The Mentally ill Mentor

David Grant Miller
  • 5.0 (1)
  • Mental Health
  • Updated Weekly

Welcome to The Mentally ill Mentor — the podcast that's revolutionizing the way the world thinks about and deals with mental health. Hosted by self-help author and mental health advocate David Grant Miller, this show is built on a simple promise: if you want to lose mental weight, build mental muscle, and crush anxiety, depression, self-harm, and thoughts of suicide, you can come here every week to get the personal training you need from someone who knows how you feel. Dave is a mental health speaker, coach, and author of The Mentally ill Mentor. A husband of 25+ years and father of 7, he's de

  1. 2d ago

    79. Brene Brown and Shame: The Root of Anxiety, Depression, Self Harm and Thoughts of Suicide

    In this episode, Dave shares his own experience with shame — and why he has come to see it as the root underneath so many mental health struggles, including anxiety, depression, and even thoughts of suicide. Drawing on Brené Brown’s research, he walks through the 5 W’s of shame: Who feels it, What it actually is, When it shows up, Where it lives, and Why it is so damaging. Then he gets practical about How to move through it without letting it define who you are. The most important distinction in this episode is simple and easy to miss. Guilt says, “I did something bad.” Shame says, “I am bad.” Guilt is about behavior and can lead to repair. Shame is about identity, and it usually makes people hide, disappear, or lash out. Topics covered: Why shame is a universal human experience — and who tends to carry more of itThe difference between shame and guilt, and why that difference matters for mental healthWhen shame shows up: failure, rejection, exposure, mental health, money, body image, parenting, and addictionBrené Brown’s finding that shame grows in secrecy, silence, and judgment — and dies in empathyResearch linking shame to depression, social anxiety, self-harm, and suicidal thinkingA clip from Brené Brown’s TED Talk, “Listening to Shame”Practical shame resilience: name it, speak it to the right person, separate identity from behavior, and offer yourself the same empathy you’d give a friendThis week’s challenge: tell one trusted person one thing you’ve been carrying shame about, and notice what happens to the weight of it If shame in your life is tied to thoughts of self-harm or suicide, this episode is not a substitute for real help. Reach out to a professional or a crisis line. In the U.S. and Canada, you can call or text 988. The goal here is not a shame-free life. It is refusing to let shame keep operating in silence. Resources mentioned: Brené Brown TED Talk, “Listening to Shame”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=psN1DORYYV0The Mentally Ill Mentor by Dave Miller: https://www.amazon.com/Mentally-Ill-Mentor-Principles-Maintaining/dp/148105869X If you’ve ever walked away from a mistake thinking “I’m the problem,” this episode will help you name what’s actually happening — and give you a way to put the shame down.

  2. Sep 3

    78. How to Beat Self-Sabotage: The 5 W's of Why We Get in Our Own Way

    In this episode, Dave dives into self-sabotage, why we sometimes undermine ourselves right when things are going well, using the 5 W's framework: Who, What, When, Where, and Why, plus How to actually break the pattern. He draws on research, Tony Robbins' teachings on identity, and Jamie Kern Lima's work on self-worth to answer a question a lot of people quietly wonder about themselves: does this come down to feeling unworthy of success? Topics covered: Dave's own honest experience with self-sabotaging when things are going wellWho self-sabotage affects, and why it's far more common than people realizeWhat self-sabotage actually looks like across career, relationships, and healthWhy it often shows up right at the edge of success, not just during failureThe psychology behind fear of success, fear of failure, and self-verification theoryTony Robbins on identity, and Jamie Kern Lima on the difference between self-confidence and self-worthPractical, research-backed steps to actually break the cycleA challenge to catch the pattern in real time and do the oppositeIf you've ever wondered why you pull back right when things start going well, this episode gets to the root of it.

  3. Aug 28

    77. Doomscrolling and News Anxiety: Why I Stay Away From the News

    In this episode, Dave shares his own honest struggle with staying away from the news, including a recent story about flooding in Nepal that pulled him back in, and the simple question he asks himself afterward every time. He dives into the research on doomscrolling and news anxiety, why it's become one of the most common mental health struggles today, and what psychologists actually recommend. Topics covered: Dave's personal approach to limiting news consumption and why it works for himGlobal doomscrolling statistics, and why news avoidance is at an all-time highThe psychological loop that makes checking the news backfire on anxietyResearch on how powerlessness makes distressing news even harder to processExpert-recommended time limits for healthy news consumptionA challenge to set a news time limit this week and notice how it feelsIf you've ever felt guilty for stepping away from the news, this episode will make you feel a lot less alone, and give you research-backed permission to do it.

