crumbs from His table fellowship podcast

crumbs from His table

Prayers, essays, and poems read to you by the author crumbsfromhistable.substack.com

  1. 3h ago

    Morning Prayer and Philippians 1

    Starting today, we are prayerfully reading Philippians together. If you are able, please read and pray along with me. If you would like to study this passage for yourself, please keep listening after the prayer time. I’ve written and read the guidance I would offer if we were having a cup of tea together and you asked how to study God’s Word. And now for our prayer time— Call to Worship: “Blessed is the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavens in Christ. For he chose us in him, before the foundation of the world, to be holy and blameless in love before him. He predestined us to be adopted as sons through Jesus Christ for himself, according to the good pleasure of his will, to the praise of his glorious grace that he lavished on us in the Beloved One. In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of his grace that he richly poured out on us with all wisdom and understanding. He made known to us the mystery of his will, according to his good pleasure that he purposed in Christ as a plan for the right time — to bring everything together in Christ, both things in heaven and things on earth in him. In him we have also received an inheritance, because we were predestined according to the plan of the one who works out everything in agreement with the purpose of his will, so that we who had already put our hope in Christ might bring praise to his glory. In him you also were sealed with the promised Holy Spirit when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation, and when you believed.” Ephesians 1:3-13 CSB Let us confess our sins to Almighty God: Most merciful God, we confess that we have sinned against You this day, in thought, word, and deed; by what we have done, and by what we have left undone. We have not loved You with our whole hearts; we have not loved our neighbors as ourselves. We are truly sorry and we humbly repent. For the sake of Your Son Jesus Christ, have mercy on us and forgive us, that we may delight in Your will, and walk in Your ways, to the glory of Your Name. Grant to Your people pardon and peace, that in Your great mercy, we may be forgiven all our sins, and serve You with a quiet and contrite heart. In the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, Amen. (Anglican Book of Common Prayer) This is what the Word of God says: “If we say we do not bear the guilt of sin, we are deceiving ourselves and the truth is not in us. But if we confess our sins, he is faithful and righteous, forgiving us our sins and cleansing us from all unrighteousness.” 1 John 1:8-9 NET Now let us ask the Lord to help us in the reading of a chapter His Word: Almighty God, I earnestly ask you for such deeper fellowship of the Holy Spirit, who speaks in the blessed Scriptures, that when I open them, I may perceive his mind in what I read, and immediately hear in them his voice to myself. I ask you for a quicker understanding in spiritual things, for more desire to understand, a fuller perception of your promise in the church, that I may become teachable, and may love that by which you will teach me. Amen.  Henry Wotherspoon Let us listen together to this portion from God’s Word: Philippians 1, Christian Standard Bible Paul and Timothy, servants of Christ Jesus: To all the saints in Christ Jesus who are in Philippi, including the overseers and deacons. 2 Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ. 3 I give thanks to my God for every remembrance of you, 4 always praying with joy for all of you in my every prayer, 5 because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now. 6 I am sure of this, that he who started a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. 7 Indeed, it is right for me to think this way about all of you, because I have you in my heart, and you are all partners with me in grace, both in my imprisonment and in the defense and confirmation of the gospel. 8 For God is my witness, how deeply I miss all of you with the affection of Christ Jesus. 9 And I pray this: that your love will keep on growing in knowledge and every kind of discernment, 10 so that you may approve the things that are superior and may be pure and blameless in the day of Christ, 11 filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ to the glory and praise of God. 12 Now I want you to know, brothers and sisters, that what has happened to me has actually advanced the gospel, 13 so that it has become known throughout the whole imperial guard, and to everyone else, that my imprisonment is because I am in Christ. 14 Most of the brothers have gained confidence in the Lord from my imprisonment and dare even more to speak the word fearlessly. 15 To be sure, some preach Christ out of envy and rivalry, but others out of good will. 16 These preach out of love, knowing that I am appointed for the defense of the gospel; 17 the others proclaim Christ out of selfish ambition, not sincerely, thinking that they will cause me trouble in my imprisonment. 18 What does it matter? Only that in every way, whether from false motives or true, Christ is proclaimed, and in this I rejoice. Yes, and I will continue to rejoice 19 because I know this will lead to my salvation[e] through your prayers and help from the Spirit of Jesus Christ. 20 My eager expectation and hope is that I will not be ashamed about anything, but that now as always, with all courage, Christ will be highly honored in my body, whether by life or by death. 21 For me, to live is Christ and to die is gain. 22 Now if I live on in the flesh, this means fruitful work for me; and I don’t know which one I should choose. 23 I am torn between the two. I long to depart and be with Christ—which is far better— 24 but to remain in the flesh is more necessary for your sake. 25 Since I am persuaded of this, I know that I will remain and continue with all of you for your progress and joy in the faith, 26 so that, because of my coming to you again, your boasting in Christ Jesus may abound. 27 Just one thing: As citizens of heaven, live your life worthy of the gospel of Christ. Then, whether I come and see you or am absent, I will hear about you that you are standing firm in one spirit, in one accord, contending together for the faith of the gospel, 28 not being frightened in any way by your opponents. This is a sign of destruction for them, but of your salvation—and this is from God. 29 For it has been granted to you on Christ’s behalf not only to believe in him, but also to suffer for him, 30 since you are engaged in the same struggle that you saw I had and now hear that I have. This is the Word of the Lord. Thanks be to God. Continuing in our prayers for the day: O you who are full of compassion, I commit and commend myself unto you, in whom I am, and live, and know. Be the goal of my pilgrimage, and my rest by the way. Let my soul take refuge from the crowding turmoil of worldly thoughts beneath the shadow of your wings; let my heart, this sea of restless waves, find peace in you, O God. Amen. Augustine Lord, I am willing (to be made willing) To receive what you send, To do without what you withhold, To relinquish what you take, To suffer anything you inflict, To do what you command, And to be what you ask me to be, At any cost, Now and forever, Amen. (Anonymous) God, who hast called us to open our hand, and thou wouldest fill it, and we would not: open thou not only our hand, but our heart also; that we may know nothing but thee, count all things lost in comparison of thee, and endeavour to be made like unto thee; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Jeremy Taylor Intercession My Lord and my God, This day I offer you my thoughts, feelings, words, and actions; My trials and my joys; My desires and my disappointments; My worries and my thanks; My loved ones, My enemies, And myself, For Your glory and every good, loving design You have for us. Please … Get full access to crumbs from His table fellowship at crumbsfromhistable.substack.com/subscribe

