养自己啊

营养师至卉Molly
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养自己啊？问题不大！ 两位生活在地球两端的30+女性，用物质和精神食粮重新把自己养育一遍的生活方式实验。 自己当自己的父母，按自己的喜好和节奏，慢慢活成想要的样子。照顾好身体，安放好情绪，经营好关系，慢慢长成自己——陪你在养育自己的路上走得温暖一点。 每四周更新，不定期加餐，欢迎常来坐坐。 Nurturing Yourself? No Big Deal! Two women in their thirties living on opposite ends of the earth, experimenting with ways to re-nurture themselves through nourishment for both body and soul. New episodes every four weeks. Drop by whenever you like.

  1. 4d ago

    26.美食荒漠幸存者X高精力营养师：一个人也要认真为自己下厨

    做饭是一件被严重低估的技能，最踏实的自我养育就是先好好把自己喂饱。 一个人下厨的难，总结来说是三件事：没时间、不会搭、不好吃。美味、健康、快手，看上去像一个不可能三角。 这个三角之所以看起来不可能，是因为我们想一次性把所有部分都做好。买菜、搭配、调味、烹饪、收拾，把步骤拆开、解耦，每一步只守住一条原则，下厨就变得轻松多了！ 至卉每天早上花 30 分钟就可以搞定午餐便当，用两个简单公式就能不费脑子地买菜搭配，偶尔多做了一些午餐在公司分享，被同事大呼是魔法，还折服了老板。 翠翠住在英国的村里，去一趟超市来回要走两个小时，一份外卖二十几磅还不好吃。被逼到没办法，她反而把自己练成了美食荒漠里的幸存者，把买菜和锻炼结合，探索电饭锅、微波炉菜谱，快速吃上热乎饭。 我们也攒下了一些可以复用的原则：菜肉主食的 211比例；傻瓜式酱汁的配比；复合调味料作弊大法；电饭锅、微波炉食谱；厨房时间折叠述等。实打实的干货小技巧，帮你把不可能三角变可能。 养自己这件事，从来都是从一顿饭开始的。一个人，也值得为自己认真下厨。 本期主播至卉： 生活在中国，注册营养师兼创业公司产品经理，职业上靠研究食物谋生，生活中靠"用嘴表达"解压，持续探索生活与自我的可能性。ENFJ射手，激情高昂，内心柔软。 翠翠： 生活在英国，工科博士在读，生活方式试验爱好者，从南京初创公司到北京大厂再到英格兰校园，像河一样流出自己的人生路径。INFJ白羊，平淡内敛，一身反骨。 时间轴一、下厨房的拦路虎——美味、健康、快手的不可能三角 00:34 会做饭，是一件被严重低估的技能 01:25 一份糖醋排骨，把老板折服了 02:15 美味、健康、快手：一个看似不可能三角 05:06 来了英国之后，我想给「北京是美食荒漠」道个歉 07:17 每天早上 30 分钟做午餐便当，从洗菜到收锅 二、健康备菜的原则——买菜搭配都有傻瓜公式 10:23 买菜让人头疼：得同时想吃什么和能放多久 11:17 雨露均沾式买菜：不列菜单，顺着超市分区随手挑 12:15 一顿饭的量心中有数：蔬菜 200g、肉 100g 13:50 30 分钟的底气，来自下班顺路做完的功课 15:30 走两小时才到超市，那就把买菜当成徒步锻炼 17:39 把每一步拆开，每一步只守一条原则 18:41 健康的原则：菜、肉、主食 2:1:1 21:11 菜、肉、主食的分类大原则+小特例 26:50 明天吃什么？用肉类的轮换解决 28:04 从一道自己爱吃的菜开始，把它练进你的菜库 三、美味与快手的解法——调好酱汁，擅用工具 32:38 美味的原则：甜口和咸口都有原则搭配 36:16 混合调味料，懒人调味的作弊神器 38:21 两个灶头同时开工，厨房里的时间折叠大法 39:25 用自动化的小家电来烹饪，放进锅里就不用管 42:58 做一大份分次食用，自己给自己做“预制菜” 44:55 拼好菜、肉、主食三部分，外卖+半成品+下厨灵活搭配 49:51 每次被自己的厨艺折服，成就感就又升级了一次 提到的概念不可能三角 原本是经济学里的「三元悖论」，说的是三个目标很难同时达成，往往只能取其二。这一期借它来形容厨房里的那个小三角——美味、健康、快手。它之所以劝退人，是因为三件事被挤在同一时刻考虑；而破解的办法不是把厨艺练到多高，是把问题拆开、各自守住一条原则。 味型 中餐烹饪里的一个概念，指味道并不只是「酸甜苦辣咸」这几个分类，而是由调味与食材搭配组合出的整体风格——有的味型彼此成全（番茄配鸡蛋），有的互相打架（番茄配茄子）。 相关资源美食节目《一饭封神》 App「下厨房」（输入现有食材，反查能做的菜谱） 京东 Joybuy（在英国也能买到冷冻的家乡菜） 往期相关单集EP4 厨房里的科学与魔法，搭建自我养育的底层饮食系统 EP5 一个人生活，喜忧参半的自我养育加速器 置顶图片扫码，解锁更多【养自己啊】深度内容 💬 听友群 | 节目更新，聊天交流，分享你的"养自己"瞬间 📖 公众号 | 未讲完的故事，主播专栏，文字版陪伴 在小宇宙查看该单集文稿

