Refrigerator Moms

Kelley Jensen, Julianna Scott
  • 4.5 (10)
  • Parenting
  • Updated Weekly

Born from 20 years of friendship, during which they navigated the trenches of autism parenting and advocacy, the Refrigerator Moms is Kelley Jensen and Julianna Scott’s way of reaching out to parents waging the same battles they were.  Their purpose with this podcast is to clear the fog, silence the noise, and find a path through neurodivergence for parents that are stuck between bad choices. They tackle parenting topics such as mom guilt, tantrums, pathological demand avoidance, siblings, medication, comorbidities, social media, and much more. 

  1. 18h ago

    Inside the Making of "An Open Door" with John Festervand

    This episode of Refridgerator Moms goes behind the scenes of An Open Door: Temple Grandin, the documentary that picked up where the HBO film left off. John Festervand, executive producer of the film and longtime colleague of Dr. Temple Grandin at Colorado State University, joins Julianna Scott and Kelley Jensen to talk about how the project came together, what it took to tell the rest of Temple's story, and what he has learned about autism parenting and the autism community from years working alongside her.  He shares how he met the film's director a year before he met Temple, how ten students helped build the film from the ground up, and what Temple herself asked to see included. The conversation also touches on her work with the Temple Grandin Equine Center, her devotion to her students, and the side conversations that reveal what has actually helped her over a lifetime. Key takeaways: John Festervand explains how a chance meeting at the Temple Grandin Equine Center groundbreaking led to a documentaryThe film took nine months and ten student crew members to produceTemple Grandin personally asked that her drawings and collaborators be included in the filmHer legacy goal is simple: keep her website and books available after she is goneSide conversations after events reveal what has genuinely helped her, including diet and past medicationsTemple Grandin's work with equine therapy research and organizations teaching autistic adults trades reflects her hands on approach to autism parenting and advocacyThe documentary aims to show the full arc of her career, not just the part the HBO movie coveredHer students and the ag community describe her as deeply generous with her time and attention Resources Mentioned in This Episode An Open Door: Temple Grandin — the documentary discussed throughout the episode, covering Temple Grandin's life, career and impact beyond the 2010 HBO film.https://templegrandindocumentary.com  Temple Grandin (2010 HBO movie) — the earlier biographical film starring Claire Danes the guest references as the inspiration for telling "the rest of the story." The Temple Grandin Equine Center — the Colorado State University program in Fort Collins named in her honor, researching equine therapy. https://agsci.colostate.edu/tgec/ Surfers Healing — an organization mentioned as the group the film's director, John Barnhart, was working with prior to the documentary, taking autistic kids surfing around the country. https://www.surfershealing.org/ The Creative Act (Rick Rubin) — referenced as the book the guest and the director listened to while editing the film down to its final length. https://sites.prh.com/thecreativeact TACT (Teaching Autistic Community Trades) — an organization mentioned as providing trade certifications and job placement for autistic adults, led by Danny Combs. https://www.buildwithtact.org/ 🔗 Learn More:Website: refrigeratormoms.comInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/refrigeratormoms/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/refrigeratormomsFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/refrigeratormoms/TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@RefrigeratorMoms Refrigerator Moms is sponsored by Brain Performance Technologies, a specialty mental health clinic that offers neuromodulation treatments for mental health conditions including depression, PTSD, OCD, anxiety, ADHD and autism. Our treatments utilize TMS (transcranial magnetic stimulation) protocols including rTMS, aTMS, and MeRT. All of our treatments are drug-free and noninvasive. Call for insurance options or learn more at https://brainperformancetechnologies.com 00:00 Intro to John Festervand and the documentary01:18 How he met Temple Grandin at Colorado State03:23 Deciding to tell the rest of her story06:06 His philanthropy role and building the film team09:47 Pitching the documentary idea to Temple11:25 Biggest lessons learned making the film13:12 Her legacy and giving back to students19:00 Her impact on the agricultural community20:10 What got left on the cutting room floor22:19 Temple's notes and directives for the film26:16 Side conversations about medication and diet29:13 The Temple Grandin Equine Center and TACT35:41 Where to watch the documentary37:12 The most memorable compliment they received

