No Shrinking Violets Podcast for Women

Mary Rothwell

No Shrinking Violets is all about what it truly means for women to take up their space in the world – mind, body and spirit. Mary Rothwell, licensed therapist and certified integrative mental health practitioner, has seen women “stay small” and fit into the space in life that they have been conditioned to believe they deserve. Drawing on 35 years in the mental health field and from her perspective as a woman who was often told to "stay in your lane," Mary discusses how early experiences, society and sometimes our own limiting beliefs can convince us that living inside guardrails is the best -- or only -- option. She'll explore how to recognize our unique essential nature and how to use that to empower a new narrative.Through topics that span psychology, friendships, nature and even gut-brain health, Mary creates a space that is inspiring and authentic - where she celebrates the intuition and power of women who want to chart their own course and program their own GPS. Mary's topics will include sleep and supplements and nutrition and how to live like a plant. (Yes, you read that right - the example of plants is often the most insightful path to knowing what we truly need to feel fulfilled). She’ll talk about setting boundaries, communicating, and relationships, and explore mental health and wellness: trauma and resilience, how our food impacts our mood and the power of simple daily habits. And so much more! As a gardener, Mary knows that violets have been misjudged for centuries and are actually one of the most resilient and ecologically important plants in her native garden. Like violets, women are often underestimated, and they can even mistake their unique gifts for weaknesses. Join Mary to explore all the ways the vibrant and strong violet is an example for finding fulfillment in our own lives.

  1. Do You Have Hidden Beliefs that Impact Your Thoughts and Feelings? - Part 2

    2D AGO

    Do You Have Hidden Beliefs that Impact Your Thoughts and Feelings? - Part 2

    Thoughts or comments? Send us a text! We finish our series on Albert Ellis’s irrational ideas and the hidden beliefs they create in daily life. We focus on avoidance, dependence, the grip of the past, people-pleasing, perfectionism, and emotional regulation so you can spot what’s driving your reactions and choose a healthier response.  • why avoiding discomfort makes problems bigger and burns mental energy  • how the belief that someone will rescue you keeps you stuck and anxious  • separating past setbacks from your future identity and choices  • letting other adults own their feelings while you hold your boundaries  • dropping the myth of one perfect solution and taking imperfect action  • building emotional regulation by finding the belief under the feeling  If you want to be on my launch team and have the ability to get my book early before anyone else, you can sign up at the link in the show notes. It’s maryrothwell.net/natureknows.  Support the show Sign up for the launch team for my book, Nature Knows, and get free insider news and surprises at https://maryrothwell.net/natureknows Comments about this episode? Suggestions for a future episode? Email me directly at NSVpodcast@gmail.com.  Want to be a guest on No Shrinking Violets Podcast for Women? Send Mary Rothwell a message on PodMatch, here: https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/noshrinkingviolets Follow me on Facebook and Instagram, and check out my website!

    21 min
  2. Midlife Desire: How Honest Conversations Revive Intimacy And Rewrite Sexual Scripts

    MAR 26

    Midlife Desire: How Honest Conversations Revive Intimacy And Rewrite Sexual Scripts

