W AP KOUTEM M AP KOUTE W

Oct 22

The Weight of Uncertainty: TPS, Trauma, and Haitian Mental Health

What happens when uncertainty is no longer something happening in the background, but something you are carrying every day? In this special conversation, I am joined by three Haitian mental health professionals: Joane Davis, LPC-S,RPT-S, CCTP; Dr. Gaetane Saint Victor, PhD, LCSW-QS; and Frantzie Pierre, MSW. Together, we create space for a conversation that our community needs right now. This is not a political debate, and it is not legal advice. This is a mental health conversation. We talk about what prolonged uncertainty and fear can do to the body and nervous system, how what is happening can affect children, families, and even people whose own status is not directly impacted, and what it can look like to care for ourselves and one another when the situation itself cannot simply be fixed. We also talk about something deeply connected to our Haitian culture: strength. Kenbe fèm. Faith. Community. The ways these things have helped us survive, but also the ways the expectation to always be strong can sometimes make it harder to say, “I am not okay. I need help.” And we make room for a difficult but necessary conversation about depression and suicide, including the life of Pierre Damas Bel and why our community needs more language, compassion, and understanding around mental health crises. Throughout this conversation, one message continues to come back: We do not have to carry this alone. There is room for fear and hope, Faith and therapy, Strength and asking for help, Grief and gratitude, and there is room for us to hold one another through the uncertainty. L’Union Fait La Force. Featured Mental Health Professionals Aurelie Zephir, LMFTLicensed Marriage and Family Therapist Joane Davis, LPC-S,RPT-S, CCTPLicensed Professional Counselor Supervisor and Registered Play Therapist Dr. Gaetane Saint Victor, PhD, LCSW-QSLicensed Clinical Social Worker and Qualified Supervisor Frantzie Pierre, MSWSocial Worker Resources Mentioned in This Episode Below are some of the resources discussed during our conversation. Availability and services may vary, so please contact each organization directly for the most current information. Ayiti Home Link A resource for Haitians returning to Haiti and families preparing for transition. The platform connects people with resources related to employment, housing, healthcare, mental health, education, legal and documentation needs, emergency services, and community support. It also offers returnee resource guides in English and Haitian Creole. Haitian Therapists Directory A national directory designed to help Haitian individuals and families connect with Haitian mental health and wellness providers. You can search by ZIP code to find providers in your area. Dallas Haitians United A nonprofit serving the Haitian community in the Dallas Fort Worth area. Resources may include assistance with English learning, employment, housing, medical resources, financial support, and navigating life in North Texas. Treetops Collective — Grand Rapids, Michigan A Grand Rapids organization supporting refugees and New Americans through community connection, mental health support, resource navigation, leadership programs, and other services. Catholic Charities Catholic Charities organizations in different states may offer immigration, refugee, legal, resettlement, and community support services. Services vary by location, so search for the Catholic Charities agency serving your area. Community Mental Health Services If you are in Michigan, you can also contact your local Community Mental Health agency for mental health services, crisis support, and connections to local resources. Your Primary Care Provider Your primary care doctor can also be a starting point if you are struggling emotionally. Let them know what you are experiencing and ask for mental health support or a referral. School Counselors If you are concerned about a child or teenager, their school counselor may be able to provide support and connect your family with additional mental health resources. Emergency Rooms and Children’s Hospitals If you or your child is experiencing a mental health crisis, including thoughts of suicide or self-harm, you can go to the nearest emergency room. Children’s hospitals may also have psychiatric or behavioral health teams available to evaluate and support children and families. 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline If you or someone you know is experiencing emotional distress, a mental health crisis, or thoughts of suicide in the United States, call or text 988. The 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline is available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. If there is an immediate danger or medical emergency, call emergency services or go to the nearest emergency room. Lakay Within Community If you are looking for a space to continue taking care of yourself and staying connected, you are welcome to join my free Lakay Within Community. Lakay Within is a free WhatsApp community where I share weekly reflections, journal prompts, self-care and wellness tools, and encouragement to help women slow down, reflect, and reconnect with themselves. You do not have to live in the United States to join. Lakay Within Community Individual Therapy Services I also offer individual therapy for adults in California and Texas. My work focuses on anxiety, depression, trauma, emotional healing, nervous system awareness, and helping women better understand the patterns and experiences that may be affecting how they feel and move through their lives today. If you are interested in therapy with me or would like to learn more about my approach, you can visit my practice website linked below. therapywithaureliezephirlmft Disclaimer This podcast is for educational and reflective purposes only and is not a substitute for therapy, diagnosis, legal advice, or individualized mental health treatment. Resources are provided for informational purposes and do not constitute an endorsement or guarantee of services. If you are struggling emotionally or need support, please reach out to a licensed mental health professional in your area. Get full access to Aurelie Zephir LMFT at aureliezephir.substack.com/subscribe