    Inside the Making of "An Open Door" with John Festervand

  2. Oct 14

    Temple Grandin: Why High Expectations Beat Overprotection in Autism Parenting

    Dr. Temple Grandin joins Julianna Scott and Kelley Jensen to talk about the refrigerator mother theory this show is named for, and what her own mother's book actually says about it. Temple, a distinguished professor of animal science at Colorado State University and one of the most influential voices in autism parenting, walks through her early speech therapy, why her mother pushed her toward independence instead of stepping in, and how that balance of high expectations and smart accommodations shaped her childhood. The conversation moves through screen time, nutritional deficiencies in restrictive eaters, the overprescribing of medication, the DSM's autism levels, pathological demand avoidance, and how different thinking styles (visual, pattern, and word-fact) point toward different careers. Temple also talks about her mother Eustacia Cutler, who turned 100 last month, and about building a life around a special interest instead of around a diagnosis. Key takeaways: Temple's mother avoided the refrigerator mother theory's worst damage because it hadn't caught on yet when Temple was youngEarly speech therapy centered on three things: learning to talk, taking turns, and basic daily skillsHigh expectations paired with specific accommodations, like a corridor to run in or a cabin away from a ferry horn, built resilienceFood selectivity should be addressed in the kitchen with sensory play, not at the dinner tableUndiagnosed vitamin deficiencies, including scurvy, are showing up in kids with very restricted dietsMedication can help, but too many kids are prescribed multiple drugs at once with little thoughtAutism levels don't work well for young children, since severity can look very different laterVisual thinkers, pattern thinkers, and word-fact thinkers need different paths into careersPathological demand avoidance as a separate profile struck Temple as a poor fit for how her generation was simply expected to do hard thingsShared interests, not forced socializing, are what actually build friendships for autistic kids and adultsResources Mentioned in This Episode Thinking in Pictures by Temple Grandin, the book where she discusses her antidepressant use and includes the chapter "A Believer in Biochemistry"https://www.templegrandin.com The Autistic Brain by Temple Grandin, referenced as part of her body of work on autism and the brainhttps://www.templegrandin.com Animals in Translation by Temple Grandin, referenced as part of her body of workhttps://www.templegrandin.com Visual Thinking by Temple Grandin, discussed in relation to object visualizers, pattern thinkers, and word-fact thinkershttps://www.templegrandin.com Animals Make Us Human by Temple Grandin, discussed for its breakdown of the core emotional systems in mammalshttps://www.templegrandin.com An Open Door: Temple Grandin, a documentary presented by Colorado State University, reflecting on her life and legacy in humane livestock handling, autism rights, and neurodiversity https://www.templegrandindocumentary.com/ The HBO movie Temple Grandin, referenced for its portrayal of the refrigerator mother theory and a scene with a magazine editorhttps://www.hbomax.com/movie/670fcfdd-b70b-4826-8966-66370ee59e7d Westernaires, a self-funded volunteer horse program in Colorado for kids including precision riding drill teamshttps://www.westernaires.org/ The Temple Grandin and Eustacia Cutler Autism Fund, which offers free webinars and papers for parentshttps://www.tgecautismfund.org/ The Temple Grandin plush toy from Future Horizons, a toy company that partnered with Temple on the designhttps://www.futurehorizons.com Source Code by Bill Gates, mentioned as his explanation of being raised to give backhttps://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/742811/source-code-by-bill-gates/ 🔗 Learn More:Website: refrigeratormoms.comInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/refrigeratormoms/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/refrigeratormomsFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/refrigeratormoms/TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@RefrigeratorMoms Refrigerator Moms is sponsored by Brain Performance Technologies, a specialty mental health clinic that offers neuromodulation treatments for mental health conditions including depression, PTSD, OCD, anxiety, ADHD and autism. Our treatments utilize TMS (transcranial magnetic stimulation) protocols including rTMS, aTMS, and MeRT. All of our treatments are drug-free and noninvasive. Call for insurance options or learn more at https://brainperformancetechnologies.com Timestamps:00:00 Intro, the refrigerator mother theory origin00:35 Welcoming Dr. Temple Grandin01:36 Early speech therapy and talking school04:39 How teachers motivated a young autistic child05:06 Early intervention wait lists today06:19 The rise of screens in childhood08:43 Does screen time actually regulate kids11:05 Eustacia Cutler turns 100, pushing with accommodations12:41 Food selectivity and sensory play in the kitchen13:04 Vitamin deficiencies and scurvy in restrictive diets14:15 Medication, overprescribing, and starting doses18:46 DSM autism levels and profound autism20:43 Visual, pattern, and word fact thinking styles23:35 Advice for bullied autistic teens25:58 Building external memory with checklists29:23 The self funded Western Heirs horse program36:13 Eustacia Cutler's isolation and her push to speak39:07 Self-diagnosis and pathological demand avoidance43:16 Making friends through shared interests48:10 The Temple Grandin and Eustacia Cutler Autism Fund52:04 Still doing 100 push ups a day56:44 Not letting a diagnosis define you

