Her Seat At The Table

Sara Abernethy

A podcast that spotlights the women reshaping the hospitality industry, breaking barriers, and carving their paths in the ever-evolving world of restaurants, food, and community.

  1. Sep 22

    Don't Have A Conniption: Melissa Katrincic of Durham Distillery

    This conversation follows Melissa Katrincic, co-founder and CEO of Durham Distillery, through a year of major transition, from trademark chaos and misleading headlines to a sharper focus on community, authenticity, and profitability. It’s part business strategy, part founder therapy, and part candid look at what it takes to keep leading when the industry, the economy, and the rules keep shifting.We discuss how Durham Distillery is rebuilding around the Triangle, why the Juniper Room is becoming a true third space, and what Melissa has learned about PR, ownership, and staying visible without becoming reactive.  According to Melissa, the theme of her next era is "RECLAMATION", and I can't wait to see how that unfolds for her. ‼️JOIN OUR PATREON COMMUNITY 🥰 to support this work and keep these conversations going for the women who need them.  ‼️ Key topics Melissa explains how Durham Distillery moved from a high-growth, investor-backed strategy to a more grounded, local-first approach focused on sustainability and profit.We discuss the trademark and brand confusion around Durham Distillery in the US, UK, and Canada, including how a misleading news headline created a public relations scramble.Melissa shares how she handled the Google Alerts crisis, Reddit conversations, and the importance of responding quickly when your business identity is at stake.The conversation explores what it means to be a founder who is visible online, and why Melissa insists that any public response truly sound like her voice.We discuss the shift from chasing broad expansion to rebuilding around the Triangle community and making Durham Distillery feel known again locally.Melissa shares the thinking behind the Juniper Room, a small upstairs event space designed as a community-focused third space for intimate events.Product innovation still matters, from the relaunch of the Damn Fine liqueurs to the Mocha Bourbon Cream, which became the company’s lead SKU.We discuss the reality of running a business through layoffs, investment changes, and legal unwinding, and why profitability is now the goal.Melissa reflects on entrepreneurship, motherhood, and how her definition of success changed across different chapters of life.The conversation closes with a reminder that the best founders are not always the loudest, but the ones who stay clear about what they stand for.Timestamps 00:00 – Opening the mics and setting up the conversation 00:57 – Why niche community events matter more than “just another event” 02:01 – The female founder Oktoberfest idea and flipping tradition on its head 03:29 – Discovering an espresso martini made with gin 04:28 – Why product builds have to change for vodka vs. gin 05:20 – Small businesses as canaries in the economic coal mine 06:16 – Recession signals from casual dining and value deals 08:08 – Trademark timing, coexistence, and Durham Distillery UK 11:58 – The headline that said Durham Distillery had shut down 13:11 – How the team responded through media outreach and Reddit 14:34 – Reframing the brand for a more local, realistic future 16:12 – A painful lesson from a past event cancellation and online fallout 17:16 – Why authenticity matters in public messaging 18:48 – Why Melissa has less empathy for competitors who created the mess 20:10 – Meeting years ago and the founder-to-founder advice exchange 22:05 – Building a business while planning for family life 24:34 – Why the business has to fit life, not consume it 25:30 – How Durham Distillery started as a passion project, not an exit plan 27:37 – The path from W-2 work to entrepreneurship 28:38 – A corporate layoff window that made the leap possible 30:54 – Support from a strong woman leader and early investors 31:48 – Being present for kids in the early years of the business 33:06 – The 2019 investor raise and the later strategy reset 33:26 – Reclamation as the word for 2025, rebirth for 2026 34:49 – Legal unwinding and the end of a relationship outside their control 37:10 – Why hospitality is harder now than during COVID 38:20 – Returning to community, not just sales 40:15 – Relaunching Damn Fine liqueurs and why real ingredients matter 41:04 – The accidental birth of Mocha Bourbon Cream 44:14 – Turning the upstairs tasting room into the Juniper Room 45:11 – Vision boarding, Galentine’s, and small-scale community events 47:10 – Letting the team own decisions instead of having Melissa be the hub 47:47 – The goal of returning to profitability this year 49:37 – Feeling more grounded and hopeful than before 50:06 – What to check out in the Triangle and at RDU 51:08 – Where to order Conniption outside North Carolina

