Coming Back Online

Derek
  • 5.0 (5)
  • Mental Health

Honest talks on Long Term Weed Use, Mental Clarity & Coming Back to Yourself. 

  1. Oct 9

    Taking the Good Days With the Bad | Learning to Show Up in Sobriety

    Recovery isn’t always a straight line, and showing up for yourself on the hard days is something I’m still learning how to do. In this episode, I talk about where I’m at in my journey, what my first year of sobriety taught me, and how different things feel today. I share why I’m learning to sit with difficult emotions instead of making impulsive decisions, giving up, or walking away from something just because I’m having a bad day. Coming Back Online is a reflection of that journey. It’s about continuing to show up, even when things aren’t going the way you hoped, and building a community where we can be honest about the good days, the bad days, and everything in between. Support the show Coming Back Online is about honesty, healing, and personal responsibility. I share my lived experience — not medical advice, not judgments, and not instructions for anyone else.

  2. Sep 29

    When Sobriety Changes Your Relationships

    What happens when getting sober means more than just giving up the substance? Sometimes it means changing your friendships, your routines, your hobbies, your relationships—and even the way you see yourself. In this episode, I talk about the uncomfortable reality of outgrowing parts of your old life while still loving the people who are part of it. You can’t force someone to want recovery, and you don’t have to resent them for being somewhere different in their journey. Sometimes you need to step away, create boundaries, and build a new life without completely closing the door on the people you love. I also talk about the fear of becoming someone new after years of numbing yourself, why the first year of sobriety can be such an important time for discovering who you really are, and why it’s okay for your interests, relationships, and direction in life to change. Sobriety isn’t just about quitting something. It’s about discovering what comes next. And maybe the most exciting part is that you get to meet a version of yourself you never knew existed. You’re not just quitting an old life. You’re coming back online. Support the show Coming Back Online is about honesty, healing, and personal responsibility. I share my lived experience — not medical advice, not judgments, and not instructions for anyone else.

  3. Sep 24

    When Cannabis Stops Serving You: CHS, Dependence & Finding Your Way Back

    In this episode, I’m talking openly about my experience with Cannabis Hyperemesis Syndrome (CHS), what it was like realizing cannabis was no longer serving me, and what can happen when you finally decide it’s time for a change. We’ll talk a little about the different phases of CHS, what may be happening physiologically in the body, and some of the things I experienced along the way. But more importantly, this episode is for anyone who feels like they’ve become dependent on cannabis and wants their life back. Maybe cannabis is making your anxiety worse. Maybe you’re dealing with CHS. Maybe you’re tired of spending the money, tired of feeling tired, or simply realizing that you don’t have the energy or motivation you used to. Whatever your reason, I want this episode to be a reminder that a different life is possible. I also talk about my personal journey, what helped me stay away from cannabis, and my free Zoom group that meets every other Sunday for people who are trying to make this change themselves. If you’re struggling with cannabis right now, you’re not alone. And you don’t have to have everything figured out to take the first step. Come hang out with us, listen to the stories, ask questions, and start coming back online. Support the show Coming Back Online is about honesty, healing, and personal responsibility. I share my lived experience — not medical advice, not judgments, and not instructions for anyone else.

  4. Aug 12

    You Don’t Have to Hit Rock Bottom to Quit Weed

    Maybe you’ve been smoking weed every day for years. Maybe you’ve told yourself you’re going to stop, only to find yourself smoking again a few hours later. And maybe you’re starting to realize that you don’t even enjoy it the way you used to. In this episode, we talk about why quitting can be so difficult when weed has become part of your routine, how boredom, stress, anxiety, and habit can keep you stuck, and why you don’t have to wait until your life falls apart to make a change. You don’t have to hate yourself, hit rock bottom, or have everything figured out. Sometimes you just have to admit that the life you’re living isn’t the life you want anymore and take the first step toward coming back online.  Support the show Coming Back Online is about honesty, healing, and personal responsibility. I share my lived experience — not medical advice, not judgments, and not instructions for anyone else.