    Temple Grandin: Why High Expectations Beat Overprotection in Autism Parenting

  3. Oct 7

    What Nobody Tells You About Autism and Puberty

    Puberty is hard enough without autism in the mix, and almost nobody talks about it honestly. Julianna and Kelley tackle the cringy, necessary conversations that come with an autistic teen's changing body, from hygiene and masturbation to consent, comorbidities, and the difficult question of permanent birth control. Grounded in their own family experience and the Refrigerator Moms research paper on the topic, this is the second in a three part series on autistic teens. Key takeaways: Autistic teens show higher rates of gender dysphoria and reduced sexual awareness compared to peersThe Circles of Intimacy tool, often introduced through ABA, gives kids a visual for who can see or touch their bodyPrivacy and redirection, not shame, are the right response to masturbationHygiene struggles are not a personal autonomy issue and need consistent, team wide messagingPuberty is a common trigger for new or shifting comorbidities like anxiety, depression, and OCDPermanent birth control is a real conversation for some families and deserves years of lead up, not a snap decisionSex ed adapted to a child's functional level belongs in the IEPZones of regulation help teens name feelings that get more abstract during adolescencePornography and unrealistic expectations need direct, ongoing discussion, not silence Resources Mentioned in This Episode HBO, The Pitt: Season 2, Episodes 10 and 11A medical drama referenced for a storyline involving a character's sister and a UTI tied to sexual activity, used as an example of how autistic people's sexuality gets overlooked in fiction Zones of Regulation: https://zonesofregulation.com/A framework for naming and communicating emotions, described as useful for adolescents as feelings become more abstract Sex Ed Rescue: sexedrescue.com/puberty-for-autistic-kidsA hub of articles from sexual health nurse Cath Hakanson on autism and puberty, with guides for girls, boys, and periods. Offers explicit, concrete language and sensory-aware strategies for teaching body changes, hygiene, and privacy. Planet Puberty: planetpuberty.org.auA free resource from Family Planning Australia for parents and caregivers of children with intellectual disability and autism. Organized by topic (body changes, feelings, relationships, identity, safety), with teaching plans, printable resources, and workshops. 🔗 Learn More:Website: refrigeratormoms.comInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/refrigeratormoms/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/refrigeratormomsFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/refrigeratormoms/TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@RefrigeratorMoms Refrigerator Moms is sponsored by Brain Performance Technologies, a specialty mental health clinic that offers neuromodulation treatments for mental health conditions including depression, PTSD, OCD, anxiety, ADHD and autism. Our treatments utilize TMS (transcranial magnetic stimulation) protocols including rTMS, aTMS, and MeRT. All of our treatments are drug-free and noninvasive. Call for insurance options or learn more at https://brainperformancetechnologies.com 00:00 Why nobody talks about autism and puberty00:36 What is the role of parents, doctors, therapists07:23 Circles of Intimacy as an ABA tool09:26 Nonspeaking kids and masturbation privacy12:19 Autonomy and privacy versus safety13:00 Hygiene, smells, and periods15:16 How comorbidities shift during puberty17:05 Consent and permanent birth control23:24 What to do when puberty hits27:57 What not to do, panic and shame28:39 Where to find the paper and more episodes

