Perfect Crimes

Joe Jensen and Nate Hanet

Sit in with Joe and Nate as they consult clients on how to go about committing their perfect crimes. New episodes every Tuesday.

  1. 5d ago

    Chris Weber is a Pro-Matrix Keanu Reeves

    One of Cape Cod's finest drives all the way out to see us this week.  We sit down with the hilarious Chris Weber to talk about why he wants to free the robots.  To be fair, it does involve riding around in a giant Megazord.  Talk about a crime with merit.  Like, subscribe, listen now!

    1 hr

  2. Jun 2

    Seth Farley: Professional Streaker

    A lot of fellas get into crime for the money, and Boston's own Seth Farley is no different.  Public events beware, Seth is going to streak across the field so well the cameras can't help but stay on him.  That's how you get that sweet, sweet ad money.

    51 min

  3. May 26

    Pat Lacey Is Burning Down The House (of Oreos)

    Pat Lacey has the fire of revolution inside of him, and he knows how he's going to show it.  By burning down the worst place in the world: The Nabisco Factory.  Should have called them cookies instead of biscuits, Nabisco.

    1h 2m

  4. May 19

    Vi and Iggy Run One of the Nicest Cults You'll Never Regret Joining

    Tell me if you've heard this one--so a Vietnamese girl and Serb walk into a bar, then immediately recruit you to do their bidding.  That's the world we'll be living in once Vi and Iggy get their act together.  Along the way though, we talk about MassLaughsMedia, their budding comedy empire, and war amongst the chimps.  Top tier episode, if you ask me.

    1h 7m

  5. May 5

    Abby Evans, Future Queen of the Boston Speakeasy Scene

    Boston's a pretty great city, aside from one huge problem--No Happy Hours.  Also, bars close at 2AM.  ALSO, where are all the opium dens?  Don't worry, concerned listener, Abby Evans has a solution for you.  That's right, we're bringing back the speakeasy back.  It's going to be the Roaring '20s all over again.

    1h 15m

  6. Apr 28

    We Sit Down to Talk Assassinations with Jon Fletcher

    He was almost a Marine and knows some pretty sick karate moves, so who better to discuss hitmen with than the one and only Jon Fletcher?  How did he lose half a finger?  Was it an operation gone wrong?  Listen to find out!  (BTW as long as you are NOT a rapist or pedophile this episode has absolutely nothing to do with you)

    59 min

  7. Apr 21

    Beau and James Are Going to Show Us Their Weinermobile

    Beau and James (BJS for short) have always known their destiny--for James to die in a fiery car crash, trapped inside the Oscar Meyer Weinermobile as he's grilled alive in a grotesque display of barbecued irony.  Beau, of course, will be watching from a safe distance, cold beer in hand, because that's what good friends do.  How did we come to this Steinbeckian conclusion?  Only one way to find out--listen now!

    1h 16m

  8. Apr 14

    Won't Someone Besides Sarah Fitz Please Think of the Box Turtles?!

    We have the very funny Sarah Fitz on this week to discuss a matter of grave importance--the so-called "government" has banned yet another thing the people care about.  Box Turtle Farms.  You'll never guess what sort of criminal act she has in mind.  Sometimes you've gotta fight for your right to properly care for reptiles in an ideal setting.

    1h 1m
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Ratings & Reviews

5
out of 5
3 Ratings

About

Sit in with Joe and Nate as they consult clients on how to go about committing their perfect crimes. New episodes every Tuesday.

Information

  • Creator
    Joe Jensen and Nate Hanet
  • Years Active
    2025 - 2026
  • Episodes
    44
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    ©2025 Hillbilly Cartel
  • Show Website
    Perfect Crimes