TW: brief mentions of spiritual abuse & eating disorders Many of us are far more eager to please people than we realise, and in ways that quietly place them above ourselves. I think we have the system backwards. It starts with Baba. He should be our starting point. And it's not just about what we can do for people. It's also about who we are in whatever space we occupy, whether the way we show up, the way we exist, is suitable for them. People pleasing isn't only service. It's also performing. Shrinking. Reshaping. Believing that in order to be accepted, there is a version of you that must arrive first. I had to learn that who I am is suitable. As is. Learning to not people-please God, to stop trying to use the same tactics of control we use with people on Him, opened my eyes to something uncomfortable: the version of me that edited herself, gave from empty, always "came through"? The desire may have been valid. But the posture was wrong. It wasn't coming from the right place. It devalued me. It turned me into a courier of servitude rather than someone who was loved and accepted regardless of what I could do, give, or show up for. And that is not how the Lord sees us, and how he sees us should be our first point of validation. Our first place of safety. And here's what I know about Baba: his presence doesn't ask you to position yourself. You don't have to think your way into being pleasing to him. He just wants you to be. That's it. Just be. Because we're talking about a Father you are made in the image of. You lift your hand the way he does. You turn your head the way he does. So when he looks at you, he is pleased, because he is looking right at himself. Whether you believe that or not. It may take time to naturalise, but you will. And the sooner you put down the props, the sooner you stop trying to preempt failure, stop bracing for the moment you get it wrong, stop believing you've already fallen short of being the prim and proper child he requires, the sooner you get to actually enjoy the person he has made you. And enjoy him. In his presence. As yourself. When that foundation isn't there, we don't act from peace. We act from hope, hoping that what we do becomes currency for what we should receive in return. And when the return doesn't come, we keep score. We build resentment. We struggle to forgive. We deem ourselves unlovable. Because we gave from empty. God is the only one to fill that seat. His word should fill that seat. You are important. The way you show up is sufficient, accurate, and just right. It is *from there* that we love, serve, give, forgive, and work out our salvation with fear and trembling, not the other way around. And when the hierarchy is right, when you first let the light of God shine on you and reflect back all the beauty that already exists, and you begin to move from that place, everybody benefits. Every space benefits. Every person you encounter gets to experience the truth of who God made you to be. So if you think you're doing the world a favour by overexerting yourself to prove something that was never true, know this: the world is not gaining. It is missing out. Missing out on you, unmoored from the lie, unburdened, free. Missing out on the God in you. This episode is a love letter to anyone in the middle of the whirlwind that is people-pleasing, who just wants to know what it looks like from the other side. Here's your postcard: it is everything you could ever want it to be. I hope this blesses you. Muah!
