The Mentally ill Mentor

David Grant Miller
  • 5.0 (1)
  • Mental Health
  • Weekly

Welcome to The Mentally ill Mentor — the podcast that's revolutionizing the way the world thinks about and deals with mental health. Hosted by self-help author and mental health advocate David Grant Miller, this show is built on a simple promise: if you want to lose mental weight, build mental muscle, and crush anxiety, depression, self-harm, and thoughts of suicide, you can come here every week to get the personal training you need from someone who knows how you feel. Dave is a mental health speaker, coach, and author of The Mentally ill Mentor. A husband of 25+ years and father of 7, he's de

  1. 3d ago

    87. What Happens When You Bottle Up Your Emotions? The Mental Health Cost

    Bottling up emotions means habitually inhibiting what you feel instead of expressing it. Research links this pattern, known clinically as expressive suppression, to greater depression and anxiety over time. In this episode, Dave Miller shares three recent experiences that changed how he handles his own emotions, and plays a clip from clinical psychologist Dr. Julie Smith. What happens when you bottle up your emotions? A 2026 longitudinal study found habitual expressive suppression predicted greater depression and anxiety symptoms over time. A study in the Journal of Counseling Psychology tracked people across 14 weeks and found those inhibiting emotional expression were less content with life and reported more anxiety and depression at follow-up. Does bottling up emotions affect happiness too? Yes. A systematic review of 41 studies and over 11,000 participants found a consistent negative relationship between expressive suppression and positive emotion. As Dr. Julie Smith explains, blocking negative emotions means blocking all emotion, including joy, pleasure, and love. Why is bottling up emotions so exhausting? A 2026 meta-analysis in Neuroscience and Biobehavioral Reviews described suppression as a brake-and-accelerator conflict in the brain. The emotional system presses the gas while the control system brakes simultaneously. Researchers call it neuronally inefficient — it burns real cognitive resources. What actually makes suppression harmful? Research points to ambivalence over emotional expression — an internal tug-of-war where you want to speak and something stops you. People who held back and felt genuinely authentic doing so did not show the same negative effects. Topics covered: How daily voice journaling with an AI app unexpectedly brought Dave Miller’s emotions back into a normal rangeWhy a first counseling appointment in two years offered something an app could notThe value of honest conversation with a peer who has faced similar mental health challengesDr. Julie Smith on why blocking difficult emotions blocks the good ones tooCurrent research on expressive suppression, depression, and anxietyThe neuroscience of why holding it in is physically drainingWhy ambivalence, not silence, is the real problemA challenge to pick one held-in feeling and one outlet this weekHow do you stop bottling up emotions? You likely need more than one outlet, because each does different work. An AI journaling app is available anytime, a trained counselor offers perspective you cannot reach alone, and a peer who understands lets you be vulnerable without translating. Dave uses all three.

  2. Oct 29

    86. Why Am I So Easily Triggered? Advice from Emma McAdam of Therapy in a Nutshell on Trauma Triggers

    A trauma trigger is a sensory cue — a place, a sound, a person, a moment — that activates the brain’s alarm system before your rational mind can intervene. Research shows that when an event is severe enough, this fear response can be conditioned in a single pairing. In this episode, Dave Miller shares his own trigger experience and plays nearly the full video from Emma McAdam, LMFT, of Therapy in a Nutshell. Why am I so easily triggered? Trauma triggers aren’t weakness or oversensitivity. They’re a learned association. Brain imaging studies show the amygdala, the brain’s alarm system, becomes hyper-responsive to trauma cues, while the prefrontal cortex — the part that would reason with you — goes under-active in that moment. Why doesn’t knowing it’s irrational help? Because your thinking brain and your alarm system are different systems. Dave describes standing in a Costco as a 40-something-year-old man, feeling like a six-year-old who’d lost his mother, fully aware it made no sense, and finding that awareness changed nothing about the feeling. Does avoiding triggers help or hurt? It hurts. Harvard clinical psychologist Richard McNally states plainly that avoiding reminders of trauma maintains PTSD rather than treating it. Long-term avoidance of triggers increases the likelihood of developing a disabling level of PTSD. Does facing trauma triggers actually work? A five-year follow-up study published in October 2026 found people maintained significant PTSD symptom reductions for 60 months after an average of just nine sessions of prolonged exposure. A systematic review in the Journal of Affective Disorders found roughly one in four people treated with exposure-based therapy no longer meets criteria for PTSD at all. Topics covered: Dave Miller’s Costco trauma trigger and why logic couldn’t touch itEmma McAdam of Therapy in a Nutshell on how to stop being triggeredFear conditioning, Pavlov, and why one event can wire a lifelong triggerWhat brain imaging shows about the amygdala during a triggerWhy avoidance maintains PTSD instead of relieving itThree recent studies on exposure therapy outcomesWhy a graduated approach produces less distress than confronting the worst memory firstA challenge to name one trigger and write down the gap between your reaction and the actual situationShould you work on trauma triggers alone? Gradual exposure approaches are clinical work and are typically done with a trained therapist. If triggers are significantly affecting your daily life, professional support matters. This episode is a starting point, not a treatment plan.