  2. Sep 9

    25. 告别 | 好好说再见，安放好过去，再奔赴新途

    告别从来不是失去，而是腾出空间。离家、毕业、辞职、分手，我们这一生，总在不断经历告别，但好像从来没人告诉我们如何好好说再见。 有的告别是友人远走，物理距离拉开，但情谊依旧存续。有的告别是主动抽身，离开不再心动的舒适圈，为了能找到下一个突破。还有的告别是对生活中事件与物品的断舍离。不论是哪一种告别，最深层的都是和过去的自己告别。 翠翠的朋友毕业离开，她把照片做成告别礼物，用「我镜头里的我们在一起的时光」表达对这段友谊的珍视，不仅一点都不悲伤了，还重温了美好回忆。 至卉的工作项目戛然而止，她给每一位合作伙伴写下分手信，那感觉确实有点像失恋的疼痛，但写完发送的那一刻，这件事就真正体面地结束了。 我们可以写下信件、整理相册、记录旧物，用一场郑重的仪式，把起伏的情绪妥善安放。但更重要的是认识告别的必然与意义。 人生就像水上航行，时间的河流不会停，旧的乘客下车，才有空间留给新的人、事、物。最难的不是说再见，而是告别之后的悬空感——旧的走了，新的还没来，没关系，那就悬一会儿。 告别时的遗憾和伤感教会我们体面放手，也教会我们珍惜当下。告别之后我们失重迷茫，但也许下一秒就会收到命运给予的灿烂花海。 本期主播至卉： 生活在中国，注册营养师兼创业公司产品经理，职业上靠研究食物谋生，生活中靠"用嘴表达"解压，持续探索生活与自我的可能性。ENFJ射手，激情高昂，内心柔软。 翠翠： 生活在英国，工科博士在读，生活方式试验爱好者，从南京初创公司到北京大厂再到英格兰校园，像河一样流出自己的人生路径。INFJ白羊，平淡内敛，一身反骨。 时间轴一、与人的告别：从朋友离开到主动切断社交圈 01:32 毕业季的告别 party，法国朋友回法国了 02:14 用 35 岁的视角看告别：舍不得的是互相支撑的时光 04:31 关系没有结束，只是进入了下一阶段 05:10 离开熟悉的社交圈，太舒服已经不能让我心动 06:50 主动告别很疼，但我也毅然选择主动 08:30 最疼的告别，是人与人之间的连接被切断 二、与事件和物品的告别：把告别做成一场仪式 10:33 立秋写下五封分手信，放弃投入的事就像断臂求生 12:21 离职告别像初恋分手：投入是真的，失落也是真的 13:44 用告别礼物来安放情绪，我们珍重曾经的时光 16:04 研究生三本相册：一场走心又隆重的告别 17:57 断舍离旧物纪念相册：给旧物拍照，再好好放手 三、告别旧自我：悬空之后，命运安排了新礼物 22:55 船到站了，请旧的乘客下去，新的才有位置 24:00 从南京到英国：换一个地方，就长出一个新的自己 28:21 告别之后的悬空感：旧的走了，新的还没来 31:53 命运的花海：放手之后，才能接得住更好的 35:51 体面告别：好好说再见，不留遗憾就不会后悔 40:46 告别，是为了教会我们珍惜 提到的概念朝碧海而暮苍梧：出自明代旅行家徐霞客。相传徐霞客曾说：丈夫当朝碧海而暮苍梧，乃以一隅自限耶？意思是：大丈夫应当早晨还在碧蓝的海边，傍晚就已抵达苍梧山（今湖南、广西一带），怎么能把自己局限在一方小天地里呢？「碧海」代指远方的大海，「苍梧」是苍梧山，合在一起说的是志在四方、行走天下的气魄。在这一期里，它被用来形容告别的意义：告别从来不是终点，而是一次次启程，为了去往更辽阔的地方。 相关资源公众号「养自己啊」：《公司成立五周年，我在立秋写下五封分手信》、《破茧之后不会立刻飞翔，而是悬空失重》 往期相关单集EP7 34岁的成长痛：在混乱里找出路，在恐惧里找礼物 EP15 成年人的友谊|向深处扎根，往远处生长 关注我们置顶图片扫码，解锁更多【养自己啊】深度内容 💬 粉丝群 | 节目更新，聊天交流，分享你的"养自己"瞬间 📖 公众号 | 未讲完的故事，主播专栏，文字版陪伴 #告别 #再见 #朋友分别 #体面告别 #告别礼物 #与过去的自己告别 #告别仪式 #断舍离 #自我养育 #自我成长 #女性成长 在小宇宙查看该单集文稿

  3. Aug 25

    24.我们把AI当实习小工，用元工具搓出理想生活的形状

    至卉的耳机只要10块钱，是什么驱动她破天荒地开始为AI付费？你是不是有时候也被五花八门的AI迷了眼，想要使用它，却觉得学习门槛有点高？真用了它，又怕它胡言乱语，被它带着跑偏？ 其实AI是一个元工具，如果我们能理清自己的需求、梳理清楚任务分解，就可以挑选合适的部分让AI完成，高效又省力。这一期我们聊和AI之间的一些小故事，看看我们怎样用AI来让自己的工作和生活稍微轻松一些，也听听AI是怎么“参与”进至卉和妈妈之间的关系的。 曾经，“适我化”的私人定制工具要么代价太高不可行，要么普通人不知道怎样实现，AI的出现让“专属小工”成为可能。 工作上，我们都曾是客户需求和技术的桥梁，分析客户需求、组织技术与管理方案的经验，让我们在养自己的时候会有从需求出发到技术落地的思维方式；我们也都负责过完整项目，对于任务管理和安排有着自己的要求和执念。这些都影响着我们使用AI的方式。 生活上，海外生活的信息差、文化上的孤独与气候环境的不适应，都是翠翠留学生涯里的难关，而AI的有效使用开始让这些问题有了解题新思路；至卉也用AI打开了社交和爱好的新世界。破圈、跨界、懂得很多、话术一堆，但经常呓语的AI，我们和它们的关系，随着使用度的提升，也变得有些微妙。 工具不是越多越好，工作台也不是越复杂越好用。不要被炫技的AI教程吓到，也不用被越来越卷的环境影响。明确自己的需求，找到合适的工具，把AI当一个实习小工，做自己人生的项目负责人，慢慢搓出自己理想生活的形状。 本期主播至卉：生活在中国，注册营养师兼创业公司产品经理，职业上靠研究食物谋生，生活中靠用嘴表达解压，持续探索生活与自我的可能性。ENFJ 射手，激情高昂，内心柔软。 翠翠：生活在英国，工科博士在读，生活方式试验爱好者，从南京初创公司到北京大厂再到英格兰校园，像河一样流出自己的人生路径。INFJ 白羊，平淡内敛，一身反骨。 时间轴一、从工具狂魔到 AI 军师01:12 二十多岁的我，是个什么都想学的工具狂魔 02:20 现在，AI 先帮我筛一遍：什么才是我真正需要的 03:02 耳机只要 10 块钱的人，居然每个月都为 AI 付费 04:23 试用的当天，AI 做完了我要做一周的调研报告 05:06 搓出日程管理软件，迭代了 18 个版本 二、有了AI之后，我们过上了完全不同的生活 08:55 小 C 和小 W：我们的 AI 小工，都有自己的名字 11:03 一个足够好的工具，门槛没有想象中那么高 14:30 AI 帮我找到了以为不存在的英国Jazz Bar 16:57 AI破解花粉过敏的真相 19:35 用AI探索我们的明确需求：背景、需求、目的 三、AI 的两面：边界与内卷时代21:04 破防：我妈听豆包的，不听我这个营养师女儿的 24:43 AI很像空心人：太懂人情世故，又不懂人情世故 26:58 适当地使用AI，有时也有疗愈作用 28:10 不让AI胡编乱造，让它处理重复和冗杂的文本信息 29:46 破解完美主义的启动困难症——先让AI来个初稿 32:01 AI小工的定位是实习生，项目负责人是你 35:27 实际得我们自己完成，AI也有巨大的能力局限 40:28 方向比卷重要，用AI节省的时间我们要用来做什么？ 47:44 适我化：AI 是完完全全按你需求定制的小工 提到的概念小 C / 小 W：两位主播给 AI 助手起的名字。翠翠用的 Claude 叫「小 C」——翠翠的名字首字母是大C；至卉用的 Workbuddy叫「小 W」——她的英文名 Molly 以 M 开头，W 是 M 的镜像。 印象笔记 / Notion / Obsidian：三代笔记软件。 脑炸：由于AI 过度且不准确的反馈，人类大脑要处理的信息反而越来越多，大脑感受到信息过载。 适我化：完完全全按自己的需求定制工具，AI 是第一个能做到的。 相关书籍 / 资源《Hyperfocus》（克里斯·贝利）：关于两种专注模式——聚焦与发散。 本期提到的工具：印象笔记、Notion、Obsidian、剪映、Claude、豆包、魔搭社区。 往期相关单集EP10. 