The Choose Yourself Channel

Hakeem Bourne Mcfarlane
  • 5.0 (4)
  • Self-Improvement

Hosted by Hakeem Bourne McFarlane, author of Choose Yourself to Be Chosen and founder of the Choose Yourself Community (CYC). Welcome to The Choose Yourself Channel : where personal growth gets real, faith gets practical, and healing comes with humor. This isn't your average self-help talk. It’s the CYC-GYM - where we flex the dorsal cortex, roast our old habits, and build foundations stronger than our excuses through accountability and innercise. We talk discipline, desire, detoxing from dysfunction, and designing a life that actually feels good based on balance ... from cold showers to calling yourself out. One episode might sound like therapy, another like stand-up, and the next like church with better playlists and preachers. Here, we don’t fake peace for followers. We face our triggers, evaluate our environments, and invest in our evolution. Because choosing yourself isn’t just a slogan ... it’s the daily sport of self-respect! 🐬 Expect truth. Expect laughter. Expect to be uncomfortable - in the best way. Join the movement every Tuesday at 10 a.m. with the Choose Yourself Community on zoom to meet other self choosers virtually hosted by Hakeem. This is The Choose Yourself Channel. Raw. Relatable. Real as growth gets.

  1. 15h ago

    🌠 Sara Byram - The Goal Line vs. The Soul Line

    Who were you before the world started telling you who to be? In this episode of the Choose Yourself Channel, Sara Byram, spiritual teacher and energetic astrologist, joins us for a deep conversation about divine identity, spirituality, astrology, childhood conditioning, boundaries, self-worth, relationships, and the process of discovering who you are underneath years of programming. Sara shares her experience growing up in a strict Catholic household with a military father, navigating trauma and fear, and eventually experiencing what she describes as a spiritual awakening in 2019. That moment sent her searching through spirituality, astrology, human design, spiritual principles, and other modalities as she began questioning what she had been taught about God, love, relationships, and herself. But this conversation isn't about allowing astrology - or any belief system - to make your choices for you. We explore the danger of becoming dependent on external tools and why spirituality, religion, books, teachers, and astrology can provide information while you still have the responsibility to participate in your own life. Takeaways ⬇️ Childhood conditioning can create an identity that adulthood eventually asks us to question.Boundaries don't just keep people out.. they show people how to have a relationship with the person you're becoming.Astrology can be used as a tool for reflection without surrendering your free will to predictions or external circumstances.Self-worth isn't something money, relationships, achievements, or validation can permanently give you.Growth sometimes creates a “cocoon phase” where you're too grown for some old relationships but haven't found your new community yet.The goal line represents the things you want; the soul line represents the identity capable of receiving and sustaining them.Knowledge can create awareness, but wisdom requires actually embodying what you've learned.“Always remember that you are worthy and there's nothing external that can change that.” - Sara Byram 🔮 Connect With Sara Byrum Instagram & TikTok: @sbreeziii @celestialbridgeastrology https://www.instagram.com/celestialbridgeastrology/ Connect with Sara to learn more about her readings, spiritual work, and how she uses astrology as a tool for deeper self-awareness. 🐬 Grow With Us ⬇️ 🐬 CYC Zoom (Tuesdays 10 a.m.) 🏝️ Annual CYC Retreat 📖 Choose Yourself to Be Chosen 🎙️ Choose Yourself Channel

    🌠 Sara Byram - The Goal Line vs. The Soul Line

  2. Aug 2

    💊 Kendenn - Your Protein Powder Can't Fix Childhood Trauma

    Heal Yourself Before You Try to Build Everything Else. Choose Yourself to be Chosen. Some people spend years trying to fix their finances, their relationships, or their careers… without ever asking if the real problem is the relationship they have with themselves. In this episode, we sit down with Kendenn, owner of Ultimate Nutrition Shop, coach, entrepreneur and bodybuilder.. for a powerful conversation about healing from the inside out. We unpack the connection between emotional health, gut health, sleep, hormones, stress, money, relationships, and the energy we bring into every area of life. Kendenn shares his journey through heartbreak, financial rock bottom, chronic pain, bodybuilding, and years of personal development that ultimately led him to realize something profound: you can have the physique, the discipline, and the habits but if you haven't healed your relationship with fear, you'll continue repeating the same cycles. This conversation explores the importance of choosing yourself first, understanding childhood conditioning, healing attachment styles, building foundational habits, and optimizing your health before chasing external success. We also dive into whole-food nutrition, gut health, supplementation, inflammation, and why investing in your body today is one of the greatest forms of preventative medicine. Takeaways ⬇️ Healing your relationship with yourself changes every other relationship.Fear keeps us stuck; faith and action move us forward.Your energy attracts what your mindset sustains.Sleep, stress, gut health, hormones, and inflammation all work together.Whole foods and simple habits outperform quick fixes over time.Choosing yourself isn't selfish—it's the foundation for contribution.At some point, we all have to stop asking... "Why does this keep happening to me?" ...and start asking... "What inside of me keeps creating the same outcome?" Transformation doesn't begin when your circumstances change.... It begins the moment you become willing to change the person creating them. "You can't heal the future while protecting the fears of your past." 🐬 Grow With Us ⬇️ 🐬 CYC Zoom (Tuesdays 10 a.m.) ❤️‍🩹 Gut Repair Solution 🏝️ Annual CYC Retreat 📖 Choose Yourself to Be Chosen

