Hold the Line At Home

Chelsi McFadden
  • 5.0 (2)
  • Self-Improvement
  • Updated Weekly

Fire family life is beautiful, inconvenient, funny, lonely, and deeply misunderstood. Hold the Line at Home is where we talk about marriage, motherhood, fire season, re-entry after shift, long assignments, mental load, and the parts of loving a first responder that people don’t always say out loud. For fire wives, firefighter spouses, first responder families, and anyone building a life around the job.

  1. May 19

    How to Stop Absorbing Your Partner’s Mood

    What happens when one bad shift changes the energy of the entire house? In this episode, Chelsi sits down with Shannon Mead of Stack of Stones to talk about mood management, emotional mirroring, compartmentalization, and the pressure many first responder families feel to keep the peace when their partner comes home exhausted, overstimulated, or carrying the weight of the job. They talk about what it looks like to stop absorbing someone else’s emotional state, how fiery families accidentally build entire routines around managing moods, and why “connection over happiness” may be a healthier goal during stressful seasons of life. This conversation also dives into: re-entry after long shifts and assignmentscommunication systems that actually helpresentment and emotional overloadWhy compartmentalization helps on the job but can create distance at homeunrealistic expectations around marriage, motherhood, and “having it all together”fire season preparation and nervous system overloadlearning how to reconnect without walking on eggshells If you’ve ever found yourself adjusting the entire household based on your partner’s mood, this episode is for you. FOLLOW SHANNON: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/stack.of.stones/ Website: https://www.stackofstones.com/ MEDIA MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE Conversation Academy: https://www.stackofstones.com/conversation-academy Kate Bowler: https://www.instagram.com/katecbowler/

    37 min

  2. May 11

    Mental Health Awareness Is Not A Plan with James Boomhower

    Mental Health Awareness Month cannot stop at a green ribbon. In this episode of Hold the Line at Home, I’m joined by James Boomhower of Stay Fit 4 Duty. James is a paramedic with over 20 years of experience, a peer support and crisis intervention specialist, and a licensed mental health counseling associate based in Massachusetts and Rhode Island. Together, we talk about what mental health support actually looks like for first responders and the families holding things together at home.   We cover relationship action plans, low capacity days, crew culture, alcohol culture, resentment, communication after shift, and how to make a real plan for the moments when home or work feels sideways. This episode is for the fire families, EMS families, and first responder couples who know awareness matters, but need more than awareness to get through real life. Connect with James: stayfitforduty.org and @stay_fit4duty on social media.

    40 min

  3. Mar 17

    Why Therapy Dogs Matter for First Responders with Adrienne (Mayzie's handler and mom)

    First responders carry a lot that most people never see. Long shifts, traumatic calls, missed time with family, and emotional weight that doesn’t just disappear when the shift ends. In this episode, I’m talking with Adrienne, a former EMT and hospital transfer coordinator, about the loneliness, burnout, and emotional toll that can come with first responder work and how therapy dogs are creating small but meaningful moments of relief. We talk about dispatch life, EMS culture, understaffing, emotional exhaustion, and the work Adrienne now does with Maisie through First Responder Therapy Dogs. If you care about first responder mental health, therapy dogs, EMS burnout, or the hidden cost of serving others, this conversation is worth hearing. Learn More: First Responder Therapy Dogs Meet Mayzie the Kelpie

    49 min

  4. Mar 9

    The Hidden Trauma of First Responder Families | Vicarious Trauma Explained

    First responder families often carry more than most people realize. In this episode, Chelsi and her oldest child Echo McFadden discuss vicarious trauma and secondary trauma within first responder families, a topic Echo has been researching as part of her university studies. They explore what happens when the emotional weight of emergency service work comes home, even when the details of the calls never get shared. The conversation covers: • How first responder spouses absorb stress from the job • The invisible mental load carried at home • Hypervigilance and emotional anticipation during fire season • Communication strategies that help transitions from shift to home • Why capacity and boundaries matter in first responder marriages • The importance of culturally competent mental health support They also share the practical systems their own family developed over the years to navigate fire service life—from daily check-ins during shifts to simplifying life when stress levels are high. Whether you are a firefighter spouse, a partner of a police officer, or part of any first responder family, this conversation puts language to experiences many families quietly carry. Resources: Resources:https://journals.plos.org/plosone/article?id=10.1371/journal.pone.0269659doi.org/10.15270/53-4-593https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/20008198.2018.1562840https://ovc.ojp.gov/sites/g/files/xyckuh226/files/media/document/vt_intro_to_vt_for_fire_services-508.pdf

    49 min

  5. Mar 2

    First Responder Marriage: Police Wife & Fire Wife Talk Solo Parenting and Connection