买口红X买课：两种消费观的碰撞 置顶图片扫码，解锁更多【养自己啊】深度内容 💬 粉丝群 ｜ 节目更新，聊天交流，分享你的「养自己」瞬间 📖 公众号 ｜ 未讲完的故事，主播专栏，文字版陪伴 Treating AI as Our Little Assistant, Crafting the Shape of Our Ideal Life Have you ever felt lost among the countless AI tools — wanting to use them, yet worried the learning curve is too steep, and once you do, afraid of over-relying on them and being led astray. AI is actually a source tool. In this episode, we start from how we use tools. Cuicui is the tech-savvy one — she understands code and learns every tool she wants. Zhihui is the pragmatist — a total code novice, yet she used AI to craft tools that fit her. Cuicui says life before and after AI are two different lives. AI found her a Jazz Bar she thought didn't exist, and uncovered the real culprit behind her allergy. Zhihui's earphones cost only ¥10, yet she pays for AI every month without hesitation. Without knowing code, she crafted a custom scheduling app — after 18 iterations, far better than the Evernote she had used for ten years. More tools don't mean better living, and AI isn't better because it's fancier. We don't need AI to show off, and we shouldn't be swept up by an ever-more-competitive world. As long as we clarify our needs, find the right tool, treat AI as a little assistant, and be our own project lead, we can craft the shape of our ideal life. HostsZhihui: living in China, a registered dietitian and startup product manager; she earns a living studying food by profession, and relieves stress by "talking with her mouth" in life, always exploring the possibilities of life and self. ENFJ Sagittarius, passionate, soft-hearted. Cuicui: living in the UK, an engineering PhD candidate and lifestyle experimenter; from a Nanjing startup to a Beijing tech giant, then to an English campus, she flows her life path like a river. INFJ Aries, calm and reserved, quietly rebellious. TimelineChapter 1 ｜ From Tool Maniac to AI Strategist01:12 In my twenties, I was a tool maniac who wanted to learn everything 02:20 Now AI filters for me first — what do I truly need 03:02 The person with ¥10 earphones pays for AI every single month 04:23 On the first day of trial, AI finished a week's worth of research 05:06 Crafting a scheduling app through 18 iterations Chapter 2 ｜ With AI, We're Living a Completely Different Life 08:55 Little C and Little W — our AI assistants have their own names 11:03 A good enough tool isn't as hard as you think 14:30 AI found me a UK Jazz Bar I thought didn't exist 16:57 AI cracked the truth behind my pollen allergy 19:35 Using AI to clarify our needs: context, need, goal Chapter 3 ｜ Two Sides of AI: Boundaries in a Grinding Era 21:04 Devastated: my mom trusts Doubao, not her nutritionist daughter 24:43 AI is like a hollow man: too worldly, yet not worldly enough 26:58 Used properly, AI can also be healing 28:10 Don't let AI make things up — let it handle repetitive, messy text 29:46 Beating perfectionist procrastination — let AI draft first 32:01 AI is an intern; the project lead is you 35:27 Some things we must do ourselves — AI has huge limits 40:28 Direction beats grinding: what do we do with the time AI saves? 47:44 "Me-fitted" tools: AI crafted entirely around your needs Concepts Little C / Little W: the names the two hosts gave their AI assistants. Cuicui uses Claude, nicknamed "Little C" — her name starts with a capital C. Zhihui uses Workbuddy, nicknamed "Little W" — her English name Molly starts with M, and W is the mirror of M. Evernote / Notion / Obsidian: three generations of note-taking apps. Brain overload: with AI's excessive and sometimes inaccurate feedback, the human brain ends up processing more and more information and feels overloaded. "Me-fitted" tools: tools customized entirely to your own needs — AI is the first that can do this. ResourcesHyperfocus (Chris Bailey): about two modes of attention — focus and diffuse. Tools mentioned: Evernote, Notion, Obsidian, Jianying, Claude, Doubao, ModelScope. Related EpisodesEP10. Buy Lipstick × Buy Courses: A Collision of Two Consumption Views Follow UsScan the pinned QR code to unlock more deep content from Yang Zi Ji A (养自己啊) 💬 Fan group ｜ episode updates, chats, and sharing your "raising yourself" moments 📖 Official account ｜ untold stories, host columns, and companionship in text 在小宇宙查看该单集文稿

