Just Out of Curiosity with Shelley Dee

Just Out of Curiosity
  • 5.0 (1)
  • Society & Culture
  • Updated Weekly

A podcast that talks about sex and sexuality from the lens of a sex positive brown woman that has a fascination with alternative or non-conventional lifestyles.

  1. 08/16/2022

    15 And So... (It's Over)

    And so, my curiosity today leads to this crazy world we live in. I’ve spent a season talking to people where the underlying factor is identity and issues stemming from societal constructs of gender. As Brene Brown says, "Vulnerability is not winning or losing; it's having the courage to show up and be seen when we have no control over the outcome. Vulnerability is not weakness; it's our greatest measure of courage” . And that’s essentially what I wanted to do with this podcast. I wanted to create something where I showed up and have conversations in ways that I didn’t think were happening and just let people speak about their lives. Everyone is an expert on their life and lived experience. I don’t want to hear stories about people, I wanted to talk to them so they can say their story. My hope is that someone may listen and realize that they’re not alone and that there are allies out there. Because, what it feels like is, we all want to be seen, we all want to be heard and acknowledged and validated. I'll see you next season! justoutofcuriosity.ca

    22 min

  2. 08/09/2022

    14 BDSM, Fetish and Kink... oh my! Lady Azelle

    And so, my curiosity today leads to sex. I started this season talking about performative vs pleasurable sex and now I’m curious about how kink, fetish and bdsm factor into the equation. Respect, communication and consent play such an important role, but how can that affect your partnership and sex life, especially when it feels like there are such a traditional gender roles that we get conditioned into? Lady Azelle is a professional domme based in Toronto. I couldn’t be more excited than to pick her brain about how she sees sex and power dynamics, discuss the shame and stigma surrounding submissive men and working in the sex industry but also how being curious and exploring could add more growth to your partnership.   To rent her studios: torontodungeonrental justoutofcuriosity.ca

    1h 18m

  3. 08/02/2022

    13 Velvet Rage: Dr. Jess Erb

    And so, my curiosity today leads to mental health. There’s a common theme that runs prevalent over these episodes; when people feel they don’t belong or aren’t seen by society, what and how does that feeling manifest in people? How do you try and live your most authentic life being happy, when society (sometimes your own family) aren’t comfortable or don’t want to acknowledge who you are as a person? I think its kinda crazy that “coming out” has to be announced. Straight people don’t have to come out and pronounce themselves as straight to their friends and family. Cis people don’t have to identify their pronouns. We don’t really live in a world where everyone has rights. Specific people have rights. The rest get allowances. This is something we’re still being reminded of to this day. We don’t really live in a free world, and We won’t achieve full equality by just focusing on our own struggles and ignoring the causes that don’t seem to involve us. I’m a very big advocate for therapy because we aren’t perfect people, our parents/family aren’t perfect people, we are all just trying to learn how to live and love in this crazy world. But the one thing I’ve learned more than anything is how trauma manifests from specific instances from our past. It’s kinda crazy how our brain tries to protect us from feeling hurt or thinks it's trying to protect us from feeling hurt. But how does that show up when you feel like you can’t be yourself around everyone? Dr. Jess Erb is a psychotherapist that specializes with trauma and the LGBTQI2S+ community. I wanted to get her thoughts on the effect of being gay in a straight world and about how trauma can present itself. She is the founder of Centred Self.  Or on Instagram: centred_self The Velvet Rage: Overcoming the Pain of Growing Up Gay in a Straight Man's World (on Amazon) In The Velvet Rage, psychologist Alan Downs draws on his own struggle with shame and anger, contemporary research, and stories from his patients to passionately describe the stages of a gay man's journey out of shame and offers practical and inspired strategies to stop the cycle of avoidance and self-defeating behaviour. justoutofcuriosity.ca

    1 hr

  4. 07/26/2022

    12 The Bar is in Hell: Shemar Ricketts

    And so, my curiosity today leads to dating… again. Let’s flip it and reverse it now, I knew when I was done dating but how do you know what you’re looking for and what you want when you’re navigating the dating pool and the quote unquote sea of lost souls on the apps? What's up with dating from other perspectives? How do you deal with the toxic side of masculinity while dating other men? How does our upbringing and cultural differences play into how we see ourselves and relationships with other people?  It’s not easy looking after your own mental health, somewhat manage not negatively affecting other’s mental health but also being on a personal mission of finding someone; whether it's for the next couple of hours, the night or a lifetime. Shemar gets real, honest and personal about dating, coming out and living with his Jamaican family. justoutofcuriosity.ca Show Notes https://everydayfeminism.com/2016/02/femmephobia-queer-community/

