No Context Cinema Club

Kev & Rob
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No Context Cinema Club is a comedy film podcast where famous movies are rewritten from scratch, without ever being watched. Each episode, one host attempts a full movie rewrite based purely on the title, armed with only vague clues and zero context. What follows is a completely improvised story that often spirals into something wildly different from the original film. Blending comedy podcast chaos with funny film critique, film discussion and creative storytelling, every episode ends with the rewrite being scored for coherence, entertainment and originality. The results feed into a live leaderboard where listeners can vote and decide which movie rewrites deserve to rise to the top, and which should be forgotten entirely. If you enjoy comedy podcasts, movie podcasts, movie rewrites, and fun film discussions with a completely original twist, No Context Cinema Club delivers something genuinely different. New episodes weekly.

  1. 1d ago

    Trainspotting reimagined - Operation Proceed Directly to the Intravenous Injection of Hard Drugs (ep.34)

    What if Trainspotting wasn’t about heroin addiction in Edinburgh… but a zombie-ravaged Britain, an armoured railway and a plan to stop Europe reclaiming the country? In this episode of No Context Cinema Club – a comedy film podcast and movie rewrite podcast – Rob rewrites Trainspotting as a post-apocalyptic zombie action film set twenty years after Britain was abandoned. Europe returns with a plan to clear the country using heavily armed trains designed to lure zombies towards the railway. But the survivors who have spent two decades rebuilding Britain have no intention of handing it back. Expect: • Armoured trains packed with weapons and speakers • Survivors living in fortified enclaves • Thousands of zombies deliberately gathered beside the railway • A captured train sent back towards the European base • Some very literal train spotting After the rewrite, Kev scores the film for coherence, entertainment and originality. If you enjoy movie podcasts, comedy podcasts, zombie films, post-apocalyptic stories and ridiculous movie rewrites treated with complete seriousness, this episode turns Trainspotting into a battle for Britain’s railways. Get in touch Got a film we have to re-write? Think we’ve completely lost the plot?  🎬 Film suggestions & score debates → kev@nocontextcinemaclub.com  🎟️ Quizzes & made-up movie rights → rob@nocontextcinemaclub.com  🍿 Feedback & episode questions → show@nocontextcinemaclub.com

  2. Sep 12

    The Shawshank Redemption reimagined - where have all the passengers gone? (ep. 33)

    What if The Shawshank Redemption wasn’t about a man serving life in prison… but five travel bloggers trapped overnight inside a remote hotel where every room seems designed to kill them? In this episode of No Context Cinema Club – a comedy film podcast and movie rewrite podcast – Rob rewrites The Shawshank Redemption as a psychological horror thriller set inside the isolated Shawshank Hotel in British Columbia. Five travel bloggers are invited separately to the grand opening of a newly renovated luxury hotel, each believing they’ve been chosen because of their online following. What they don’t know is that every one of them has previously left a brutal review of another hotel owned by the same man. When they arrive, there are no staff. Instead, they’re told to help themselves to drinks, explore the hotel and wait for a presentation at 8pm. Then the doors lock. Expect: • Five travel bloggers with a suspiciously specific connection to the hotel owner • Corridors filled with apparent tripwires and deadly traps • Swinging knives, overheating kitchens and collapsing stairwells • A swimming pool that appears to have transformed into a crocodile-filled swamp • A final reveal that completely changes what the audience thinks they’ve been watching After the rewrite is locked in, Kev scores the film for coherence, entertainment and originality, feeding into the show’s live leaderboard. If you enjoy movie podcasts, comedy podcasts, horror thrillers, psychological mysteries, unreliable perspectives, bad hotels and completely ridiculous film pitches treated with absolute seriousness, this episode turns The Shawshank Redemption into one very strange night at the Shawshank Hotel. Has Rob created a clever psychological thriller about paranoia, group hysteria and revenge… or, as Kev suggests, one of the worst films he’s written so far? Get in touch Got a film we have to re-write? Think we’ve completely lost the plot?  🎬 Film suggestions & score debates → kev@nocontextcinemaclub.com  🎟️ Quizzes & made-up movie rights → rob@nocontextcinemaclub.com  🍿 Feedback & episode questions → show@nocontextcinemaclub.com

  3. Sep 5

    Forrest Gump reimagined - I won't judge you against the 75 IQ president (ep. 32)

