Connect with our Guest: https://mishabonaventura.com/ https://www.soulplay.co/ This episode is a lively, idea-driven conversation about how consent-focused sex parties could function as more than entertainment and instead become a tool for education, connection, and cultural change. Adam Braus and Scot Maupin are joined by sex and relationship coach and consent culture pioneer Misha Bonaventura, who argues that these spaces can help people practice consent, reduce loneliness, and unlearn shame around pleasure. We discuss what a consent-forward sex party actually looks like, why Misha sees it as a response to toxic sex culture, and how smaller entry points like cuddle parties and PG-13 events can help more people participate safely. The conversation also touches on jealousy, non-monogamy, community norms, and why learning how to say yes and no clearly matters far beyond sex. Misha Bonaventura (mishabonaventura.com) is a sex & relationship coach (bonaventura-coaching.shinepages.com), consent culture pioneer and producer of transformational play spaces. She's been a leader in the sex positive scene of the Bay Area for over a decade. Now leading SoulPlay Festival (soulplay.co) as Executive Producer, she is deeply passionate about helping people and communities build a pleasure based life through deeper understandings of consent, trusting that conflict is a path to intimacy, and leading the way to pleasure based living. She brings years of experience producing sexy parties, Somatica Coaching, Co-Active Coaching, Light Dark Institute, and Nonviolent Communication to helping you love, connect and repair with more courage and less armor. Timestamps 00:00 — Misha’s big idea: sex parties could save the world 01:10 — What a consent-forward space looks like 02:27 — Why toxic sex culture makes this conversation necessary 04:59 — Consent as explicit, collaborative communication 06:08 — Curation, boundaries, and who attends 08:30 — Bodies, beauty, and why anonymity isn’t the point 09:26 — Community-based relating at Bonobo Network 11:01 — Festivals and colleges as spaces with unspoken sexual dynamics 12:31 — Relationship styles and who attends 14:27 — From small gatherings to 200-person parties 15:03 — PG-13 parties as a more accessible entry point 20:04 — Cuddle parties, Soul Play Festival, and consent education 22:18 — Consent, choice, and resisting authoritarian habits 23:48 — How safer spaces can support sexual expression 24:46 — Why “don’t be creepy” needs clearer guidance 26:18 — A consent scene from The Night of the Iguana 27:55 — The Invite and the ethics of group sexual dynamics 29:40 — What happens at a PG-13 party 31:37 — Foucault, sexual repression, and cultural norms 33:29 — Jealousy, admiration, and connection 36:48 — De-escalation and staying in community after breakups 38:47 — A compatibility framework: fantasy, chemistry, availability, and core expression 40:35 — Designing accessible entry points—and acknowledging potential downsides 43:45 — Balancing security, freedom, and novelty in relationships 46:49 — Where to find Misha Thanks to Jonah Burns for the SFM music.