    What does marriage really look like when you’re married to a police officer or wildland firefighter? In this episode, Chelsi sits down with Kristin from Heels and Holster to talk about solo parenting, unpredictable schedules, resentment, communication, and rebuilding connection in first responder marriages. They discuss: Police wife and firefighter wife life Wildland fire season and forced overtime Feeling unseen in your marriage Why nightly phone calls matter Protecting your peace with boundaries Family dinner as a stabilizer Living far from where your spouse works Anxiety when your partner is on duty An honest conversation about what it takes to stay connected when the job pulls your spouse away. Connect with Kristin: Instagram: @heelsandholster Website: http://ww.heelsandholster.com

    50 min

  6. Feb 23

    Postpartum Anxiety in Firewife Life: Traumatic Birth, Shift Work & Surviving the First Year

    Postpartum anxiety is rarely discussed in firewife life but it’s real, and it’s common. In this episode, Kristen Hampson shares her experience navigating postpartum anxiety, traumatic birth, and early motherhood while married to a firefighter working 24-hour shifts. From being pregnant during the pandemic to experiencing intrusive thoughts after her first baby to surviving a C-section where a code was called on both her and her son, this conversation is raw and honest. We talk about the loneliness of nighttime anxiety when your spouse is on shift, the pressure to “hold it together,” the impact of firefighter schedules on postpartum mental health, and why having a therapist established before a crisis matters. We also discuss medication vs. natural support options, the importance of spouse peer support, and how to build a postpartum plan before baby arrives. If you’re a first responder spouse, a new mom in fire life, or someone supporting a firefighter family, this episode will remind you: you are not alone, and you are not failing. Motherhood is hard. Fire life adds another layer. And you can still get through it. Contact Kristen https://www.instagram.com/kleetz13/

    37 min

  7. Feb 16

    The Five Circles Ranch Approach To Healing For Frontline Workers

    In this conversation, Jake Shumate discusses the mission and vision behind Five Circles Ranch, a holistic healing program designed for frontline workers, particularly firefighters. He shares his personal journey of trauma and healing, emphasizing the importance of addressing the mental, physical, relational, and spiritual aspects of health. The discussion highlights the unique challenges faced by first responders, the impact of trauma on their lives, and the need for community support and holistic approaches to wellness. Jake also elaborates on the experiential learning opportunities provided at the ranch, including equine therapy and retreats, aimed at fostering resilience and connection among participants. Takeaways ​Five Circles Ranch focuses on holistic healing for frontline workers.​Trauma can be genetically inherited, affecting mental health.​First responders experience significantly more trauma than the average person.​Community and relationships are crucial for emotional well-being.​Spirituality plays a significant role in coping with trauma.​Awareness and appreciation for first responders can make a difference.​Change requires commitment and willingness to engage in the healing process. Learn more and donate to Five Circles Ranch: https://www.5circlesranch.org/donate-now Chapters 00:00 Introduction to Five Circles Ranch 01:56 The Journey to Establishing Five Circles Ranch 06:03 Understanding Trauma in First Responders 07:06 The Impact of Trauma on Relationships 09:42 The Importance of Holistic Healing 14:41 The Need for Support Systems 20:13 Challenges in the Fire Service 22:41 The Reality Behind the Firefighter's Life 27:30 The Importance of Mental Health in First Responders 33:37 Five Circles: A Holistic Approach to Healing 39:04 Creating Sustainable Change in the Fire Service 45:08 Building Community and Support for First Responders

    50 min

  8. Feb 9

    What Growing Up as a Police Officer’s Child Teaches About Raising Kids in a Firefighter Family

    What does growing up as a police officer’s child teach you about raising kids in a firefighter family? In this episode, Chelsi talks with Erin Reed, a fire wife and working mom who grew up in a law enforcement household. They explore how first responder culture shapes childhood, what changes when you become the spouse instead of the child, and how to raise kids inside nontraditional schedules. From 24-hour shifts and default parenting to pride, resilience, and the reality of invisible labor, this episode offers an honest look at generational first responder family life. For firefighter spouses, fire families, and anyone navigating marriage and parenthood inside public service. Erin's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/erinareed/

    50 min
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out of 5
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About

Fire family life is beautiful, inconvenient, funny, lonely, and deeply misunderstood. Hold the Line at Home is where we talk about marriage, motherhood, fire season, re-entry after shift, long assignments, mental load, and the parts of loving a first responder that people don’t always say out loud. For fire wives, firefighter spouses, first responder families, and anyone building a life around the job.

Information

  • Creator
    Chelsi McFadden
  • Years Active
    2025 - 2026
  • Episodes
    26
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © Chelsi McFadden
  • Show Website
    Hold the Line At Home

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