    What if Forrest Gump wasn’t about one extraordinary man drifting through decades of American history… but three elections, three versions of the same man and a lifelong attempt to finally win something? In this episode of No Context Cinema Club – a comedy film podcast and movie rewrite podcast – Rob rewrites Forrest Gump as a political drama following Forrest through three completely different stages of his life, with all three stories unfolding alongside each other. As a child in Alabama, Forrest runs for class president.Years later, he runs to become mayor of his hometown.And decades after that, against almost impossible odds, Forrest Gump runs for President of the United States.The scale changes dramatically but the problems don’t. Expect: • Three election campaigns playing out across Forrest’s life • A school bully trying to frighten him out of running for class president • Political advisers repeatedly telling Forrest to choose popularity over loyalty • Bribes, donors and increasingly serious versions of the same moral compromises • A mayoral campaign where Forrest decides to reveal his own mistakes before somebody else can • A presidential campaign threatened by something considerably more serious than bad polling • Three televised debates and one very inconvenient habit of completely freezing under pressure After the rewrite is locked in, Kev scores the film for coherence, entertainment and originality, feeding into the show’s live leaderboard. If you enjoy movie podcasts, comedy podcasts, political dramas, underdog stories, parallel timelines, inspirational speeches and completely ridiculous film pitches treated with absolute seriousness, this episode turns Forrest Gump into the unlikely story of a man who spends his entire life running for something. Has Rob created an uplifting political drama about loyalty, honesty and learning from failure… or somehow invented a presidential candidate whose greatest campaign strategy is occasionally remembering to answer the question? Get in touch Got a film we have to re-write? Think we’ve completely lost the plot?  🎬 Film suggestions & score debates → kev@nocontextcinemaclub.com  🎟️ Quizzes & made-up movie rights → rob@nocontextcinemaclub.com  🍿 Feedback & episode questions → show@nocontextcinemaclub.com

  4. Aug 29

    The Devil's Advocate reimagined - it's just oven mitts all the way down (ep. 31)

    What if The Devil’s Advocate wasn’t about a young lawyer being tempted by Satan… but a famous defence attorney whose impossible courtroom victories hide something far darker? In this episode of No Context Cinema Club – a comedy film podcast and movie rewrite podcast – Rob rewrites The Devil’s Advocate as a crime thriller about New York’s most notorious lawyer, a man famous for defending defendants everyone else already believes are guilty. The film opens outside a New York courthouse, where the trial of the year is about to begin. The evidence against the accused appears overwhelming. But the case has attracted national attention because of the man defending him. A lawyer the American press has nicknamed… "The Devil’s Advocate." He has built his career taking apparently impossible murder cases and finding reasonable doubt where nobody else can. He doesn’t need to prove what happened. He only needs to convince a jury that something else might have. And somehow, he usually wins. Expect: • Keanu Reeves as a defence lawyer with an almost unbelievable courtroom record • Murder cases that seem completely impossible to defend • A spectacularly questionable reasonable-doubt courtroom trick • A distinctive pair of gloves that become much more important than they first appear • Anonymous photographs suggesting somebody has been watching for a very long time • A lawyer suddenly performing very differently when one case becomes dangerously personal After the rewrite is locked in, Kev scores the film for coherence, entertainment and originality, feeding into the show’s live leaderboard. If you enjoy movie podcasts, comedy podcasts, crime thrillers, courtroom dramas, serial killer mysteries, legal arguments and completely ridiculous film pitches treated with absolute seriousness, this episode turns The Devil’s Advocate into a story about reasonable doubt, notoriety and a lawyer who might know far more about his cases than he should. Has Rob created a dark psychological thriller about the ethics of defending the indefensible… or a legal system held together by oven mitts and increasingly questionable courtroom procedure? Get in touch Got a film we have to re-write? Think we’ve completely lost the plot?  🎬 Film suggestions & score debates → kev@nocontextcinemaclub.com  🎟️ Quizzes & made-up movie rights → rob@nocontextcinemaclub.com  🍿 Feedback & episode questions → show@nocontextcinemaclub.com

  5. Aug 22

    Mad Max reimagined - why would a goose be in an asylum? (ep. 30)