    What Nobody Tells You About Autism and Puberty

  4. Sep 30

    Pokemon Meltdowns, ABA Controversy, and Phone Bans in Schools

    Julianna Scott and Kelley Jensen dig back into the world of autism parenting social media, starting with a viral thread about a mom whose son melted down over Pokémon cards and the flood of PDA-affirming advice she received in response. Kelley breaks down why most of that advice, dressed up in new language, is really just classic behavioral intervention (delayed gratification, redirection, reward systems) repackaged and sold back to autism parenting communities. The two also take a detour into Julianna's own special interest, the Jane Austen Society, before returning to social media comments on ABA therapy controversy, new state laws banning phones in schools, and the Lindsay Clancy trial and what it reveals about psychotropic medication and postpartum mental health care. Key takeaways: Solving for yes and delayed gratification tactics are sticker charts with new namesPDA-affirming advice often just relabels standard aba therapy strategiesSometimes no is a complete sentence, even in PDA parentingPrivate equity has made ABA therapy staffing chaotic, but the principles still workJulianna's real-life special interest is the Jane Austen Society of North AmericaPhone bans in schools are showing kids handle the friction better than parents expectThe Lindsay Clancy trial raises hard questions about psychotropic medication oversightParents should not self diagnose or opinion shop for medication changes🔗 Learn More:Website: refrigeratormoms.comInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/refrigeratormoms/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/refrigeratormomsFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/refrigeratormoms/TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@RefrigeratorMoms Refrigerator Moms is sponsored by Brain Performance Technologies, a specialty mental health clinic that offers neuromodulation treatments for mental health conditions including depression, PTSD, OCD, anxiety, ADHD and autism. Our treatments utilize TMS (transcranial magnetic stimulation) protocols including rTMS, aTMS, and MeRT. All of our treatments are drug-free and noninvasive. Call for insurance options or learn more at https://brainperformancetechnologies.com 00:00 Pokémon meltdowns and PDA advice begins01:23 The PDA-affirming advice breakdown04:33 Solving for yes is a sticker chart06:07 Can we start saving for the card09:27 Sometimes we just have to accept disappointment12:09 Not about autism: the Jane Austen Society16:20 ABA does nothing, social media comments18:22 State laws banning phones in schools22:07 The Lindsay Clancy trial and medication oversight

    Pokemon Meltdowns, ABA Controversy, and Phone Bans in Schools

  5. Sep 23

    Why Self-Diagnosing Autism Online Can Backfire

    Nearly a third of American adults have self diagnosed a mental health condition, and half of Gen Z has done the same, so Julianna Scott and Kelley Jensen dig into what that means for autism specifically. TikTok checklists promise a diagnosis in ninety seconds, but the criteria on those videos (liking the sound of a hairdryer, having strong opinions, researching a purchase before buying it) has little to do with autism levels or the clinical picture used in an actual assessment. Julianna and Kelley separate the legitimate reasons adults seek out self diagnosis, including cost, long wait lists, and mistrust of the healthcare system, from the diagnostic creep that pathologizes ordinary introversion and everyday bad behavior. They also cover the real harm: diluting the meaning of autism, building an identity that is hard to walk back from, and letting treatable issues like anxiety or undiagnosed ADHD go unaddressed. If you're curious whether an autism diagnosis fits you, this conversation lays out where curiosity is a fine starting point and where the real work has to begin. Key takeaways: Self diagnosis of mental health conditions has spiked sharpest in adults ages 26 to 34TikTok checklists often describe normal human traits, not clinical criteria52% of top ADHD videos and 41% of autism videos studied contain inaccurate medical informationLegitimate barriers to formal diagnosis include cost, access, stigma, and fear of not being believedLoneliness, not TikTok trends, is often the real driver behind the search for a labelA label should be the start of doing the work, not a reason to stop tryingSelf diagnosing without follow up can dilute the public understanding of autism and autism parentingSome conditions mistaken for autism, like anxiety or trauma, are highly treatable on their ownMedication decisions should never be made from an online quiz alone🔗 Learn More:Website: refrigeratormoms.comInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/refrigeratormoms/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/refrigeratormomsFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/refrigeratormoms/TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@RefrigeratorMoms Refrigerator Moms is sponsored by Brain Performance Technologies, a specialty mental health clinic that offers neuromodulation treatments for mental health conditions including depression, PTSD, OCD, anxiety, ADHD and autism. Our treatments utilize TMS (transcranial magnetic stimulation) protocols including rTMS, aTMS, and MeRT. All of our treatments are drug-free and noninvasive. Call for insurance options or learn more at https://brainperformancetechnologies.com\ 00:00 Should You Self-Diagnose Autism?00:09 Nearly A Third Of Adults Self-Diagnose00:53 Why This Trend Is Rising Now01:30 Curiosity, Isolation And Community02:37 How This Differs From Parent Diagnosis03:36 Adolescents And Identity Formation04:13 Is It Users Or Licensed Professionals?05:39 Parents Diagnosing Their Kids Online05:56 Diagnostic Creep Explained07:09 Pathologizing The Normal07:42 When Labels Excuse Bad Behavior09:08 The Loneliness Epidemic Connection10:21 The Work Begins, It Doesn't End10:43 Real Barriers To Formal Diagnosis12:19 The Permission Structure Of A Label15:24 Should Only Autistic People Diagnose?17:14 What Do You Want For Yourself?17:57 The Case Against Self-Diagnosis20:13 Real Harm Of Diluting Autism21:18 Building An Identity Hard To Leave22:05 Who Are These People Really?23:15 What We'd Actually Recommend26:11 Medication Is Not A DIY Decision