  2. Oct 6

    Parable of the Waiting Room

    A peek into our time capsule… The sparsely adorned walls, uncomfortable chairs, and odd assortment of magazines scattered on the various tables confirmed that the woman was in the right place. She signed in at the front desk and sat down in an empty chair to wait her turn. Rebuking herself for forgetting something to do in the meantime, she picked up a magazine and absentmindedly began leafing through it while she took note of the others ahead of her. Nestled in one corner of the room was a bright-eyed couple laughing and talking over the contents of their own magazine. “Amazing,” she thought. “To look at them, you’d think they were waiting for a Christmas present, not a needle and an oversized bill.” Drawn into listening in spite of herself, she discovered they were picking out furniture for a baby’s nursery. They must have months yet to wait, for their glowing faces were the only visible signs so far. Looking down at her own bare left hand, she shifted in her chair, covering her fingers with the magazine in her lap. At her age, she probably would never know their joy. The nurse’s voice jolted her out of her reverie, and the laughing couple followed her out of the room. Taking up the magazine in earnest, the woman had nearly finished reading an article on the latest Nobel Prize recipients when the bell over the door jingled. She looked up to see a newcomer enter, a bit clumsily due to her newly expanded waistline. Scanning the now-full room, the woman realized the seat next to her was the only vacant one. “Great,” she thought, “and this one looks like a talker.” Consequently, when the expectant mother quietly sat down with only a smile of greeting, her observer was so surprised she stared as the newcomer lifted a bag into the remains of her lap, carefully extracted the beginnings of a tiny sweater, and commenced knitting. Never even looking at her watch, she quickly became absorbed in her work, as though content to wait for hours. Soon the nurse called her own name and she left the waiting room, quickly to forget the scenes of the morning in the business at hand. We, however, remain “in the waiting room.” For us, that means waiting to move to India. For others of you, it means waiting for a baby to come, or waiting to be married, or a return to good health, or waiting for a better job, or… Regardless of our individual circumstances, we are all waiting for the return of our Lord Jesus Christ and our true Home in His presence. So how do we spend our time in the waiting room? Do we fret and chafe that our hopes are delayed? (All too often the answer is yes.) Let us remember, though, that God is never wrong and never late. Whatever my situation in life, it has been especially chosen by Him to make me more like Jesus. Our waiting room becomes His classroom, designed to teach us and mold our character. The people of the parable illustrate some of the lessons Amore and I are learning in our waiting room. Like the first woman, we are learning acceptance of our present lot in life. We don’t know with certainty when – or even if – God’s will may take us to India [dear reader, He didn’t, except for a short teaching trip], but we can know God’s will for today, whether that means dealing with computer problems and dirty dishes or studying, teaching, and writing. It is tempting to waste the opportunities for joy in this part of the path in wishing for whatever lies around the next bend in the road. I have often needed the reminder in Jim Elliot’s words: “Wherever you are, be all there. Live to the hilt every situation you believe to be the will of God.” It would be a tragedy to miss the Beth-Marie’s ice cream and mochas right here in Denton simply because they are not samosas and chai! Like the couple in the story, we are also learning to watch expectantly… NOT for a child, but for our coming move. This comes more naturally to Amore than to me, probably due to his background as a missionary kid-turned-missionary. In fact, we have learned that change is his comfort zone! For me on the other hand, change causes much anxiety unless my thoughts are centered on this very small animal’s Very Big God. Granted, our expectation of moving to India may come to pass much more slowly than we anticipate, or perhaps not at all. Our hope lies not so much in fulfillment of the goal itself as in God’s unfailing faithfulness and