    What if Mad Max wasn’t about a police officer battling a violent motorcycle gang… but an abandoned psychiatric hospital, two urban explorers and a reality that becomes harder to trust the deeper they go inside? In this episode of No Context Cinema Club – a comedy film podcast and movie rewrite podcast – Rob rewrites Mad Max as a psychological horror thriller set inside a supposedly abandoned maximum-security psychiatric hospital known locally as “Mad Max.” The film begins with two close friends, Leon and Noel, planning an urban exploration of the notorious abandoned hospital. They’ve heard the stories about voices in empty corridors, figures appearing at windows and people entering the building only to become completely disorientated inside. Neither of them really believes the rumours. Then they get inside. As Leon and Noel explore deeper into Mad Max, Leon begins finding objects that seem strangely familiar – an old childhood toy, a poster he remembers owning and a book he recognises from years earlier. There’s just one problem. None of those things should be there. Expect: • An abandoned maximum-security psychiatric hospital nicknamed “Mad Max” • Two urban explorers becoming hopelessly lost inside seemingly impossible corridors • Childhood possessions appearing where they absolutely shouldn’t be • Footsteps, flickering lights and a mysterious stranger calling Leon by name • A completely unnecessary goose impression during a horror sequence • Two versions of the same hospital beginning to exist at the same time After the rewrite is locked in, Kev scores the film for coherence, entertainment and originality, feeding into the show’s live leaderboard. If you enjoy movie podcasts, comedy podcasts, psychological horror, unreliable reality, abandoned buildings, urban exploration, mystery thrillers and completely ridiculous film pitches treated with absolute seriousness, this episode sends Mel Gibson into a version of Mad Max containing considerably fewer cars and considerably more psychiatric corridors. Has Rob created a genuinely unsettling psychological horror story about perception, fear and choosing which version of reality to trust… or just reinvented Shutter Island with a goose? Get in touch Got a film we have to re-write? Think we’ve completely lost the plot?  🎬 Film suggestions & score debates → kev@nocontextcinemaclub.com  🎟️ Quizzes & made-up movie rights → rob@nocontextcinemaclub.com  🍿 Feedback & episode questions → show@nocontextcinemaclub.com

  6. Aug 15

    The Negotiator reimagined - Kasey Spevin, sleazebag extraordinaire (ep. 29)

    What if The Negotiator wasn’t about a hostage negotiator caught in a conspiracy… but a multi-million-pound lottery ticket, four competing claims and one man trying to work out who actually won it? In this episode of No Context Cinema Club – a comedy film podcast and movie rewrite podcast – Rob rewrites The Negotiator as a mystery thriller built around a wedding favour that becomes worth millions overnight. The film begins on the morning of a wedding, as staff prepare a country venue for the reception. At every place setting is a small envelope containing a lottery ticket, personally created by the bride and groom for each guest using birthdays, their wedding date and one final number unique to the person it was intended for. By the time the winning numbers are drawn, one of those tickets has become life-changingly valuable. There’s just one problem. Nobody agrees who it belongs to. Expect: • A wedding seating-plan change that suddenly matters a lot more than it should • A lottery ticket worth millions ending up in completely the wrong hands • A spectacularly sleazy guest with photographic evidence on his side • A mysterious barmaid with a completely different version of events • Samuel L. Jackson sitting at the head of the table trying to untangle the whole mess • A “whodunnit” where nobody has been murdered – the only question is who won it? The story moves between the wedding night and a tense boardroom negotiation, with each person reconstructing the same events from their own perspective. Every new detail changes the argument, as intention, possession, gifts and questionable decisions all become part of the case. After the rewrite is locked in, Kev scores the film for coherence, entertainment and originality, feeding into the show’s live leaderboard. If you enjoy movie podcasts, comedy podcasts, mystery thrillers, courtroom-style arguments, lottery stories, unreliable witnesses and completely ridiculous film pitches treated with absolute seriousness, this episode turns one wedding reception into a very expensive game of “Who Won It?” Has Rob created a genuinely compelling mystery about ownership, morality and one tiny decision that changes everything… or just invented the world’s most complicated argument over a wedding favour? Get in touch Got a film we have to re-write? Think we’ve completely lost the plot?  🎬 Film suggestions & score debates → kev@nocontextcinemaclub.com  🎟️ Quizzes & made-up movie rights → rob@nocontextcinemaclub.com  🍿 Feedback & episode questions → show@nocontextcinemaclub.com

  7. Aug 8

    Four Lions reimagined - send Brother Crow to heaven (ep. 28)