    Don't Have A Conniption: Melissa Katrincic of Durham Distillery
  2. Sep 7

    Simone Saleh Lawson and Noelle Saleh on Family Business, Motherhood, and Building FigMINT Farms

    Sara Abernethy sits down with Noelle and Simone, the sisters behind Sassool, for a conversation about growing up in their family restaurant, navigating leadership with their father, and building new experiences through FigMINT Farms. They also get candid about motherhood, maternity leave, and how family, work, and ambition all collide in real life.We discuss how the sisters divide responsibilities, how they expanded from one location to two, and why their newest creative outlet is a series of immersive dinners in the pines. 🥰 JOIN OUR PATREON COMMUNITY🥰: https://bit.ly/4fL5Ra9 Key topics In this episode, Sara Abernethy talks with Noelle and Simone about what it means to run a family business together while maintaining sibling roles, respect, and clear boundaries.They share how they grew up in Raleigh, went through Catholic school, and spent childhood weekends working in the family store packing spices, bread, and pita by hand.The sisters explain why Sassool became a natural fit after college, combining entrepreneurship, hospitality, Lebanese culture, and their father’s influence as a businessman.They break down the hard part of family ownership: communication, feedback, and learning how to separate “dad” from “boss” while still honoring his vision.Noelle and Simone describe how they divided the business by strengths, with one focused on operations and managers, and the other handling social media, public-facing work, and events.They talk about opening the Cary location in 2015, the long search for the right second site, and the non-negotiables they used when choosing a location, including being near neighborhoods and anchor retailers like Whole Foods or Trader Joe’s.The conversation turns to motherhood, including maternity leave, returning to work gradually, daycare decisions, and the emotional whiplash of wanting to be fully present at home while still feeling the need to contribute at work.They explain how FigMINT Farms began as a personal project and later evolved into an event venue, garden space, and creative extension of the Sassool brand.The sisters walk through Dinner in the Pines, a curated three-hour experience with cocktail hour, family-style dining, shared tables, sunset timing, and a focus on connection and memory-making.They share how the event series is evolving with new elements like live music and a fire dancer, and how it has become a launchpad for catering, private rentals, and future ideas like glamping-style A-frames in the pines. CONNECT WITH SIMONE & NOELLE: SassoolDinner In The Pines SeriesInstagram: @sassoolcafe & @raleighfoodienews

    Simone Saleh Lawson and Noelle Saleh on Family Business, Motherhood, and Building FigMINT Farms
  3. Aug 24

    Adé Carrena on the Beauty of Delusion, Lineage, and Storytelling in Cooking and Business