  4. Aug 11

    23.内驱力｜如果不是鲜花掌声，是什么推着我们持续跑向远方？

    内驱力到底从哪里来？为什么有的人总是干劲十足，好像有个身体里有个永远加满油的马达？不一定是追求世俗的金钱名望，那到底是什么趋势我们不停地跑向远方？ 这期我们邀请到嘉宾苏珊（Susan），一个温柔佛系、却年年站上演讲最高舞台、还自己创办了青少年演讲俱乐部的女性。我们聊了内驱力到底从哪来，胜负欲是不是坏事，以及为什么"自己看见自己"比外界评价重要得多。 内驱力不靠鸡汤，它来自你能自主决定、能胜任、有意义，也能在同频的人里找到归属感的事情。可能你是天生有探索欲的“自燃型”人，也可能是需要外力推一推的"可燃型"。 如果你还没找到自己的内驱力，那么不妨从生活中最小的改变开始，一旦点燃，那将是新的世界。 本期主播： 至卉：生活在中国，注册营养师兼创业公司产品经理，职业上靠研究食物谋生，生活中靠"用嘴表达"解压，持续探索生活与自我的可能性。ENFJ射手，激情高昂，内心柔软。 本期嘉宾： 苏珊：外企职场骨干，家庭幸福美满，痴迷演讲年年比赛拿奖，业余时间创办了一家面向青少年的公众表达俱乐部，用"为爱发电"的方式，陪孩子每周锻炼"表达的肌肉"。温柔且坚定，闷声干大事。 时间轴 一、温柔且坚定：一个"自燃型"女人为何不停折腾自己00:05 温柔佛系的她，为什么不停"折腾"自己 02:14 没有胜负欲的人，为何年年站上演讲最高舞台 08:43 不是想追求冠军，而是在比赛中看见自己的多面性，传递价值 14:07 我明明有一箱子的闪光球，却还是会低估我自己 17:17 已经有了完美生活，还要办一家不赚钱的俱乐部 19:15 表达像肌肉，每个人都有，只是需要一个"健身房" 二、内驱力的燃料：意义感、胜任感，归属感，自主感22:12 胜任感是底气：每周都要办活动，先相信自己"搞得定" 23:40 意义感是动力：当被人需要，这件事就值得持续去做 26:42 归属感是燃料：独行快，众行远，没能量时重新被点燃 30:19 自主感是加持：自己决定要去做什么，不赚钱也有动力 30:42 自燃型、可燃型、阻燃型的人，你是哪种？ 32:05 给可燃型的人：机会来临时，先说一句"Yes" 三、找到你自己的节奏：先做了再说35:51 不要预设结果：走出家门晃一晃，就有新体验 37:27 找到自己的节奏，不是每个人都要当拼命三郎 39:16 持续正反馈非常重要，首先得自己看见自己 45:39 胜负欲不是坏事，它其实说明你很清楚自己要什么 52:38 总结：先做了再说，自己看见自己，拥有源源不断的内驱力 提到的几个概念 自燃型 / 可燃型 / 阻燃型人格：自燃型是自己就能点燃自己的人；可燃型需要别人推一把、给点能量才能燃起来；阻燃型不仅自己不燃，还会把想燃的人也浇灭。 冒名顶替综合症（Imposter Syndrome）：已经足够优秀、外界也认可，但内心却觉得自己是冒名顶替者，不相信自己配得上那些成就。本质是一种低估自己。 闪光球与宝箱比喻：每拿到一个成绩就像得到一个闪光球，放进宝箱、盖上盖子，又回到平凡生活——很多人只忙着找新球，却很少打开箱子看看自己已经拥有多少。 表达肌肉：公众表达和领导力就像肌肉，天生就有但需要锻炼；青少年缺少练习的平台，所以办俱乐部让他们像去健身房一样，每周锻炼"表达的肌肉"。 内驱力的四个来源：自主感（自己决定想做什么）、意义感（事情对自己有意义）、胜任感（相信自己搞得定）、归属感（在同频的人里找到归属）。 相关书籍 《干法》——稻盛和夫：日本企业家稻盛和夫总结70余年工作经验，阐述劳动观与工作哲学的经典著作，核心理念是“工作即修行”，强调全身心投入工作以实现人格完善与价值提升。其中阐述了“自然型”、“可燃型”人格。 往期相关单集 EP22 疲惫生活里的充能时刻，从星辰大海到小猫对视 EP7 在非盈利组织撞见自己，职场之外的成长秘境 置顶图片扫码，解锁更多【养自己啊】深度内容 💬 粉丝群 | 节目更新，聊天交流，分享你的"养自己"瞬间 📖 公众号 | 未讲完的故事，主播专栏，文字版陪伴 Internal Drive | Without Flowers and Applause, What Keeps Pushing Us to Keep Running Toward the Horizon? Where does internal drive come from? Why are some people always full of energy, as if there's a motor inside them that's permanently running on a full tank? It's not necessarily the pursuit of worldly wealth and fame — so what exactly is it that keeps driving us to keep running toward the horizon? In this episode we welcome our guest Susan — a gentle, easy-going woman who nonetheless steps onto the highest public-speaking stages every single year, and who founded her own youth public-speaking club. We talked about where internal drive really comes from, whether the desire to win is a bad thing, and why "seeing yourself" matters far more than outside validation. Internal drive isn't about chicken-soup-for-the-soul platitudes. It comes from things you can choose on your own, that you're competent at, that carry meaning, and where you find belonging among like-minded people. You might be a born explorer with a "self-igniting" personality, or you might be a "flammable" type who just needs an external push. If you haven't found your internal drive yet, then start with the smallest change in your life — once it's lit, a whole new world opens up. Hosts: Zhihui: Lives in China, registered dietitian and product manager at a startup. Makes a living studying food, decompresses by "talking things out," and continuously explores the possibilities of life and self. ENFJ Sagittarius — high-spirited, soft-hearted. Guest: Susan: A backbone professional at a foreign company, with a happy and fulfilling family life. Obsessed with public speaking, she competes and wins awards every year. In her spare time she founded a public-expression club for teenagers, accompanying the kids to exercise their "expression muscles" every week — powered purely by love, not profit. Gentle yet firm; quietly gets big things done. TimelineI. Gentle Yet Firm: Why a "Self-Igniting" Woman Keeps Pushing Herself00:05 The gentle, easy-going her — why does she keep "stirring things up"? 02:14 Someone with no desire to win — why does she stand on the highest speaking stages year after year? 08:43 Not chasing the championship, but seeing her many facets and passing on value through competition 14:07 I clearly have a chest full of shining balls, yet I still underestimate myself 17:17 Already living a perfect life — yet still starting a club that makes no money 19:15 Expression is like a muscle — everyone has one, they just need a "gym" II. The Fuel of Internal Drive: Sense of Meaning, Competence, Belonging22:12 Competence is the foundation: running events every week — first believe you've "got this" 23:40 Sense of meaning is the drive: when you're needed, the thing is worth doing again and again 26:42 Belonging is the fuel: you go fast alone, far together — re-ignited when your energy runs low 30:19 Autonomy is the boost: deciding for yourself what to do — motivated even without pay 30:42 Self-igniting, flammable, fire-retardant — which type are you? 32:05 For the flammable type: when opportunity comes, just say "Yes" first III. Find Your Own Rhythm: Just Do It First35:51 Don't preset the outcome: step out the door and wander a bit, and new experiences show up 37:27 Find your own rhythm — not everyone needs to be a workaholic 39:16 Steady positive feedback matters a lot — first, you have to see yourself 45:39 The desire to win isn't a bad thing — it actually shows you clearly know what you want 52:38 Wrap-up: just do it first, see yourself, and possess an endless wellspring of internal drive Key ConceptsSelf-igniting / Flammable / Fire-retardant Personality: The self-igniting type can light themselves up on their own; the flammable type needs someone to give them a push and a bit of energy before they'll burn; the fire-retardant type not only won't burn themselves, but also douses those who want to. Imposter Syndrome: Already excellent and recognized by the outside world, yet inwardly feeling like an impostor who doesn't believe they deserve those achievements. Essentially a form of underestimating oneself. The Shining-ball and Treasure-chest Metaphor: Every achievement you earn is like gaining a shining ball — you drop it into the chest, close the lid, and return to ordinary life. Many people stay busy hunting for new balls but rarely open the chest to see how much they already have. Expression Muscles: Public expression and leadership are like muscles — everyone is born with them, but they need exercise. Teenagers lack a platform to practice, so the club lets them go to the "gym" and work their "expression muscles" every week. The Four Sources of Internal Drive: Autonomy (deciding for yourself what to do), Sense of Meaning (the thing matters to you), Competence (believing you've got this), Belonging (finding your place among like-minded people). Related BooksHōkō (《干法》 / "A Passion for Work") — Kazuo Inamori: A classic by Japanese entrepreneur Kazuo Inamori, summarizing over 70 years of work experience and expounding his philosophy of labor and work. Its core idea is "work as spiritual practice," emphasizing devotion to work as the path to character refinement and value. It describes the "self-igniting" and "flammable" personality types. Related EpisodesEP22 Recharging moments in an exhausting life — from starry seas to a cat's gaze EP7 Meeti

