For Better Or Best Podcast

REVOLT
REVOLT
  • 4.9 (99)
  • Relationships
  • Updated Weekly

Hosts Charles Beloved and Shireen Kuykendoll talk marriage, family life, Black love, and entrepreneurship. Join them every Wednesday where they share their experiences and give the audience a taste of how they balance chaos with blessings.

  1. 5d ago

    Birthday Behavior

    It’s birthday season on the pod! Charles and Shireen get real about milestone birthdays, birthday-trip etiquette, money, marriage, and what it really means to feel celebrated. Then things get vulnerable as Charles opens up about wanting to become a dad again, the financial pressure behind that dream, and what matters most when building a family. 00:00–03:39 - Birthday Boy Energy  Charles kicks off his birthday episode talking about why he unapologetically celebrates himself after spending the rest of the year taking care of everyone else. He and Shireen also reflect on getting older and how long they’ve been together. 03:39–08:18 - Which Birthdays Are Actually Milestones? Charles and Shireen debate which ages deserve major celebrations, from 16 and 21 to 30, 40, 50 and beyond. They also talk about why turning 40 feels different when you have more financial freedom and life experience. 08:18–10:24 - Your Friend’s Birthday Is on YOUR Birthday Trip?!  They react to a viral story about a woman whose friend refused to celebrate her birthday because it was technically her birthday trip. Charles and Shireen debate friendship, consideration, and whether there’s really room for everyone to feel celebrated. 10:24–12:07 - Why Some People Take Birthdays So Seriously The conversation gets deeper as they explore why birthdays can become more meaningful after experiencing loss, health scares, or major life changes. They also share their own evolving feelings about birthdays. 12:07–14:30 - What Makes You Feel Loved on Your Birthday?  After years of marriage, Charles explains what actually makes him feel celebrated by Shireen. He says experiences and creating memories with his spouse, friends, and family mean much more to him now than expensive gifts. 14:30–18:32 - The Birthday Surprise That Almost Went Wrong  Shireen tells the story of planning a major surprise celebration for Charles and trying to get him to the venue without giving it away. Charles explains why surprising him can be difficult when he’s constantly working. 18:32–24:47 - “Why Are You Still Working?!” Their birthday-surprise story turns into a bigger conversation about work, marriage, and the frustration of trying to plan something special for someone whose schedule is always changing. They also laugh about Charles figuring out that something was happening. 24:47–30:42 - Who Should Pay for a Birthday Dinner? Charles and Shireen get into birthday-party etiquette and whether guests should ever be expected to pay for their own meals. They debate birthday dinners versus more casual happy-hour celebrations and how couples can take the financial pressure off their friends. 30:42–33:43 - I Wanna Become a Dad Again The conversation takes an emotional turn when Charles reveals what he truly wants for this next chapter of his life: becoming a dad again. He opens up about adoption, surrogacy, and the financial anxiety that has made him hesitant to move forward. 33:43–35:12 - What Kids Really Remember  Shireen challenges Charles’ fears about providing the “perfect” life for another child, reminding him that their children will remember the love, laughter, and memories more than the money spent. The episode closes with an incredibly heartfelt birthday message and Charles’ dream of having another child. Happy Birthday to all the Virgos! Keep up with us on IG @forbetterorbestpod Listen to us on Apple and Spotify  Like, Subscribe, and Share! xoxo Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  2. Sep 2