goodness. At this writing, things are gradually coming together for us to move this year, but we are confident that if the Lord shuts the door to India, He will give us bread not a stone. Finally, as we wait and watch to see what God will do, we are learning to work diligently at what God gives us here, both in the daily responsibilities of life and in specific tasks to prepare for a new culture. Concerning the former, Amore still has computer responsibilities at the office, along with taking a couple of men through Bible Study Methods, discipling another, and substituting at other Biblical Training Center for Pastors (BTCP) classes on a pretty regular basis. His part of the curriculum committee has been both demanding and rewarding, as well. I mostly work as his administrative assistant, cook, and housekeeper (and wife, lol). As time permits, I meet with a few precious “little sisters” to encourage them in their pursuit of God. Also, I am trying to wrap up a study of Esther to teach on our upcoming SE Asia trip. More intentional India preparation has been taking a lot of time as well. We have continued meeting weekly with our teammate, M. S., resumed cultural study, and begun study of the Hindi language. The Lord has also kept us busy keeping up with doors He’s opened to meet with friends and acquaintances who desire to participate in this ministry through prayer and/or giving. It has been very encouraging to see His hand at work to build our support team and link us with the people of His choice as we simply focus on Him and obedience in what He assigns day by day. At the current pace, we hope to make the overseas move in early fall, contingent on support, visas, etc. Basically, that’s “whazzup” with us. What about you? For all of us, “let us take care how we…” wait. (From Rose Garden Gazette, April 2000) Coming back to 2026, I feel these thoughts have aged pretty well, even though we went to Thailand, not India, and we only stayed a year because of my health collapse due to lupus. We waited for things that never happened, and ensuing years brought so very many big changes we didn’t even know to anticipate. This old essay came back to my thoughts recently as we spent most of the summer waiting for things connected to our move. We are fairly settled in the new place, although there are still frequent scavenger hunts to locate this or that, and not many of the pictures have been hung. We are still waiting, however. Amore and I are waiting for our old house to sell, and it has been a longer wait than anticipated. Prayers are appreciated for the right buyer soon, and for someone who will love the house and garden and continue to care for them well. You may be waiting for something yourself: a job, a college acceptance, a prior authorization, a prodigal’s return, a diagnosis, a cure, news of all kinds. May the Lord sustain your hope in Him in all our waiting, and especially the groaning wait for His return. The Scottish-South African pastor Andrew Murray (1828-1917) wrote a 31-day devotional called Waiting on God. Please pray with me using his words from that book. Blessed Father! We humble beseech Thee, let none that wait on Thee be ashamed; no, not one. Some are weary, and the time of waiting appears long. And some are feeble, and scarcely know how to wait. And some are so entangled in the effort of their prayers and their work, they think that they can find no time to wait continually. Father, teach us all how to wait. Teach us to think of Thee, the God of all waiting ones. Father! Let none that wait on Thee be ashamed, for Jesus’ sake. Amen. If the Lord moves you to support my writing, one-time encouragement gifts can be made through the following link. You may also pledge toward a paid subscription, if I turn those on. https://buymeacoffee.com/crumbsfromhistable Also, if you are reading or hearing this October 6 or 7, 2026, I have free trials to give away for Amazon Prime, Audible, and Kindle Unlimited. Here are those links, for those not yet subscribed: Amazon Prime Audible Kindle Unlimited (Those links and the Murray book link are affiliate links and yield me a small commission at no cost to you.) Prayer is the most important support and enables me to keep writing through chronic illness, cancer, and every other adventure Aslan sends. Courage, dear hearts! Get full access to crumbs from His table fellowship at crumbsfromhistable.substack.com/subscribe

