The Brian Comstock Podcast

Brian Comstock
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The Brian Comstock Podcast. Insight delivered on some basis. Getting yourself back: boundaries, people-pleasing, nervous system recovery, sleep, training, getting over an ex, and the mindset shifts that actually move you. Hosted by Brian Comstock, coach and Certified Integrative Psychology Practitioner. Some weeks it's a guest. Some weeks it's just me working through what I've figured out, and what I'm still figuring out. No guru voice. Just the stuff I'd tell a friend. YouTube: youtube.com/@Brian.Comstock IG: @brian.comstock Work with me: briancomstock.co

  1. 3d ago

    ADHD Motivation, Gaming vs Work, Body Doubling, Self-Talk & Finding Real Friends

    Nik Bakhshalian is back, and he opens with a question every ADHD brain has asked. He can spend eight hours straight building a castle in Valheim, brick by brick. He can't work for eight hours straight. His words: "And what is the difference?" I spent a couple of months chasing that exact question when I built LifeQuest, my habit app modeled on video games: points, levels, a leaderboard, even staking your own money on yourself. I thought the missing piece was accountability. Nik's take: for ADHD it's not accountability, it's urgency. Someone waiting for you, right now. "He's here. He's at my door. He's waiting. I just gotta open the door." We get into remote body doubling (and why it might be the unlock I was looking for), why beating yourself up makes it worse, treating yourself like you'd treat a friend, can't vs won't, when to accept a limitation, recovering people pleasing, why being yourself is the only way to find real friends, and the catch of feeling too spent to do the thing that gives you energy. Also: why I never got a magnet from Italy. CHAPTERS00:00 "What is the difference?"00:15 Being you vs performing02:30 Why can I game 8 hours but not work 8?05:01 LifeQuest: gamifying your habits07:10 Discipline has a shelf life09:03 Was accountability the missing piece?10:31 ADHD: urgency, not accountability13:02 Only going to the gym with a buddy17:18 The planner vs the doer18:46 Why beating yourself up backfires19:30 Treat yourself like a friend20:29 Can't or won't?21:48 The piano genius who won't hit record24:10 Remote body doubling: "It's our hour"25:56 An hour with someone (The Alignment Project idea)30:00 Limitation, or just how you work?31:36 One person is enough33:31 Years of overriding what works for me34:33 Being yourself attracts the right people36:31 Run the experiment, accept the result39:36 "We can't" vs "we can't right now"42:02 Recovering people pleaser45:16 Real friends need the real you50:28 Three kinds of people at work52:35 The Italy magnet (and the best gift)58:20 Too spent to do the thing that gives you energy59:36 Our best episode?1:00:58 Outro Guest: Nik Bakhshalian Host: Brian ComstockTransformation Artist | CoachInstagram: @brian.comstock Watch the full episode on YouTube The Brian Comstock Podcast is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.

  2. Oct 1

    Nik Bakhshalian: Smart and ADHD, Mensa, Masking, Hyperfocus, Doom Scrolling & Finding Your Drive

    Smart enough to know exactly what to do, and still can't make it stick? That's who I built The Alignment Project for. Actually follow through: we meet live every week, you pick one small experiment, and the next week I ask how it went (not a room of 500). The first 21 members lock in $49/mo for good, and you get 30 days to try it or I refund it. Here's the invite. Nik Bakhshalian is back for round three. He just got home from Mensa's annual gathering, and he says a lot of the people he met there are neurodivergent in some way. Nik was diagnosed with ADHD about two years ago, then took two more years to mail his Mensa letter. His words: "it's such an ADHD thing." And the reason nobody caught it sooner: "my intelligence made it so that I didn't have to pay attention in class. I just did well." We get into being smart and ADHD at the same time (Nik explains the "twice exceptional" thing), how a high IQ can mask ADHD for years, the hyperfocus then zero interest cycle, how hard you should push yourself, obsession vs white-knuckling, the halo effect, and why we doom scroll instead of sleeping. CHAPTERS 00:00 Smart enough to hide it 00:11 Nik's back for round three 00:45 Inside Mensa's annual gathering 02:19 Why so many members are neurodivergent 04:35 Diagnosed 2 years ago (and the 2-year letter) 05:19 How a high IQ masks ADHD 08:53 Smart isn't the same as growth-minded 13:14 Mensa's untapped potential 18:00 "Because I can" 22:43 ADHD hyperfocus and the don't over-invest rule 26:49 Social clubs, drive and the old guard 30:59 "We can't" vs the laws of physics 34:54 Starry-eyed reformers vs inertia 37:06 Leading change at work 38:55 Books, looks and the sweatpants years 46:15 The halo effect 49:20 Drive vs contentment (and jet lag) 52:17 How hard should you push yourself? 54:16 Obsession vs white-knuckling 56:59 Certainty, confidence and ADHD 1:02:33 What success means (and why we doom scroll) 1:06:02 Outro Guest: Nik Bakhshalian Host: Brian Comstock Transformation Artist | Coach Instagram: @brian.comstock

