Owning Pleasure As A Black Woman

Natasha Riley
  • 5.0 (10)
  • Mental Health
  • Updated Weekly

A podcast for accomplished Black women ready to stop just surviving and start truly living. I'm Natasha Riley, licensed therapist and CEO of Javery Integrative Wellness Services, and this is where we move beyond talking about change to actually creating it. Each episode gives you practical tools to build a daily pleasure practice—the art of finding joy, presence, and fulfillment in your ordinary life. Because you've already proven you can achieve anything. Now it's time to learn how to enjoy it. This isn't about adding more to your plate. It's about being fully present with what's already there.

  1. May 29

    Why I'm Taking My Own Advice This Summer

    In this Season 6 finale of Owning Pleasure as a Black Woman, Natasha does something radical: she actually takes her own advice. After a season spent naming the patterns that keep high-achieving women stuck — inherited guilt, the productivity trap, the double bind of self-care, the cost of always choosing everyone else — Natasha pauses to reflect on what this season was really about, and what it looks like to move from content consumption to actual implementation. She'll be back in September. And she's inviting you to enjoy your summer too. If you've been nodding along all season and still feel stuck, this episode is your permission slip — and your next step. Key Takeaways: Understanding your patterns and actually changing them require two different things — and knowing the difference is the first real stepConsuming content about rest is not the same as resting — and this season was an invitation to close that gapModeling rest matters: when you see someone else take a real break without the world falling apart, it gives you permission to do the same Listen Now: Hit play to hear why the woman who's been teaching you about rest all season is finally taking some — and why she wants you to do the same. Links Mentioned: Start Your Healing Journey: Ready to stop carrying this alone? Complete the intake form at Javery Integrative Wellness Services to take your next step. [javerywellness.com/get-started]Free 7-Day Self-Care Reset: Not sure if therapy is your next step? Start here. [javerywellness.com/reset] Connect with Us: Instagram: @javerywellnessFacebook: @javeryIWSYouTube: @javerywellnessWebsite: www.javerywellness.com Leave a Review: If this episode resonated with you, please leave a 5-star rating and share what stood out to you in a comment. Your feedback helps other women find this message when they need it most! Music: Mykhailo Kyryliuk via Pixabay

    19 min

  2. May 22

    You're Not Falling Apart — You're Holding Everyone Together (The Sandwich Generation)

    In this episode of Owning Pleasure As A Black Woman, we're talking about the pattern that gets mistaken for strength all the time — hyper-independence. If you're the woman everyone leans on but you can't remember the last time you actually let someone carry something for you, this episode is going to feel very familiar. We explore where this pattern comes from, what it's really protecting you from, and what it might be costing you in your relationships and your sense of connection. This isn't about fixing yourself — it's about understanding yourself, maybe for the first time. Key Takeaways: Hyper-independence is a protective response, not a personality type — and it usually develops for very good reasonsThe same pattern that kept you safe at some point may now be the thing keeping you isolatedTrue connection requires a kind of vulnerability that hyper-independence doesn't allow — and there's a way through that doesn't require you to abandon yourself Listen Now: Hit play to hear why the most exhausting thing you might be doing is refusing to let anyone help you. Links Mentioned: Start Your Healing Journey: Ready to stop carrying this alone? Complete the intake form at Javery Integrative Wellness Services to take your next step. [javerywellness.com/get-started]Free 7-Day Self-Care Reset: Not sure if therapy is your next step? Start here. [javerywellness.com/reset] Connect with Us: Instagram: @javerywellnessFacebook: @javeryIWSYouTube: @javerywellnessWebsite: www.javerywellness.com Leave a Review: If this episode resonated with you, please leave a 5-star rating and share what stood out to you in a comment. Your feedback helps other women find this message when they need it most! Music: Mykhailo Kyryliuk via Pixabay

    20 min

  3. May 15

    Why Asking for Help Feels Dangerous

    In this episode of Owning Pleasure As A Black Woman, we're talking about the pattern that gets mistaken for strength all the time — hyperindependence. If you're the woman everyone leans on but you can't remember the last time you actually let someone carry something for you, this episode is going to feel very familiar. We explore where this pattern comes from, what it's really protecting you from, and what it might be costing you in your relationships and your sense of connection. This isn't about fixing yourself — it's about understanding yourself, maybe for the first time. Key Takeaways: Hyperindependence is a protective response, not a personality type — and it usually develops for very good reasonsThe same pattern that kept you safe at some point may now be the thing keeping you isolatedTrue connection requires a kind of vulnerability that hyperindependence doesn't allow — and there's a way through that doesn't require you to abandon yourself Listen Now: Hit play to hear why the most exhausting thing you might be doing is refusing to let anyone help you. Links Mentioned: Start Your Healing Journey: Ready to stop carrying this alone? Complete the intake form at Javery Integrative Wellness Services to take your next step. [javerywellness.com/get-started]Free 7-Day Self-Care Reset: Not sure if therapy is your next step? Start here. [javerywellness.com/reset] Connect with Us: Instagram: @javerywellnessFacebook: @javeryIWSYouTube: @javerywellnessWebsite: www.javerywellness.com Leave a Review: If this episode resonated with you, please leave a 5-star rating and share what stood out to you in a comment. Your feedback helps other women find this message when they need it most! Music: Mykhailo Kyryliuk via Pixabay