    What if Four Lions wasn’t about four incompetent terrorists… but four selfish survivors travelling across a zombie-infested Britain with a pack of real lions protecting them? In this episode of No Context Cinema Club – a comedy film podcast and movie rewrite podcast – Rob rewrites Four Lions as a zombie survival thriller about four opportunistic friends, an abandoned theme park, a disastrous journey back to Chippenham and an unlikely alliance with escaped lions. The film begins several weeks after a zombie outbreak has overwhelmed England and Scotland. Britain’s borders have been sealed, and millions of survivors are being marched along fortified motorways towards Liverpool, where ferries are supposedly waiting to evacuate them to Ireland. Expect: • An explosive crow being launched into a zombie horde • A f****d-up rabbit with no ears • A Honey Monster costume worn through the apocalypse • Rubber dinghy rapids providing an unlikely escape route • An abandoned Alton Towers overrun with zombies • A former zookeeper claiming that lions will remember him • Four escaped lions hunting the infected across the countryside After the rewrite is locked in, Kev scores the film for coherence, entertainment and originality, feeding into the show’s live leaderboard – and awards Rob his first-ever score of ten in any category. If you enjoy movie podcasts, comedy podcasts, zombie films, British humour, survival thrillers, Four Lions, unlikely animal companions and completely ridiculous film pitches taken far too seriously, this episode combines the zombie apocalypse with a road trip through the English countryside. Has Rob created an entertaining British zombie adventure about loyalty, survival and four surprisingly heroic lions… or just sent four criminals through Alton Towers in a Honey Monster costume before feeding them to the local wildlife? Get in touch Got a film we have to re-write? Think we’ve completely lost the plot?  🎬 Film suggestions & score debates → kev@nocontextcinemaclub.com  🎟️ Quizzes & made-up movie rights → rob@nocontextcinemaclub.com  🍿 Feedback & episode questions → show@nocontextcinemaclub.com

  8. Aug 1

    Pulp Fiction reimagined - kowtowed to the whims of fabric (ep. 27)

    What if Pulp Fiction wasn’t about hitmen, gangsters and a mysterious briefcase… but two conspiracy investigators who discover that reality itself is being rewritten? In this episode of No Context Cinema Club – a comedy film podcast and movie rewrite podcast – Rob rewrites Pulp Fiction as a sci-fi mystery thriller about a successful podcast, impossible gaps in history and a simulation that may destroy itself if too many people discover the truth. The story follows two close friends who host The Fictionists, a podcast dedicated to disproving conspiracy theories. They believe wild stories about UFOs, hauntings, Bigfoot and secret organisations are deliberately encouraged to distract the public from genuine government cover-ups. After years of debunking famous conspiracies, they invite listeners to submit their own unexplained cases. What arrives is far stranger than another blurry photograph of Bigfoot. Expect: • A Victorian hotel that appears in photographs but not in reality • A mysterious briefcase containing a catastrophic surprise • A government fixer played by Harvey Keitel • Thousands of investigators documenting glitches in the world • A simulation programmed to destroy itself if humanity learns the truth After the rewrite is locked in, Kev scores the film for coherence, entertainment and originality, feeding into the show’s live leaderboard. If you enjoy movie podcasts, comedy podcasts, simulation theories, conspiracy mysteries, alternate realities, The Matrix, Mandela Effect stories and completely ridiculous film pitches taken far too seriously, this episode offers a very different version of Pulp Fiction. Has Rob created a clever sci-fi thriller about truth, belief and the danger of asking too many questions… or simply reinvented The Matrix with a podcast, a glowing briefcase and far too much underground storage? Get in touch Got a film we have to re-write? Think we’ve completely lost the plot?  🎬 Film suggestions & score debates → kev@nocontextcinemaclub.com  🎟️ Quizzes & made-up movie rights → rob@nocontextcinemaclub.com  🍿 Feedback & episode questions → show@nocontextcinemaclub.com

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About

No Context Cinema Club is a comedy film podcast where famous movies are rewritten from scratch, without ever being watched. Each episode, one host attempts a full movie rewrite based purely on the title, armed with only vague clues and zero context. What follows is a completely improvised story that often spirals into something wildly different from the original film. Blending comedy podcast chaos with funny film critique, film discussion and creative storytelling, every episode ends with the rewrite being scored for coherence, entertainment and originality. The results feed into a live leaderboard where listeners can vote and decide which movie rewrites deserve to rise to the top, and which should be forgotten entirely. If you enjoy comedy podcasts, movie podcasts, movie rewrites, and fun film discussions with a completely original twist, No Context Cinema Club delivers something genuinely different. New episodes weekly.

Information

  • Creator
    Kev & Rob
  • Years Active
    2026
  • Episodes
    36
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © 2026 No Context Cinema Club
  • Show Website
    No Context Cinema Club