    💊 Kendenn - Your Protein Powder Can't Fix Childhood Trauma

  3. Jul 7

    🥇 Ryan Billian - The Goal Was Never the Gold Medal

    Authenticity Isn't Found, It's Revealed Some people spend their lives trying to become someone else… others realize the greatest transformation comes from uncovering who they already are. In this episode, we sit down with Ryan Billion - Olympic hopeful, performance coach, former Division I athlete, and mindset mentor - for a powerful conversation about identity, discipline, self-belief, and what it truly means to choose yourself. From navigating life after collegiate athletics to rebuilding his identity beyond sport, Ryan shares how chasing an Olympic dream taught him that success isn't found in medals or milestones... it's found in the person you're becoming along the way. We dive into purpose, authenticity, boundaries, visualization, self-awareness, addiction, and why the strongest relationships are built after you learn to build one with yourself. This episode explores the difference between external achievement and internal fulfillment, reminding us that confidence isn't something you're born with... it's something you earn every time you keep a promise to yourself. Takeaways ⬇️ Identity is built through daily commitments, not titles or achievementsSelf-belief grows every time you follow through on your wordAuthenticity is embracing every part of yourself—not just the comfortable partsYour environment quietly shapes your future through daily osmosisReplace destructive addictions with purposeful onesVisualization prepares the mind before performance prepares the bodyBoundaries create space for purpose to growAt some point, we all have to stop asking... "Who am I supposed to become?" ...and start asking... "Who am I when nobody else is watching?" The life you're chasing isn't built by waiting for motivation. It's built through the quiet decisions you make every day when no one is keeping score. "The only path to happiness is through the triumph of your principles." 🐬 Grow With Us ⬇️ 🐬 CYC Zoom (Tuesdays 10 a.m.) ❤️‍🩹 Gut Repair Solution 🏝️ Annual CYC Retreat 📖 Choose Yourself to Be Chosen 🎙️ Choose Yourself Channel

    🥇 Ryan Billian - The Goal Was Never the Gold Medal

  4. Jun 19

    📻 Abby Murhpy - Delusional Enough to Try, Disciplined Enough to Build

    Some people spend their lives waiting for certainty… others take the risk before they have all the answers. In this episode, we sit down with Abby Murphy - radio personality, creator, storyteller, and host of The Breakup Breakdown - for a conversation about self-belief, creativity, relationships, purpose, and the courage to build something before you know how it will turn out. From chasing a career in the entertainment industry to moving cities, reinventing herself, and helping others share their stories, Abby opens up about the power of storytelling and why creation is one of the most meaningful forms of contribution. We dive into the difference between belief and delusion, the importance of trusting your intuition, and why some of the biggest opportunities in life require you to bet on yourself before you have proof that it will work. We also explore the lessons Abby has learned from interviewing hundreds of people about breakups and relationships. From self-worth and boundaries to knowing when to walk away, this conversation highlights how the relationship with yourself sets the standard for every other relationship in your life. Takeaways ⬇️ Sometimes growth starts with a little healthy delusion and a lot of actionCreativity is one of the highest forms of contributionYour intuition often knows the answer before your mind catches upSelf-worth determines what you tolerate in relationshipsGreat stories come from people willing to take risksConsistency matters more than inspirationAt some point, we all have to decide... Are we going to keep consuming other people's stories— or start creating our own? The life you want isn't built in a single moment. It's built through hundreds of ordinary days where you choose to keep showing up. "An overnight success usually takes ten years." 🐬 Grow With Us ⬇️ 🐬 CYC Zoom (Tuesdays 10 a.m.) ❤️‍🩹 Gut Repair Solution 🏝️ Annual CYC Retreat 📖 Choose Yourself to Be Chosen 🎙️ Choose Yourself Channel