    Thoughts or comments? Send us a text! Sex shouldn’t feel like a performance review you’re destined to fail. We pull back the curtain on the quiet pressures that keep women from asking for what they want, then rebuild intimacy on a foundation of comfort, consent, and curiosity. With licensed marriage and family therapist and certified sex therapist Keri Green, we explore how midlife bodies and busy lives change desire—and why that doesn’t have to mean the end of a satisfying sex life. We start by dismantling the narrow scripts many of us inherited: that intimacy equals penetration, that arousal is instant, and that a kiss must escalate. Keri offers simple, direct language to set boundaries without killing the mood and shows how “comfort first, pleasure second” can transform encounters. We get practical about menopause, lubrication, erection variability, and anxiety loops that shut down arousal. You’ll hear real-world strategies like keeping lube on the nightstand, slowing down foreplay, and agreeing on Plan B options when things shift mid‑moment so connection doesn’t collapse into silence. Beyond techniques, we redefine intimacy as a spectrum—cooking together, lingering conversations, shared laughter—that restores safety and play. Keri explains why confidence often beats chemistry at 50, how mindful showers and body awareness rekindle self-trust, and how to give kind feedback using everyday analogies. We also make a case for novelty: music, lighting, textures, and yes, sex toys as any element that adds pleasure and ease. If you’ve ever worried that wanting closeness will be mistaken for obligation, this conversation hands you the scripts and skills to change that pattern. Ready to replace pressure with play and performance with presence? Listen now, then share this episode with a friend who needs a kinder map for midlife intimacy. If the show resonates, follow, rate, and leave a review—your support helps more listeners find honest, hopeful conversations about sex and relationships. Book mentioned: Come As You Are by Emily Nagoski You can find Keri here: https://kerigreenlmft.com/ Support the show Sign up for the launch team for my book, Nature Knows, and get free insider news and surprises at https://maryrothwell.net/natureknows Comments about this episode? Suggestions for a future episode? Email me directly at NSVpodcast@gmail.com.  Want to be a guest on No Shrinking Violets Podcast for Women? Send Mary Rothwell a message on PodMatch, here: https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/noshrinkingviolets Follow me on Facebook and Instagram, and check out my website!

    54 min
  3. Do You Have Hidden Beliefs that Impact Your Thoughts and Feelings? - Part 1

    MAR 23

    Do You Have Hidden Beliefs that Impact Your Thoughts and Feelings? - Part 1

    Thoughts or comments? Send us a text! We unpack six classic irrational beliefs from CBT and rational emotive therapy and show how they fuel anxiety, perfectionism, anger, and people-pleasing. We also share practical ways to test the evidence, make a plan, and stop giving everyday setbacks the power to ruin your day.  • beliefs as the foundation for thoughts, feelings, and actions  • why the word irrational can feel judgmental, especially toward women  • needing everyone’s approval as a trap that creates paralysis  • tying self-worth to constant competence and achievement  • labeling people as villains and wasting energy on punishment fantasies  • awfulizing when plans go wrong and choosing problem solving instead  • giving external events control over your mood and reclaiming your power  • worrying about danger as rumination that steals the present moment  • using planning, mindfulness, grounding, and evidence testing to cope  If you want to be one of the first people to be able to get your hands on my book, you need to be on my launch team. You simply go to maryrothwell.net/natureknows, and it's a quick sign up, just your first name and your email.  Support the show Sign up for the launch team for my book, Nature Knows, and get free insider news and surprises at https://maryrothwell.net/natureknows Comments about this episode? Suggestions for a future episode? Email me directly at NSVpodcast@gmail.com.  Want to be a guest on No Shrinking Violets Podcast for Women? Send Mary Rothwell a message on PodMatch, here: https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/noshrinkingviolets Follow me on Facebook and Instagram, and check out my website!