    1 hr

  5. 07/19/2022

    11 When are you Done Dating? Shelley's Boyfriend

    And so, my curiosity today leads to dating. I’ll just put it out there, its worse dating now than before. The world is at your fingertips if you chose online dating, but let me tell you, its about a 50% chance you’ll come across someone you’ve seen recently, a year ago, a couple of years ago; no change there. I’ll come across some new profiles and ponder for a bit whether I’ll actually connect or if it will be a waste of time, only to realize I just spent 15 minutes thinking of what dating that person would be like before even swiping right on them. And swiping right doesn’t actually mean anything unless they’ve swiped right on me. I force myself sometimes to message someone. But when they respond, and it's fun and refreshing and you get along so well, that you have to meet. Passing that online portion is about 40% of the hurdle. It feels weird to say this out loud, but I don’t have a whole lot of experience in relationships. And it becomes apparent when I struggle with dealing with feelings and emotions… but when you find someone that you want to break through all those hurdles and then some, how on earth do you navigate that world? When I first started recording episodes and putting this altogether, I was dating, but mostly single. However, something happened and I met someone. t’s been a whirlwind couple of months. So why not bring him on so we can deep dive this relationship of ours…. You can follow Jesse on Instagram You can follow Silly Robbie You can go to justoutofcuriosity.ca

    1h 16m

  6. 07/12/2022

    10 The Abortion Debate: Kylee Bakowski

    WARNING ALERT *DETAILED DISCUSSION OF MEDICATION ABORTION EXPERIENCE, MAY BE DIFFICULT FOR SOME LISTENERS* And so, my curiosity today leads to a controversial topic that is stemming quite the debate; abortion. Somehow a medical procedure has turned into a debate on ethics and morals and is dividing us. Is there a way for both sides to live harmoniously? What am I missing or not getting when it comes to abortion? Kylee (@kyleebakowski) has had quite the journey and is working for a pro-choice organization as an education and training manager. She joins me to share her story and just be real with me about what abortion actually is.  Stay tuned for next years #boudoirsforabortion calendar! Show Notes Statistics; Abortion in Canada After Tiller Documentary is a 2013 documentary film that follows the only four remaining doctors in the United States who openly perform abortions in the third trimester of pregnancy. In 2015, After Tiller won the News and Documentary Emmy Award for Best Documentary.         The title of the film refers to George Tiller, a doctor who performed abortions and was murdered in 2009.   You can find it on Google or Amazon Prime.  It is not available on YouTube. To Donate: National Abortion Federation Canada Abortion Rights Coalition of Canada Action Canada for Sexual Health & Rights You can follow me: Insta:@justcuriositypod TikTok:@justcuriositypod1  OR www.justoutofcuriosity.ca

    1h 18m

  7. 07/05/2022

    09 The Shame of Rape: Shelley Dee

    And so, my curiosity today leads to a topic that I’ve wanted to talk about for a while as its something pretty personal to myself (and it must be to others). Sex and what can happen when our clothes come off can be a pretty special thing between people- when done consensually. Unfortunately, there are ugly sides to non-consent and we don’t spend a lot of time talking about it.  This will be an interesting episode because this is my episode. I’ve been involved in non-consensual activity and I spent a lot of time with that shame. No matter how much you can appear to be okay, there’s that judgement in the back of your head telling you how you messed up. And that’s the worst part about rape and non-consent, the victim (someone that had something done to them) is the one blamed when someone non-consensually takes advantage of them. It makes me sick that we still live in this world where we talk less about the attacker and more on how the victim is to be blamed.  And instead of living in that shame, I’m choosing to talk about it. I’ve brought back Dr. Stephen DeWit, Sexologist to help navigate this episode with me. You can check out Stephen's podcast: https://sexlifeunleashed.com/podcast Instagram @drdewit You can follow me: Insta:@justcuriositypod TikTok:@justcuriositypod1  OR www.justoutofcuriosity.ca

    1h 28m

  8. 06/28/2022

    08 Mid-Season Mixdown: Jon de la Cruz

    And so, my curiosity today leads to reflecting back at this first half of this season. I’ll be honest, I had no idea how much work this would be and its been quite the journey. Up to this point, I had recorded all my episodes prior to launching. Through editing myself I cringe at the things I say, wishing I had followed up or talked more about certain things or gotten really annoyed with how bad my audio has been. When I was editing my first episode with Jon all I kept hearing was my mouth making these noises and I was ready to stop editing because I was so embarrassed I allowed myself to record in such a way… I work in TV!! I thank the people that have supported and helped me with this podcast. I also thank you all for joining me on this journey and allowing me to figure out my voice. I appreciate your messages and comments! It means SO much more to me than you’ll ever know. And while my voice is burnt out from this past Pride Weekend in Toronto. I couldn’t think of a better way to reflect on previous episodes and culminate it with talking about Pride and what it means than with my gay bestie, Jon de la Cruz! @jon_delacruz You can follow me: Insta:@justcuriositypod TikTok:@justcuriositypod1  OR www.justoutofcuriosity.ca

    1h 14m
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A podcast that talks about sex and sexuality from the lens of a sex positive brown woman that has a fascination with alternative or non-conventional lifestyles.

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