One of her children is only there half of the time.In this episode, I'm sitting down with Paula, founder of Kakuaa Coaching, who's living the exact thing she coaches as stepmother to her husband's daughter, and mother to the two boys they share, all under one roof. We talk about what she and her husband negotiated before they ever blended their household, how they make decisions once you're actually living it, and what it's really like when one of your kids is only home half the time.Paula doesn't pretend this is easy or that she's "got it figured out" - she's refreshingly honest that there's no finish line here, just an ongoing, evolving negotiation. If you're blending a family, married into one, or just trying to understand what it takes to co-parent well across two households, this conversation is worth your full attention.This episode pairs with The Child of Divorce Story: Two Divorces, a Blended Family — a different vantage point on what it takes to blend one.// CHAPTERS00:00 – What Nobody Tells You About Blending a Family01:46 – Meet Paula: Stepmother, Mother, Coach02:01 – A Week in a Blended Household03:52 – What They Negotiated Before Blending06:09 – Aligning as Co-Parents (and With the Other Household)08:09 – The Parallel to an Amicable Divorce10:56 – "Going Back to Beige": Staying Neutral12:48 – The Thing They Didn't Plan For: Her Own Voice16:21 – Boundaries: What "Within Reason" Actually Means19:42 – Keeping Consistency Across Two Households22:10 – Is There Ever a "We've Got This" Moment?23:56 – Becoming One of Five24:49 – Helping Her Sons Understand Two Homes28:59 – Household Rules: What Has to Match, What Doesn't32:08 – The Boundary Paula Set for Herself34:24 – Advice to Her First-Year Self35:19 – Where to Find Paula36:20 – Closing Thoughts// RESOURCES🔥 Learn how you can achieve an Amicable Divorce with my free workshop: https://divorceatelier.com/amicable-workshop🔥 "Two Homes" by Claire Masurel, the children's book Paula used to explain two-household life to her son: https://amzn.to/4hoZDgj➤ HELP OTHERS SUBSCRIBE WITH THIS LINK: https://www.youtube.com/@UCUD7Hg4M01ZYVGTc7vuHv1g // OTHER VIDEOS TO CHECK OUTCHILD OF DIVORCE, THEN A STEPDAUGHTER➤ https://youtu.be/nVDvJY2Yll8PARENTING EXPERT'S DO'S and DON'TS➤ Coming soon.... About Iman:Iman Ibrahim spent 19 years as a family lawyer in Singapore and England & Wales before founding The Divorce Atelier where she helps people navigate divorce with the decision-making, negotiation, and communication frameworks that actually move you forward. She's a CDC Certified Divorce Coach, parenting coach and mediator, and hosts Divorce, Actually.Let's connectIman Ibrahim https://www.instagram.com/theimanibrahim/Paula Dellocchio https://www.instagram.com/kakuaa_coaching/Kakua Coaching https://www.kakuaacoaching.com/// DISCLAIMER This podcast is for informational and educational purposes only. It is not legal advice, and listening to it does not create a coach-client, lawyer-client, or therapeutic relationship. Divorce law and process vary by jurisdiction — nothing here substitutes for advice from a lawyer licensed where you live, or support from a licensed mental health professional. Paula's views are her own.Keywords:blended family, stepmother, co-parenting, blending a family, second marriage parenting, stepparent role, 50/50 custody, blended household rules, sibling dynamics blended family, divorce coach, family law, Divorce Actually podcast, Iman Ibrahim, Paula Dellocchio, Kakuaa Coaching