    15 min
  4. Midlife, Menopause, And The Power of Gathering

    MAR 19

    Midlife, Menopause, And The Power of Gathering

    Thoughts or comments? Send us a text! What if midlife isn’t a slow fade but a bright second spring? We sit down with life coach and community builder Cheryl Dillon to talk honestly about perimenopause, menopause, and the unexpected freedom that comes when we stop pretending and start being seen. From hot flashes and insomnia to weight changes and mood swings, we unpack the physical and emotional shifts with compassion and clarity—and then go further, into the deeper work of self-trust, friendship, and purpose. Cheryl shares the story behind Connected Hearts, her in-person membership for women in North County San Diego, built for deeper conversations, playful joy, and honest support. We explore why in-person circles feel safer than social media, how confidentiality and shared energy invite vulnerability, and the way one brave share can unlock relief for everyone in the room. You’ll hear practical ideas for soothing the inner critic, choosing clothing and care that fit who you are now, and replacing apology-filled speech with language that honors your voice. We also dive into the hidden load many women carry: decades of doing for others, autopilot expectations, and the comparison that thrives in silence. Cheryl offers simple entry points—curiosity, tiny experiments, and reflection prompts—to help you rediscover what you want when the dust finally settles. Along the way, we touch on favorite resources like How to Do the Work by Dr. Nicole LePera and Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents, and how coaching and newsletters can keep momentum going between meetings. If you’ve been craving real connection, kinder self-talk, and a path that feels beautifully your own, this conversation will meet you where you are and invite you forward. Listen, share with a friend who needs it, and if it helps, leave a review and FOLLOW my show! You can find Cheryl HERE https://www.funderfulexperiences.com/ Support the show Sign up for the launch team for my book, Nature Knows, and get free insider news and surprises at https://maryrothwell.net/natureknows Comments about this episode? Suggestions for a future episode? Email me directly at NSVpodcast@gmail.com.  Want to be a guest on No Shrinking Violets Podcast for Women? Send Mary Rothwell a message on PodMatch, here: https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/noshrinkingviolets Follow me on Facebook and Instagram, and check out my website!

    41 min
  5. Is Visualizing a Positive Outcome Effective?

    MAR 16

    Is Visualizing a Positive Outcome Effective?

    Thoughts or comments? Send us a text! We talk through a simple shift that changes how we handle anxiety: stop mentally rehearsing the worst and start practicing success. We break down outcome visualization versus process visualization and show how vivid, step by step mental rehearsal can help you feel calmer and perform better.  • defining visualization as mental rehearsal  • noticing the default habit of worst case images  • why imagining failure increases anxiety through brain activation  • how athletes use sports psychology visualization for better results  • outcome visualization and making it sensory and vivid  • process visualization as the most effective approach  • practical walkthroughs for job interviews, first dates, raises, and exercise habits  • flipping the script from worry to prepared confidence  • a quick life update and a local coffee recommendation  I would love to hear your coffee favorites  Support the show Sign up for the launch team for my book, Nature Knows, and get free insider news and surprises at https://maryrothwell.net/natureknows Comments about this episode? Suggestions for a future episode? Email me directly at NSVpodcast@gmail.com.  Want to be a guest on No Shrinking Violets Podcast for Women? Send Mary Rothwell a message on PodMatch, here: https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/noshrinkingviolets Follow me on Facebook and Instagram, and check out my website!

    11 min
  6. From Relationship Ambivalence To Clarity: Ways To Decide Whether To Stay Or Go

    MAR 12

    From Relationship Ambivalence To Clarity: Ways To Decide Whether To Stay Or Go

    Thoughts or comments? Send us a text! Love should feel honest, not hazy. We sit down with Dr. Merideth Thompson, founder of Partner Lab, to unpack how data-driven insights turn relationship confusion into clarity—whether you’re looking to strengthen a good partnership, repair a drifting one, or leave a harmful dynamic safely. Drawing on research across thousands of couples, Merideth breaks down the surprising heavy-hitters that predict long-term health: perceived partner commitment, perceived partner satisfaction, your own sexual satisfaction, responsiveness to bids for connection, and low controlling conflict—not just “better communication.” Together we explore ambivalence as more than indecision; it’s a signal worth studying. Merideth shares the moment her body knew before her mind did, and how listening to dread, tension, and relief can guide the next right step. We dive into repair done right—being heard before fixing the problem—plus a practical way to reduce the daily micro-ruptures that screens and stress create. You’ll learn why compromise often disappoints both people, and how a simple needs-first approach (think zest vs. juice) can deliver smarter solutions with less resentment. You’ll also get a walk-through of Merideth’s Clarity Matrix, a two-by-two that separates what you can control from what you can’t and maps helpful vs. harmful patterns. We talk scripts for naming needs without blame, how to be “hard on the problem and soft on the person,” and how to use future-self checks to decide if staying aligns with your values. For listeners facing shame around divorce or fear of “failing,” we offer a new frame: a relationship can fail without you being a failure—and modeling healthy love is a profound gift to children. If this episode helped you see your relationship more clearly, follow the show, share it with a friend, and leave a quick review so more people can find it. Your story might be the spark someone else needs. You can find Merideth at https://www.mypartnerlab.co/ Support the show Sign up for the launch team for my book, Nature Knows, and get free insider news and surprises at https://maryrothwell.net/natureknows Comments about this episode? Suggestions for a future episode? Email me directly at NSVpodcast@gmail.com.  Want to be a guest on No Shrinking Violets Podcast for Women? Send Mary Rothwell a message on PodMatch, here: https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/noshrinkingviolets Follow me on Facebook and Instagram, and check out my website!