    19 min
  4. She Did Everything Right w/ Symone' Austin

    May 8

    She Did Everything Right w/ Symone' Austin

    In this episode of Owning Pleasure As A Black Woman, we sit down with Simone’ — UX content designer turned full-time content creator — for one of the most honest conversations we've had about what happens when you do everything you were supposed to do... and life still falls apart. After nearly a decade in tech, Simone was laid off in 2025. She recorded the moment, posted it, and watched it reach over 700,000 views overnight. But this episode isn't really about going viral. It's about what it means to lose the thing you built your identity around, have to ask for help when you've never done that before, and slowly discover that the version of yourself on the other side is someone you actually like. If you've ever felt like your worth was wrapped up in your job title, struggled to ask for support, or wondered what it would look like to finally choose yourself — this one's for you. 📷 Love the video quality in this episode? Simone records using the Acer 4K Webcam — shop it on her Amazon Storefront here. This is an affiliate link. Simone’ may earn a small commission if you purchase through this link, at no extra cost to you. Key Takeaways: Grief looks like guilt: Simone’ shares how losing a job she didn't even cause felt like letting her family down — and what that revealed about where her sense of worth was living.Asking for help is a skill, not a weakness: From getting a roommate to launching a Buy Me a Coffee, Simone’ had to completely reframe what it meant to receive support — and found out people were more generous than she expected.Survival mode can quietly become your ceiling: It wasn't until Simone’ stopped just trying to cover her bills and started asking "what if I actually went for it?" that everything shifted. Watch the Video That Started It All: See the moment Simone recorded her layoff in real time — the video that reached over 700,000 views. And yes, she made $15,000 in 30 days – check out how she did it. Watch on YouTube: Prefer to watch instead of listen? Head over to our YouTube channel to catch the full episode: [Watch it here.] Listen Now: Ready to get inspired? Hit play to hear what becomes possible when the life you planned stops working — and you finally let yourself want something different. Follow Simone: YouTube: youtube.com/@lifeandnumbersInstagram: instagram.com/thelifeandnumbersTikTok: tiktok.com/@lifeandnumbersSubstack: substack.com/@lifeandnumbers Links Mentioned: Start Your Healing Journey: Ready to stop carrying this alone? Complete the intake form at Javery Integrative Wellness Services to take your next step. [javerywellness.com/get-started]Free 7-Day Self-Care Reset: Not sure if therapy is your next step? Start here. [javerywellness.com/reset] Connect with Us: Instagram: @javerywellnessFacebook: @javeryIWSYouTube: @javerywellnessWebsite: www.javerywellness.com Leave a Review: If this episode resonated with you, please leave a 5-star rating and share what stood out to you in a comment. Your feedback helps other women find this message when they need it most! Music: Mykhailo Kyryliuk via Pixabay

    51 min

  5. May 1

    Ability vs. Capacity

    In this episode of Owning Pleasure As A Black Woman, we're sitting with a distinction that has the potential to change everything: the difference between ability and capacity. Being able to handle something has never meant you were supposed to. If you're a high-achieving woman who keeps saying yes out of competence rather than bandwidth, this episode will help you see why — and what it's been costing you. Tune in for warm, honest reflection on the survival pattern of overriding your own limits, and what it might look like to finally stop. Key Takeaways: Ability is what your skills allow. Capacity is what your system can sustain. Confusing the two is a pattern, not a personality trait.For many high-achieving Black women, demonstrating ability became a survival strategy — but honoring capacity was never modeled as an option.When we consistently override capacity, the body eventually forces the pause we refused to give ourselves. Watch on YouTube: Prefer to watch? Head over to our YouTube channel to catch the full episode: Owning Pleasure with Natasha Chentille. Watch it here. Listen Now: Ready to give yourself permission to work within your actual limits? Hit play. Links Mentioned: Get Started with Therapy: Ready to move from understanding to implementation? Complete the intake form a javerywellness.com/get-started Free 7-Day Self-Care Reset: Start taking action today. Download our free guide and join our newsletter at javerywellness.com/reset Connect With Us: Instagram: @javerywellnessFacebook: @javeryIWSYouTube: @javerywellnessWebsite: www.javerywellness.com Leave a Review: If this episode resonated with you, please leave a 5-star rating and share what stood out to you in a comment. Your feedback helps other women find this message when they need it most! Music: Mykhailo Kyryliuk via Pixabay

