The Anatomy of Modern Romance Scams

Michael B
  • 4.5 (4)
  • Education

The Anatomy of Modern Romance Scams examines how long-term, attachment-driven deception operates beneath what are commonly called “romance scams.” These scams don’t begin with money—they begin with trust, emotional connection, and carefully constructed relationships that evolve over time. This series breaks down how those connections form, how trust is manipulated, and how the impact unfolds across emotional, relational, and financial dimensions. Based on lived experience and structured analysis, each episode focuses on a specific component of the process—helping listeners understand not just what happens, but how it happens. The goal is simple: increase awareness, restore clarity, and help strengthen prevention. For a deeper, firsthand account of how these scams unfold step by step, the book can now be found on Amazon.  Please search  "Ding — “Hello Dear, How Are You?”  

  1. Sep 10

    Episode 38 – The Anatomy of Modern Romance Scams | When the Scam Is Over but the Pain Isn’t

    First of all, thank you for listening in. Hoping this helps individuals and families understand romance scams. If you have questions or want something to be discussed specifically, please comment or go to my website michaelbreinig.com to privately message me. All the best to you... What happens when the scam is over - but the pain continues? The messages may stop and the deception may be exposed, but the consequences of a modern romance scam do not end with the final transaction. In this episode, I speak directly about "The PIt."  The one in your stomach that remains because of - the grief, shame, financial devastation, damaged relationships, and loss of trust in your own judgment. When those consequences collide with a job loss, illness, or other pressures, even an ordinary setback can feel like additional proof that life will never recover.  The weight of it is all is tremendous. The scammers constructed their web one strand at a time: attachment, anticipation, trust, secrecy, and isolation. Rebuilding happens the same way—but in reverse. Each honest conversation, real relationship, daily responsibility, and request for help adds a strand to a new web — one designed not to trap you, but to catch you.  The recovery net. The first web was built to bind you. The next can become your safety net. Just as intentional, but this is one you build, also one strand at a time. Build it soon.  Build it strong.  Start now... This is an ongoing podcast series that explores the anatomy of modern romance scams and introduces practical tools designed to help you recognize, avoid, and recover from these crimes.  The AOM Framework™ Your Personal Rulebook — Gave a foundation for this, but please, build your own personal rules to recognize danger, make better decisions, and protect yourself before a scam ever takes hold.  Always validate. The Scammer's Playbook — Learn how scammers build trust, create dependency, and manipulate their victims. The Four S's — Secrecy. Silence. Shame. Seduction. The 15/30 Rule — Stop. Step back. Evaluate before you act. Pattern Recognition — Recognize where the scam is going before it gets there. DBW: Delete. Block. Walk. — Protect yourself. Walk away.  This is critical. Learn More: Books available to read, keep, or pass on. 📘 DING... "Hello Dear, Did You Miss Me?" https://a.co/d/0eaBEMlu  📗 The Reality Behind Romance Scams: The Playbook https://a.co/d/0aV7btcS 🌐 Website: michaelbauthor.com 🎥 Book Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tzbubG0gxfo If these episodes helped you, please follow, and share them with someone you care about, and help spread awareness. Until next time... Delete. Block. Walk. And al...

  2. Aug 24

    Episode 37 - The Anatomy of Modern Romance Scams | The Biology of the Playbook: When the Scam Gets Inside You