    Why Self-Diagnosing Autism Online Can Backfire

  6. Sep 16

    How to Handle Depression as an Autism Parent with Dr. Scott Eilers

    Dr. Scott Eilers, known online as the Depression Doctor, joins Julianna Scott and Kelley Jensen to unpack the tools he built after living through a decade of severe depression himself. The conversation covers why shame loses power the moment it's spoken aloud, why platitudes like "you don't get more than you can handle" fall flat, and why contentment, not happiness, may be the more sustainable goal for parents navigating chronic stress. Dr. Eilers also shares how becoming a special needs parent forced him to refocus his time and energy, and offers a framework for deciding how much access anyone gets into your life. Key takeaways: Shame shrinks when shared; keeping it hidden means only your harshest critic (you) gets a votePlatitudes fail because they overshoot; acknowledging reality works better than forcing positivityConsider the source, both on social media and inside your own head, before absorbing criticismSpecial needs parenting often forces a "KonMari-style" refocusing of time, energy and relationshipsNo two people's parenting can be scientifically compared; there is no experimental controlContentment, not happiness, is the more sustainable emotional target on hard daysImpulsivity often comes down to sleep, food, movement and caffeine, not willpowerNot all anxiety is pathological; some of it is a rational response to real circumstancesGoing no contact with family can be warranted, but boundaries should track a person's actual behavior, not their titleShifting from consumption to creation, even small acts like cooking or a walk, changes how a hard day feelsResources Mentioned in This Episode: When Everything Is Burning by Dr. Scott Eilers, his book written for people dealing with chronic, deep seated depression, discussed throughout the episode as the source of several frameworks covered. https://www.drscotteilers.com/resources/for-when-everything-is-burning-book The Psychology of Depression and Anxiety, Dr. Eilers' podcast, mentioned as part of his body of work. https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOD3pCPK--mHDqVuW75ATxBDsTlK5xVxp The KonMari Method, referenced by Julianna as a comparison point for decluttering relationships and obligations during hard seasons of parenting. https://konmari.com/about-the-konmari-method/?srsltid=AU7gw4X2Mk3MJKt_sdMaQYWC2BnM7yV91AqTnMDf4hGWYcBc85hkdNIU The Minimalists, the podcasting and writing trio whose work on intentional living and letting go of excess reflects the episode's discussion of decluttering as an emotional, not just physical, practice. https://www.theminimalists.com/ 🔗 Learn More:Website: refrigeratormoms.comInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/refrigeratormoms/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/refrigeratormomsFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/refrigeratormoms/TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@RefrigeratorMoms Refrigerator Moms is sponsored by Brain Performance Technologies, a specialty mental health clinic that offers neuromodulation treatments for mental health conditions including depression, PTSD, OCD, anxiety, ADHD and autism. Our treatments utilize TMS (transcranial magnetic stimulation) protocols including rTMS, aTMS, and MeRT. All of our treatments are drug-free and noninvasive. Call for insurance options or learn more at https://brainperformancetechnologies.com 00:00 Cold open: the opposite of depression00:22 Meet Dr. Scott Eilers, the Depression Doctor01:14 Why we wanted to talk about situational depression01:57 Shame grows when sheltered, withers when expressed06:21 Why platitudes fall flat for struggling parents09:23 A realistic statement beats a positive one11:09 Where did "you never get more than you can handle" come from13:01 The KonMari method for your mental clutter15:17 The day early intervention arrived at the door18:14 Considering the source in your own head19:44 Considering the source on social media21:29 The autism industrial complex22:31 When therapy offices aren't built for autistic clients25:07 How to vet a parent coach's credentials26:19 Why so many therapists are becoming coaches29:43 The six lies the world tells you33:35 Redefining what a father provides34:03 Going no contact with family35:36 A framework for safety and openness in relationships38:05 Adaptive versus maladaptive perfectionism40:13 Rewrite the research on your negative beliefs43:07 Why happiness might be the wrong goal46:35 The case for contentment over happiness48:39 Sleep, food, movement and impulsivity50:40 Sorting pathological anxiety from rational anxiety53:26 Creation versus consumption54:36 Where to find Dr. Eilers