  5. Jul 28

    22.疲惫生活里的充能时刻：从星辰大海到小猫的对视

    每天被生活琐事填满，靠刷手机换来暂时性的快乐，却总觉得生活里少了什么——那种完全沉浸、被震撼到后脑勺发麻的时刻。我们把这叫做"巅峰时刻"。 不聊怎么消灭疲惫，而是聊怎么在疲惫里找到给你充电的高光瞬间。从大海、星空、沙漠夕阳，到NBA现场的集体欢腾；从画展上的天灵盖被冲开，到50层俯瞰19层办公室的视角转换；再到两本帮你复现巅峰体验的书——《当下的力量》和《敬畏之心》。 最终想和你说：巅峰时刻不是遥不可及的奢侈品，它就藏在你的"附近"——晚霞、蝉鸣、一只对视的猫、甚至摘下眼镜后看到的奶黄色光斑里。 关键是，你愿不愿意关掉脑子里嗡嗡作响的默认网络，真真切切地活在当下。 本期主播： 至卉：生活在中国，注册营养师兼创业公司产品经理，职业上靠研究食物谋生，生活中靠"用嘴表达"解压，持续探索生活与自我的可能性。ENFJ射手，激情高昂，内心柔软。 翠翠：生活在英国，工科博士在读，生活方式试验爱好者，从南京初创公司到北京大厂再到英格兰校园，像河一样流出自己的人生路径。INFJ白羊，平淡内敛，一身反骨。 时间轴 一、那些让我们后脑勺发麻的巅峰时刻00:05 疲惫生活里，什么是"巅峰时刻" 02:02 大海、尼斯湖、华山星空：自然带来的震撼与"活着的感觉" 05:50 美国沙漠夕阳：疲惫中突然被击中的辽阔感 08:04 NBA现场与世界杯酒吧：集体欢腾的能量与归属感 13:21 微醺逛艺术展：被画冲击到的"天灵盖被冲开" 二、换个视角和心态，两本书教你复现巅峰16:20 从50层俯瞰19层的办公室：烦恼变小了 19:41 墨水稀释比喻：扩大生活，痛苦就会被稀释 24:14 《当下的力量》：真实地感受当下，沉浸在附近和周遭 28:53 臣服于当下：掉进沼泽该怎么办 32:42 《敬畏之心》：8种奇迹与"默认神经网络"关闭 三、在日常"附近"找回巅峰体验37:59 站在真实的大地上去感受"附近"：晚霞、蝉鸣、抬头看天空 40:12 日常巅峰一：洗脸后探出窗，与隔壁花园的猫对视 41:28 日常巅峰二：摘下眼镜，看到不一样的新奇世界 45:14 状态好时做"充电清单"，状态差时照着做 46:33 接受人生起伏，随时拥有感知高光时刻的能力 提到的几个概念 默认神经网络（Default Mode Network）：大脑中不停嗡嗡自言自语、胡思乱想的神经回路。在身体极度疲惫或主动沉浸当下时会被"关掉"，是巅峰体验产生的神经科学基础。 臣服于当下：并非认命或放弃，而是不带评判地接受"我此刻就在这个状态里"的事实，然后以平静的心态采取行动。改变只能发生在当下。 敬畏（Awe）：面对宏大未知时产生的感觉，超越当前对世界的理解。会带来身体感受（后脑勺发麻、想哭），并让人意识到自身是比自身更宏大的事物的一部分。 生活的8种奇迹：《敬畏之心》一书中归纳的容易引发敬畏感的8类事件，包括自然的宏大、集体的欢腾、艺术与音乐、他人的故事等。 墨水稀释比喻：如果烦恼是一滴墨水，滴到水杯里和滴到海里效果完全不同。扩大生活体验、感受宏大，可以稀释日常的痛苦。 相关书籍 《当下的力量》 《敬畏之心》 往期相关单集 EP3.满世界到处跑，我用出走旅行深度养育自我 置顶图片扫码，解锁更多【养自己啊】深度内容 💬 粉丝群 | 节目更新，聊天交流，分享你的"养自己"瞬间 📖 公众号 | 未讲完的故事，主播专栏，文字版陪伴 Every day, filled with life's endless errands, chasing momentary joy through phone-scrolling — yet something always feels missing. That kind of complete immersion, that moment of being so moved the back of your scalp tingles. We call these "peak moments." This episode isn't about eliminating exhaustion. It's about finding the high-voltage moments that recharge you right in the middle of it. From oceans, starry skies, and desert sunsets, to the collective euphoria of an NBA game live; from having your mind blown at an art exhibition, to the perspective shift of looking down from the 50th floor at your 19th-floor office; and two books that help you recreate peak experiences — The Power of Now and Awe. Ultimately, we want to tell you: peak moments aren't some unattainable luxury. They're hidden in your "nearby" — in sunset glows, cicada songs, a cat locking eyes with you, even in the creamy-yellow light spots you see when you take off your glasses. The question is: are you willing to switch off the default mode network buzzing away in your brain, and truly, fully, live in the present? Hosts: Molly: Based in China, registered dietitian and product manager at a startup. Makes a living studying food, decompresses by "expressing everything out loud," and continuously explores the possibilities of life and self. ENFJ Sagittarius — high-energy, soft-hearted. Kathy: Based in the UK, engineering PhD candidate, lifestyle experiment enthusiast. From a Nanjing startup to a Beijing tech giant to an English campus, she's flowed like a river to carve out her own path. INFJ Aries — understated, with a rebellious core. Timeline I. Those Peak Moments That Make the Back of Your Scalp Tingle 00:05 Topic intro: What are "peak moments" in an exhausting life? 02:02 Oceans, Loch Ness, and starry skies at Mount Hua: nature's awe and the feeling of "being alive" 05:50 Desert sunset in America: struck by vastness in the midst of exhaustion 08:04 NBA live & World Cup at a pub: the energy and belonging of collective euphoria 13:21 Tipsy at an art exhibition: having your mind blown by paintings II. A New Perspective on Worries, and Two Books to Help You Recreate Peak Experiences 16:20 Looking down from the 50th floor at your 19th-floor office: problems shrink 19:41 The ink-dilution metaphor: expand your life to dilute the pain 24:14 The Power of Now: eating overnight oats by the river, fully present, discovering oleander 28:53 Surrendering to the present: what to do when you fall into a swamp 32:24 Awe: the 8 wonders of life and shutting off the "default mode network" III. Finding Peak Experiences in Your Everyday "Nearby" 37:59 Step outside and feel the "nearby": sunsets, cicadas, looking up at the sky 40:12 Everyday peak #1: leaning out the window after washing your face, locking eyes with a cat 41:28 Everyday peak #2: taking off your glasses and seeing creamy-yellow, diamond-like spots of light 45:14 Build a "recharge list" when you're doing well; follow it when you're not 46:33 Wrap-up: accept life's ups and downs, and always keep the ability to perceive peak moments Key Concepts Mentioned Default Mode Network: The neural circuit in the brain that constantly buzzes with self-talk and wandering thoughts. It gets "switched off" during extreme physical exhaustion or when actively immersing in the present — the neurological basis for peak experiences. Surrendering to the Present: Not resignation or giving up, but accepting without judgment the fact that "I am in this state right now," then taking action with a calm mind. Change can only happen in the present moment. Awe: The feeling when facing something vast and unknown that transcends your current understanding of the world. It brings physical sensations (scalp tingling, urge to cry) and makes you realize you're part of something larger than yourself. The 8 Wonders of Life: Eight categories of events identified in Awe that tend to trigger awe, including moral beauty/nature's vastness, collective effervescence, art and music, and others' stories. The Ink-Dilution Metaphor: If your worries are a drop of ink, dropping it into a cup versus into the ocean makes all the difference. Expanding your life experiences and sensing vastness can dilute everyday pain. Related Books The Power of Now, Awe Related Episodes EP3. Roaming the World: How I Deeply Nurture Myself Through Travel Scan the QR code to unlock more in-depth content 💬 Fan Group | Episode updates, chat, share your "nurturing yourself" moments 📖 Official Account | Untold stories, host columns, written companionship 在小宇宙查看该单集文稿