Oct 8

Gratitude Does Not Erase the Hurt

What happens when you talk about something that hurt you in childhood and the first response is: “But your mother did the best she could.” “You should be grateful.” “At least you had food.” “At least you went to school.” In many Haitian families, talking about childhood hurt can quickly be interpreted as disrespect, blame, or ingratitude. But what if more than one thing can be true? In this episode, I talk about the complexity of loving your parents, understanding their sacrifices, and still acknowledging the ways certain experiences affected you. We also talk about why two people can live through similar experiences and carry them very differently, why boundaries with family can feel so uncomfortable in our culture, and how concern about what people will say can shape the way children are raised and eventually the adults they become. This is not a conversation about turning our parents into bad people. It is about making room for the full story. Understanding where someone came from does not automatically erase the impact of what happened. Furthermore, gratitude does not require silence. Listen to the full episode, and as you do, I want you to be curious about your own story: What have you always told yourself you should be grateful for, and what have you never really allowed yourself to say hurt? Lakay Within Community If this conversation brought something up for you and you are looking for a gentle space to continue reflecting, you are welcome to join my free Lakay Within Community. It is a WhatsApp community where I share weekly reflections, journal prompts, wellness tools, and encouragement to help women slow down, reflect, and reconnect with themselves. The link is below. https://www.transformativehealingpathways.com/lakay-within-community Individual Therapy Services I also offer individual therapy for adults in California and Texas. My work focuses on anxiety, depression, trauma, emotional healing, nervous system awareness, and helping women better understand the patterns that may be keeping them feeling stuck or disconnected from themselves. If you are interested in therapy with me or would like to learn more about my approach, you can visit my practice website linked below. https://www.therapywithaureliezephirlmft.com/ Disclaimer This podcast is for educational and reflective purposes only and is not a substitute for therapy, diagnosis, or individualized mental health treatment. If you are struggling emotionally or need support, please reach out to a licensed mental health professional in your area. Get full access to Aurelie Zephir LMFT at aureliezephir.substack.com/subscribe

Sep 24

One Year Later: Thank You for Listening

It has officially been one year since I started W Ap Koute M, M Ap Koute W. And honestly, this episode is simply a thank you. A thank you to those who have been listening since the beginning, those who found the podcast somewhere along the way, and even those of you who listen quietly without ever saying a word. In this short anniversary episode, I reflect on why I started the podcast, what this first year has meant to me, and why creating space for conversations about mental health, healing, culture, and the things we carry quietly still matters so much to me. But as we move into year two, I also want to hear from you. What do you want us to talk about next? What conversations do you wish somebody would have? What has stayed with you from this first year? After all, W Ap Koute M, M Ap Koute W means you are listening to me, and I am listening to you. So for year two, I want to make sure I keep doing that second part too. Come listen, and then come talk to me. Lakay Within Community If you are looking for another way to stay connected with me, you are also welcome to join my free Lakay Within Community, where I share weekly reflections, journal prompts, wellness tools, and encouragement. The link is below https://www.transformativehealingpathways.com/lakay-within-community Therapy Services I also offer individual therapy for adults in California and Texas. My work focuses on anxiety, depression, trauma, emotional healing, nervous system awareness, and helping women better understand the patterns that may be keeping them feeling stuck or disconnected from themselves. If you are interested in therapy with me or would like to learn more about my approach, you can visit my practice website linked below. https://www.therapywithaureliezephirlmft.com/ Disclaimer This podcast is for educational and reflective purposes only and is not a substitute for therapy, diagnosis, or individualized mental health treatment. If you are struggling emotionally or need support, please reach out to a licensed mental health professional in your area. Get full access to Aurelie Zephir LMFT at aureliezephir.substack.com/subscribe

Sep 10

You Have the Insight. So Why Do You Still Feel Stuck?