    Love While Lit

    What does it really look like to be in a secure relationship while still having a life of your own? In Episode 44, the Kuykendolls are talking love while lit; from Crop Over in Barbados and dancing with strangers to opposite-sex friendships, boundaries, trust, independence, and the freedom that comes from knowing your partner always has your back.  2:25–4:22 - Our First Crop Over Together Shireen and Charles recap their first Crop Over experience in Barbados and the incredible energy of the island. They talk about the festivities, the culture, and how much they enjoyed experiencing it together. 4:22–6:05 - What Does “Love While Lit” Mean?  Charles introduces the topic of “Love While Lit” and asks how a couple can enjoy going out together and separately while still respecting the relationship. Shireen and Charles discuss where the line of responsibility falls when you’re a couple who likes to have fun. 6:05–9:59 - So Who Was Shireen Dancing With? Charles tells the story of being at Crop Over and initially thinking Shireen wasn’t dancing with anyone else. He later discovers video of Shireen dancing with another man after she and Raye had been gone for over an hour. 10:17–12:20 - The Crop Over Defense Shireen explains what actually happened with her and Raye and the circumstances surrounding the dancing. Charles questions the situation while Shireen gives her side of the story. 13:10–16:20 - Dancing, Drinks & Relationship Rules  A debate is sparked about what should and shouldn’t be considered inappropriate when you’re out without your partner. They get into dancing, drinking, attention from other people, and the expectations they have within their marriage. 16:20–20:29 - Trust vs. Insecurity  Charles and Shireen discuss opposite-sex friendships and why they don’t automatically view attention from someone else as a threat. They explore the difference between trusting your partner and allowing insecurity to dictate the relationship. 20:29–24:47 - Private vs. Secretive Charles and Shireen talk about the difference between having privacy and actually hiding things from your partner. They discuss being able to openly share situations involving other people without feeling like they have to hide or censor themselves. 25:37–30:31 - I Trust You, I Don’t Trust Them. Charles explains that he trusts Shireen but knows there will always be people who try to test boundaries. They discuss putting the responsibility on each other to recognize those situations and protect the relationship. 30:31–34:47 - Freedom Is a Byproduct of Trust  Charles and Shireen discuss how trust allows them to have separate friends, schedules, interests, and experiences outside of their marriage. They talk about how having freedom and time apart can actually make them better together. 34:51–42:01 - LIT OR TOO LIT? 🔥 Charles and Shireen put their relationship boundaries to the test with “Lit or Too Lit.” They react to scenarios involving 4AM nights, Vegas trips, opposite-sex dinners, someone buying your spouse a drink, vacations with single friends, unanswered phone calls, exes at parties, and after-parties. Keep up with us on IG @forbetterorbestpod Listen to us on Apple and Spotify  Like, Subscribe, and Share! xoxo Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  3. Aug 26

    Black Boy Joy feat. Maurice Kuykendoll

    Episode 43 brings up one the Kuykendolls’ most emotional and impactful conversations yet. After discussing the case of Nolan Wells, they reflect on what it means to raise Black boys in America, the difficult conversations Black parents eventually have to have with their children, and the tension between teaching kids to “shine their light” while also preparing them for moments when they may need to move differently. 1:02-2:26 Gauchos & Lotion Shireen and Charles kick things off with their usual playful banter before getting into the much heavier conversation ahead. They explain why For Better Or Best generally focuses on their own lives rather than celebrity gossip or current events, and why this particular story hit too close to home to ignore.  2:40-3:20 The Nolan Wells Case & Seeing Your Own Children in the Story Shireen opens up about the emotional impact of Nolan Wells’ story and how, as a parent, she couldn’t help but see her own sons in him and herself in his mother. 4:24-5:59 What It Means to Be “One of One” Shireen and Charles discuss their own experiences being the only Black person in certain environments and the uncomfortable reality that Black people sometimes have to navigate spaces differently because of race.  6:15-7:40 “There Will Be a Moment Where We Tell You, Dim That Light” One of the episode’s most powerful moments: Shireen wrestles with approaching “the talk”, and having to teach her sons that despite encouraging them to be bold and confident, there may be situations where their safety requires them to make themselves smaller.  7:52-8:27 Protecting Your Children Without Suffocating Them Shireen and Charles explore the impossible parenting balance between giving children independence and protecting them from dangers they aren’t old enough to fully recognize. 8:43-9:34 Does More Money Actually Mean More Safety? Charles reflects on moving from less affluent communities into safer neighborhoods and how even those “safer” environments came with unexpected dangers, including break-ins. 10:13-11:48  The Fear of Simply Existing Shireen talks about one of her deepest fears as a mother: that her children could someday be placed in danger simply because of how they look or because someone decides they don’t belong in a particular space. She’s trying to empower them with life skills while explaining how the rules are not the same for them as they are for children/people of other races.  13:03-15:03 Pastor Maurice Kuykendoll Joins the Conversation Charles introduces his father, thanking him for all the values he instilled in his boys. Maurice discusses raising three boys on Chicago’s South Side and how he balanced protecting his children while allowing them to grow into confident, self-aware, independent adults. 15:50-17:15 The “P’s” of Parenting Maurice shares the foundation he used while raising his sons: prayer, protection, provision, and presence, with preparation emerging as another crucial part of raising children who are ready for the real world. He credits Charles’ mother and his stepmother for being great teammates in parenting. 18:01-19:40 “What Was Important to Me Became Important to You” Maurice tells a beautiful story about bringing a young Charles to choir rehearsals and church services. His point: children absorb what they repeatedly see their parents value, which is why presence matters so much. Charles loves that his dad remembers those early moments.  21:13-23:15 Preparing Black Children for Encounters With Law Enforcement + Final Message to Parents Charles asks his father about the best way to have “the talk” and what points matter most. Maurice offers practical advice: “the truth is your best medicine.” The episode closes with Shireen speaking directly to Black mothers and parents carrying the heavy mental load of worrying about their children, reminding them to support one another, pray, and trust in discernment.  Keep up with us on IG @forbetterorbestpod Listen to us on Apple and Spotify  Like, Subscribe, and Share! xoxo Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  4. Aug 19