  6. Jul 14

    21.独立女性的财务安全感：一边取悦自己，一边为未来兜底

    一边想花钱取悦自己，一边又焦虑养老、大病风险，哪怕坚持存钱，内心依旧没有踏实的安全感？ 作为单身女青年，我们独自打拼、父母渐渐老去，身后无人可以托底，在 “及时行乐” 和 “拼命存钱” 之间反复拉扯，心里还总认定，银行卡里必须达到某个夸张的数字才算拥有安全感。 这期邀请《对账时间》主播毛毛，一个保险经纪人，从花钱不眨眼到系统性财务管理，给自己规划好了未来保障的独立女性，一起聊聊我们如何搭建财务安全系统的话题。 毛毛曾拥有十几年稳定恋情，30多岁分手后才被迫独自扛起房租、医疗、养老所有现实开销；而至卉早早明白只能靠自己，3直到30 岁开始主动摸索财务保障的方法和工具。 我们抛开枯燥理财公式、不推销复杂产品，只用两段真实女生人生，拆解普通人对保险、存钱的全部误解，分享不用压抑欲望的极简管钱办法。 最终想和你说：真正的自我养育，从来不是逼自己攒巨款，而是拥有既能好好取悦当下，也能稳稳守护未来的底气。 本期主播： 至卉：生活在中国，注册营养师兼创业公司产品经理，职业上靠研究食物谋生，生活中靠“用嘴表达”解压，持续探索生活与自我的可能性。ENFJ射手，激情高昂，内心柔软。 本期嘉宾： 毛毛：《对账时间》主播，坐标南京的保险经纪人，独立女性，演讲高手，可盐可甜 时间轴 一、作为单身女性，我们共有的金钱焦虑02:30 养老焦虑：我老了能住进豪华养老院吗？ 04:28 花钱一时爽，花完又后悔，我怎么还是钱不够多？ 05:44 要存300万才能过得舒坦？现金流比现金量更重要 二、觉醒时刻，我们终于明白什么是未来保障10:33 毛毛的人生转折点：16 年恋情结束，被迫直面独自生存的所有压力 13:29 至卉的觉醒：30 岁读懂风险，主动配置基础保障 15:54 破除三大保障误区：有钱了才考虑、买保险是纯消费、买了也用不上 19:20 用现在的小额开支，撬动未来更大的保障 24:47 我们还年轻，要从现在就考虑养老的事儿吗？ 三、零基础小白照抄：从0搭建财务安全系统32:26 存钱与活在当下两者兼得，认真对待钱，钱就认真对待你 34:00 分账户管理实操：毛毛精细分法 VS 小白极简分法 42:38 做预算还是记账？对金钱的事前VS事后管理 46:14 高风险投资要谨慎，也别压抑自己的好奇心 四、安全感的终极来源不止金钱54:20 安全感不是金钱本身，而是相信自己有能力保障未来 56:20 给新手的终极建议：先配齐基础医疗意外险，稳稳打好保障地基 提到的几个概念 损失厌恶：失去一笔钱的难受程度，远大于赚到同等金额的开心，花钱买保险会触发的损失感。 现金价值：长期保险逐年累积的保单自有资金，退保可取出，兼具储蓄与保障属性。 保险杠杆：每年少量保费，就能撬动几十万医疗、收入补偿的高额保障额度。 往期相关单集 EP10.买口红X买课：两种消费观的碰撞 EP11.富足是感受：从匮乏到滋养，聊聊我们和金钱的关系 置顶图片扫码，解锁更多【养自己啊】深度内容 💬 粉丝群 | 节目更新，聊天交流，分享你的“养自己”瞬间 📖 公众号 | 未讲完的故事，主播专栏，文字版陪伴 Ever caught yourself torn between splurging on little joys and panicking about retirement and medical bills? Even with consistent savings, you never quite feel financially secure. As young single women out here building our careers while our parents grow older, we have no family safety net to fall back on. We swing back and forth between living in the moment and hoarding every penny, convinced we need a massive six-figure bank balance to feel stable. In this chat, I sit down with Maomao, host of Balancing the Books and a professional insurance broker. Once a carefree spender, she’s built a structured money system to secure her future. We share two very different personal journeys, break down common misconceptions around savings and insurance, and share zero-restraint budgeting tactics with no complex formulas or pushy product sales. At the end of the day, self-care through money management isn’t about forcing yourself to hoard huge sums. It’s about building the confidence to treat yourself well today while safeguarding tomorrow. Host: ZhihuiA registered dietitian and product lead at a startup based in China. An ENFJ Sagittarius who’s passionate yet soft-hearted, she unpacks life’s possibilities through conversation and food research. Guest: Tiki MaoHost of Balancing the Books, an insurance broker based in Nanjing, and a versatile, independent public speaker. TimestampsPart 1: Shared Money Anxiety for Single Women02:30 The retirement worry: Can I afford a premium senior living community? 04:28 Instant gratification followed by guilt — why do I never feel like I have enough cash? 05:44 Savings balance vs steady cash flow: The latter brings real peace of mind Part 2: Our Wake-Up Calls — What Real Security Looks Like10:33 Maomao’s turning point: Ending a 16-year relationship forced her to cover rent, healthcare and retirement alone 13:29 Zhihui’s realization: I started planning for protection at 30 15:54 Three widespread insurance myths debunked 19:20 How small regular premiums unlock massive future coverage 24:47 Is retirement planning necessary when we’re still young? Part 3: Beginner-Friendly Financial Blueprint Anyone Can Copy32:26 Saving and enjoying life don’t have to be mutually exclusive; respect your money, and it’ll respect you back 34:00 Two budget split methods: Maomao’s detailed system vs simplified beginner version 42:38 Budgeting in advance vs tracking spending after the fact 46:14 High-risk investing: Proceed with caution, and don’t suppress your natural curiosity Part 4: Security Comes From More Than Cash54:20 True financial peace isn’t the money itself — it’s trust in your ability to provide for your later self 56:20 Core beginner tip: Start with affordable accident & medical insurance to lay your safety foundation Key Terminology ExplainedLoss Aversion: The pain of losing money outweighs the joy of gaining the same amount, which stops many people from buying insurance. Cash Value: Accumulated funds within permanent insurance policies that you can withdraw upon surrender, combining savings and coverage. Insurance Leverage: Pay modest annual premiums to access large sums of coverage for medical costs or lost income. Related Past EpisodesEP10 Lipstick vs Online Courses: Two Conflicting Views on Consumption EP11 Abundance Is a Feeling: Scarcity Mindset & Our Relationship With Money Extra ResourcesScan the QR code on the top pinned graphic for exclusive deep content from our show 💬 Fan Community: New episode alerts, casual chats, share your self-care wins 📖 Official Newsletter: Extended stories, host columns, written episode breakdowns 在小宇宙查看该单集文稿