  3. Sep 18

    A Prayer for a Life-Changing Diagnosis

    So as not to worry you, I myself do not have a new chronic diagnosis or cancer recurrence, thanks be to God. However, I have heard of more new diagnoses these last 2 or 3 years than in any other period of my life. Not yet having written a prayer for such occasions, I have been simmering one for any who have need. Your feedback is welcome. Please let me know if there are specific omissions to supply in future drafts or in future prayers on the same topic. Courage, dear hearts. God of all comfort, God who heals:I bring You the grief and relief,the anxiety, overwhelm, and lonelinessof this new diagnosis. Thank You that this has not surprised You;thank You that it can neither separate me from Your lovenor thwart Your purposes for my life,nor diminish my value in Your sight. Father of mercies, Great Physician:Lead me to wise, skilled, compassionate doctorswho will not minimize, psychologize, or dismiss my symptoms,but faithfully fulfil their sworn duty of care. Send one or two loyal companions,undeterred by the chronicity of suffering,not seeking to fix, but willing to stay,steady in the unsteadiness of my path.Hold up those who hold up my arms in this battle. Take from me this bitter cup of suffering if You will;if not, sweeten my Marah with Your cross and communion.Enlighten my eyes to see my scars as Your faithful love inscribed on my body—”Hither by Thy help I come”—As a point of communion with the eternally nail-scarred risen Christ.Let me know You in this infirmityin ways I could not receive without it. You are good in this;You are good to me:You are the best of friends,my soul’s Physician,who will never abandon or failme, for Jesus’ sake. Amen. You may also find encouragement in these posts from the archives: Jesus and Autoimmune Disease And Thirteen Lessons from 13 Years of Writing Through Chronic Illness Get full access to crumbs from His table fellowship at crumbsfromhistable.substack.com/subscribe

