Explaining 11:06 - Why We Struggle to Say No 12:31 - The Fear Beneath Self-Abandonment 14:23 - What Meekness Actually Is 15:12 - Strength Under Control in the Life of Jesus 16:20 - Why Self-Abandonment Feels So Hard 17:57 - A Simple Shift: Stop Starting with “Sorry” 18:43 - Meekness Does Not Mean Disappearing 19:15 - Final Encouragement to Stop Shrinking Yourself 20:34 - Reflecting on Self-Abandonment in Real Life 21:16 - You’re Loved and There’s Nothing You Can Do About It

    22 min

  4. APR 15

    274. Godly Thought Or Trauma Response - Productivity vs Rest

    In this episode of Two Pastors and a Mic, we talk about something that gets praised all the time in church culture—but often hides a much deeper issue: productivity without rest. A lot of us were taught that being busy means being faithful. That doing more means you care more. That slowing down feels lazy. That resting means you are falling behind. But what if that constant need to produce is not obedience at all? What if it is actually a trauma response? This week, Cory and Channock unpack the difference between healthy discipline and unhealthy productivity, and why so many of us have tied our worth to our output. They talk honestly about the pressure to always be doing more, the fear of being seen as lazy, the struggle to stop striving, and how rest can feel uncomfortable when your identity has been built around performance. They also share personal stories about ministry, family, work ethic, and the inner voices that make rest feel irresponsible—even when rest is exactly what is needed. In this episode: Why productivity is often praised as spirituality How performance can become tied to identity The fear of being perceived as lazy Why rest can feel uncomfortable and even unsafe How childhood and church culture shape our work habits The difference between inactivity and true rest What Jesus modeled instead of constant striving Simple practical ways to begin choosing rest without guilt This episode is for the person who feels guilty slowing down… For the one who always feels like they should be doing more… For the one who has confused exhaustion with faithfulness. Sometimes the most spiritual thing you can do is stop striving. 00:00 - Welcome Back  02:17 - Why Short-Form Theology Feels Frustrating 02:50 - Godly Thought or Trauma Response Series Recap 03:41 - Processing Last Week’s Hypervigilance Episode 05:45 - This Week’s Topic: Productivity vs. Rest 06:30 - When Busyness Gets Praised as Spirituality 07:45 - Can the Performance Bug Ever Go Away? 08:59 - What If Productivity Is a Trauma Response? 09:20 - Channock on the Fear of Being Seen as Lazy 11:27 - The Garage Door Story and Hidden Pressure 14:01 - Cory on Childhood Roots of Overworking 16:30 - When Productivity Becomes Identity 19:06 - What Rest Actually Looks Like 19:51 - Three Things Jesus Never Did 20:28 - Finding Life Outside of Productivity 21:30 - Ministry, Relife, and Protecting Family 23:50 - Rest Is Peace in the Middle of Activity 24:11 - Simple Practices to Start Resting 25:52 - Phone Boundaries and Learning Presence 26:40 - You Are Valuable Without Proving It 27:04 - Final Encouragement and Closing

    28 min

  5. APR 8

    273. Godly Thought Or Trauma Response - Hyper-Vigilance vs Discernment

    In this episode of Two Pastors and a Mic, we take on a topic that hits closer than most—and often gets misunderstood in church culture: hypervigilance. A lot of us have been taught to call it discernment. “I just feel like something’s off…” “The Holy Spirit is showing me something…” And sometimes that’s true. But other times? It’s not discernment—it’s your nervous system trying to stay safe based on past experiences. In this conversation, Cory and Channock unpack how hypervigilance develops, why it feels so spiritual, and how it can quietly sabotage your relationships, your peace, and your ability to actually be present. They also get honest about their own experiences—from leadership dynamics to marriage and insecurity—and how easy it is to mistake fear for wisdom. The goal isn’t to shame this behavior—it’s to bring awareness so you can begin to move from fear → peace, and from reaction → presence. In this episode: Why hypervigilance often gets mislabeled as discernment What hypervigilance actually looks like (overanalyzing, expecting conflict, reading into everything) The root causes: trauma, broken trust, and unsafe environments How this pattern keeps you stuck in a cycle of fear (and even victim thinking) A personal story of how past relationships can affect present ones The difference between discernment (peace) and hypervigilance (fear) A simple but powerful question: Is there actual evidence something is wrong? A grounding practice: “I’m safe right now” 00:00 - Welcome + Podcast Intro 03:33 - Series Recap: Godly Thought or Trauma Response 04:11 - Today’s Topic: Hypervigilance vs Discernment 05:10 - What Hypervigilance Really Is 05:37 - Personal Example: Church Leadership + Caution 06:42 - Hypervigilance vs Healthy Boundaries 08:34 - What Hypervigilance Looks Like Practically 09:20 - “Something Feels Off” Mentality 10:04 - The Cycle: Staying in Victim Mode 11:02 - Root Causes: Trauma, Broken Trust, Unsafe Environments 12:03 - Why It Doesn’t Just Turn Off 12:44 - When Hypervigilance Becomes Your Identity 14:17 - Calling It What It Is (Not Discernment) 15:18 - Leadership Struggles + Calling Out Insecurity 16:29 - What True Discernment Looks Like 17:37 - Peace vs Fear (Key Difference) 18:30 - The Cost of Living Hypervigilant 19:07 - The Key Question: Evidence or Assumption? 19:22 - Practical Step: “I’m Safe Right Now” 20:03 - Hypervigilance vs Presence 20:14 - Final Encouragement + Why This Matters 21:30 - Closing: You’re Loved