    Award-winning chef, culinary story teller, and documentary film maker Adé Carrena shares the personal and political layers behind her food, her documentary work, and the mission driving iLeWA Foods and Dounou Supper Club.  In this episode, Adé opens up about her experience as an older adopted child and her experience both from her native country of Benin and assimilating to western culture at age 10 - and how it shaped  her approach to cooking, storytelling, and entrepreneurship. The conversation centers on one big idea: success is not just about scale, it is about staying rooted in your values.  We also talk about motherhood, adoption, identity, and what scaling ethically looks like to her. ‼️JOIN OUR PATREON COMMUNITY 🥰 to support this work and keep these conversations going for the women who need them.  ‼️ Key topics In this episode: Adé describes herself as “delusional” in the best way, meaning she believes ideas can become reality if she keeps figuring out the path from thought to action.In this episode: both Sara and Adé talk about the tension of being a maker and a promoter at the same time, especially when you are the whole company.In this episode: motherhood changed Adé’s relationship to perfection. She says having her daughter taught her to be imperfect, and that shows up in her food, her plating, and how she leads her team.In this episode: the two reflect on how convenience culture has made cooking more solitary, while food at its core has always been communal and relational.In this episode: Adé explains how restaurants teach crisis management, composure under pressure, adaptability, and other skills that transfer far beyond hospitality.In this episode: she shares the story of her first pop-up, a $35 ticketed dinner that made no money but proved to her that she had found her path.In this episode: Adé talks about leaving banking to pursue food, and how COVID pushed her to rethink what success and stability really meant.In this episode: she explains why she calls herself a cook and storyteller first, honoring the women in her lineage who passed down food knowledge long before formal culinary language existed.In this episode: Adé goes deep on the ritual she performs in the kitchen, inviting her ancestors into the work and treating cooking as a spiritual practice.In this episode: the conversation turns to adoption, including Adé’s view that adopted children need emotional support, cultural care, and recognition of their agency.In this episode: Adé shares how meeting filmmaker Brad led to Bite of Benin, a 36-minute documentary that intentionally avoids exploiting trauma and instead centers beauty, history, and complexity.In this episode: she breaks down the mission of Ilewa Foods, which sources from women in Benin and is built to create jobs without compromising the people at the heart of the work.In this episode: Adé explains why she is not opening a traditional restaurant right now, even after major recognition, because the lifestyle, burden, and values do not currently align.In this episode: she highlights the importance of women mentors in hospitality, including Chef Ashley Christensen and Chef Georgiana Vieux, and how they shaped her thinking about leadership and abundance.In this episode: the conversation closes on grace, identity, and the idea that people can be wrong about you, and that sometimes your job is simply to keep moving forward.Timestamps 00:00 - The challenge of being the maker and the messenger 00:56 - “Delusional” in the best way 02:52 - Motherhood teaching imperfection 07:00 - Convenience culture and isolation 08:16 - Community, conflict, and discomfort 10:30 - Open-door hospitality in Benin 11:28 - Adé’s background: Benin, French, Connecticut 13:22 - Why restaurant work felt like art 15:14 - Restaurant skills that transfer everywhere 16:54 - COVID, calm under pressure, and survival mode 20:38 - You cannot be the best at everything at once 21:54 - The first pop-up that changed everything 24:29 - Leaving banking and choosing the path 28:06 - Why Adé calls herself a cook, not a chef 30:27 - Ritual in the kitchen and ancestral guidance 32:54 - How Bite of Benin began 36:05 - Protecting stories from exploitation 39:48 - Adoption, agency, and the child’s perspective 43:19 - Making the film with intention and beauty 45:33 - Why the documentary humanized her mother 47:15 - The film’s impact on schools and young people 51:39 - Reconnecting with her mom and finding Ilewa Foods 54:20 - Economic power for women in Benin 56:01 - Scaling without abandoning the source 59:29 - The audacious dream for Ilewa Foods 62:07 - What Beninese food tastes like 66:38 - Letting go, delegation, and growth 70:12 - Why she is not opening a restaurant right now 73:10 - Building work opportunities, not just a dining room 74:12 - Why the supper club works 77:24 - Different business models, different tradeoffs 81:09 - Grace, humanity, and the reset after success 84:32 - How Adé met Chef Ashley Christensen 89:57 - Meeting Chef Georgiana Vieux through MAP 91:17 - France, shared timelines, and future documentaries 94:22 - The historical weight of the Bight of Benin 96:10 - Healing, bridge-building, and shared humanity 97:07 - Where to find Adé and her work Notable moments: “I think I can do anything. And my motto is if I can imagine it, then it’s possible.” “The most powerful thing you can do is let other people be wrong about you CONNECT WITH ADÉ: iLeWA Foods - Adé's spice companyUpcoming Dounou Supper Club EventsConnect on Instagram: @adecarrenaAction items If you are building a food business, think carefully about whether scale is aligned with your values.If you work in hospitality, pay attention to the transferable skills you are already developing under pressure.If you are telling personal or cultural stories, consider what should be shown, what should be left out, and who deserves the right to hear the full version.If you are navigating identity, family history, or adoption, remember that agency and context matter just as much as intention.If you are an entrepreneur, ask whether your current model gives you autonomy, sustainability, and room to stay human.