  3. Sep 5

    Nico Seedsman — Navy at 17, SAS at 21, Out at 29: Combat PTSD, Ayahuasca, Stem Cells, Finding God, and Building The Order

    Nico Seedsman joined the Australian Navy at seventeen as an electrical engineer. At twenty he switched to the Army for special operations, spent a year and a half in reconnaissance infantry as a team commander, and went into the SAS at twenty-one. He served there until twenty-nine, through multiple combat deployments, and left with full-blown PTSD, autoimmunity and catastrophic injuries, after a period where his own subconscious was steering the car toward a tree on the drive to work. This is the story of how he put his hand up, lost his identity, his tribe and his mission in one moment, and rebuilt from nothing into what the psychologists call post-traumatic growth. Ayahuasca. Stem cells. Meditation. Finding God. And the difference between bravery and courage. Nico now runs The Order, a brotherhood for men who want to become the true gentleman. Watch the full episode on YouTube Find Nico and The Order: The Order · The Order on Instagram Disclosure: I work with Nico on The Order. This episode discusses suicidal ideation, PTSD and combat trauma. If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, contact your local emergency services. In the US, call or text 988 (Suicide and Crisis Lifeline). Outside the US, find a helpline near you. CHAPTERS 00:00 Cold open 00:16 Who is Nico Seedsman 03:23 My subconscious wanted me dead 12:04 How do you not give up when you want to? 15:58 Quitting vs. changing direction 21:34 The relationship that turned him upside down 27:48 Why the military doesn't let you recover 36:57 Grief on both sides 40:25 Ayahuasca and plant medicine 45:59 Stem cells vs. allopathic medicine 48:37 Finding God 56:47 Door one, or game over 1:03:18 Life before and after 1:13:37 Where to start 1:16:37 Why fear feels like death 1:24:03 Five positives for every negative 1:33:18 The Order 1:42:34 Closing thoughts 1:43:25 Outro Host: The Brian Comstock Podcast Transformation Artist | Coach Instagram: @brian.comstock The Brian Comstock Podcast is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.

  4. Aug 21

    Britnie Turner — Living in Her Car, Buying a Private Island, Escaping a Brilliant Liar, Hearing God's Voice, and Becoming a Force for Good

    Britnie Turner went from living in her car to building one of the fastest-growing women-owned companies in the world, owning a private island wellness resort, and founding a humanitarian organization that has rescued thousands of people. This conversation isn't about how she built it. It's about what it cost her - and how she healed. We get into the movie that changed her life at twelve, the little girl who couldn't speak, learning to hear the voice of love, the relationship that nearly ended everything and the phone call that saved her life, the rebound date who became her husband - a 20-year Green Beret - and Healed Heroes, the program born from his recovery that has walked 232 suicidal veterans back without losing one. This episode discusses abuse and suicide. If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, contact your local emergency services. In the US, call or text 988 (Suicide and Crisis Lifeline). Outside the US, find a helpline near you. CHAPTERS 00:00 Introduction 01:24 The movie that changed her life at 12 04:20 The little girl who couldn't speak 05:45 Living in her car, building anyway 09:50 Richard Branson's brand advice 11:16 An island built for healing, not escape 18:58 Learning to hear God's voice 20:30 Wrestling with whether God is good 24:45 Hurt people hurt people, healed people heal people 32:06 The relationship that almost destroyed her 39:20 The phone call that saved her life 40:41 What love actually says 48:00 The rebound date who became her husband 51:58 Healed Heroes: 232 veterans, zero lost 55:33 Write your eulogy 1:01:22 Outro GUEST: BRITNIE TURNER Instagram: @britnieturner Force for Good Collective The Aerial BVI · Instagram: @theaerialbvi Aerial Recovery BRIAN COMSTOCK Host: The Brian Comstock Podcast Transformation Artist | Coach Instagram: @brian.comstock Watch the full episode on YouTube The Brian Comstock Podcast is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.