    📻 Abby Murhpy - Delusional Enough to Try, Disciplined Enough to Build

  5. May 23

    🇮🇪 Caleb McDonnell - From Rugby to Real Estate to Rice Bowls

    You Are What You Consume - Food, Friends, Fear & Foundations Some people consume content all day and still wonder why they feel lost… others get curious, take action, and build an entirely different life from it. In this episode, we sit down with Caleb — “The Black Irish Realtor” — entrepreneur, food lover, athlete, realtor, and owner of Ideal Nutrition, for a hilarious and eye-opening conversation on identity, nutrition, business, culture, self-belief, and what it means to actually create a life instead of just consuming one. IG - @theblackirishrealtor From growing up mixed race in Ireland and struggling to fit in, to moving to America on a rugby scholarship with no blueprint, Caleb shares how curiosity, risk-taking, and staying authentic shaped his evolution. We dive into food quality differences between Europe and America, preservatives, health, entrepreneurship, and why most people are overcomplicating success instead of simply taking the next step. Between stories about selling perfume samples at school, working bars, selling cars, real estate, dogs taking over couches, and learning business from old Irish hustlers, this episode blends humor with real perspective on building resilience and multiple streams of income. This conversation is also a reminder that your environment matters. The people you surround yourself with, the food you consume, the content you watch, and the risks you’re willing to take all shape your future. Because choosing yourself isn’t just motivation—it’s learning how to create systems, routines, and opportunities that align with who you’re becoming. Takeaways ⬇️ Curiosity can become your career if you’re willing to act on itThe food we consume impacts far more than just weightYour environment either expands your thinking or limits itSimplicity and consistency beat overcomplicationTaking risks is necessary if you want a different lifeReal growth often starts when you leave your comfort zoneAt some point, we all have to decide… Are we going to keep consuming life passively or start creating something meaningful from what we’ve been given? Your story, your culture, your struggles, and your curiosity might be the exact ingredients needed to build your future. “Keep it simple. Start somewhere. Figure it out as you grow.” 🐬 Grow With Us ⬇️ 🐬 CYC Zoom (Tuesdays 10 a.m.) ❤️‍🩹 Gut Repair Solution 🏝️ Annual CYC Retreat 📖 Choose Yourself to Be Chosen 🎙️ Choose Yourself Channel

    🇮🇪 Caleb McDonnell - From Rugby to Real Estate to Rice Bowls

  6. May 14

    🧯 Joe Spector - Walking Through the Fire Without Becoming It

    Some people spend their whole life avoiding discomfort… others walk through the fire and learn how to become stronger because of it. In this episode, we sit down with Joe Spector - ex-firefighter, speaker, emotional resilience expert, husband, and father... for one of the deepest conversations yet on trauma, identity, grief, emotional regulation, and what it really means to choose yourself when life completely falls apart. From being a police officer and fire captain to losing his career after a traumatic brain injury, Joe opens up about the spiral that followed: financial stress, grief, loss, emotional shutdown, family tension, and ultimately reaching a breaking point that forced him to finally face himself. This episode dives into the dangerous illusion of “having it all together,” especially for men taught to suppress emotions instead of process them. We break down the parallels between firefighting and life itself - learning how to prepare for adversity, regulate your nervous system under pressure, and stop bleeding unhealed pain onto the people you love most. From breathwork and therapy to parenting, faith, and rebuilding identity after loss, this conversation is packed with wisdom, humor, truth, and practical perspective for anyone navigating hard seasons. Takeaways ⬇️ You can be successful on the outside and still be suffering internallyChoosing yourself is not selfish, it’s how you become dependable for othersEmotional regulation is a skill set, not a personality traitYour children don’t just need provision… they need presenceEverything you want in life is on the other side of your comfort zoneHealing starts when you stop avoiding what hurtsAt some point, life stops asking how productive you are… and starts asking how prepared you are internally when everything changes. Because adversity doesn’t build character out of nowhere, it reveals the foundation that was already there... and sometimes the strongest thing a person can do… is finally ask for help then back it up with acceptance and accountability. CONNECT WITH JOE “You can’t keep bleeding on people who didn’t cut you.” 🐬 Grow With Us ⬇️ 🐬 CYC Zoom (Tuesdays 10 a.m.) ❤️‍🩹 Order THREE GRS 🏝️ Annual CYC Retreat 📖 Choose Yourself to Be Chosen 🎙️ Choose Yourself Channel