    50 min
  7. From Codependence To Clarity: Creating Healthy Boundaries

    MAR 5

    From Codependence To Clarity: Creating Healthy Boundaries

    Thoughts or comments? Send us a text! What if the problem isn’t that your boundaries are too soft, but that you were taught they had to be walls? We open this conversation by replacing the brick-and-mortar myth with a living metaphor: doors with windows, sensors, and keypads—flexible limits that protect your peace while keeping connection possible. Together with boundaries coach and recovery podcaster Barb Nangle, we trace the path from codependence and people‑pleasing to clarity and self‑trust. Barb shares the “flashbulb” moments that came through Al‑Anon, CODA, and ACA, the identity shift that followed, and why she sees boundaries as the antidote to codependence. We talk practicals: how to define standards across health, work, and relationships; how to turn values into guardrails; and how to use simple scripts that don’t try to control others but do honor your limits. Expect straight talk on guilt, shame, and the “selfish” label, plus real‑world examples like ending a charged phone call with care or opting out of politics to protect your nervous system. This is also a conversation about physiology and safety. You’ll learn to read early body cues, build internal safety, and move from reactivity to choice. We unpack rumination and catastrophizing, explain why tolerating uncomfortable feelings is a boundary superpower, and show how healthy limits actually deepen intimacy by revealing your true shape. If you’ve ever said yes when you wanted to say no—or swung from no boundaries to fortress mode—this episode offers a middle path: clear, compassionate, and sustainable. If the ideas resonate, follow the show, share it with a friend who needs boundary bravery today, and leave a quick review to help more listeners find these tools. You can find Barb at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/ Support the show Sign up for the launch team for my book, Nature Knows, and get free insider news and surprises at https://maryrothwell.net/natureknows Comments about this episode? Suggestions for a future episode? Email me directly at NSVpodcast@gmail.com.  Want to be a guest on No Shrinking Violets Podcast for Women? Send Mary Rothwell a message on PodMatch, here: https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/noshrinkingviolets Follow me on Facebook and Instagram, and check out my website!

    51 min
5
out of 5
14 Ratings

About

No Shrinking Violets is all about what it truly means for women to take up their space in the world – mind, body and spirit. Mary Rothwell, licensed therapist and certified integrative mental health practitioner, has seen women “stay small” and fit into the space in life that they have been conditioned to believe they deserve. Drawing on 35 years in the mental health field and from her perspective as a woman who was often told to "stay in your lane," Mary discusses how early experiences, society and sometimes our own limiting beliefs can convince us that living inside guardrails is the best -- or only -- option. She'll explore how to recognize our unique essential nature and how to use that to empower a new narrative.Through topics that span psychology, friendships, nature and even gut-brain health, Mary creates a space that is inspiring and authentic - where she celebrates the intuition and power of women who want to chart their own course and program their own GPS. Mary's topics will include sleep and supplements and nutrition and how to live like a plant. (Yes, you read that right - the example of plants is often the most insightful path to knowing what we truly need to feel fulfilled). She’ll talk about setting boundaries, communicating, and relationships, and explore mental health and wellness: trauma and resilience, how our food impacts our mood and the power of simple daily habits. And so much more! As a gardener, Mary knows that violets have been misjudged for centuries and are actually one of the most resilient and ecologically important plants in her native garden. Like violets, women are often underestimated, and they can even mistake their unique gifts for weaknesses. Join Mary to explore all the ways the vibrant and strong violet is an example for finding fulfillment in our own lives.

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