What happens when you already have insight into who you are, but you still feel stuck? In this episode of W Ap Koute M, M Ap Koute W, I am joined by Vivian Ip, founder of Tuesday Coaching. Vivian helps late-diagnosed ADHD and autistic professionals turn their insight into action. With an academic background in psychology research, and over 20 years of experience across commercial photography, startups, and tech, Vivian now supports high-achieving neurodivergent professionals through coaching. In this conversation, we talk about ADHD, autism, late diagnosis, therapy, coaching, shame, burnout, and what it means to understand your brain without trying to fix who you are. Vivian shares how many of the people she works with have already done a lot of therapy, have processed parts of their trauma, and have a deep understanding of themselves. But even with that insight, they may still struggle to move forward, take action, or create strategies that actually work with their neurodivergent brain. We also talk about the difference between therapy and coaching. Therapy helps someone process the past, how it affects the present, understand what happened, and unpack the emotional impact of their experiences. Coaching, in Vivian’s work, stays more connected to the present moment and asks: now that you understand this, how do you move with it in your everyday life? This episode also explores how shame shows up when people hear “take action” and assume it means motivation, discipline, or trying harder. From a neurodivergent lens, feeling stuck may have less to do with laziness and more to do with energy, processing, sensory needs, burnout, masking, or trying to fit into a world that was not built with your brain in mind. Vivian also shares how small overlooked details can change everything. Sometimes the thing getting in the way is not the whole plan. It may be one sensory detail, one transition, one moment of overwhelm, one place where the body does not feel safe, or one part of the task that nobody thought to ask about. Toward the end of the conversation, we talk about ADHD and autism beyond a white-centered lens. Vivian shares how gender, race, culture, work, relationships, privilege, and collective identity can shape how people understand neurodivergence, whether they seek diagnosis, and how they make sense of themselves after being late-diagnosed or late-identified. This conversation is a reminder that there is nothing wrong with your brain. You may need support, tools, strategies that are actually made for the way you process the world. However, you do not need to become someone else to be worthy of support. Reflection Question If you have ever felt stuck even after gaining insight, ask yourself: What if this is not about laziness? What if this is not about discipline? What if there is one small detail I have not noticed yet? Is there a sensory need? A transition? A routine? A fear? A place where I am masking? A part of the task that feels unclear? A place where shame is making it harder to understand what I actually need? Sometimes the next step is not forcing yourself to try harder. Sometimes the next step is slowing down enough to understand what is really happening. About Vivian Ip Vivian Ip is the founder of Tuesday Coaching, where she helps late-diagnosed ADHD and autistic professionals turn their insights into action. With an academic background in psychology research, Vivian spent over 20 years helping clients succeed in the commercial photography industry, various startups, and in tech before turning that experience, and her own late ADHD and autism diagnosis, into a coaching practice for high-achieving neurodivergent professionals. You can learn more about Vivian and her work at Tuesday Coaching. Vivian is also speaking at the Social Connections Summit, happening September 23rd and 24th, with the theme “Neurodivergence Plus.” Lakay Within Community Before we close, I also want to invite you to join my free Lakay Within Community. It is a WhatsApp community where I share weekly reflections, journal prompts, wellness tools, and encouragement to help women slow down, reflect, reconnect with themselves, and remember that they do not have to carry everything alone. Here is the link. Therapy Services I offer therapy services for adults in California and Texas through Transformative Healing Pathways. My work focuses on anxiety, depression, trauma, emotional healing, nervous system awareness, and helping clients reconnect with themselves with compassion. Disclaimer This podcast is for educational and reflective purposes only and is not a substitute for therapy, diagnosis, coaching, or individualized mental health treatment. If you are struggling emotionally or need support, please reach out to a licensed mental health professional in your area. Get full access to Aurelie Zephir LMFT at aureliezephir.substack.com/subscribe

