Respect Circles - The Podcast Stephanie Colegrove, Alpheaus Johnson

From the beginning, our mission with Respect Circles has been to foster open communication, learning, and respectful dialogue. We’ve referenced the importance of deliberate listening, and we’ve specifically mentioned a popular past episode of Respect Circles about this subject. That’s why we thought it would be timely to present a special encore of that episode on becoming a deliberate listener, for listeners who haven’t yet heard that discussion, or as a refresher for long-time listeners to deepen their learning.
Deliberate listening can dramatically improve the quality of our conversations and, in turn, our personal and professional relationships. In this episode, we discuss the importance of becoming a better listener, because so often we jump to our own biases and form judgments before truly processing what the other person is saying. What might be possible if we just listened more? Let’s find out! 
Don’t forget to follow us on Instagram and Facebook, and thank you for leaving a review on your favorite podcast platform to let us know what you’re enjoying about this show. You can also go to https://www.respectcircles.com/voicemail/ to leave us a message, or by email, respectcircles@gmail.com. 
In this episode you’ll hear: 
Personal experiences we have both had where we noticed a lack of listening taking place [6:53]
A big lesson about learning that AJ has learned along the way [13:05]
Tips for how we can all become better listeners [15:42]
Specific questions to ask yourself to assess whether you area good listener [16:30]
What the 3 levels of listening are, and why they’re all important to be aware of [17:17]
The tremendous gift that deliberate listening can give you [23:11]
Why slowing down is such a powerful tool in the listening process [27:08]
Self-assessments of our own listening skills [30:32]


Links & Resources: 
The Power of Deliberate Listening | Ronnie Polaneczky | TEDxPhiladelphia
Three Levels of Listening - Co-Active Coaching: Henry Kmsey-House, Karen Kimsey-House, Phillip Sandhal, and Laura Whitworth, authors.  https://amzn.to/3mG7RDd
Theory U: Levels of Listening:  Otto Scharmer, author.
https://amzn.to/2WXTx00
Be a Better Listener - Assess Yourself:  https://bit.ly/3DvSKD5
 

In our last episode, we looked back at some of our most impactful conversations and we talked about how we can put what we have learned into action. At the time we were recording, another school shooting had just occurred in Nashville, Tennessee, where three 9-year old children and three teachers were killed. We shared our frustration at the escalation of gun violence here in the United States, and the apparent lack of action to change it.
In this episode, we decided to call B.S. on the complacency and lack of real action on this critical issue.  The solutions should be common sense, as this is really about saving lives, and yet the country is more divided than ever. We all have to be a part of the public outcry for real change, right now, and in this episode, we explore how we can do just that.  We also provide some helpful information in the links below. 
Don’t forget to follow us on Instagram and Facebook, and thank you for leaving a review on your favorite podcast platform to let us know what you’re enjoying about this show. You can also go to https://www.respectcircles.com/voicemail/ to leave us a message, or by email, respectcircles@gmail.com. 
In this episode you’ll hear:
Our opinions on gun control in light of the recent events in this country [3:42] 
The bigger picture to focus on when it comes to gun control legislation [9:38]
A video that brought together both sides of the gun issue and how it can help show us where we can go from here [17:25] 
The role that Hollywood and video games play in the infatuation that Americans have with guns and gun culture [18:22]
What we are seeing being put in place as the trends turn to better gun legislation [23:29] 
How you can reach your elected officials and let your stance be known right now [32:47]
Introducing our Models of Respect for this week [36:10]


Links & Resources: 
50: Celebrating 50! 
In Britain, it took just one school shooting to pass major gun control (NPR)
YouTube: Pro-Gun Vs. Anti-Gun: Is There Middle Ground?
These are the gun control laws passed in 2022 (CNN)
2023 Everytown Gun Law Rankings
Permitless Carry States:
https://www.handgunlaw.us/documents/Permitless_Carry_States.pdf
Washington Post - The Destructive Power of an AR-15 
Angel Reese
Janie's Life-Changing Bakery
 

