The Sharegiving Secret: How to Survive Family Caregiving

Deborah Greenhut, PH.D.
  • 5.0 (2)
  • MENTAL HEALTH
  • UPDATED WEEKLY

The Sharegiving Secret provides practical advice so that caregivers don’t have to go it alone. Hosted by best-selling author of The Rational Caregiver, Deborah S. Greenhut, PhD, each episode shares caregivers’ highs and lows with listeners. Service providers and experienced family caregivers offer solutions you can use. Whether you are a caregiver or realize that someday you might be or need one, “The Sharegiving Secret” offers inspiring stories and lifelines from family caregivers. Join us weekly to discover the practical side of this labor of love. Let’s enlarge the circle of help.

  1. 1D AGO

    When Caregiving Begins Too Early: Dr. Eugene Manley on Advocacy, Health Equity, and Surviving the System

    What happens when caregiving begins before childhood is even finished? In this deeply human and eye-opening conversation, Dr. Eugene Manley Jr. shares what it was like to become a caregiver as a child—and how those early responsibilities shaped his empathy, career, and lifelong commitment to health equity. A biomedical scientist and founder of the STEM & Cancer Health Equity Foundation, Dr. Manley bridges lived experience and professional expertise as he reveals: How early caregiving forces children into adult rolesWhat happens when even highly educated patients are failed by the healthcare systemWhy caregivers need real-time advocates, not just paperworkHow burnout, income loss, and systemic bias disproportionately affect underserved familiesWhy storytelling, information-sharing, and community are survival tools for caregivers. Dr. Manley has actively turned lived caregiving into action through health equity work. Caregivers are not invisible—and their stories are not small. This episode is a reminder that advocacy begins with being seen, heard, and supported. BIO: Dr. Eugene Manley Jr. is a biomedical scientist, health equity advocate, and founder of the STEM & Cancer Health Equity Foundation. Raised in inner-city Detroit and shaped by early caregiving experiences, he now works to improve health literacy, diversify the STEM workforce, and reduce disparities in cancer care through education, advocacy, and community-centered programs. Links: STEM & Cancer Health Equity Foundation: info@secchq.orgSocial Media: STEMCCHQ (Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn)LinkedIn: Eugene Manley Jr., PhD Hashtags: #TheSharegivingSecret #CaregivingStories #HealthEquity #CaregiverAdvocacy #PatientRights #HealthcareJustice

    28 min

  2. 5D AGO

    Ep 56 Be Kind to Yourself: Why Caregivers Need the Primal Five to Survive

    Caregiving quietly asks people to disappear—and then praises them for it. In this episode of The Sharegiving Secret, host Deborah Greenhut, PhD speaks with Dr. Matthew Campbell, licensed psychologist and co-author of Our Primal Five, about why caregivers are uniquely vulnerable to depletion, isolation, and hopelessness—and what actually helps. Drawing from clinical work with dementia caregivers, personal family experience, and decades of research, Dr. Campbell introduces the Primal Five: sleep, sunlight, movement, social connection, and consumption. These are not luxuries, he argues, but biological requirements caregivers often abandon without realizing it. Together, Deborah and Matt explore: Why caregivers struggle to even hear advice meant for themselvesHow caregiving becomes invisible solo labor over timeWhy praise and faith language can unintentionally trap caregiversThe difference between depression and the far more dangerous state of hopelessnessHow families can spot early warning signs that a caregiver is in trouble This is a compassionate, practical, and deeply human conversation about restoring visibility, choice, and kindness—to the caregiver. Bio Dr. Matthew Campbell is a licensed psychologist, author, and founder of Our Primal 5, a practical self-care framework focused on the five foundations of mental and physical health: sleep, sunlight, movement, social connection, and consumption. With years of clinical experience, Dr. Campbell helps people cut through overwhelm and focus on small, sustainable behaviors that improve mood, energy, and resilience. His work bridges science and real life—offering structure without rigidity and progress without perfection. Dr. Campbell is the co-author of Our Primal 5: The Simple 5-Week Guide to Self-Care, and his mission is simple: help people feel better by doing less—but doing the right things consistently. Social Website: https://www.campbellps.com/our-primal-5 Book: https://a.co/d/8w3z5KX