  3. Oct 22

    85. What Are Trauma Triggers and How Does the “What If” Game Help (with Emma McAdam)

    Trauma triggers are sensory cues — a place, a sound, a person, a drive you’ve made a hundred times — that activate the brain’s threat system before you consciously register anything is wrong. In this episode, Dave Miller explains why ordinary moments shift your energy, and walks through the “What If” exercise from therapist Emma McAdam of Therapy in a Nutshell. What is hypervigilance? Hypervigilance is when the brain and body stay stuck in high-alert mode, scanning for danger long after a threat has passed. Emma McAdam, LMFT, compares it to a smoke alarm that’s too sensitive: it goes off not just for fires, but for toast. The goal isn’t removing the alarm, it’s retraining it. Why do places and sounds trigger a trauma response? Brain imaging research shows the amygdala becomes hyper-responsive to trauma-related cues. Traumatic memories are stored in a fragmented, heavily sensory way, so a cue can pull up the emotional charge of a memory without the context that would tell your brain “that was then, not now.” What is the “What If” game? It’s an exercise where you follow a worry to its end by asking “then what?” after every answer, until you reach the bottom and find you’d survive. Clinically this is the downward arrow technique, developed by Aaron Beck, founder of cognitive behavioral therapy. Does it actually work for anxiety? A Bayesian network meta-analysis of 56 studies and 4,388 participants found the top-performing CBT protocol for generalized anxiety disorder was built around tolerating uncertainty and confronting core fears. In real-world outpatient clinics, 80 percent of CBT patients show reliable improvement in worry. Topics covered: How Dave Miller recognized everyday trauma triggers in his own lifeWhat hypervigilance is and how it shows up day to dayThe neuroscience of why sensory cues activate the amygdalaA four-question drill for recognizing a trigger in the momentThe downward arrow technique and decatastrophizing in CBTWhy intolerance of uncertainty drives the “what if” loopEmma McAdam’s question about whether worry secretly feels protectiveA two-part challenge to track your triggers and run the exercise on paper Should you do the “What If” exercise alone? Emma McAdam recommends doing it with a therapist, or at minimum written down on paper. Done only in your head, it can turn into a spiral instead of reaching the floor. Writing it down keeps you moving toward “I would survive” rather than looping.

  4. Oct 15

    84. Does the Vagus Nerve Exercise "Voo Breath" Reduce Anxiety?

    The vagus nerve is the body's main pathway for calming the nervous system after stress, and a simple breathing exercise called the Voo breath, or foghorn breath, is one of the fastest ways to activate it. In this episode, Dave Miller breaks down what the vagus nerve is, what the research shows, and walks through this exercise himself. What is the vagus nerve? It's the longest cranial nerve in the body, running from the brainstem through the neck, chest, and abdomen. It's the main highway of the parasympathetic nervous system, the body's natural counterbalance to fight-or-flight. Does vagus nerve stimulation reduce anxiety? A 2025 randomized controlled trial found 4 weeks of vagus nerve stimulation significantly reduced stress, anxiety, and depression while increasing confidence. A 2026 study found 3 months of stimulation reduced stress symptoms by 31 percent compared to a control group. What is the Voo breath? Developed by trauma expert Dr. Peter Levine, the Voo breath is a simple exercise: breathe in deeply, then exhale with a long, low "voo" sound. The vibration stimulates the vagus nerve through the vocal cords, activating the body's calming response. Why does chanting and singing calm the nervous system? Research on Om chanting found it stimulates the vagus nerve through vibration, increases heart rate variability, and produces brain activity patterns similar to clinical vagus nerve stimulation treatments for depression. Topics covered: Dave Miller's personal experience with anxiety and what it feels like in the bodyWhat the vagus nerve is and how it regulates the nervous systemCurrent research on vagus nerve stimulation and anxietyHow to do the Voo breath, or foghorn breath, exerciseWhy religious chanting and singing may work through the same mechanismInsights from Dr. Stephen Porges, creator of Polyvagal TheoryA challenge to try the Voo breath and see if you can keep a straight faceIf you've ever wondered whether a weird breathing exercise could actually calm your nervous system, this episode makes the case with research, and a demonstration that might make you laugh.