  5. Aug 5

    From Rock Bottom to Purpose: Rebuilding My Life After 25 Years of Weed

    n this deeply personal episode, I share the story I’ve never fully told—from the lowest point of my life to the mission that’s now giving me purpose. I open up about my divorce, quitting weed after 25 years, depression, suicidal thoughts, turning 40 alone, and what it was really like rebuilding my life from the ground up. I talk about the unexpected challenges of early sobriety, why I believe community is essential for healing, and how those painful experiences inspired me to create Coming Back Online. I also share why I’ve started a free Zoom recovery community and why I’ve decided to offer one-on-one accountability based on my lived experience. If you’re struggling with anxiety, addiction, emotional numbness, or you’re trying to rediscover who you are after years of escaping, I hope this conversation reminds you that healing is possible, purpose can be found in pain, and you don’t have to go through it alone. In this deeply personal episode, I share the story I’ve never fully told—from the lowest point of my life to the mission that’s now giving me purpose. I open up about my divorce, quitting weed after 25 years, depression, suicidal thoughts, turning 40 alone, and what it was really like rebuilding my life from the ground up. I talk about the unexpected challenges of early sobriety, why I believe community is essential for healing, and how those painful experiences inspired me to create Coming Back Online. I also share why I’ve started a free Zoom recovery community and why I’ve decided to offer one-on-one accountability based on my lived experience. If you’re struggling with anxiety, addiction, emotional numbness, or you’re trying to rediscover who you are after years of escaping, I hope this conversation reminds you that healing is possible, purpose can be found in pain, and you don’t have to go through it alone. Support the show Coming Back Online is about honesty, healing, and personal responsibility. I share my lived experience — not medical advice, not judgments, and not instructions for anyone else.

  6. Jul 21

    The Grief Nobody Talks About When You Quit Weed

    Talking honestly about what happened when I finally quit smoking weed after 26 years. Nobody prepared me for the grief. Not just grieving the plant itself, but grieving the version of me that believed I needed it to get through life. I smoked because I was hurting, because I was escaping, because it became my comfort. Over time, that comfort turned into emotional, physical, and financial dependence. For years I believed I couldn’t live without weed. Today, I’m 9 months sober, and I can finally see that addiction was convincing me of something that wasn’t true. I also talk about how different weed is today—far more potent than what many of us grew up with—and why I believe long-term heavy use played a much bigger role in my anxiety, depression, and mental health than I ever wanted to admit. CHS and my divorce became the wake-up calls I never asked for, but they also became the catalyst that changed my life. Sometimes the hardest seasons force us to become the person we’ve been avoiding. Getting sober didn’t magically fix everything. When you close the door on addiction, you’re still left with a mess to clean up. The difference is you’ve finally stopped creating more of the mess. Now you can actually begin healing, one day at a time. If you’re trying to quit smoking weed or wondering if life gets better on the other side, I hope this conversation reminds you that you’re not alone. Be your own best friend through recovery. Healing takes time, but it is possible. #QuitWeed #QuittingWeed #WeedRecovery #Sobriety #CHS #MentalHealth #AddictionRecovery #ComingBackOnline #CannabisRecovery #SelfHealing #PersonalGrowth #RecoveryJourney Support the show Coming Back Online is about honesty, healing, and personal responsibility. I share my lived experience — not medical advice, not judgments, and not instructions for anyone else.

  7. Jul 9

    No Longer a Prisoner in my own Body

    For years, I thought I was trying to escape stress, anxiety, boredom, and pain. What I eventually realized was that I was trying to escape myself. In this episode of Coming Back Online, I talk about what happened after quitting weed, why recovery was never just about substances, and what it means to slowly rebuild trust in yourself after years of numbing, distracting, and disconnecting. We talk about identity, dopamine, emotional avoidance, midlife reinvention, and the surprising truth that freedom isn’t about escaping your life — it’s about no longer needing to escape yourself. If you’re struggling with dependence, emotional numbness, or feeling disconnected from who you are, I hope this conversation reminds you that coming back online is possible. — Coming Back Online is a podcast about sobriety, nervous system healing, emotional honesty, and reconnecting with yourself after years of surviving on autopilot. Follow along: Instagram: @comingbackonline Support the show Coming Back Online is about honesty, healing, and personal responsibility. I share my lived experience — not medical advice, not judgments, and not instructions for anyone else.

  8. Jun 27

    Control the Controllable-Everything else is Noise

    In this episode, we’re talking about one of the most powerful shifts you can make in your life — learning to focus on what you can actually control. We live in a world full of noise, unpredictability, and other people’s behavior, and most of it is completely out of our hands. But how you take care of your mind, your body, and your habits? That’s yours. I get personal in this one — talking about my journey quitting weed, going through a divorce, building Coming Back Online from scratch, and how some of the hardest, most painful chapters of my life ended up being the greatest catalysts for change. From CBT group therapy to tango dancing, I share what’s waiting for you on the other side of the struggle — if you’re willing to take the first step. No judgment here. Just honesty, real talk, and a reminder that we are all works in progress. 🎙️ Topics covered: •The law of impermanence and why control is an illusion — mostly •Recognizing what’s actually running your life •How to turn negative energy into fuel for growth •Addiction, all-or-nothing thinking, and self-awareness •Why quitting weed opened doors I never expected •The ripple effect of one person’s change on an entire community Support the show Coming Back Online is about honesty, healing, and personal responsibility. I share my lived experience — not medical advice, not judgments, and not instructions for anyone else.

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About

Honest talks on Long Term Weed Use, Mental Clarity & Coming Back to Yourself. 

Information

  • Creator
    Derek
  • Years Active
    2026
  • Episodes
    19
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © 2026 Coming Back Online
  • Show Website
    Coming Back Online