    22 min

  6. APR 1

    272. Godly Thought Or Trauma Response - Self-Reliance vs Shared Life

    In this episode of Two Pastors and a Mic, we tackle something that rarely gets questioned—but is often praised in church culture: self-reliance. You know the person… the one who handles everything, never asks for help, always shows up, carries the weight, and pushes through no matter what. We call them strong. Faithful. Dependable. But what if constantly carrying everything alone isn’t actually strength? What if it’s a trauma response? In this conversation, Cory and Channock unpack the deeper roots of self-reliance—how it can be driven by fear of being a burden, fear of being let down, or a deep desire to feel needed, valued, and accepted. They also get honest about their own struggles with this, from “Superman syndrome” to workaholism to the tension of expecting others to match what you give. But the heart of this episode is the shift from self-reliance to shared life—the kind of life Jesus modeled and the early church embodied through “one anothering” each other well. If you’ve ever said “I’ve got it,” when you really didn’t… this episode is for you. In this episode: Why self-reliance often gets praised as spiritual maturity The hidden roots: fear, rejection, loneliness, and control The emotional cost of carrying everything alone How self-reliance can actually block connection What Jesus modeled instead: shared life and mutual support A powerful question to ask: Am I meant to carry this alone? Practical steps to start letting people in 00:00 - Welcome + Podcast Intro 00:40 - Series Overview: Godly Thought or Trauma Response 01:35 - Today’s Topic: Self-Reliance 02:17 - Why Self-Reliance Gets Praised 02:52 - Roots of Self-Reliance (People-Pleasing, Rejection, Loneliness) 04:04 - Personal Struggle: Superman Imposter Syndrome 05:16 - The “Should” Trap + Emotional Tension 06:19 - When Others Don’t Meet Your Expectations 07:11 - Hard Question: Not Asking for Help 07:57 - Impatience + Doing It Alone 08:50 - Workaholic Tendencies + Selective Help 09:33 - “I’ve Got It” Mentality Explained 10:02 - Fear of Being a Burden or Let Down 10:40 - The Cost: Self-Reliance Blocks Connection 11:09 - Leadership Struggles + Fragilizing Others 12:05 - Growth Through Asking for Help (RElife Story) 14:12 - Why Asking for Help Is So Hard 15:01 - The Lie: Easier Doesn’t Mean Healthier 15:38 - The Shift: From Self-Reliance to Shared Life 16:25 - One Anothering: The Early Church Model 17:52 - You Were Never Meant to Do Life Alone 18:47 - Practical Step: Ask a Better Question 21:31 - Be Specific + Be Okay Hearing “No” 22:03 - Real Strength = Connection, Not Isolation 22:39 - Closing Encouragement