Aug 27

When the Quote Feels Good, But the Pattern Comes Back

Have you ever read a quote and felt like it was speaking directly to you? Maybe you saved it, shared it, or said to yourself, “Wow, I needed this.” And then a few days later, the old thought pattern came back. The same fear, doubt, the same way of seeing yourself., and the same way of interpreting what happened. In this episode of W Ap Koute M, M Ap Koute W, I’m talking about why inspirational quotes and affirmations can feel powerful in the moment, but still not fully stay with us when there are deeper beliefs and patterns underneath. A quote can touch something in us. It can give us hope, language, and a moment to breathe. But if there is an old belief inside of us that says something different, the quote may not have a place to land yet. I use the image of the brain as a desktop with folders. Inside those folders are beliefs, stories, experiences, and things we learned about ourselves, relationships, love, safety, family, and the world. When something new happens, the brain tries to figure out where to file it. If it matches an old belief, it is easier for the brain to place it there. If it does not match, the brain may question it, minimize it, or reject it. So when a quote says, “I am worthy,” but the belief underneath says, “I have to earn love,” there may be resistance. When a quote says, “I am allowed to rest,” but the belief underneath says, “If I rest, I am lazy,” the old pattern may still come back. This episode is about understanding why awareness matters first. Before we can receive something new, we may need to understand what we have been carrying. I also share how I think about inspirational quotes in the therapy room. I am cautious with them because when someone is carrying deep beliefs about themselves, their worth, their safety, their needs, or their voice, we usually need to begin by noticing what is already there. What is the thought? What is the belief? Where did it come from? How does it show up in your relationships? How does it show up in your body? How does it show up in the way you rest, receive support, or make decisions? When we begin to name the belief, understand how it once protected us, and question whether it still serves us, then reframing can begin. And the reframe has to be something the nervous system can actually hold. Sometimes we do not need another quote but instead we need to understand why the truth we read had nowhere to stay. And once we begin doing that work, those reminders can start to feel different. They are no longer just words on a screen. They become something we are slowly learning how to live. Reflection Question Think about a quote, affirmation, or reminder that has touched you recently. Maybe it is something you saved, you liked, or something that made you pause. And ask yourself: What did this quote touch in me? What belief inside of me makes this hard to fully receive? What is one small way I can begin creating space for this truth in my life? Because healing is not only about what we repeat. It is also about what we are ready to receive. And sometimes before we can receive something new, we have to understand what we have been carrying. Lakay Within Community If you are looking for a gentle space to continue reflecting, I invite you to join my free Lakay Within Community. It is a space for women to slow down, reflect, reconnect with themselves, and remember that they do not have to carry everything alone. Here is the link. Therapy Services I offer therapy services for adults in California and Texas through Transformative Healing Pathways. My work focuses on anxiety, depression, trauma, emotional healing, nervous system awareness, and helping clients reconnect with themselves with compassion. Disclaimer This podcast is for educational and reflective purposes only and is not a substitute for therapy, diagnosis, or individualized mental health treatment. If you are struggling emotionally or need support, please reach out to a licensed mental health professional in your area. Get full access to Aurelie Zephir LMFT at aureliezephir.substack.com/subscribe