  4. Aug 5

    Daleth

    When my soul clings to the dust, Let me cling to Your testimonies! Your Word is water for my parched soul, Honeyed bread for my weary heart, Breath for my fainting spirit. Lead me in the way of faithfulness, To love and love and love And follow Your glorious Word. Enlarge my heart to run after You When You lead the way. Deliver me from the shame and Reproach which I dread. Deliver me from dread of man And fill me with dread awe of You. Hold me fast, Lord, to Yourself and Your Word. Hold me up, that I might not fall away. Hold me close, for the way is hard, And only Your love holds my melting soul together. Small Life Update Dear Crumbles, My apologies for neglecting you so in recent weeks. The above was actually composed around the time the last post was published, but I haven’t managed to get the photo captions and recording added to bring it across the finish line. We are in the midst of a major life transition, namely, selling my dad’s house and our house and buying a home together in a different nearby town. All things considered, it has gone very well. We are grateful for the new place and all the things on our wish list which it affords. Gradually, we are exploring the new neighborhood and getting our bearings. Moose Tracks is very happy with his live-in Grandpaw and bigger backyard, although the Lunch Lady still insists on swimming in his big outside water bowl. ;) The upheaval notwithstanding, this week is our anniversary, yours and mine: 16 years of the crumbs blog, beginning at crumbsfromhistable.com and now here. I couldn’t resist peeking up from the labyrinth of boxes (diminishing but not gone) to say hello and well met, friends. There are so many things I want to write and say to you, but this must suffice for now. How are things in your neck of the woods? Is your household preparing for the new school year? How is your Bible reading going? Have you listened to any unpausable audiobooks lately that would make good company for unpacking and household chores? I pray this finds you as well as may be. If you are a brother or sister in chronic illness, may the Lord give you a stable or improving baseline and protect you from all injuries and illnesses that might cause a crash. May you know the love of God in every situation and circumstance. I’ll close with a brief prayer from the Puritan Thomas Watson: O God, You are our God: our strong tower, our fountain of living water, our Father, a Father of mercies, an everlasting Father in heaven. O God, You are our God, by Your grace planted in us, and by the pledge of Your Spirit. May He stamp the imprint of holiness in our hearts; embroidering and bespangling our souls, making them glorious within. May He, by His magnetic virtue, draw our hearts to you: our paradise of delight and our chief treasure! May our hearts be so chained to You that nothing else can enchant us or draw us from You. Though our flesh be on earth, may our hearts be in heaven. When You say to our souls, “You are mine,” may our souls answer: “Lord, we are Yours; all I have is at Your service; my head shall be Yours to study You; my tongue shall be Yours to praise You.” O God, You are our God. Thanks for reading crumbs from His table fellowship! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work. Get full access to crumbs from His table fellowship at crumbsfromhistable.substack.com/subscribe