    Adé Carrena on the Beauty of Delusion, Lineage, and Storytelling in Cooking and Business
  4. Aug 10

    Deirdre Auld: The Path from Service to CEO

    Deirdre Auld, CEO of the Coda Group and leadership coach, shares her journey of professional evolution, the importance of reflective practice, and balancing growth with authenticity. Perfect for hospitality leaders and entrepreneurs looking to level up personally and professionally. ‼️JOIN OUR PATREON COMMUNITY 🥰 to support this work and keep these conversations going for the women who need them.  ‼️ Key Topics Deirdre's path from service to CEO and the lessons learned along the wayThe importance of self-reflection and organizational learning for leadership effectivenessStrategies for creating space for team development amidst industry chaosHow personal education, including grad school, boosted her leadership skillsThe impact of industry pandemic experiences on resilience and vision settingPractical tips for implementing regular reflection and post-mortems in hospitalityThe significance of confidence, vulnerability, and self-awareness in leadershipBalancing industry demands with play, passion, and hobbies like embroidery and color theoryRecognizing and honoring privilege while emphasizing hard work and perseveranceThe power of setting boundaries and prioritizing personal unicorn spaceTimestamps 00:35 – Introduction to Deirdre Auld and her hospitality journey 1:03 – Deirdre’s background and collaborations with culinary legends 2:12 – Podcast recording style and organic conversations with Amy Poehler’s approach 3:44 – Deirdre’s insights on leadership and confidence in industry roles 4:34 – Long-term friendships and nostalgic reflections in hospitality history 6:35 – Evolution of Deirdre’s entrepreneurial ventures with Tableside and coaching 8:00 – Pivoting the business model for leadership development in restaurants 9:34 – Returning to leading Coda Group as CEO and reflecting on growth 10:28 – How leadership roles influence self-perception and confidence 13:53 – Deirdre’s early management experiences and leadership challenges 15:14 – Insights from her graduate studies on individual and organizational change 17:07 – Reflection practices improving team and personal performance 18:04 – Moving from reactive to strategic responses as a leader 20:12 – The value of post-mortem reviews and learning from big moments 22:05 – Prioritizing reflection despite industry busyness 23:36 – Coaching strategies for fostering self-reflection in teams 25:07 – Developmental meetings and leadership growth at SRV 28:18 – How to ascend through hospitality leadership levels effectively 31:37 – The importance of continuous learning and self-investment 34:52 – Resilience through industry crises and COVID-19 impacts 36:56 – The significance of higher education and access to learning opportunities 38:23 – Transitioning from service manager to GM and the associated responsibilities 42:36 – Avoiding martyr complex and leading sustainably 44:49 – Industry urgency and building long-term resilient businesses 46:01 – Overcoming people-pleasing tendencies for authentic leadership 48:23 – Moving from day-to-day ops to visionary leadership and strategic focus 50:42 – Giving team members agency and fostering curiosity 55:47 – Coaching questions to empower problem-solving in teams 58:46 – Balancing visibility and humility as a leader 62:49 – Personal hobbies for joy and self-care, from embroidery to color theory 66:40 – The importance of recognizing the context-dependent nature of colors 69:17 – Cultivating curiosity about life’s nuances and the role of perspective 71:39 – Final thoughts on authentic leadership and continuous growth Resources & Links "She Did Not Smile Enough" - Deirdre's most recent substack outlining a personal experience in her career, and how women more often than not bear the brunt of emotional labor.Tableside Coaching PracticeDeirdre Auld on LinkedInCoda GroupAmy Poehler's BiographyHarvard Business Review on ReflectionConnect with Deirdre Instagram

