it’s expected for women to have, but men benefit the most from it. in this episode, i sit down with dr. catherine hakim, a true pioneer in the field of erotic capital. catherine, a distinguished british social scientist and author, has spent decades researching the forces that shape women’s lives, especially when it comes to the complex interplay of beauty, power, and attraction. we discuss her groundbreaking theory of erotic capital, which highlights how physical and social attractiveness can be a powerful, often underestimated, currency that shapes everything from career success to interpersonal dynamics. catherine’s insights are sharp, timely, and completely eye-opening. her work pushes us to question not just how we navigate beauty, but how we think about who gets to benefit from it. we also dive deep into the shifting dynamics between the sexes, from the increasing popularity of plastic surgery among men to the rise of a so-called “male sex deficit” in today’s world. if you're intrigued, be sure to read my essay on erotic capital, titled who’s afraid of beautiful women? over on my substack, where i unpack this idea even further. it’s a conversation that’s only getting started. episode breakdown: 12:16 to 15:29 men take advantage of their erotic capital more than women do16:55 to 18:32 nasty attitudes among women vis-à-vis other women18:33 to 19:32 ugly women hating on attractive women19:33 to 20:28 my experience with women reacting to my erotic capital20:31 to 21:58 the increase in plastic surgery among men and the possible regret of plastic surgery among women21:59 to 22:59 is intrinsic beauty the only beauty worth having?23:00 to 24:36 differences in plastic surgery among countries24:56 to 29:55 male sex deficit and the difference in sexuality between the sexes29:55 to 31:16 the reason for the male sex deficit, the rise in recreational sex, and the perceived right to have sex31:16 to 32:06 heterosexual intercourse is not often female-centered32:06 to 32:41 the lack of intercourse among generation z32:59 to 34:38 adultery as the answer to the male sex deficit (southern european culture as an example)34:39 to 36:16 the incel movement, the male sex deficit, and the perceived right to have sex36:18 to 39:56 the consequences of the differences in educational and professional attainment between men and women39:56 to 40:39 my theory on the dynamic that make heterosexual relationships function best40:41 to 42:24 the reality of women being both head of household and homemakers and the separation of economic capital and erotic capital in relationships42:25 to 43:12 the evolution of gendered roles in relationships43:13 to 46:30 the increasing importance of erotic capital in the 21st century46:31 to 47:23 the importance of humanity and helping people see the world as a sociologist47:24 to 47:27 “we should all be victors in our lives, not victims.”47:28 to 47:37 thanking dr. catherine hakim for her time dr. catherine hakim’s bio: “dr. catherine hakim is a pioneering british social scientist and author. currently, she is professorial research fellow at civitas, the london think tank. from 1993 to 2012, she was senior research fellow at the london school of economics, then at the centre for policy research in london and the wzb social science research institute in berlin. she has published extensively, with over 100 papers published in british, european and american refereed academic journals and edited collections, four textbooks, and over a dozen books and monographs on the labour market, changing patterns of work, women’s employment, social attitudes, social and family policy, research design, and cross-national comparative research in all these areas. while at the london school of economics, she developed preference theory and, more recently, a theory on the social and economic value of erotic capital (physical and social attractiveness) for men and women of all ages. she often contributes to tv and radio programmes, including sky news, bbc daily politics and woman’s hour. she is currently writing a book on sexual politics.” Get full access to Diary of a Diouana Woman at www.diouanawoman.com/subscribe