  5. Oct 8

    83. Does Walking Every Day Reduce Anxiety and Depression? What the Research Shows

    Walking every day can reduce anxiety by lowering cortisol, releasing endorphins and serotonin, and activating the parasympathetic nervous system, the body's natural calming response. In this episode, Dave Miller explains the connection between daily walking and anxiety, drawing on his own experience and current research. Does walking reduce anxiety? Research shows exercise, including walking, is an evidence-based intervention for reducing both depression and anxiety. A 2026 study published in the journal Psychiatry found anxiety scores dropped significantly immediately after exercise sessions, regardless of age, sex, or diagnosis. Does consistency matter more than intensity? Yes. The same 2026 study found a clear dose-response relationship: the more walking, stretching, or breathing sessions people completed, the larger their reduction in anxiety. A 2026 Bayesian network meta-analysis found walking and jogging reduced anxiety symptoms as effectively as resistance training and general aerobic exercise. How long does a walk need to be to help anxiety? A 2026 study in Anxiety, Stress, and Coping found a single walk reduced state anxiety, with effects still measurable 20 minutes afterward. Even 10 to 15 minutes of walking can improve mood, and walking outdoors adds extra benefit, with research showing greater reductions in anxiety, anger, and fatigue compared to indoor exercise. Topics covered: Dave Miller's daily power walking routine and its connection to his own anxiety levelsCurrent research on walking, exercise, and anxiety reductionWhy consistency matters more than intensity for anxiety reliefThe physiological mechanisms behind why walking calms the nervous systemA daily walking challenge to track anxiety before and afterIf you've ever wondered whether a simple daily walk could actually reduce anxiety, this episode answers that question with current research.

  6. Oct 1

    82. Is Depression a Metabolic Problem? Dr. Chris Palmer, Insulin Resistance, and Mental Health

    Depression and anxiety may be more connected to metabolism than most people realize. In this episode, Dave breaks down metabolic psychiatry, the emerging field connecting insulin resistance, ketosis, and brain health, and shares his own experience with intermittent fasting that led him to this research. Drawing on Harvard psychiatrist Dr. Chris Palmer's work and the nonprofit Metabolic Mind, Dave covers what recent clinical studies actually show. Topics covered: Dave's personal intermittent fasting routine and the blood sugar shifts he noticed Dr. Chris Palmer's Brain Energy theory: why mental disorders may be metabolic disorders of the brain Research showing people with insulin resistance are twice as likely to develop major depression A 2025 JAMA Psychiatry meta-analysis on ketogenic diets, depression, and anxiety A 12-week study showing a 62 percent reduction in depression scores using ketogenic metabolic therapy Why children with insulin resistance are 5 times more likely to have a mental illness A challenge to notice how your own blood sugar affects your mood and mental clarity If you've ever wondered whether what you eat is connected to how you feel mentally, this episode lays out the research.

  7. Sep 24

    81. The Everkind App Review: An AI Mental Health Journal I Actually Recommend

    In this episode, Dave reviews Everkind, an AI-powered journaling and emotional wellness app he's been using personally, and explains why it's become one of his go-to tools between therapy appointments or when he simply needs to feel heard. He covers the company's origin story, the research on why AI validation can feel genuinely comforting, and a pricing tip worth knowing before you subscribe. Topics covered: Dave's personal experience using Everkind and why he recommends itThe company behind the app, its founder, and why it was builtCurrent app statistics, ratings, and growthNew research on why AI emotional support can feel just as validating as human supportThe important limits of AI as a mental health toolA pricing tip for anyone considering the subscriptionA challenge to try the free trial and notice what you learn about yourselfIf you've ever wished for a mental health check-in tool that's available at 2am with no waitlist, this episode walks through one that might be worth trying.

  8. Sep 17

    80. Daily Affirmations and Gratitude: The Mental Health Practice I Didn't Expect

    In this episode, Dave shares how a real estate mindset practice called Ninja Selling turned into one of his most powerful mental health tools: writing 5 daily gratitudes and 25 affirmations by hand every day. He breaks down the surprising neuroscience behind why handwriting works better than typing, what the research says about gratitude and mental health, and why he can literally feel his mood dip on the days he skips it. Topics covered: Dave's personal Ninja Selling practice and how he applied it to mental healthWhy writing by hand activates the brain differently than typingResearch linking gratitude journaling to reduced depression, anxiety, and stressWhat the science says about affirmations and when they actually workOprah Winfrey's decades-long gratitude journal practice, including the time she let it slipA challenge to try 5 gratitudes and daily affirmations, by hand, for one weekIf you've ever wondered whether a simple daily habit could actually move the needle on your mental health, this episode makes the case, backed by research and Dave's own experience.

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About

Welcome to The Mentally ill Mentor — the podcast that's revolutionizing the way the world thinks about and deals with mental health. Hosted by self-help author and mental health advocate David Grant Miller, this show is built on a simple promise: if you want to lose mental weight, build mental muscle, and crush anxiety, depression, self-harm, and thoughts of suicide, you can come here every week to get the personal training you need from someone who knows how you feel. Dave is a mental health speaker, coach, and author of The Mentally ill Mentor. A husband of 25+ years and father of 7, he's de

Information

  • Creator
    David Grant Miller
  • Years Active
    2021 - 2026
  • Episodes
    86
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © David Grant Miller
  • Show Website
    The Mentally ill Mentor