    45 min

  3. JAN 14

    Ep 055 The Story You're Living Inside as a Caregiver

    Caregiving is shaped as much by the story we tell ourselves as by the tasks we perform. In this solo episode, Dr. Deborah Greenhut explores how unconscious caregiver narratives—hero, martyr, fixer, invisible one—quietly determine burnout, resentment, and motivation. Listeners are guided to examine the story they are living inside, identify where it no longer serves them, and begin revising it with clarity, self-respect, and choice. Caregivers rarely choose their role intentionally—but they do live inside a story about what that role means. In this episode, Deborah Greenhut introduces the idea that motivation, exhaustion, and even guilt are often consequences of the narrative a caregiver has inherited or adopted without consent. Using a coaching lens grounded in the Rational Caregiver framework, this episode helps listeners identify their dominant caregiving story, understand how it shapes behavior, and begin rewriting it in a way that restores agency. This is not about doing more—it’s about seeing differently. #CaregiverStory #CaregiverBurnout #CaregivingSupport #TheRationalCaregiver #CaregiverCoaching #CaregiverIdentity #CaregiverMotivation #FamilyCaregiving

    12 min
  4. Anchored by Vision — Supporting Young Adults Through Life’s Storms

    12/31/2025

    Anchored by Vision — Supporting Young Adults Through Life’s Storms

    How can vision anchor young adults through grief, stress, and uncertainty? Carey Conley shares powerful insights on supporting young adults with compassion, clarity, and hope. Key Topics CoveredWhy young adults face a “perfect storm” of mental health stressorsVision as an emotional anchor during adversitySupporting autonomy while staying emotionally presentHow parents can avoid projecting fear onto adult childrenGrief, suicide loss, and the power of shared storiesWhy vulnerability from adults builds trust with younger generationsCreating safe spaces for young adults to ask for help Carey's Bio: Carey Conley now travels the world and the country to virtual and live events helping men and women professionally and personally build their self-empowering skills by using her vision methodology. She shows them how to shed past pain, fear, and hardship, in order to manifest a beautiful life that’s within reach. Carey Conley’s personal story is full of extraordinary success and devastating tragedy. She lost her husband and son to suicide 3 years apart and was able to be strong for her daughter and to live her purpose that became her driving force. Those are the experiences that bring power to her message and help others achieve what they never thought was possible. Carey found her passion and ability to help men and women create, develop, and execute a rock-solid, bigger-than-life vision that propels them to succeed in all areas of life, including self-love, financial prosperity, a healthy lifestyle, caring relationships, a strong family, supreme confidence, and spiritual connection. She also co-authored a Bestselling book called ‘Keep Looking Up’ in 2019. https://www.linkedin.com/in/careyconleyinc/ https://shy-sky-602.myflodesk.com/ Hashtags: #SharegivingSecret #CaregiverSupport #YoungAdultMentalHealth #VisionAndPurpose #MentalHealthMatters #GriefSupport #ResilientFamilies #CaregiverVoices #ParentingAdultChildren #HopeAndHealing

    29 min
  5. The Silver Lining of Alzheimer’s: When Caregiving Becomes a Relationship of Pure Connection

    12/24/2025

    The Silver Lining of Alzheimer’s: When Caregiving Becomes a Relationship of Pure Connection