    Oxtail and Evictions

    In this energetic and revealing episode, Charles and Shireen reflect on the whirlwind year of building the Oxtail Off tour from a house party into a multi‑city cultural event, sharing the highs, the financial risks, the team effort, and the emotional moments behind the scenes. They close with a candid story about landlord life, late rent, and unexpected tenant drama; because real life doesn’t stop for success. 0:01 - 1:18 Catching up & Charles’ “Nike Beloved” era The episode opens with playful banter about outfits, energy, and how bright the year has felt. Charles walks through the different Nike and Jordan Brand moments that made him feel seen as a personality, not just a host. 2:03 - 3:35 Shireen’s friendship deep dive Shireen introduces Aristotle’s framework for friendship and uses it to frame how we relate to people as adults. She gently invites listeners to think about which friendships are rooted in depth versus convenience. 4:08 - 6:31 When your heart is virtue but people treat you like utility Charles talks about how he naturally shows up with loyalty and long‑term intention when he calls someone a friend. Shireen, from a protective place, points out that some people may be around more for what he represents than who he is. 7:33 - 8:17 The LA chapter & seeing people clearly They revisit their time in Los Angeles as a turning point for understanding who was truly ride‑or‑die. Big milestones like weddings and anniversaries became quiet tests of who showed up and who didn’t. 8:17 - 9:34 How Oxtail Off started in their living room They reminisce about the very first Oxtail Off, which was literally a gathering in their home with friends and food. That intimate beginning makes the later demand and scale feel even more surreal. 10:25 - 11:32 The leap from one city to five Charles admits that expanding to a five‑city tour was part ambition, part ego, and part wanting to prove something to himself. He wanted to show that he could build something culturally meaningful, not just throw a party. 12:04 - 13:29 Realizing they accidentally built five festivals As they break down the logistic; DJs, dancers, judges, production, staging. They realize they didn’t just plan events, they planned full‑scale festivals. The workload and stress hit differently once they saw how many moving parts had to sync every single week. 18:03 - 18:31 The emotional moment when community showed up Charles shares how overwhelming it was to see people organically creating content, doing recaps, and treating Oxtail Off like a cultural staple. The press coverage and sold‑out cities felt like confirmation that the risk was worth it. 19:03 - 19:51 Sold‑out shows & turning down last‑minute ticket offers They talk about the tension of having to shut down ticket sales days early because the venue was truly at capacity. Even when people tried to offer way above ticket price, they held the line to keep the experience safe and honest. 41:35 - 44:20 Real life chaos: landlord struggles & tenant drama The episode closes with a pivot into real life; being landlords while juggling everything else. They walk through the stress of late rent, confusing communication, and how hard it is to navigate money conversations when you’re already stretched thin. Keep up with us on IG @forbetterorbestpod Listen to us on Apple and Spotify Like, Subscribe, and Share! xoxo Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  5. Aug 12