    Deirdre Auld: The Path from Service to CEO
  5. Jul 28

    Dana Cowin on Progressive Hedonist & Community-Driven Food Initiatives

    Dana Cowin is an award-winning editor, author and convener who propels change through food and joy. Founder of Progressive Hedonist, Cowin has launched a national event series to build resilience, support local food, reduce food waste and deepen commitments to healing the planet through joyful gatherings. Since 2024, she's hosted dozens of events in 15 states, as well as produced a podcast that was a finalist for a James Beard Foundation award. This movement builds on Cowin’s experience creating Speaking Broadly, which featured events, a zine and podcast spotlighting visionary women at the intersection of creativity, sustainability and food. Cowin was Editor in Chief of Food & Wine Magazine for more than 20 years, leading all editorial aspects of the brand including print, digital and books. She has written extensively on food and culture, including a cookbook, "Mastering My Mistakes in the Kitchen: Learning to Cook with 65 Great Chefs and 100 Recipes." Cowin has been a judge on Top Chef and Beat Bobby Flay as well as a speaker at SXSW, the Welcome Conference, TEDx Manhattan, and many other events. She's on the Board of Food Education Fund and the Food Council of City Harvest. In this episode, Dana shares her journey from magazine editor to founder of Progressive Hedonist, emphasizing how small, intentional changes can foster joy, environmental stewardship, and deep human connections.  We explore the evolving relationship with food, sustainability, and the three principles of the Progressive Hedonist Movement:1) Source sustainably2) Reduce Copiously3) Live Abundantly 🥰JOIN OUR PATREON COMMUNITY 🥰 to support this work and keep these conversations going for the women who need them.  ‼️ Main Topics Covered:   The origin and evolution of the concept of progressive hedonism and its core principlesPractical ways to reduce food waste and source sustainably while balancing local and global considerationsThe importance of community, shared experiences, and crafts in building a resilient and joyful lifeHow incremental habits at home can impact climate change and promote mindful consumptionDana’s innovative ideas for community-driven food initiatives, like neighborhood pizza parties and collective cookingThe role of joy as resistance in environmental activism and personal well-being  Timestamps: 00:00 - Introduction to Dana Cowin and the concept of progressive hedonism 02:15 - Dana’s background in publishing and her journey to environmental activism 08:17 - The intersection of food, joy, and climate change 14:31 - Principles of progressive hedonism: source responsibly, reduce copiously, live abundantly 16:52 - The staggering impact of food waste and strategies to mitigate it 23:24 - Rethinking household shopping and family cooking practices 41:37 - The story behind Dana’s Pi Day pizza event and community cooking projects 47:19 - The innovative use of banana peels and food scraps in no-waste cooking 50:02 - The meaning of living abundantly through relationships and community 55:00 - The importance of simple joys, trash TV, and hobbies for mental health 58:11 - How joy fuels activism and personal resilience Resources & Links:   Progressive Hedonist - Dana Cowin’s platform and ethos Emma’s Torch - Culinary training for refugees and marginalized communitiesNature’s Path - Organic Farming - Example of sustainable sourcing  Connect with Dana Cowin:   Instagram: progressive_hedonistWebsite: danacowin.com  Join the conversation about transforming everyday habits into impactful, joyful actions—because how we live truly makes a difference.

    Dana Cowin on Progressive Hedonist & Community-Driven Food Initiatives
  6. Jun 29