    When memory fades, does love disappear — or deepen? Author and caregiver Eliezer Sobel shares a raw, honest, and unexpectedly hopeful account of caring for his mother through 20 years of Alzheimer’s. This conversation explores identity loss, reframing grief, creative connection, and why emotional presence matters more than recognition. Not sugarcoated — and not without light. Eliezer Sobel is the author of The Silver Linings of Alzheimer’s: One Son’s Journey into the Mystery, a memoir chronicling his family’s long and complex experience with Alzheimer’s disease. A former writer, editor, and teacher, Eliezer became a full-time caregiver and care manager for his parents, navigating everything from hands-on care to managing a home-based caregiving team. His work explores connection beyond memory, reframing grief, and the human capacities that remain even as cognition fades. Links: https://www.facebook.com/eliezersobel https://www.linkedin.com/in/eliezersobel/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bo0Q0mOlpNo https://www.amazon.com/Clouds-Memory-Challenged-Adults-CLOUDS-Hardcover/dp/B00QM2OPNI/ref=sr_1_4?crid=DRRMLLVQT9VQ&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.tOiwRURzu-m4q3eRYjXXdfUJ4jhBLelca-9LNiltjsvEdGv2nkp5davrB3gzQT-LXFzsemDcTYbdCr7bwVhIeQ.3Ks-XR2IjWJWeaOZ4iWps652UOs3VOM01bXy7n9C-y8&dib_tag=se&keywords=Eliezer+sobel+author&qid=1766616328&sprefix=eliezer+sobel+author%2Caps%2C114&sr=8-4 https://www.amazon.com/Silver-Lining-Alzheimers-Journey-Mystery/dp/0997121734/ref=sr_1_1?content-id=amzn1.sym.5665599f-2cfd-42f8-a2cc-95846a3b1a33%3Aamzn1.sym.5665599f-2cfd-42f8-a2cc-95846a3b1a33&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.mE77PUuBlbb4i5saOx7AtDXDaDwYNhSTCUS0I5WPFMAVRsIPY_7i4n5OCBP4i1F3nTXoqmeHcQRQLsD7Eg6Yl3v5bX2Zi-Hl1xljCbAX8nVXLgk8yeHD_Vt9ZCHz6yFj5NbALye4rJhJIvZULzE0s3zZB96BNCuPEEBRfhMx8X64mfmR0i-r5njzSGO-ZVyEbTZFRQZrv14z0lxB7Tr1go8mhWGOSEk0suFZfW3C7Nk.OVeuZVWnQJnKuV3ab0AylhPc6LjRw5TcyfaPrjvXhGk&dib_tag=se&keywords=eliezer+sobel&pd_rd_r=3582805f-05b5-4122-8e6b-4a9b1ddfd365&pd_rd_w=T9PlK&pd_rd_wg=C7AiM&qid=1766616406&sr=8-1

    50 min

  6. 12/17/2025

    Carrying the Tiger: Tony Stewart on Living with Cancer, Grief, and Grace

    What happens when a single phone call changes everything? Author Tony Stewart joins The Sharegiving Secret to reflect on caregiving, anticipatory grief, and the unexpected moments of love and clarity that emerge in the face of terminal illness. Drawing from his memoir Carrying the Tiger, Tony shares how writing, community, and radical honesty helped him navigate cancer, loss, and life after caregiving. Tony Stewart has made award-winning films for colleges and universities (“A Union of People,” “Skidmore: Concurrence of Ideas”), written software that received rave reviews in The New York Times and the New York Daily News (“Tony Stewart’s Home Office”), designed a grants-management application that was used by three of the five largest charities in the world (“Riverside Grants”), and led the development of an international standard for the messages involved in buying and selling advertisements (“AdsML”) for which he spoke at conferences across Europe and North America. His memoir Carrying the Tiger won two Gold Medals at the 2025 Global Book Awards and is a Publishers Weekly Editor's Pick.  Tony and his late wife Lynn Kotula, a painter, traveled extensively in India and Southeast Asia, staying in small hotels off the beaten track and eating delicious food with their fingers when cutlery wasn’t available.  Inspired by the experience of writing Carrying the Tiger, Tony studied with David Kessler and is now a Certified Grief Educator.  Author of Carrying the Tiger: Living with Cancer, Dying with Grace, Finding Joy while Grieving Winner, GOLD MEDAL, Global Book Awards “A beautifully devastating memoir” – Publishers Weekly BookLife (Editor’s Pick) "A masterclass in facing life's hardest moments with grace." – IndieReader Social Media: Website: https://tonystewartauthor.com Instagram & Substack: Linked via website CaringBridge: https://www.caringbridge.org Keywords and Hashtags: #caregivingpodcast #cancercaregiving #anticipatorygrief #griefandloss #caregiverburnout #memoircaregiving #CarryingtheTiger #TonyStewartauthor #CaringBridge #caregivingsupport #lifeaftercaregiving #griestorytelling #caregivermentalhealth #hospiceandgrief #caregivercommunity