It’s the 50th episode of Respect Circles, and we’re excited to take this opportunity to celebrate all the great conversations and guests we’ve had on the podcast the last year and a half!  In this episode, we reflect upon some of our most meaningful lessons and share what we hope to carry forward from our learning. 
We want to thank each of you who has listened, subscribed and shared our podcast, and provided feedback and encouragement along the way.  We’re looking forward to all the good that is possible as we continue to grow and expand our reach.  
Don’t forget to follow us on Instagram and Facebook, and thank you for leaving a review on your favorite podcast platform to let us know what you’re enjoying about this show. You can also go to https://www.respectcircles.com/voicemail/ to leave us a message, or by email, respectcircles@gmail.com.
In this episode you’ll hear: 
AJ’s take on the first 50 episodes of Respect Circles [7:13]
The one episode that really showed us what is possible [8:08]
AJ’s retirement plans and this relates to our episode on climbing our second mountain [10:29]
A specific episode he views as a gift and that gave us a whole new perspective on the Jewish experience [13:06]
The episode that really got AJ thinking about what’s fair versus what’s acceptable [14:08]
Why the episodes on listening are some of Stephanie’s favorites [16:13] 
A topic that has really challenged our thinking, and some possible solutions for what can be done about it right now [18:47]
Introducing our Models of Respect for this week [30:56] 
 
Links & Resources: 
31: The CROWN Act: I Am More Than My Hair 
36: Climbing Your Second Mountain: Creating Joy and Leaving a Legacy In the Second Half of Your Life 
5: Spotlight on Resilience: How Dziko Singleton is Paying It Forward
25: The Jewish Experience: Why is Anti-Semitism On the Rise?
27: Fair and Inclusive Athletic Competition: Competing As a Trans Athlete 
7: Becoming A Deliberate Listener 
47: Survival & Forgiveness: Powerful Lessons with Dylan Pryor & Cory Spain 
48: Connecting Across Our Differences 
Harnarayan Singh (Canadian Sports Announcer)
'Not even our husbands knew!' The women who have been secretly delivering cakes to underprivileged families for over 30 YEARS (The 9 Nanas)
 

When we think about the documents that have framed and influenced our nation, there are few that are more important than The Declaration of Independence. While there were a number of edits and updates made to Jefferson’s original version, one thing that remained constant or consistent throughout were the rights that were given to all Americans for things like life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. 
For many years, researchers have studied the meaning of happiness, which has provided valuable clues to what it takes to live happy and healthy lives. Most recently however, reports have shown that we’ve hit a 50-year low as a nation, which is why we wanted to look at this topic, the pursuit of happiness, on the podcast today.
We want this episode to be a reminder for all of us to enjoy the ride that is this life, be present in the moment, and allow happiness to flow into our lives. 
Don’t forget to follow us on Instagram and Facebook, and we’d really appreciate you subscribing and leaving a review on your favorite podcast platform to let us know what you’re enjoying about this show. You can also go to https://www.respectcircles.com/voicemail/ to leave us a message and you can also reach us by email, respectcircles@gmail.com to give us your thoughts. 
In this episode you’ll hear: 
Our take on whether relationships and community are the keys to a happy life, and an important distinction to make between happiness and joy [3:43]
Why we think people are so unhappy right now [9:40] 
AJ’s personal experience with a job that he thought was going to make him happy, and what he would do differently if he could do it over again [12:06]
The critical role that expectations play when it comes to happiness, and what are the external influences behind these expectations [16:20] 
Our tips and what we really want you to understand about the pursuit of happiness [24:53]
Introducing our Models of Respect for this week [31:15]


Links & Resources: 
The secret to happiness? Here’s some advice from the longest-running study on happiness
How to Find Happiness (Psychology Today) 
Americans Offer Gloomy State of the Nation Report (Gallup)
48: Connecting Across Our Differences 
Richard Williams & LaVar Ball
Jason Arday Was Diagnosed With Autism As A Child And Will Now Be The Youngest Black Professor At The University Of Cambridge