  5. Jun 1

    A Prayer for the Loss of a Beloved Pet

    N.B.: Moose Tracks is healthy at this writing. Multiple friends have recently lost dear pets. This post is for y’all. A Prayer Father of life, Creator of all creatures great and small: Thank You for the good gift of our heart animals, the creature companions who help us better understand Your love. You know the tally of each sparrow’s days and the quota of tail wags, walks, belly rubs, and purrs for each dog and cat we love. You know how many skins each reptile sheds, how many canters around each horse’s paddock, how many gambols of each goat, how many bubbles from each fish. You also know how big is the hole left when our beloved pet’s days come to an end. It hurts, and the memories of those final moments can feel stronger than all the good that came before. Pour in comfort that overflows the cavern of grief. Help us to look to You in our sadness, for every good thing in our precious animals is an arrow pointing to You. Keep our hearts open to love, despite this intense reminder that love means pain too. Lord, we wait earnestly for the restoration of all things, when You will wipe away every tear and death will be no more. There all mourning will be comforted; there all sorrow and sighing will flee. Nothing will be lacking for our joy, and everything will be provided for our joy. God of lilies and sparrows, look with tender mercy on our grief, and send plentiful reminders that You are with us in the middle of it and treasure us infinitely more than we love our creature companions. In Jesus’ name, we lift our grief and gratitude. Amen. The Electing Love of God and the Ebony Dog Dogs pick their people, or so they say. Once upon a time, A black super-dachshund named Rex, Left at a shelter so long the volunteers feared it was permanent, Chose me to be his Person. Before I had done anything for him, good or bad, Before I changed his name to Ebony, With the inscrutability of grace, He picked me.   To the Ebony Dog, I was never too much, Even when I was. He drew all the closer to my tears, Kissing them away from my face. He wagged his tail with my laughter. He nestled against my leg or belly In my hours upon hours of physical therapy exercises. He never bored of my company, Not even with months on the sofa And years mostly in the house. He made the love and companionship of God Tangible to me in the funerals, The heartbreak, The five surgeries in five years, The anxieties, The upheavals Of his decade as the canine of the couch. He loved the people I loved, But only because I loved them. His favorite place to be was at my side. No matter what.   To the Ebony Dog, I was never too little, Even when I was. He consented to Amore walking him without me, But he sulked all the way to the turn toward home And strained at the leash the rest of the way. Even in those final days When he collapsed in the living room Before my shocked and stricken eyes, And I couldn’t lift him off the floor where he'd fallen, Into the car, to drive him to the vet, As I rocked myself and wept, Waiting for help to come to help us both, He tried to wag his tail when I reached down to stroke his ears Or tried without success to find the place of pain. I couldn’t help my most constant companion, My de facto emotional support dog, In his time of greatest need, But there he was, telling me It would be all right.   That last morning in the vet’s office, My weakened, struggling dog, Who would normally be trembling with anxiety And hiding under a chair, Resisted us, tried to jump off the table And get away from the hands trying to help him, To ease his suffering. I told my mother afterward, And her response was instant: “He didn’t want to leave you.” “You think he knew that was what was happening?” “Yes. He was a very perceptive dog. He never did like being separated from you.”   His constant, lavish, undeserved, undeterred affection, With the inscrutability of grace, Chose me To be his Person. It was one of the greatest earthly gifts I’ve known in seven weeks of years of life. In his love I read a parable of The unconditional, electing love of God. To Him I am never too much (Because He is always bigger), Never too little (Because He is always enough), Always accepted and acceptable in the Beloved, Chosen and blameless in His eyes. His affection is constant, unfailing, Not bound by dog years or pages on a calendar, Not excluded by quarantine or locked doors. Though the Ebony Dog has left me, The God he pointed to never will. He stopped at nothing to be with me— Becoming human flesh, Giving His only Son, Showing me my sin and His salvation, Birthing faith in my heart— To unite me to Himself forever. Who, indeed, shall separate me from Him? Get full access to crumbs from His table fellowship at crumbsfromhistable.substack.com/subscribe

  6. May 22

    Even If

    With God, We don’t have to redact our wrestlings, Airbrush our mascara trails, Mute our howls of anguish, Bury our fears. Whatever the heights or depths Of our feelings, He can bear them. Whether I jump for joy Or collapse on the closet floor, Sobbing, Or pound puny fists on His chest, He invites me to come In all my raw reality. Even better, He desires me to come; He treasures my tears in his bottle, Records my sorrows in His book, Dances with my joys. He is brighter than my darkest days, Bigger than my heaviest burdens, Eternal in His love and mercy and Justice and holiness. Because He is the Lord And my Lord, Joy is my inheritance forever, Even if the earthly worst should come For now. “Though the fig tree does not bud And there is no fruit on the vines, though the olive crop fails and the fields produce no food, though the flocks disappear from the pen and there are no herds in the stalls, yet I will celebrate in the Lord; I will rejoice in the God of my salvation! The Lord my Lord is my strength; he makes my feet like those of a deer and enables me to walk on mountain heights! For the choir director: on stringed instruments.” ‭‭Habakkuk‬ ‭3‬:‭17‬-‭19‬ ‭CSB‬‬ [The brown and white bird with golden eye, perched on the black metal garden fence, is a brown thrasher. We have enjoyed its visits to Wingshadow this spring, despite its apparent dislike of paparazzi. In size, it resembles a robin.] Get full access to crumbs from His table fellowship at crumbsfromhistable.substack.com/subscribe

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Prayers, essays, and poems read to you by the author crumbsfromhistable.substack.com