    The 10 And Non-Attendees

    The Kuykendolls are BACK and they’re celebrating 10 years of marriage! After a 6 month hiatus, Charles and Shireen recap their unforgettable anniversary weekend in Barbados; 200+ guests, surprise performances with a live band, a foam pool party/fete, and a live podcast all accompanied by hookah and stop shelf liquor😂 This extravaganza also sparked some real conversations about friendship, reciprocity, showing up for the people you love when it matters most, and what happens when you don’t. 10 years down. Still outside, still in love!❤️‍🔥 1:17 -10 Years Married! The Kuykendolls recap their unforgettable 10-year anniversary celebration in Barbados with friends and family. 2:09 - The Invisalign Fight 😂 Shireen reveals why she was ready to blame Charles for letting her get Invisalign. 5:06 - Why Barbados? They explain why they ultimately chose Barbados over Antigua for their anniversary celebration. 10:35 - Their Superpower: Building Community. They reflect on bringing their nearest and dearest together and watching new friendships form throughout the weekend. 14:06 - Charles’ Hot Take: Wedding Receptions Are Boring. He explains his unconventional wedding philosophy and why he wanted theirs to feel more like a concert. 17:53 - They Spared NO Expense on the Food. From oxtail and mac pie to lobster tails, they reveal how they transformed the resort’s menu. 20:49 - The Surprise Performances! Case and RL unexpectedly take the stage, sending the crowd into a frenzy. 27:50 - The Legendary Pool Party. Overcast weather turns into an all-out Caribbean day party featuring soca, hookahs, foam and moko jumbies. 31:21 - Who Showed Up—and Who Didn’t? Charles and Shereen get real about friendship, reciprocity and the people who skipped their 10-year celebration. 37:48 - “I’m Spiteful, Beloved.” 😂 Charles explains how he’s changing the way he invests in friendships after Barbados. We close out the episode with a special appearance from CJ, who states that the anniversary weekend is one of the best memories of his life. Ours too, CJ! 😘 Keep up with us on IG @forbetterorbestpod Listen to us on Apple and Spotify Like, Subscribe, and Share! xoxo Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  6. Apr 24

    Soft Life, Strong Strategy feat. Jack Howard

    Episode 40 of the Better, Best Podcast live from Revolt House at SXSW was one for the books! This conversation with Jack Howard, Head of Money Wellness at Ally Financial, was bigger than budgets and credit scores—it was about the emotional relationship we all have with money. From “poverty PTSD” to credit card cycles, from first-generation wealth building to marriage, entrepreneurship, and generational legacy; Charles and Shireen set the stage for a raw conversation on money, marriage, and breaking generational cycles. 0:03 - 1:12 What is “Money Wellness”?; Jack breaks down the difference between financial literacy vs. money wellness: one is math, the other is your relationship with money. 2:18 -3:36 “Poverty PTSD” + Scarcity Mindset; Shireen opens up about refusing to use autopay because childhood financial stress taught her to always stay in control. 3:41 - 5:00 Your First Memory of Money; The conversation shifts to how childhood money stories shape adult spending habits and financial anxiety. 5:00 - 6:08 Rewriting Your Money Beliefs; Jack introduces money mantras and explains how abundance starts with changing internal narratives. 6:10 - 9:21 Charles’ Prom Story + Fear of Hearing “No”; A powerful reflection on how one high school moment shaped his relationship with money, success, and spending. 9:31 - 12:49 Emotional Spending + Credit Card Debt; Jack gets honest about how high earners can still get trapped in spending cycles when emotions drive financial decisions. 13:02 - 17:57 The Return on Joy; One of the biggest gems: Does your spending reflect your values? Or are you just buying for validation? 18:18 - 23:29 Founder Money Energy; What healthy money habits actually look like for entrepreneurs balancing risk, business growth, and real life. 23:56 - 27:34 Money Conversations in Relationships; The must-ask questions every couple should discuss early: money stories, values, goals, and yes… credit scores too Money isn’t just numbers. It’s values. It’s trauma, It’s identity. It’s freedom and legacy. And if you don’t understand your money story… your money story will keep writing itself.  Make sure you follow our guest Jack Howard @jackhoward_gems and keep up with us @forbetterorbestpod xoxo  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  7. Jan 28

    Why Did I Get Married?