In this episode, join us as we explore the cultural divide in our country and discuss what it means to be proud of who you are and where you come from.  What do you hear when someone says they are proud to be black?  And how does the meaning change if they are proud to be white?  
What’s possible if we learn to connect across our differences?  This concept is an important part of our mission here at Respect Circles, and in this episode we deepen  the discussion about the ‘whys’ behind the cultural divide and keep looking for ways to foster respect and dignity for everyone, everywhere.
Don’t forget to follow us on Instagram and Facebook, and we’d really appreciate you subscribing and leaving a review on your favorite podcast platform to let us know what you’re enjoying about this show. You can also go to https://www.respectcircles.com/voicemail/ to leave us a message and you can also reach us by email, respectcircles@gmail.com to give us your thoughts. 
In this episode you’ll hear:
Stephanie reads a powerful paragraph from a book that inspired today’s topic and episode [1:53] 
How we would describe what a culture war is, some historical background and what researchers are saying about it [3:21] 
An interesting conversation that AJ had with his daughter and how it relates to culture [10:42] 
What pride is, plus how it can trap or save us [13:02] 
The struggle the country is facing in the redefinition of America [23:45]
An interesting look at AJ’s experiences with affinity groups in the workplace [28:19] 
A look at why pride is nothing to be proud of [29:57]
Introducing our Models of Respect for this week [39:17]


Links & Resources: 
TikTok Video  
Vermont state rep: ‘I’m proud to be white’ 
Use Your Difference To Make a Difference by Tayo Rockson
Aspects & Assumptions Of White Culture 
Psychology Today Article, Why Pride Is Nothing to Be Proud Of 
Whitney Houston - Greatest Love Of All (Official Video)
The Odd Life of Timothy Green - Have a Great Day SceneAfter traumatic early childhood, high school football star uses fame to help foster kids
Carter: Still a model for candidates asking 'Why not me?'
 

On today’s episode of Respect Circles, we are honored to be joined by guests Dylan Pryor and Cory ​​Spain, as they share their perspectives of a tragic incident that happened 5 years ago in Lone Tree, Colorado. 
March 22nd, 2018 is a day that neither Cory or Dylan will forget, and in this episode, they share the events of that day and the powerful lessons they have learned from it, including the power of forgiveness, what true friendship really is, why adversity does not need to define you, and how to become better, not bitter, in the face of challenging times. You’ll also hear what matters most to them after experiencing an act of gun violence, which we think is timely due to the rising incidents of gun violence in this country. 
We are so grateful that Cory and Dylan stopped by and were so open and vulnerable in sharing their story, and if this beautiful conversation has impacted you as it did for us, please reach out and let us know your biggest takeaways from the episode.
Don’t forget to follow us on Instagram and Facebook, and we’d really appreciate you leaving a review on your favorite podcast platform to let us know what you’re enjoying about this show. You can also go to https://www.respectcircles.com/voicemail/ to leave us a message and you can also reach us by email, respectcircles@gmail.com to give us your thoughts. 
In this episode you’ll hear:
How Cory and Dylan first met and started their friendship, and what this friendship really means to them today [5:05]
The day in 2018 that changed both of their lives forever [8:51]
The way that Cory responded after realizing that his friend had been shot twice [15:01]
What happened in those moments after Dylan got shot, and what the recovery journey was like for him [19:21]
What they’ve learned about the choice to be bitter or better, along with the power of forgiveness [26:33]
A look at the justice path and how the sentencing process unfolded from their perspectives [32:31]
Cory shares an actual part of his testimony from court [38:18]]
Dylan’s thoughts on the increasing amount of guns in the United States and how he feels about gun ownership [43:34]
The importance of mental health care and support, plus why prioritizing your mental health is truly a gift to yourself and the ones you love [48:45]
How Dylan is moving forward from what he experienced that night in the bowling alley [54:12] 


Links & Resources: 
Suspect in Lone Tree bowling alley shooting surrenders to authorities
Jury can't reach decision on most serious charge related to bowling alley shooting

Man shoots bowler who bumped into him, receives 23 years
Cory’s Instagram, Facebook & Email

Dylan’s Instagram & Email