    Anna Edwards: A Day In The Life of an Award-Winning Sommelier

    Sara hangs out with Anna Edwards, sommelier of the iconic, Michelin-starred Poole's Diner in Raleigh, NC.  In this conversation, they discuss imposter syndrome in wine, what it's like running an award-winning wine program, and looking toward the next chapter of their careers. Main topics include: The evolution of Poole’s Diner in Raleigh with its Michelin recognition and approachable fine diningAnna’s journey from corporate roots, to joining the team at Death & Taxes, to leading wine at Poole’s DinerHer unique approach to building an inclusive, playful wine program aligned with regional cuisineStrategies for expanding wine lists thoughtfully and engaging local producersThe balance between global exploration and local sourcing in wine selectionInsights into wine education: certifications, continuous learning, and demystifying wine for staff Overcoming imposter syndrome and embracing the joy of learning and sharing wine The importance of self-care, rest, and fostering authenticity in a demanding industry Goals for 2026: lifelong dreaming of study abroad, deepening wine knowledge, and building community 🥰JOIN OUR PATREON COMMUNITY 🥰 to support this work and keep these conversations going for the women who need them.  ‼️ Timestamps:00:35 - Funny pet stories and family life 02:19 - Siblings, tattoos, and family traditions 04:04 - Navigating siblings' relationships across ages 07:38 - The story behind Poole’s reputation and Michelin recognition 08:49 - Approachability in fine dining and wine service 09:58 - Building a curated, playful wine list aligned with regional cuisine 11:24 - Greatest hits and local wine considerations 12:54 - Strategies for educating staff on wine basics and geography 14:20 - Collaboration and mutual admiration in the wine world 15:00 - Overcoming imposter syndrome in wine certifications 16:29 - The importance of continual learning and seeking mentorship 17:45 - Balancing technical expertise with creative expression in wine and life 19:21 - Personal background in opera and language skills 21:04 - Connecting musical passions with the hospitality industry 22:48 - Developing wine classes and community engagement 24:29 - Supporting staff through education and sneaky lessons 26:04 - Managing inventory, pricing, and profitability in wine programs 28:12 - The power of language skills in wine and opera 30:33 - Long-term dreams: studying abroad and study plans 33:15 - Breaking industry barriers around education and certification 36:38 - The road to expanding by building a strong team and curriculum 38:24 - Managing data and financial metrics in wine programs 40:49 - The art of pricing and accessibility in wine sales 43:50 - Engagement through guest interaction and wine recommendations 44:55 - Potential of wine clubs and event series for community building 48:19 - Creative ideas versus execution and the importance of timing 50:25 - Nurturing big ideas with the right team and patience 52:17 - Planning the year ahead and setting goals 54:12 - Dreaming of study opportunities in Paris and beyond 56:38 - Prioritizing ongoing learning and industry involvement 58:23 - Balancing personal growth, financial literacy, and community impact 60:03 - Advice for women entering the industry: ask questions and self-care 61:12 - Pride in the hospitality profession and creating memorable moments 62:37 - The importance of rest and personal joy amidst industry stresses 64:16 - Artistic pursuits outside of wine and hospitality 66:16 - Favorite wine questions, personal social media, and future ambitions Resources & Links: Poole's DinerWSET CertificationsVitis House RaleighFrench Wine Scholar Program - Wine Scholar GuildSupport the Podcast: Patreon - Her Seat at the Table  Connect with Anna: Instagram    This conversation exemplifies passion, curiosity, and resilience—valuable for anyone navigating the vibrant and challenging worlds of wine and hospitality. Cheers to growth and connection!

    Anna Edwards: A Day In The Life of an Award-Winning Sommelier
  7. Jun 15

    Anh Luu on Chef-ing On Your Own Terms

    You know her from Queer Eye in New Orleans, you know her from Chopped, OR you know her for her social media sensation, "The Pho-rrito" - meet Anh Luu! In this episode, Anh shares her story of navigating the restaurant industry, resilience after personal loss, and embracing a flexible, self-directed culinary career. We explore her experiences with restaurant ownership, the industry’s challenges, and how she crafted a life of creative independence through catering, pop-ups, and community-driven projects. 🥰JOIN OUR PATREON COMMUNITY 🥰 to support this work and keep these conversations going for the women who need them.  ‼️ Main topics include:   Anh’s journey from a young chef in New Orleans to restaurant owner in Portland, now back to a successful free-lance chef in New OrleansThe emotional and financial struggles of restaurant ownership, especially post-KatrinaThe impact of industry burnout and the decision to step away from day-to-day operationsBuilding a community of support and relying on relationships in New Orleans’ tight-knit food sceneTransitioning to a flexible culinary career focused on private events, consulting, and product creationOvercoming fears of financial instability and shifting from scarcity to abundance mindsetResources & Links: Queer Eye on NetflixWye Hill Kitchen and BrewingGlass House Kitchen  Connect with Anh Luu InstagramLinkedIn  Support the Podcast: Patreon - Her Seat at the Table

    Anh Luu on Chef-ing On Your Own Terms
5
out of 5
8 Ratings

About

A podcast that spotlights the women reshaping the hospitality industry, breaking barriers, and carving their paths in the ever-evolving world of restaurants, food, and community.