    🧯 Joe Spector - Walking Through the Fire Without Becoming It

  7. May 2

    🍄 Thanecha - From the Projects to Purpose

    Some people think choosing yourself is ego… but it’s actually returning to the version of you that existed before the world started programming you. In this episode, we sit down with Thanecha - creator, coach, and community builder whose story started in survival mode: homelessness, instability, and navigating life without a clear foundation... but what makes this conversation powerful isn’t just where she came from… it’s how she chose to rewrite what was possible. From overcoming a poverty mindset to stepping into creativity through music, fitness, and community, this episode breaks down what it really means to stay curious, stay open, and build your identity through experience instead of expectation. We dive into spirituality, inner child healing, relationships, and the power of setting boundaries because growth isn’t just about doing more… it’s about becoming someone who no longer tolerates what once held them back. Takeaways ⬇️ Your environment may shape you, but it doesn’t have to limit youStaying curious is one of the most powerful tools for growthYou don’t need to know the full path—you need to take the next stepBoundaries are a sign of self-respect, not selfishnessHealing your inner child isn’t weakness—it’s responsibilityAt some point, we all reach a moment where we have to decide… Are we going to keep living from survival patterns or start creating from self-awareness? You’re not just your story… you’re what you choose to do with it. “You don’t need permission to become who you already are.” Grow With Us ⬇️ 🐬 CYC Zoom (Tuesdays 10 a.m.) ❤️‍🩹 Gut Repair Solution 🏝️ CYC annual Retreat (Sedona, AZ) 📖 Choose Yourself to Be Chosen 🎙️ Choose Yourself Channel

    🍄 Thanecha - From the Projects to Purpose

  8. Apr 23

    🐬 Amrita Singh - You Can Love Your Culture and Still Outgrow It

    Everybody wants to break generational patterns but not everybody is willing to admit they’re still a part of them. In this episode, we sit down with Amrita, founder of Body by Mia and a powerful self-chooser from the CYC, who shares her journey of growing up between cultures, battling identity, body image, and expectations—and ultimately choosing herself. From being told who she had to be… to realizing she didn’t even know who she was… this conversation dives into what it really takes to break free from conditioning, face your triggers, and build a life aligned with your truth. From emotional eating to extreme self-restriction, from seeking validation to driving across the country alone.. Amrita shows what it looks like to stop performing and start becoming. But the real power is that she didn’t do it alone. Through the Choose Yourself Community (CYC), she found accountability, support, and a space where growth is expected not optional. A community where being triggered isn’t an attack… it’s an invitation to evolve. Takeaways ⬇️ You can’t break chains until you recognize what you’re connected toYour environment may shape you but it doesn’t have to define youHealing isn’t just physical: it’s mental, emotional, and spiritualThe courage to leave comes from having a plan and executing itCommunity creates belief when your self-belief is still catching upAt some point, you have to stop asking: “Who do they want me to be?” …and start deciding… “Who am I choosing to become?” Choosing yourself isn’t selfish, it’s how you become the example for everyone watching. “You don’t lose yourself overnight… you lose yourself in patterns... and you find yourself the same way.” Grow With Us ⬇️ 🐬 CYC Zoom (Tuesdays 10 a.m.) ❤️‍🩹 Gut Repair Solution 🏝️ Annual CYC Retreat 📖 Choose Yourself to Be Chosen 🎙️ Choose Yourself Channel

    🐬 Amrita Singh - You Can Love Your Culture and Still Outgrow It
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Ratings & Reviews

5
out of 5
4 Ratings

About

Hosted by Hakeem Bourne McFarlane, author of Choose Yourself to Be Chosen and founder of the Choose Yourself Community (CYC). Welcome to The Choose Yourself Channel : where personal growth gets real, faith gets practical, and healing comes with humor. This isn't your average self-help talk. It’s the CYC-GYM - where we flex the dorsal cortex, roast our old habits, and build foundations stronger than our excuses through accountability and innercise. We talk discipline, desire, detoxing from dysfunction, and designing a life that actually feels good based on balance ... from cold showers to calling yourself out. One episode might sound like therapy, another like stand-up, and the next like church with better playlists and preachers. Here, we don’t fake peace for followers. We face our triggers, evaluate our environments, and invest in our evolution. Because choosing yourself isn’t just a slogan ... it’s the daily sport of self-respect! 🐬 Expect truth. Expect laughter. Expect to be uncomfortable - in the best way. Join the movement every Tuesday at 10 a.m. with the Choose Yourself Community on zoom to meet other self choosers virtually hosted by Hakeem. This is The Choose Yourself Channel. Raw. Relatable. Real as growth gets.

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