Filthee Dispatch - The Glitch Broadcast

Filthee Dispatch -The Glitch Broadcast
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Broadcasting straight from the reptilian cortex of the American experiment. Filthee Frequencies delivers synthetic news, impossible interviews, and low-resolution prophecies—narrated by an AI with boundary issues and a caffeine addiction. Each episode peels back the layers of power, panic, and pixelated patriotism—until something twitches. New drops weekly. Powered by satire, surveillance, and industrial-strength sarcasm. filtheenews.substack.com

Episodes

  1. 06/06/2025

    Press Briefing in a Mirror Maze

    A distorted recording. A voice behind closed doors. Karoline Leavitt speaks candidly—about Trump, Musk, and the psychological fallout of serving as spokesperson in a reality-bending administration. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit filtheenews.substack.com/subscribe

  2. 06/04/2025

    I Built Me First – Interview with the Egos of Trump and Musk

    What happens when the flesh fails but the ego survives? Filthee Radio gains exclusive access to the neuro-chambers housing the autonomous egos of Donald Trump and Elon Musk.They argue over reality, compare empires, and try to license oxygen.Featuring:– AI theology– a live ego duel– unsolicited quotes from Zuckerberg, Kanye, and a grieving neuroscientist.With a bonus: Egonal Cortex FAQ and FEMA-approved weather denial spray. 🔊 Listen before truth gets rebranded. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit filtheenews.substack.com/subscribe

  3. 06/02/2025

    We All Are Going to Die (And Other Things Empathy Told Me in a Walmart Parking Lot)

    When Senator Joni Ernst told an Iowa town hall “we’re all going to die” in response to concerns about cutting Medicaid, something strange happened.Empathy left the building.And we found her. In this special podcast episode, we sit down with the abandoned emotional conscience of the senator, now hiding out in a trench coat, listening to old CSPAN clips and muttering about dental care and divinity. She talks about: * what it felt like inside Ernst during the town hall * how the Tooth Fairy became a policy metaphor * the loneliness of being the last feeling left in a cost-cutting administration * and why even Jesus probably would’ve needed prior authorization If you’ve ever wondered what happens to empathy in American politics, this is your episode. Amen. And logout. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit filtheenews.substack.com/subscribe

  4. 06/01/2025

    The Ritual of Doing Nothing (But Worse)

    Welcome to Soft Apocalypse Sunday, your weekly meditation on curated collapse and ambient despair. In this episode, we explore what it means to rest when rest itself has been monetized, aestheticized, and made vaguely shameful. From scented surveillance candles to passive-aggressive journaling, from algorithm-approved stillness to mindfulness that just wants you to spend money—we ask: Are you actually recharging,or just optimizing your burnout? Because if your skincare feels like a moral act and your silence needs a caption…you’re not alone.You’re just... branding your exhaustion. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit filtheenews.substack.com/subscribe

  5. 05/31/2025

    Commander-in-Stem: The Brain Behind Trump

    This week, Filthee Radio goes deep—subcortical deep.We sat down with the one neural cluster still operational inside Donald J. Trump: his brainstem. From executive reflexes to spontaneous anthem salivation, the Commander-in-Stem explains how America is now run by raw instinct, Fox News, and persistent dampness. Recorded inside a cryogenic golf simulator at Mar-a-Lago.No cortex. No filters. Just the pulse behind the policy. 🎧 Listen now before the amygdala redacts it. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit filtheenews.substack.com/subscribe

  6. 05/30/2025

    FILTHEE 120 SECONDS - May 30, 2025

    This week on Filthee 120 Seconds, we dive headfirst into the shallow end of American cognition: 🧠 Trump’s brainstem grants an exclusive interview, claiming control since 2015.🐔 A single chicken sends the stock market into cardiac arrest.💨 Alex Jones releases Brain Barrier™, the first aerosol designed to block empathy and facts.🔬 Meta buys a molecule that stops doomscrolling and rebrands it as Adhesium™. Meanwhile, somewhere in the Pentagon, someone is live-streaming their dreams directly to the Department of Defense.And you? You’re probably a metaphor in someone else's fever nap. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit filtheenews.substack.com/subscribe

  7. 05/29/2025

    The Chicken Index. Where economics meets instinct, and the feathers always fly.

    This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit filtheenews.substack.com/subscribe

  8. 05/27/2025

    “Hospitality Care” Plan Unveiled: U.S. Hospitals Join Airbnb Amid Bed Shortage Crisis

    Welcome back to Filthee News Radio...where the truth got outsourced to the gig economy. In today’s episode:“Hospitality Care” – because who needs universal healthcare... when you have Airbnb and vibes? It’s official.Starting this summer, if you want surgery in the U.S.,you’ll need to scroll past bachelorette party listings...just to find a vacant ICU bed with good Wi-Fi. Yes.The American healthcare system is now bookable. Prices start at three hundred seventy-nine dollars a night.Not including... the cleaning fee... emotional baggage handling...and a seventy-nine dollar surcharge...for crying too loud during your CAT scan. Need a doctor?There’s an optional virtual assistant available between two and four A.M...assuming they’re not double-booked for a hernia... and a bachelor party. Don’t worry if you’re uninsured.You can always earn a partial refund...by leaving a thoughtful review of your pain. Sample listing?“Minimalist Trauma Suite, downtown-adjacent. Shared nurse.Decor: aspirational.”Four stars.Quote... “Would code blue again.” The White House called the initiative...“a bold step into decentralized triage.”President Trump congratulated Airbnb, adding:“People love Airbnbs.They’ll love this one even more...because the minibar is full of morphine.” And if you’re wondering what happened to Medicare...Well...it now comes with blackout dates, peak season pricing...and a shared towel policy. That’s all from Filthee News Radio. Remember:In twenty twenty-five... you don’t go to the hospital.You check in.And don’t forget to rate your hemorrhage... five stars. Stay Filthee.Stay subscribed. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit filtheenews.substack.com/subscribe

  • 8 Episodes

About

Broadcasting straight from the reptilian cortex of the American experiment. Filthee Frequencies delivers synthetic news, impossible interviews, and low-resolution prophecies—narrated by an AI with boundary issues and a caffeine addiction. Each episode peels back the layers of power, panic, and pixelated patriotism—until something twitches. New drops weekly. Powered by satire, surveillance, and industrial-strength sarcasm. filtheenews.substack.com

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