Aug 13

You Don’t Have to Wait Until You’re Ready

Have you ever looked back and realized that if you had not challenged your own fear, your own limitation, or your own belief that you were not ready yet, you would not be where you are today? In this episode of W Ap Koute M, M Ap Koute W, I’m sharing a personal reflection about my own journey of waiting to feel ready. I talk about the moment I was invited to speak for a school district and how that experience made me look back at the version of myself who used to believe I needed more years, another title, or a supervisor role before I could teach, speak, or put myself out there. For a long time, I thought I was preparing. But when I look back now, I can see that some of what I was calling preparation was actually fear. It was limitation. It was me looking outside of myself for permission. In this episode, I share how my career path moved from pre-med, to nursing, to nutrition, to psychology, and eventually to becoming a therapist. I talk about the moments when I felt stuck, the people who helped me reflect, and the ways I kept searching for work that felt meaningful, complex, and connected to helping people. I also reflect on how I compared myself to supervisors and believed I needed to follow someone else’s path before I could trust my own. And then everything started to shift. A conversation with a friend helped me see that the standards I created for myself were not always truth. Some of them were fear. Some of them were self-protection. Some of them were me waiting for someone else to tell me I was ready. This episode is for the person who keeps saying: I need more time, I need more experience, I need to feel more confident, I need someone to choose me, I need to have everything figured out first. Maybe some preparation is needed. But maybe some of it is fear. And maybe the first step is how confidence begins to grow. Because sometimes confidence does not come before we move. Sometimes movement comes first. Sometimes we learn by taking one honest step toward the thing that keeps calling us. Reflection Question What is something you have been waiting to do because you do not feel ready yet? And when you think about that thing, ask yourself: Is this really preparation? Or is this fear? Is this a real requirement? Or is this a limitation I created for myself? What is one small step I can take toward the thing that keeps calling me? Not the whole plan. Not the perfect plan. Just one honest step. Lakay Within Community Before we close, I also want to invite you to join the free Lakay Within Community. It is a WhatsApp community where I share weekly reflections, journal prompts, wellness tools, and encouragement to help you slow down, reflect, and reconnect with yourself. If this episode spoke to something in you, and you are looking for a gentle space to continue reflecting, you are welcome to join us there. You can find the link Here Therapy Services I offer therapy services for adults in California and Texas through Transformative Healing Pathways. My work focuses on anxiety, depression, trauma, emotional healing, nervous system awareness, and helping clients reconnect with themselves with compassion. Disclaimer This podcast is for educational and reflective purposes only and is not a substitute for therapy, diagnosis, or individualized mental health treatment. If you are struggling emotionally or need support, please reach out to a licensed mental health professional in your area. Get full access to Aurelie Zephir LMFT at aureliezephir.substack.com/subscribe

Jul 30

Beyond “Moun Fou”: Severe Mental Illness, Stigma, and Compassion

Have you ever looked at someone’s behavior and assumed you understood what was happening? Maybe you saw someone talking to themselves.Maybe you heard someone being called “crazy” or moun fou.Maybe you watched someone act in a way that did not make sense to you and thought you knew their story. But what if there was so much more happening underneath the surface? In this episode of W Ap Koute M, M Ap Koute W, I’m joined by Frantzie, a clinical social worker who works closely with individuals living with severe mental illness, including schizophrenia, psychosis, bipolar disorder, and other conditions that are often misunderstood. Together, we talk about what severe mental illness can look like when someone is untreated, how medication can help reduce symptoms like hallucinations, paranoia, and confused thinking, and why someone living with schizophrenia is not “crazy,” dangerous, or lost. We also talk about something that is deeply important in our Haitian community: stigma. Growing up in Haiti, many of us saw people struggling with severe mental illness in the streets. Some were isolated. Some were ridiculed. Some were labeled quickly without anyone asking what they might be experiencing, what support they needed, or what treatment could have changed for them. This conversation is about understanding. It is about remembering that behavior is often communication. It is about seeing beyond what is visible and asking, “What might be happening underneath this?” Frantzie also reminds us that faith and mental health treatment do not have to compete with each other. We can pray, have faith, and still seek professional support. One does not cancel out the other. At the heart of this episode is one message: Severe mental illness is not a character flaw.It is not something to be ashamed of.And people living with mental illness deserve dignity, care, compassion, and support. In This Episode We talk about: * What schizophrenia and psychosis can look like when untreated * Why someone hearing voices or experiencing paranoia should not be dismissed or ridiculed * How medication can support stability and daily functioning * Why arguing with someone’s hallucination or delusion usually does not help * How to respond with empathy without pretending you share the same reality * The harm caused by labels like “crazy” or moun fou * Why behavior is often communication * How Haitian cultural stigma can affect treatment and support * Why faith and professional mental health care can work together * How families can support loved ones who may need psychiatric care * Why compassion can change how people experience mental illness and healing Reflection Question The next time you see someone behaving in a way you do not understand, pause and ask: What might be happening underneath what I can see? Because sometimes what we call “crazy” is actually pain, fear, confusion, illness, or a person trying to survive without the support they need. Lakay Within If this conversation resonated with you, I would love to invite you to Lakay Within, my monthly virtual gathering for Haitian women. Lakay Within is a space where we slow down, reflect, connect, and make room for healing in community. Our next gathering will take place on August 11. If you are not quite ready for the virtual gathering, you are also welcome to join the free Lakay Within Community, where I share reflections, journal prompts, wellness tools, and encouragement throughout the month. Both links: Lakay Within Lakay Within Community Therapy Services Aurelie Zephir, LMFT, offers therapy services for adults in California and Texas through Transformative Healing Pathways. Her work focuses on anxiety, depression, trauma, emotional healing, nervous system awareness, and helping clients reconnect with themselves with compassion. Disclaimer This podcast is for educational and reflective purposes only and is not a substitute for therapy, diagnosis, psychiatric care, medication management, or individualized mental health treatment. If you or someone you love is experiencing symptoms of severe mental illness, psychosis, or emotional distress, please reach out to a licensed mental health professional, psychiatrist, crisis resource, or emergency support service in your area. Get full access to Aurelie Zephir LMFT at aureliezephir.substack.com/subscribe