    23 min

  7. MAR 25

    271. Godly Thought Or Trauma Response - Peacekeeping vs Peacemaking

    In this episode of Two Pastors and a Mic, we talk about the difference between peacekeeping and peacemaking—and why those two things are not the same. A lot of us were taught that being “nice,” avoiding conflict, staying quiet, and keeping everyone comfortable was the godly way. But what if that’s not actually peace? What if it’s a trauma response dressed up as spirituality? We unpack how peacekeeping is often rooted in fear—fear of rejection, fear of conflict, fear of being misunderstood, fear of losing connection—and how it can slowly cause you to abandon your own voice, needs, and boundaries. Then we contrast that with the way of Jesus, who didn’t avoid tension, but entered it with truth, love, and a desire for restoration. If you’ve ever found yourself shrinking, avoiding hard conversations, or carrying the emotional burden of keeping everyone else okay, this conversation is for you. In this episode, we cover: The difference between peacekeeping and peacemaking Why peacekeeping often looks spiritual How fear drives conflict avoidance What Jesus modeled instead How to confront without escalating 4 practical steps toward real peacemaking 00:00 - Welcome + YouTube Growth & Appreciation 01:03 - Why This Podcast Matters Right Now 01:43 - Series Intro: Godly Thought or Trauma Response 03:00 - Today’s Topic: Peacekeeping vs Peacemaking 03:40 - What Jesus Meant by Peacemakers (Not Peacekeepers) 04:11 - Signs of Peacekeeping (People-Pleasing & Avoidance) 05:02 - Why Peacekeeping Gets Praised 05:50 - Fear at the Root of Peacekeeping 06:40 - How Peacekeeping Makes You Disappear 07:32 - Real-Life Example: Family Tension & Boundaries 08:36 - Leadership Struggles: Avoiding Hard Conversations 09:45 - Fragilizing: Walking on Eggshells 10:29 - Self-Perception vs How Others See You 11:39 - Fear of Hurting Others vs Fear of Losing Connection 12:44 - Why Fragilizing Hurts Growth 13:59 - Tension: When to Confront vs When Not To 15:13 - Jesus Example: Confronting Without Escalating 16:03 - What True Peacemaking Looks Like 16:48 - Peacekeepers vs Peacemakers (Clear Differences) 17:39 - Why This Leads to Healing (Not Just Harmony) 17:59 - Practical Steps to Become a Peacemaker 19:09 - Step 1: Admit Specifics 19:34 - Step 2: Avoid Excuses 20:00 - Step 3: Accept Consequences 20:18 - Step 4: Ask for Forgiveness 20:53 - Closing + Next Episode Teaser

    21 min

  8. MAR 18

    270. Godly Thought Or Trauma Response - False Humility vs Worthiness

    In this episode of Two Pastors and a Mic, we kick off our new series asking a powerful question: Is this a godly thought… or a trauma response? And we start with one of the most common (and sneaky) ones in church culture: false humility. For many of us, what we’ve called “humility” is actually self-rejection. We’ve been trained to downplay our gifts, deflect compliments, and avoid affirmation—all in the name of being “spiritual.” But what if that’s not humility at all? What if it’s insecurity… fear… or even internalized shame? In this episode, we unpack where false humility comes from, why it feels safe, and how it may actually be robbing you of confidence, identity, and freedom... Why deflecting compliments isn’t humility How church culture often trains us to think less of ourselves The difference between humility and self-rejection Why false humility can disconnect you from your identity What Jesus actually modeled (confidence, security, and truth) A simple practice to begin breaking this pattern: just say “thank you” If you’ve ever struggled to receive affirmation, celebrate yourself, or believe good things about who you are… this conversation will hit close to home. 00:00 - Welcome + Podcast Intro 01:31 - Hill City Invite + New Galatians Series 01:52 - Deflecting Compliments (Real-Time Example) 02:07 - New Series: Godly Thought or Trauma Response? 03:27 - Why These Patterns Look Spiritual 04:08 - Topic: False Humility vs Worthiness 05:00 - Why We Deflect Compliments 06:09 - What We Were Taught About Humility 07:12 - You Are Worthy (Reframing Identity) 08:34 - Pendulum Swing: Pride vs Self-Rejection 09:16 - False Humility Robs Confidence 09:50 - Church Teachings That Shape Low Self-Worth 11:03 - Internalized Shame Disguised as Humility 12:14 - Jesus Restores Identity, Not Self-Hate 14:28 - What’s Underneath? (Counseling Lens) 15:10 - Fear of Disappointment + Staying Small 16:19 - What True Humility Actually Is 18:33 - Affirmation Builds Security, Not Pride 19:18 - Learning to Celebrate Yourself 20:04 - Why False Humility Feels Safe 20:55 - Simple Practice: Just Say “Thank You” 22:00 - Letting Goodness Land Internally 22:50 - Final Encouragement + Closing

    24 min
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4.8
out of 5
139 Ratings

About

Unfiltered, unedited, and uncommon thoughts from 2 pastors figuring it out as they go.

Information

  • Creator
    Hill City
  • Years Active
    2021 - 2026
  • Episodes
    278
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © 2026 2 Pastors and a Mic
  • Show Website
    2 Pastors and a Mic

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