  5. Aug 14

    The Brutal Truth About Coaches Who've Never Done It

    Nik Bakhshalian is back for round two. We get into why most coaching advice fails - not because the advice is bad, but because whoever's giving it never actually did the thing. The line that stuck with me: as soon as you miss step one, it renders two through ten completely irrelevant. Most coaches have a brilliant answer for steps two through ten. Nobody checks whether they ever did step one. We also get into why incentives quietly run everything, including the time a bounty on cobras created more cobras, why the best networking isn't networking, and gratitude as a genuine unfair advantage. CHAPTERS 00:00 Introduction and guest overview 12:07 The pitfalls of overengineering solutions 39:52 Stories of fairness and understanding in practice 52:07 Final thoughts and closing remarks Guest: Nik Bakhshalian Watch on YouTube: youtube.com/watch?v=KklzUe6o2fg

  6. Jul 31

    The Mensa ADHD Brain — Late Diagnosis, the Power of Certainty, and Systems That Beat Willpower

    Nik Bakhshalian's ADHD assessment included an IQ test. He scored in the 99th percentile — and joined Mensa. The same brain that couldn't finish a work project qualified for the high-IQ society, and that contradiction explains why so many smart people get diagnosed late, or never. Nik and I have been friends for years, and this is the most honest conversation we've had on the record: late diagnosis, what finally brought certainty, why maintenance feels like death to some brains, and the systems that actually work when discipline doesn't. CHAPTERS 00:00 We're back 01:47 Getting tested as an adult 09:56 Why certainty changes everything 19:55 Beating procrastination without willpower 29:48 Connection, and the fireside conversations 39:40 Clarity, variability, and what actually drives motivation 49:52 The Mensa result 59:58 Systems that hold when discipline doesn't 1:09:56 Knowing yourself on purpose Watch on YouTube: https://youtu.be/2whS6QvM9_A The Brian Comstock Podcast — conversations that go deeper than surface level. Hosted by Brian Comstock, coach and Certified Integrative Psychology Practitioner. More at briancomstock.com

  7. Jul 20

    How to Handle Disrespect — Spotting the Subtle Signs, What to Actually Say, and Standing Up Without Losing Your Cool

    Most disrespect doesn't look like an insult. It's the person who's always late, who talks over you, who asks your opinion just to argue. You feel it and say nothing. This episode: how to spot the subtle stuff, shift the mindset that keeps you quiet, slow it down in the moment, and the actual words to use when someone disrespects you. Disrespect isn't an attack. It's a test of what you'll accept. Work with me: https://briancomstock.co

  8. Jul 19

    The Recovering People Pleaser — Why You Can't Stop, Saying No Without Guilt, and Ending Self-Abandonment

    You keep saying you'll set the boundary, say the no, stop over-giving. Then you don't. That's not weak willpower - it's that the loudest voice in your head keeps out-arguing the quiet one that's actually right. In my first solo episode, I walk through a real no I had to say this week: a friend offered me an "opportunity," and my body said no before my mind could talk me out of it. I break down what happened and the three moves I used to say no without the guilt. In this episode: Why you can't stop people pleasing - the loud mind vs. the quiet, wiser whisperThe four scripts every people pleaser runsWhy people pleasing isn't kindness - it's self-abandonment with better brandingUsing a sounding board to hear your own noCourage as reps - building the muscle one hard no at a timeHow to deliver a no in the format that keeps you clearIf you've spent years being "the easy one," this one's for you. Watch on YouTube: youtu.be/x4CEXj7SjHw Instagram: @brian.comstock Work with me: briancomstock.co

    The Recovering People Pleaser — Why You Can't Stop, Saying No Without Guilt, and Ending Self-Abandonment
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About

The Brian Comstock Podcast. Insight delivered on some basis. Getting yourself back: boundaries, people-pleasing, nervous system recovery, sleep, training, getting over an ex, and the mindset shifts that actually move you. Hosted by Brian Comstock, coach and Certified Integrative Psychology Practitioner. Some weeks it's a guest. Some weeks it's just me working through what I've figured out, and what I'm still figuring out. No guru voice. Just the stuff I'd tell a friend. YouTube: youtube.com/@Brian.Comstock IG: @brian.comstock Work with me: briancomstock.co

Information

  • Creator
    Brian Comstock
  • Years Active
    2025 - 2026
  • Episodes
    14
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © Brian Comstock
  • Show Website
    The Brian Comstock Podcast