    How to Handle Depression as an Autism Parent with Dr. Scott Eilers

  7. Sep 9

    Not About Autism Book Club: We Read The Viral Novel Yesteryear

    Julianna Scott and Kelley Jensen launch the Not About Autism Book Club, with their first pick, Carol Clare Burke's viral bestseller Yesteryear. The novel follows a trad wife influencer who wakes up living in 1855, and the hosts dig into what the book gets right and wrong about performative Christianity, the manosphere, trad wife culture, and social media escapism. They debate the unlikable main character, the polarizing ending, and whether the story's twist actually lands. Spoilers included throughout.  Key Takeaways Yesteryear follows a trad wife influencer who wakes up living in 19th century conditions on her ranchThe hosts discuss the book's central criticism, that Christianity is portrayed as a theatrical villainClementine and the preacher are named as the story's more redeeming, genuinely Christian charactersThe author's writing process, including her rushed first draft and two editors, gets discussed in detailThe rumor that Anne Hathaway ghostwrote the book is addressed and debunkedCaleb's arc into the manosphere sparks a conversation about male identity and validationThe hosts unpack why trad wife content is aspirational fantasy rather than realityThey discuss the book's divisive twist ending and the lack of redemption for the main characterBoth hosts rate the book differently, weighing societal relevance against the quality of the writingThe next book club pick, Ann Patchett's Whistler, is announced at the end Resources Mentioned in This Episode Yesteryear by Carol Clare Burke, the book club's first pick, following a trad wife social media influencer who wakes up living in 1855.Diabolical Lies, the podcast hosted by author Carol Clare Burke. Whistler by Ann Patchett, our next book club pick. 🔗 Learn More Website: refrigeratormoms.comInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/refrigeratormoms/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/refrigeratormomsFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/refrigeratormoms/TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@RefrigeratorMoms Refrigerator Moms is sponsored by Brain Performance Technologies, a specialty mental health clinic that offers neuromodulation treatments for mental health conditions including depression, PTSD, OCD, anxiety, ADHD and autism. Our treatments utilize TMS (transcranial magnetic stimulation) protocols including rTMS, aTMS, and MeRT. All of our treatments are drug-free and noninvasive. Call for insurance options or learn more at https://brainperformancetechnologies.com Timestamps 00:00 Launching the Not About Autism book club01:03 Introducing Yesteryear and its viral buzz01:36 What Yesteryear is about02:06 First impressions of the book03:07 Spoiler warning before the ending talk03:25 Is Christianity the book's villain04:46 A social justice warrior as the real villain05:16 The author's rushed first draft process06:06 Editors and publishers shaping the book07:06 Why Kelley reads acknowledgments07:42 The Anne Hathaway ghostwriter rumor09:36 Fleshing out Caleb's character for film10:20 Sympathy for Caleb's stupidity11:18 Caleb's pull into the manosphere11:55 Social media silos and trad wife fantasy12:21 Was Caleb aware of his own role14:08 The unlikability of Shannon's arc15:22 The reading is sexy shirt moment15:53 Real homesteaders versus influencers16:20 Trad wife ideology meets modern woman17:23 Ballerina Farms and hidden help18:29 Why trad wife content is appealing19:29 Escapism and fantasy in trad wife culture20:10 Trad wife versus stay at home mom21:27 Social media as a sewing circle21:50 No redemption for Natalie22:08 The author's defense of Natalie23:24 Why Natalie is hard to like26:09 Hypocrisy and the manosphere's relevance27:33 Wishing for a time travel twist28:17 The new batch of kids reveal28:37 Questions about Clementine and the warrant29:46 Debating who is worse, Natalie or Caleb30:03 Marital rape and the fantasy of control32:20 Was Natalie drugged the whole time33:11 The unreliable narrator problem34:34 Rating the book on Goodreads35:37 The concept of winning in the story36:59 Announcing the next book club pick