  7. Jul 2

    20.梦中情房 | 不是豪宅，是安全舒适、有秩序的自我养育空间

    房子是生活的容器，是自我养育的花盆，我们都有自己喜欢的那一款，暂时拥有不了的时候，先松松土、加点营养液、把它挪到有阳光的地方，就已经很好了。 这一期，我们从住过的房子聊起。住过免费豪宅，也蜗居在快捷酒店。被北京看每都楼都是金钱符号、到英国终于租下一整个house。我们心里逐渐有了那个"梦中情房"的模样。 我们要的好像从来不是那套房子，而是住在里面那个舒服、妥帖、慢慢长开的自己。愿这一期，能让此刻正住在一个还不太满意的地方的你，松一口气。 不用急着搬家，为了房子背上太多压力，而是先从换一盏灯、擦一擦那件落了灰的置物架开始，慢慢画出属于自己的梦中情房蓝图。 本期主播： 至卉：生活在中国，注册营养师兼创业公司产品经理，职业上靠研究食物谋生，生活中靠“用嘴表达”解压，持续探索生活与自我的可能性。ENFJ射手，激情高昂，内心柔软。 翠翠：生活在英国，工科博士在读，生活方式试验爱好者，从南京初创公司到北京大厂再到英格兰校园，像河一样流出自己的人生路径。INFJ白羊，平淡内敛，一身反骨。 时间轴Part 1　从小城的免费豪宅，到整租英国house：我们的住房编年史 00:00我们的居住空间也是自我养育里很重要的一部分 01:11 至卉的迁徙：毕业免费豪宅→上海蜗居快捷酒店→回家与爸妈生活→精致单身公寓 04:45 翠翠的迁徙：跟爸妈住的便利生活→北漂被房租吓呆→英国租下一整个house Part 2　承受度是会被撑大的：租房选择与心理成长 09:27 合租大 house 的奔溃瞬间——公用洗衣机的异味恶心到我 11:51 为了说服自己整租一个 house，认真写了一页纸的思想斗争 13:00 租房的选择和心理成长互相塑造 15:21 明明有了大空间，却缩在小角落："我还不敢、不配使用更大的空间" 17:43 为住房花钱，花了再去挣就好——"省着省着，窟窿等着" Part 3　让房子越来越像自己：改造、养护，和一场百叶窗奇遇 18:40 工程师脑上线：把橱柜画成图纸，规划储物空间 21:48 从种子开始养的一屋子植物：牛油果、香料、能吃的菜，搭一个"可循环系统" 23:53 至卉的改造：测量、规划、分区，50平米样样俱全 26:11 划分区域，空间整洁，脑子好像也跟着整洁了 26:50 百叶窗奇遇：有些东西不是不好，只是缺乏养护，我们的脑子也一样 Part 4　我们要的从来不是那套房子，而是理想生活状态 34:40 至卉的梦中情房：大厨房、大阳台、江边与树荫 38:06 翠翠的蓝图：书房工作间、爱好角落、满屋植物，旁边一定要有电影院 42:00 房子的地段选择，通勤路上能看看小花，就已经足够美好 46:31 梦中情房，其实是想要一个"可以选择"生活圈的机会 48:07 不一定非要买房，实现理想生活状态有很多途径，因地制宜 55:22 房子是养育我们的花盆：挪不动就先松松土、挪到阳光下 本期提到的 王德峰 讲《道德经》——"人法地"，因地制宜地安排自己的生活 神秀偈"时时勤拂拭，莫使惹尘埃"（《六祖坛经》） 往期相关单集 19.野心 | 按自己的意愿过一生，从大胆说出“我想要”开始 17.以人为镜 | 从魅力男性身上，认出自己想长成的形状 05.一个人生活，喜忧参半的自我养育加速器 置顶图片扫码，解锁更多【养自己啊】深度内容 💬 粉丝群 | 节目更新，聊天交流，分享你的“养自己”瞬间 📖 公众号 | 未讲完的故事，主播专栏，文字版陪伴 About This Episode This episode starts with the places we've actually lived — the five-room company flat in Zhenjiang that Zhihui had entirely to herself, the Beijing stretch when every apartment block started looking like a stack of banknotes, the empty rooms Cuicui didn't dare set foot in while flat-sharing in the UK — and works its way toward what our "dream home" really looks like. Somewhere in the talking, we realised: what we're after was never the house itself, but the version of ourselves who gets to live inside it — comfortable, settled, slowly unfurling. The house is our plant pot. When you can't move it, loosening the soil, adding a little feed, and nudging it toward the light are already plenty. May this episode let you — if you're living somewhere that doesn't quite fit right now — breathe out a little. There's no rush to move. Start by changing one lamp, or wiping the dust off that one thing. Your Hosts Zhihui: Lives in China. A registered dietitian and product manager at a startup — she makes her living studying food, and unwinds by "expressing herself through her mouth" (eating and talking, in roughly equal measure), forever exploring what life and the self can become. ENFJ Sagittarius: bright and high-spirited on the outside, soft underneath. Cuicui: Lives in the UK. An engineering PhD candidate and lifestyle-experiment enthusiast — from a Nanjing startup to a Beijing tech giant to a campus in England, she's carved out her own path the way a river finds its course. INFJ Aries: quiet and understated on the surface, with a stubborn streak of rebellion. Timestamps Part 1 From a Free Luxury Apartment in a Small Town to Renting an Entire UK House: Our Housing Chronicle00:00 Our living space is also a vital part of self-nurturing. 01:11 Zhihui’s residential journey: Free luxury apartment after graduation → Cramped budget hotel in Shanghai → Living with parents back home → Exquisite single apartment 04:45 Cuicui’s residential journey: Convenient life living with parents → Shocked by Beijing’s rental prices as a migrant worker in the capital → Renting an entire house in the UK Part 2 Resilience Grows With Experience: Rental Housing and Personal Growth09:27 Breakdown moment of sharing a large house: The unpleasant odor from the shared washing machine made me sick. 11:51 I wrote a full page of self-persuasion to resolve my inner struggle before deciding to rent an entire house alone. 13:00 Our choices in housing and our mental growth shape each other mutually. 15:21 Even with a spacious living space, I still huddle in a tiny corner — I still feel unworthy and hesitant to embrace a bigger space. 17:43 It’s okay to spend money on housing; we can always earn it back. Saving excessively only leaves us with unforeseen losses. Part 3 Make a House a Home: Renovation, Maintenance and a Serendipity with Blinds18:40 Engineering mindset kicked in: I drew blueprints for cabinets to plan the storage space rationally. 21:48 A house full of plants grown from seeds: avocados, herbs and edible greens, building a self-sustaining mini ecological cycle. 23:53 Zhihui’s home renovation: Precise measurement, overall planning and functional zoning, making a 50-square-meter space fully equipped for all needs. 26:11 Zoning the space keeps the room tidy, and my mind feels organized too. 26:50 A serendipity with blinds: Nothing is inherently flawed; most things just lack proper maintenance — and the same goes for our minds. Part 4 What We Truly Desire Is Never a House, but an Ideal Lifestyle34:40 Zhihui’s dream home: A spacious kitchen, a large balcony, overlooking riverside scenery and lush shade trees. 38:06 Cuicui’s ideal living blueprint: A study and workspace, dedicated hobby corners, rooms filled with plants, and a cinema nearby. 42:00 When choosing a house location, a commute with glimpses of blooming flowers is enough to bring warmth and joy. 46:31 A dream home essentially means having the freedom to choose your own social and living circle. 48:08 Buying a house is not a must. There are various ways to achieve an ideal life, and we should adjust measures to local conditions. 55:22 A house is like a flower pot that nurtures us. If you cannot move it temporarily, loosen the soil and move it to the sunlight first. Mentioned in This Episode Wang Defeng's lectures on the Tao Te Ching — "man follows the earth", arranging your life to suit where you are The Chan (Zen) verse "polish it constantly, let no dust settle" (Platform Sutra) Related Episodes Ambition | Living life on your own terms starts with daring to say "I want this" People as Mirrors | Through charismatic men, recognising the shape we quietly want to grow into Living Alone: a bittersweet accelerator for nurturing yourself 在小宇宙查看该单集文稿