Jul 16

Maybe Monday Isn’t the Problem

Have you ever noticed that Sunday night or Monday morning can feel heavy before the week even begins? In this episode of W Ap Koute M, M Ap Koute W, I’m reflecting on the emotional and nervous system shift that can happen when the weekend ends and the week begins. Even when the weekend is busy, it still has a different rhythm. And then Monday comes, and your body begins preparing for responsibility again. Work. Clients. Children. Schedules. Routines. Meals. School. Emails. All the things. I share a personal reflection about realizing that Mondays feel different for me when my husband is home. Not because every responsibility disappears, but because safe connection helps my nervous system feel more regulated. This episode is about co-regulation, safe relationships, emotional safety, Haitian cultural expectations around strength, and why so many of us learned to carry quietly. It is also a reminder that nervous system regulation is not always something we do alone. Sometimes our body feels safer because we are connected to someone who feels safe. If Monday feels heavy for you, it does not mean you are lazy, ungrateful, or weak. It may mean your body is feeling the transition and asking for more support, softness, structure, or connection. Maybe Monday isn’t the problem. Maybe your nervous system is asking for a softer transition. Reflection Question Think about a time when your body felt calmer because of someone’s presence. What was different? Was it their tone? The way they listened? The way they helped without making you feel small? The way you could be yourself? The way your body did not have to brace? And then ask yourself: How can I create more of that in my life in small, honest ways? Lakay Within If you are looking for a space where we continue conversations like this, I want to invite you to Lakay Within, my monthly virtual gathering for Haitian women. Lakay Within is a space where we slow down, reflect, reconnect, and make room for healing in community. Our next gathering will take place on August 11. If you are not quite ready for the monthly gathering, you are also welcome to join the free Lakay Within Community, where I share reflections, journal prompts, wellness tools, encouragement, and updates throughout the month. Therapy Services I offer therapy services for adults in California and Texas through Transformative Healing Pathways. My work focuses on anxiety, depression, trauma, emotional healing, nervous system awareness, and helping clients reconnect with themselves with compassion. Join the free Lakay Within Community:https://chat.whatsapp.com/KOhFWacGTPGGwkQ6UqDLjW Learn more about Lakay Within, and therapy services:www.transformativehealingpathways.com Disclaimer This podcast is for educational and reflective purposes only and is not a substitute for therapy, diagnosis, or individualized mental health treatment. If you are struggling emotionally or need support, please reach out to a licensed mental health professional in your area. Get full access to Aurelie Zephir LMFT at aureliezephir.substack.com/subscribe

W AP KOUTEM M AP KOUTE W

The Weight of Uncertainty: TPS, Trauma, and Haitian Mental Health

Gratitude Does Not Erase the Hurt

One Year Later: Thank You for Listening

You Have the Insight. So Why Do You Still Feel Stuck?

When the Quote Feels Good, But the Pattern Comes Back

You Don’t Have to Wait Until You’re Ready

Beyond “Moun Fou”: Severe Mental Illness, Stigma, and Compassion

Maybe Monday Isn’t the Problem

Trailer

Breaking the silence, healing the heart, and reclaiming our stories

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W AP KOUTEM M AP KOUTE W

Episodes

The Weight of Uncertainty: TPS, Trauma, and Haitian Mental Health

Gratitude Does Not Erase the Hurt

One Year Later: Thank You for Listening

You Have the Insight. So Why Do You Still Feel Stuck?

When the Quote Feels Good, But the Pattern Comes Back

You Don’t Have to Wait Until You’re Ready

Beyond “Moun Fou”: Severe Mental Illness, Stigma, and Compassion

Maybe Monday Isn’t the Problem

Trailer

About

Information