    Marriage isn’t just the highlight reel, it’s the quirks, the compromises, the petty debates, and the deep love that keeps two people choosing each other every day. In this episode, Charles and Shireen pull back the curtain on ten years of partnership, from fur‑coat miracles to thermostat wars to the art of minding your business in your friends’ relationships. It’s honest, hilarious, and a reminder that real love is built in the everyday moments. 00:00-02:20 The Fur Coat Enters the Chat Shireen arrives in a full fur and Charles is stunned; the story behind how she got it is even wilder. 02:2-04:40 The 'Buy Nothing' Blessing A Facebook group, perfect timing, and a free fur coat that feels like divine provision. 04:40-07:00 “You Can’t Receive With a Closed Fist” Charles drops a quote (that may or may not be T.D. Jakes) and they unpack the magic of unexpected gifts. 07:00-09:00 Married to Medicine & Marriage Commentary Watching reality TV sparks a conversation about boundaries, friendships, and who gets to comment on your relationship. 09:00-12:00 Should Friends Give Relationship Advice? Charles explains why he minds his business, and Shireen admits she had to learn that lesson the hard way. 12:00-15:00 Complaints vs. Crisis Why venting doesn’t always mean disaster; and how to listen without absorbing someone else’s relationship energy. 15:00-17:30 Dating Advice vs. Marriage Advice Shireen draws a clear line: dating is flexible, marriage is commitment; and the guidance should reflect that. 17:30-20:00 The 80/20 Rule & Choosing Your 90% They break down focusing on what works instead of obsessing over the 10% that doesn’t. 20:00-23:00 Signature Annoying Habits From accountability avoidance to questioning directives; the couple lovingly calls each other out. 23:00-27:00 Money, Shoes & The Great Organizer Debate A $1,000 pair of Louboutins, a garage project, and a disagreement about hiring help. 27:00-31:00 | Clutter, Hoarding & Household Mental Load They unpack generational habits, home management, and the invisible labor that shapes daily life. 31:00-36:00 Cooking, Cleaning & Kitchen Chaos Charles cooks like a king and cleans like… absolutely not. Shireen testifies. 36:00-40:00 Feet Cuddling & Thermostat Wars Cold feet, warm bodies, and the eternal battle over the house temperature. 40:00-44:30 Protecting Your Partner & Public Commentary Why nobody gets to talk about your spouse; not friends, not castmates, not strangers online. 44:30 Vows, Reddit Drama & A 10‑Year Celebration The Kuykendolls tease their upcoming vow renewal, vow-writing rules (no ChatGPT allowed), and the joy of choosing each other again xoxo Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  8. Jan 21

    Home For The Holidays

    The holidays get real when you’re hosting two full families, juggling gift expectations, assigning rooms, and trying to keep the peace. In this episode, the Kuykendolls break down their first big Christmas in the new house — the joy, the chaos, the “Hunger Games” sleeping chart, and the sweet moments that made it all worth it. If you’ve ever tried to host during the holidays, you can relate!  0:00–2:00 - Beyoncé Date Night & Destiny’s Child Chaos; Shireen defends her vocals, Charles critiques, and they spiral into a Beyoncé/Kelly/Michelle debate. 2:00–3:40 - New Year Rules & “Elevation Information” Debuts; When is it too late to say Happy New Year? The couple sets the official cutoff and launches their new segment. 3:40–5:00 - Holiday Greetings, Inclusivity & December Etiquette; Why “Happy Holidays” is the safest bet, and how to avoid offending people during the season. 5:00–7:10 - The Africa Trip That Didn’t Happen; The plan for Ghana + Cape Town, why it fell through, and why staying home turned out to be the blessing they didn’t know they needed. 7:10–8:30 - Hosting Christmas in the New House; Inviting both families, rushing to furnish the house, and preparing for the biggest holiday gathering yet. 8:30–10:00 - Weeks of Visitors & The Bed‑and‑Breakfast Era; The house becomes a rotating inn, and the kids get to see both sides of the family together for the first time in years. 10:00–12:15 - How They Navigated Holidays While Dating; Food diplomacy, family priorities, and why splitting up for the holidays was never an option. 12:15–16:00 - Tradition vs. “New Age” Holiday Boundaries; The debate around creating your own nuclear‑family traditions vs. showing up for your people. 16:00–22:00 - The Housing Hunger Games: Who Gets a Room?; Assigning rooms, managing expectations, grandma guilt trips, hotel diplomacy, and the complicated holiday‑hosting matrix. 22:00–27:00 - Who Counts as an Adult? Gift‑Giving Rules; The official cutoff for receiving gifts, introducing White Elephant for adults, and the “new adults” stepping into their gifting era. 27:00–29:00 - CJ’s Generosity & The Spirit of Giving; A sweet moment: CJ chooses giving over receiving and surprises his parents with a thoughtful gift from his own savings. 29:00–33:00 - The Dior Saddlebag Mission; Charles’ Amsterdam layover adventure, the Chanel rejection, and the Christmas surprise that almost made Shireen cry. 33:00 - Final Reflections & Future Holiday Traditions; Gratitude, repairing family relationships, and the vision for an elevated White Elephant with friends next year. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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4.9
out of 5
99 Ratings

About

Hosts Charles Beloved and Shireen Kuykendoll talk marriage, family life, Black love, and entrepreneurship. Join them every Wednesday where they share their experiences and give the audience a taste of how they balance chaos with blessings.

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