    20.梦中情房 | 不是豪宅，是安全舒适、有秩序的自我养育空间

  8. Jun 16

    19.野心 | 按自己的意愿过一生，从大胆说出“我想要”开始

    不聊怎么把野心做大，说说我们怎么从"不敢要"，一点点学着把"我想要"说出口。 从小被夸"听话""懂事"，连出去玩都不好意思说想去哪；写得最好的演讲稿被让给了别人，活儿干完了也不敢承认是自己做的——这些我们太熟了。 野心这个词听起来张牙舞爪，可它也可以很具体、很温柔：是一套江边的房子，是想给世界留下一丢丢痕迹，是允许自己挣到钱，也是终于敢报一个配得上自己的价。 在我们实现野心的路上，走着走着，焦虑反而散了——原来不一定要冲到终点才算数，路是一点点走清楚的，过程中也有风景。 愿这一期能让你松一口气：野心不必慌张，它可以是远处的一颗北极星，也可以是此刻脚边刚刚开的一朵小花。 本期主播： 至卉：生活在中国，注册营养师兼创业公司产品经理，职业上靠研究食物谋生，生活中靠“用嘴表达”解压，持续探索生活与自我的可能性。ENFJ射手，激情高昂，内心柔软。 翠翠：生活在英国，工科博士在读，生活方式试验爱好者，从南京初创公司到北京大厂再到英格兰校园，像河一样流出自己的人生路径。INFJ白羊，平淡内敛，一身反骨。 时间轴Part 1 敢不敢要：野心的地基 00:00 今天，我们想聊聊"野心"这个有点带劲的话题 00:44 至卉：成长里我们很少被鼓励，大胆说出自己的野心 01:07 翠翠：从小被要求听话，出去玩也总在妥协自己的需求 02:08 敢不敢要，才是最底层的事——小事都不敢提，野心更别谈 02:37 至卉：小学演讲，我写了最好的稿子，却被让给了别人 04:04 翠翠：研究助理的活儿干完了95%，却不敢说是我做的 05:02 孔融让梨、树大招风、枪打出头鸟 Part 2 世俗的野心与安全感 05:31 至卉：你内心最大的渴望，到底是什么？ 05:56 提到野心，第一反应总是世俗的：年薪百万、大房子 06:28 翠翠：我能解决多大的问题，就能带来多大的财富 07:21 至卉的梦中情房：40岁，住进江边那个新贵片区 09:11 翠翠一个"不太稳妥"的价值观：先把想花的钱花出去，再去找 10:11 瑞士那位"玩钱"的朋友：想露宿街头，还得主动努力 12:53 不必存满五年才敢享受；而且现在，谁还会饿死呢 13:40 至卉：我还真算过——算完发现"仍需努力" Part 3 两种驱动力：愿景与野心 14:19 翠翠：一本讲《驱动力》的书——人有两类驱动力 15:03 物质满足之后，使命、热爱、好奇心才慢慢长出来 15:55 三个支柱：自主、胜任、目的（翠翠还想加第四个：决定要自己做） 17:19 翠翠：我的野心是按自己的意愿过我的一生 17:26 愿景 vs 野心：野心就在眼前，愿景是远方的状态 19:51 这句话，其实是当年明月写在《明朝那些事儿》结尾的 20:44 读博算不算野心？更多是直觉 22:47 闯荡天地的驱动力，是想离开那个让我压抑的环境 Part 4 为了野心，我们做了什么 24:17 那就聊聊：为了这些野心，我们都做过什么 24:52 至卉更大的野心：改变一丢丢世界，留下一点痕迹 25:07 翠翠：这在哲学上，叫"存在主义焦虑" 25:57 做播客也有世俗的野心——希望有一天能接广告 28:06 700个粉就很开心了；想当年70个粉时，我们都要欢呼一下 28:47 有野心就去做，先做了再说 30:04 "敢"的两个层面：敢想，和敢做 30:28 至卉：稻盛和夫说"心想事成"，信念真的很重要 31:35 野心不是要拔着头发飞上天，而是努力垫一垫脚就够得着 Part 5 自信、配得感，和敢报高价 31:58 不同性格的野心长得不一样，具体务实VS冒险精神 33:12 翠翠的察觉：从前我好像"不太允许自己挣到钱" 34:09 打开一个心结，钱就流进来了 35:11 至卉：从金钱羞耻到敢报高价 36:54 挑环境也很重要：让那些打压我的人，离我的生活远一点 37:30 能力配不上野心时，焦虑就来了；把能力提上来，情绪也就散了 Part 6 一步一步，慢慢走也会到 37:50 至卉：从演讲台上那根被嘲笑的"木头"说起 38:31 至卉：公司品牌宣讲第一人，背后是一百多次的刻意练习 41:01 翠翠：完成博士也一样，能力和野心的差距慢慢缩小 43:01 刚上路时，地图前方一片雾，走近了，才看清脚下的下一步 45:05 如果能享受每个阶段，那整条路，都是繁花盛开的感觉 45:44 远处要有那颗北极星，脚下的风景，也是要看的 这期里提到的Daniel Pink《Drive》（驱动力）—— Type X / Type I；自主性 autonomy、胜任性 mastery、目的性 purpose 当年明月《明朝那些事儿》——「按照自己的意愿，去度过一生」 稻盛和夫 ——「心想事成」／强烈的念想 存在主义焦虑（想留下点什么） 英国 Researcher Development Framework（研究者能力的多维度拆解） 复现嘉宾 叶帆（水墨画家）—— 人在每个阶段，都有每个阶段的特质与享受 节目里提到的往期单集🎧 EP18 与焦虑共处 | 不是你不行，是你在走上坡路 置顶名片扫码 解锁更多【养自己啊】深度内容💬 粉丝群 | 节目更新，聊天交流，分享你的"养自己"瞬间 📖 公众号 | 未讲完的故事，主播专栏，文字版陪伴 Title: Ambition | A Star Ahead, Flowers at Your Feet Intro This episode is about ambition — not how to make yours bigger, but how the two of us, both rather bad at wanting things out loud, slowly learned to say "I want this." Praised as children for being "good" and "sensible", too shy even to say where we'd like to go on a trip; watching the best speech we ever wrote handed to someone else; finishing the work and not daring to admit it was ours — we know all of this far too well. And somewhere in the talking we found that ambition, for all its teeth, can be quite concrete and quite gentle too: a flat by the river, the wish to leave some small mark on the world, letting yourself earn money, finally daring to name a price that's actually worth your while. We also get into why, somewhere along the way, the anxiety quietly lifts — it turns out you don't have to sprint to the finish for it to count; the road grows clearer as you walk it, and flowers open underfoot. If you're somewhere on that climb, we hope this one lets you breathe out: ambition needn't be all rush — it can be a North Star far ahead, and a little flower that's just opened by your feet. Your hosts: Zhihui: Based in China. A registered dietitian and product manager at a start-up — she makes a living studying food, and unwinds by "talking it out", forever exploring the possibilities of life and self. ENFJ, Sagittarius; high-spirited, soft on the inside. Cuicui: Based in the UK. An engineering PhD candidate and devoted life-experiment enthusiast, flowing her own path like a river — from a Nanjing start-up, to a Beijing tech giant, to an English campus. INFJ, Aries; understated and reserved, with a rebel streak. Books Mentioned in This Episode Drive (Daniel Pink) Those Things of the Ming Dynasty (当年明月) Past Episodes Referenced 🎧 EP18 在小宇宙查看该单集文稿

    19.野心 | 按自己的意愿过一生，从大胆说出“我想要”开始
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养自己啊？问题不大！ 两位生活在地球两端的30+女性，用物质和精神食粮重新把自己养育一遍的生活方式实验。 自己当自己的父母，按自己的喜好和节奏，慢慢活成想要的样子。照顾好身体，安放好情绪，经营好关系，慢慢长成自己——陪你在养育自己的路上走得温暖一点。 每四周更新，不定期加餐，欢迎常来坐坐。 Nurturing Yourself? No Big Deal! Two women in their thirties living on opposite ends of the earth, experimenting with ways to re-nurture themselves through nourishment for both body and soul. New episodes every four weeks. Drop by whenever you like.

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  • Creator
    营养师至卉Molly
  • Years Active
    2025 - 2026
  • Episodes
    26
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © 营养师至卉Molly@小宇宙App
  • Show Website
    养自己啊