    Not About Autism Book Club: We Read The Viral Novel Yesteryear

  8. Sep 2

    Screen Time, PDA, and College Essays: Our Three Biggest Papers Revisited

    Julianna Scott and Kelley Jensen revisit three of the show's most-discussed refrigerator papers in one sitting: screen time, pathological demand avoidance (PDA), and college readiness. They break down why not all screen time is equal, what to actually do when a child is dysregulated by devices, and why the show remains skeptical of PDA as a standalone diagnostic framework. The conversation closes with a deep dive into college essay coaching for neurodivergent students, covering when and how to disclose a diagnosis, how AI has changed the essay-writing process, and what admissions readers are actually looking for. Key Takeaways Screen time isn't one category: passive consumption differs from educational or interactive useOxford's 2024 word of the year, "brain rot," describes real cognitive effects of low-quality screen contentWeaning a child off screen addiction often takes about two weeks before mood visibly improvesPDA is not a standalone diagnosis in the US and remains an add-on profile to autism in the UKMany PDA-focused "coaches" operate without a therapy license valid in the client's stateAvoiding demands long-term (like indefinite co-sleeping) tends to delay, not resolve, underlying challengesCollege "capable" (grades, test scores) is different from college "ready" (executive functioning, self-advocacy)The Common App personal statement is 650 words; UC personal insight questions are 350 words eachAdmissions readers spend about seven minutes per application on averageDisclosing a diagnosis in a college essay should be brief; the essay should focus on what a student did with the challenge, not the diagnosis itselfThrive College Counseling — the college counseling practice founded by Dr. Marci Schwartz, providing full-service college counseling for neurodivergent students, referenced alongside a companion paper the hosts wrote with her on college readiness.https://www.thrivecollegecounseling.com/ Standout Application Essays — the college essay coaching practice founded by Julianna Scott, offering brainstorming through final polish on college, scholarship, and graduate application essays, with particular experience supporting neurodivergent students and their families through the process.https://www.standoutapplicationessays.com/ 🔗 Learn More:Website: refrigeratormoms.comInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/refrigeratormoms/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/refrigeratormomsFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/refrigeratormoms/TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@RefrigeratorMoms Refrigerator Moms is sponsored by Brain Performance Technologies, a specialty mental health clinic that offers neuromodulation treatments for mental health conditions including depression, PTSD, OCD, anxiety, ADHD and autism. Our treatments utilize TMS (transcranial magnetic stimulation) protocols including rTMS, aTMS, and MeRT. All of our treatments are drug-free and noninvasive. Call for insurance options or learn more at https://brainperformancetechnologies.com 00:00 Revisiting three of our biggest papers00:36 Screen time, PDA, and college readiness ahead02:02 Screen time paper: the four categories03:16 The phone-during-diaper-change moment05:21 Screen time and "brain rot"05:48 Good screens: learning apps and cooking shows06:57 The worst screens: algorithm-driven platforms07:06 What kids did before screens existed08:07 Try a no-screen day experiment08:48 Parents are addicted to screens too10:04 Sponsor: Brain Performance Technologies10:15 What to do about screen addiction12:05 PDA paper: stirring up a hornet's nest12:50 What PDA actually means14:01 The PDA coaching cottage industry15:30 Is what you're doing helpful or hurtful16:26 Sleep and PDA: kicking the can down the road18:11 Study behaviorism before rejecting ABA20:00 College readiness with a college essay coach21:32 The up-all-nighter essay clients21:51 Dr. Marci Schwartz and Thrive College Counseling22:05 College capable versus college ready23:25 Sponsor: Brain Performance Technologies23:49 Common App versus UC personal insight questions26:39 How AI changed college essay coaching29:20 Coaching neurodivergent students on essays30:42 Should students disclose their diagnosis?33:09 Where disclosure belongs in an application36:08 Closing thoughts on college readiness

    Screen Time, PDA, and College Essays: Our Three Biggest Papers Revisited
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4.5
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About

Born from 20 years of friendship, during which they navigated the trenches of autism parenting and advocacy, the Refrigerator Moms is Kelley Jensen and Julianna Scott’s way of reaching out to parents waging the same battles they were.  Their purpose with this podcast is to clear the fog, silence the noise, and find a path through neurodivergence for parents that are stuck between bad choices. They tackle parenting topics such as mom guilt, tantrums, pathological demand avoidance, siblings, medication, comorbidities, social media, and much more. 

Information

  • Creator
    Kelley Jensen, Julianna Scott
  • Years Active
    2025 - 2026
  • Episodes
    69
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © 2025 Refrigerator Moms
  • Show Website
    Refrigerator Moms

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