    40 min
  7. Behind the Helmet: Caring for the Families Who Care for NFL Players

    11/26/2025

    Behind the Helmet: Caring for the Families Who Care for NFL Players

    · This is the link to our health checklist which we mentioned several times: https://footballplayershealth.harvard.edu/for-former-players/tackling-personal-health/ · The NFL LifeLine can be found here: https://www.nfllifeline.org/ Episode Title: Behind the Helmet: Caring for the Families Who Care for NFL Players Podcast: The Sharegiving Secret Host: Deborah S. Greenhut, PhD Guests: Rachel Grashow, M.S., ScD – Director of Epidemiological Research Initiatives, Football Players Health Study at Harvard UniversityAlicia Whittington, MPH, PhD – Assistant Director of Engagement & Health Equity ResearchNiki Konstantinides, PhD – FEM-FL Co-lead, Postdoctoral ResearcherPaula Atkeson, MPH – Outreach and Engagement Coordinator(Christy Glass, PhD—discussed but not present) Social Media Links: LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/company/the-football-players-health-study-at-harvard-university X - https://x.com/PlayersStudy Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/PlayersStudy Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/playersstudy/ YouTube - www.youtube.com/@playersstudy Episode OverviewIn this powerful conversation, host Deborah Greenhut sits down with members of the Harvard Football Players Health Study (FPHS) and the FEM-FL project (Family Experiences Managing Football Lives) to explore the untold story of caregiving in professional football families. Drawing from cutting-edge epidemiological research, community-based engagement strategies, and the lived experiences of wives and partners of former NFL players, the team reveals what really happens after the game ends—and the stadium lights go dark. Together, they unpack the emotional, physical, and relational burden shouldered by sports spouses, offering practical tools, startling findings, and hopeful guidance for caregivers everywhere—whether supporting a former athlete, first responder, military veteran, or loved one navigating complex health needs. Key Themes & Insights1. Caregiver Burden Is Predictable—and PreventableNiki explains that caregiver burden is strongly predicted by:Number of relocationsPlayer’s lineman statusFear of CTECaregiver’s own healthMarital satisfaction levelsCaregivers reporting satisfaction in their marriage showed dramatically lower burden scores. 2. Post-Career Transitions Are a Critical Health WindowPaula emphasizes that families suddenly lose integrated medical support when players retire. Actionable resources—like FPHS checklists—help families build continuity of care. 3. Head Injury Isn’t the Whole StoryRachel highlights that treatable...

    59 min

  8. 10/31/2025

    When Time and Care Collide: Dementia Care in the Shutdown

    When the government shuts down, caregivers don’t get to. In this episode, author and advocate Deborah Greenhut explores how the ongoing federal shutdown affects dementia care — from delayed Medicaid reimbursements to halted Alzheimer’s research. She outlines a “calendar of disruptions” showing what happens in weeks 1–6 of the shutdown, with real stories from caregivers managing telehealth gaps, unpaid aides, and funding freezes. Listeners will learn how to prepare, where to find trustworthy updates, and how to protect home-based care from federal uncertainty. Because while Washington debates budgets, caregivers keep the world turning — one act of compassion at a time. Key Takeaways How shutdown timelines affect dementia services week by weekWhich programs continue vs. pause (Medicaid, SNAP, telehealth)Real-world caregiver examples and how to adaptAction steps: calendar tracking, backup planning, advocacyTrusted resources for timely updates and assistance Resources Mentioned NAMI Shutdown ResourcesNational Family Caregiver Support Program (ACL)HRSA – Maternal & Child Health / TelehealthMedicare Rights CenterElderCare LocatorKFF Health News – Project 2025 Overview https://substack.com/home/post/p-177525880 About Me: I have cared for many family members across the life span, experiencing the joys and challenges of child-rearing, the poignance of caring for parents, friends, and elder partners. I realized that I could not handle the stress of family caregiving 24/7/365. It was time for a new approach to caring. My health and happiness were slipping away. This is how Think to Thrive for Caregivers evolved. Let your mind meet your heart so you don’t lose track of your life. Connect with Me: https://www.deborahgreenhut.com/ https://www.linkedin.com/in/deborahgreenhut01/ Find my books here: https://www.amazon.com/stores/Deborah-S.-Greenhut/author/B001KI5BAU?ref=ap_rdr&isDramIntegrated=true&shoppingPortalEnabled=true&ccs_id=985b6dac-012d-4eb4-aabb-e15635ed3d7f Thanks for listening! Thanks so much for listening to our podcast! If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it using the social media buttons on this page. Do you have some feedback or questions about this episode? Leave a comment in the section below! Subscribe to the podcast If you would like to get automatic updates of new podcast episodes, you can subscribe...

    14 min
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The Sharegiving Secret provides practical advice so that caregivers don’t have to go it alone. Hosted by best-selling author of The Rational Caregiver, Deborah S. Greenhut, PhD, each episode shares caregivers’ highs and lows with listeners. Service providers and experienced family caregivers offer solutions you can use. Whether you are a caregiver or realize that someday you might be or need one, “The Sharegiving Secret” offers inspiring stories and lifelines from family caregivers. Join us weekly to discover the practical side of this labor of love. Let’s enlarge the circle of help.

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