    17 min

  6. Apr 24

    How to Choose Yourself When Everyone Needs You

    In this episode of Owning Pleasure As A Black Woman, we explore what it actually feels like to always be the one everyone turns to — and why choosing yourself can feel like a betrayal even when you're running on empty. This isn't about self-care checklists. It's about the deep, inherited pattern of putting yourself last and what it's costing you long-term. If you're the woman everyone needs and you can't remember the last time someone asked what you need — this episode is for you. Key Takeaways: The pattern of putting yourself last isn't a character flaw — it's a learned survival response, and it makes complete sense given what many of us were taught early in life.Choosing yourself often triggers fear because on some level, your nervous system has connected your availability to your worth. Naming that fear is the first step to changing it.Understanding why you put yourself last is valuable — but shifting the pattern safely, working through the guilt, and learning to set down what you've been carrying takes more than awareness alone. Resources Mentioned: Complete the intake form: javerywellness.com/get-startedFree 7-Day Self-Care Reset: javerywellness.com/reset Connect With Us: Instagram: @javerywellnessFacebook: @javeryIWSYouTube: @javerywellnessWebsite: www.javerywellness.com Leave a Review: If this episode resonated with you, please leave a 5-star rating and share what stood out to you in a comment. Your feedback helps other women find this message when they need it most! Music: Mykhailo Kyryliuk via Pixabay

    17 min

  7. Apr 17

    The Weight of Being Called to More

    In this episode of Owning Pleasure as a Black Woman, we get honest about something most ambitious women feel but rarely say out loud — the exhaustion of your own drive. Host Natasha opens up about her own moments of wanting a regular life, the relief of imagining a simpler existence, and what it means when the people who love you keep reminding you that you weren't made for that. If you've ever thought what if I just stopped — even briefly — this one is for you. Key Takeaways: Ambition Fatigue is real: The weariness of living at the edge of your own capacity isn't weakness or ingratitude — it's your nervous system asking for relief from the perpetual becoming.The "regular life" fantasy is protection: It's protecting you from the vulnerability of your calling being heavy, from the grief of knowing what you know about yourself, and from having to feel everything you've been outrunning.Ambition and self-care don't have to be at war: When they are, you end up resenting your own gifts and performing self-care rather than feeling it. The goal isn't to quiet your ambition — it's to let your self-care become spacious enough to hold it. Reflection Questions from This Episode: When you imagine that regular life, what specifically does it feel like? What are you longing for — and is there a version of that available within your real life?Is your ambition currently running on vision and joy — or on fear and proving? What would it look like to be ambitious and well-rested? Not one or the other — both at the same time. Listen Now: Hit play for the woman who sometimes wishes she could just want less — and then hates herself for thinking it. Connect With Us: Instagram: @javerywellnessFacebook: @javeryIWSYouTube: @javerywellnessWebsite: www.javerywellness.com Leave a Review: If this episode resonated with you, please leave a 5-star rating and share what stood out to you in a comment. Your feedback helps other women find this message when they need it most! Music: Mykhailo Kyryliuk via Pixabay

    15 min

  8. Apr 10

    How to Get Your Yes Back When You Should've Said No

    In this episode of Owning Pleasure As A Black Woman, we're talking about what happens when your yes stops belonging to you. If you've been saying yes out of obligation, habit, or fear for so long that you can't even locate what you actually want anymore — this one is for you. We explore the pattern of compulsive compliance, why it develops, what it protects you from, and the real cost it carries over time. This isn't about learning to say no. It's about understanding how you lost your yes in the first place — and what it takes to get it back. Key Takeaways: Constantly saying yes out of obligation isn't a personality trait — it's a survival pattern, and it makes complete sense given what many of us have been taught about our role, our worth, and what keeping the peace requiresWhen your yes is automatic, your desire goes offline — and over time, you stop knowing what you actually wantGetting your yes back isn't about learning a script or a technique — it's about rebuilding trust with yourself, one honest moment at a time Listen Now: Hit play to explore what it really means to get your yes back — and why it's about so much more than saying no. Links Mentioned: Get Started with Therapy: Ready to move from understanding to implementation? Complete the intake form a javerywellness.com/get-started Free 7-Day Self-Care Reset: Start taking action today. Download our free guide and join our newsletter at javerywellness.com/reset Connect With Us: Instagram: @javerywellnessFacebook: @javeryIWSYouTube: @javerywellnessWebsite: www.javerywellness.com Leave a Review: If this episode resonated with you, please leave a 5-star rating and share what stood out to you in a comment. Your feedback helps other women find this message when they need it most! Music: Mykhailo Kyryliuk via Pixabay

    21 min
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About

A podcast for accomplished Black women ready to stop just surviving and start truly living. I'm Natasha Riley, licensed therapist and CEO of Javery Integrative Wellness Services, and this is where we move beyond talking about change to actually creating it. Each episode gives you practical tools to build a daily pleasure practice—the art of finding joy, presence, and fulfillment in your ordinary life. Because you've already proven you can achieve anything. Now it's time to learn how to enjoy it. This isn't about adding more to your plate. It's about being fully present with what's already there.

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