  4. Aug 20

    76. Anxiety, Sleep, and Exercise: How I Learned to Calm My Panic

    In this episode, Dave shares a vulnerable personal story from about 10 years ago, a panic attack he experienced in a Costco, and reflects on how far he's come since then. He breaks down the three tools that have made the biggest difference in managing his own anxiety: exercise, sleep, and meditation, backed by current research on how each one works in the brain and body. Topics covered: Dave's personal story of a panic attack and what's changed since thenResearch on how exercise and sleep quality work together to reduce anxietyThe connection between consistent movement and better sleepHow meditation reduces amygdala reactivity and supports emotional regulationBill Hader's experience with anxiety and Transcendental MeditationA challenge to build consistency in exercise, sleep, or meditation this weekIf you've ever felt anxiety take hold in an unexpected moment, this episode offers real, practical, research-backed ways to find your calm again.

  5. Aug 13

    75. Meditation and Temper Control: How I Stopped Yelling at My Kids

    In this episode, Dave shares a personal experience that brought up old memories from his own childhood, and reflects on how meditation transformed his own temper as a parent. He dives into the research on mindfulness and anger, from brain changes to a major 2025 meta-analysis, and makes the case for meditation as an underused tool for anger and emotional regulation. Topics covered: Dave's personal story and how it connected to memories from his own upbringingWhy anger and temper control deserve more attention in mental health conversationsResearch on cortisol, brain structure, and anger reduction through meditationA major 2025 meta-analysis on mindfulness, anger, and aggression across 118 studiesHow Transcendental Meditation specifically supports emotional regulationA challenge to build a daily meditation practice and notice the shift in reaction timeIf you've ever wished you could catch your temper before it catches you, this episode offers real, research-backed hope.

  6. Aug 7

    74. The Neuroscience of Meditation: How It Physically Changes Your Brain

    In this episode, Dave shares his own 8 year meditation journey, from starting with the Calm app to practicing Transcendental Meditation today. He dives into the neuroscience behind meditation, how it physically reshapes the amygdala, quiets the brain's rumination network, and even changes how monks experience emotional pain, backed by real brain-imaging research. Topics covered: Dave's personal meditation journey and how his practice has evolvedHow meditation changes the amygdala, the brain's fear and stress centerThe default mode network and its link to rumination, anxiety, and depressionResearch on Buddhist monks and reduced emotional pain during meditationInsights from neuroscientist Dr. Andrew Huberman on different meditation stylesThe top five meditation apps to tryA challenge to build a consistent 10 to 20 minute daily practiceIf you've ever wondered what's actually happening in your brain when you meditate, this episode breaks down the science.

  7. Jul 30

    73. AI Therapist: Can ChatGPT, Claude, or Grok Actually Help Your Mental Health?

    In this episode, Dave shares his own experience turning to Grok for what he expected to be a quick check-in, and ended up in a long, unexpectedly therapeutic conversation. He breaks down why it felt safe, validating, and impartial, and dives into the research on whether AI chatbots can genuinely help with mental health or whether they're a hazard to be cautious of. Topics covered: Dave's personal experience using Grok as a thinking and processing toolWhy AI redirected him to a real therapist when he tried to push its boundariesResearch comparing licensed therapists to AI chatbots on clinical standardsWhat psychologists are reporting about patients using AI alongside therapyGrok's own response explaining the line between a support tool and real therapyA challenge to try an honest conversation with AI as a thought-organizing toolIf you've ever wondered whether talking to AI about your mental health is helpful or risky, this episode gives you both sides.

  8. Jul 23

    72. Screen Time, Social Media, and the Mental Health of Our Teens

    In this episode, Dave shares his own experience as a parent navigating screen time with his kids, from raising his now-adult children to parenting teens today, and why the struggle has only gotten harder despite more parenting experience. He dives into Jonathan Haidt's book The Anxious Generation and the research behind the sharp rise in teen anxiety, depression, and suicide since smartphones and social media went mainstream. Topics covered: Dave's personal experience parenting kids through the shift from TV time to constant connectivityResearch on the rise in teen depression, anxiety, and suicide rates since 2010Jonathan Haidt's four norms for reversing the trendWhy free play and real-world independence matter more than everA challenge to bring more screen-free play into your family's weekIf you've ever wondered why parenting around screens feels harder than it used to, this episode is for you.

See All (78)

Ratings & Reviews

About

Welcome to The Mentally ill Mentor — the podcast that's revolutionizing the way the world thinks about and deals with mental health. Hosted by self-help author and mental health advocate David Grant Miller, this show is built on a simple promise: if you want to lose mental weight, build mental muscle, and crush anxiety, depression, self-harm, and thoughts of suicide, you can come here every week to get the personal training you need from someone who knows how you feel. Dave is a mental health speaker, coach, and author of The Mentally ill Mentor. A husband of 25+ years and father of 7, he's de

Information

  • Creator
    David Grant Miller
  • Years Active
    2021 - 2026
  • Episodes
    78
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © David Grant Miller
  • Show Website
    The Mentally ill Mentor