    First of all, thank you for listening in. Hoping this helps individuals and families understand romance scams. If you have questions or want something to be discussed specifically, please comment or go to my website michaelbreinig.com to privately message me. All the best to you... What if the Romance Scam Playbook isn't just manipulating your mind? What if it's also exploiting the biology that helps human beings form real relationships? In Episode 37, we explore the biological side of romance scams—dopamine and anticipation, oxytocin and social bonding, cortisol and adrenaline during stress—and how these responses can interact with psychological manipulation to create an extraordinarily powerful attachment. Using Jessica as an example, we follow the progression from a simple “Good morning, beautiful” to anticipation, attachment, dependency, stress, relief—and eventually a relationship powerful enough to compete with logic itself. This episode also introduces a new framework: The Four Pillars of a Romance Scam — Attachment, Dependency, Control, and Override. And it addresses one of the hardest questions victims and families ask: “If you knew something was wrong, why didn't you stop?” The answer may be far more complicated than simply recognizing the red flags. People are educated and aware enough to recognize the extraction. It's time we learn how to recognize the construction.  The construction of an INTIMATE relationship that NEEDS to be in place before an extraction request enters the picture. The deception may be fake. The human response is real.  This is critical to understand. This podcast has now surpassed 2,000 downloads on just one channel.  This one.  There is more! Thank you to everyone listening, sharing, and helping get this message in front of the people who need it, or will need it. Keep sharing. Keep talking. Keep getting the message out. Here is a link to the article I was speaking about.  Please take the time to read it.  I know it will facilitate greater understanding of the biological changes that take place in a romance scam victim and why the scammers playbook and script are designed to elicit  these chemical reactions: https://fightcybercrime.org/blog/how-cybercriminals-hack-the-human-brain/?utm_source=Newsletter&utm_campaign=f84ce5def9-EMAIL_CAMPAIGN_2026_07_14_06_20_COPY_01&utm_medium=email&utm_term=0_-0373822c57-517049651 Stay informed.  Keep listening.  Keep sharing and always, always...stay safe. This is an ongoing podcast series that explores the anatomy of modern romance scams and introduces practical tools designed to help you recognize, avoid, and recover from these crimes.  The AOM Framework™ Your Personal Rulebook — Gave a foundation for this, but please, build your own personal rules to recognize danger, make better decisions, and protect yourself before a scam ever takes hold.  Always validate. The Scammer's Playbook — Learn how scammers build trust, create dependency, and manipulate their victims. The Four S's — Secrecy. Silence. Shame. Seduction. The 15/30 Rule — Stop. Step back. Evaluate before you act. Pattern Recognition — Recognize where the scam is going before it gets there. DBW: Delete. Block. Walk. — Protect yourself. Walk away.  This is critical. Learn More: Books available to read, keep, or pass on. 📘 DING... "Hello Dear, Did You Miss Me?" https://a.co/d/0eaBEMlu  📗 The Reality Behind Romance Scams: The Playbook https://a.co/d/0aV7btcS 🌐 Website: michaelbauthor.com 🎥 Book Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tzbubG0gxfo If these episodes helped you, please follow, and share them with someone you care about, and help spread awareness. Until next time... Delete. Block. Walk. And al...

  3. Aug 17

    Episode 36 - The Anatomy of Modern Romance Scams | When Multiple Hooks Become the Net

    First of all, thank you for listening in. Hoping this helps individuals and families understand romance scams. If you have questions or want something to be discussed specifically, please comment or go to my website michaelbreinig.com to privately message me. All the best to you... In this episode of The Anatomy of Modern Romance Scams, I look at how a romance scammer builds an emotional connection one "hook" at a time. Good morning, honey. Did you eat? I miss you! Did you dream about me last night? I love you. Each message seems harmless But each one can become another hook. Over time, those hooks become lines, and enough lines become a net. I also discuss why single and widowed women can become targets of romance scammers, why these relationships can feel more comfortable than real relationships, and why family members often struggle to understand why someone they love simply cannot walk away. The money request is not where the scam begins. The relationship is the scam. The money is the objective. By the time the money request arrives, the victim may no longer feel like they're deciding whether to send money. They may feel like they're deciding whether to lose someone they love. I know how powerful that net can become because I've been inside it.  Looking for a way out and by then the way out is not simple.  Not easy.  It's painful as hell actually. My hope is that understanding how those hooks are set will help someone recognize them before the net ever has a chance to form. Delete. Block. Walk.  Use it and know you made a good decision. Until next time, stay aware, stay protected... and always, always stay safe! This is an ongoing podcast series that explores the anatomy of modern romance scams and introduces practical tools designed to help you recognize, avoid, and recover from these crimes.  The AOM Framework™ Your Personal Rulebook — Gave a foundation for this, but please, build your own personal rules to recognize danger, make better decisions, and protect yourself before a scam ever takes hold.  Always validate. The Scammer's Playbook — Learn how scammers build trust, create dependency, and manipulate their victims. The Four S's — Secrecy. Silence. Shame. Seduction. The 15/30 Rule — Stop. Step back. Evaluate before you act. Pattern Recognition — Recognize where the scam is going before it gets there. DBW: Delete. Block. Walk. — Protect yourself. Walk away.  This is critical. Learn More: Books available to read, keep, or pass on. 📘 DING... "Hello Dear, Did You Miss Me?" https://a.co/d/0eaBEMlu  📗 The Reality Behind Romance Scams: The Playbook https://a.co/d/0aV7btcS 🌐 Website: michaelbauthor.com 🎥 Book Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tzbubG0gxfo If these episodes helped you, please follow, and share them with someone you care about, and help spread awareness. Until next time... Delete. Block. Walk. And al...

  4. Aug 12

    Episode 35 - The Anatomy of Modern Romance Scams || When Someone You Love Will Not Believe You

    First of all, thank you for listening in. Hoping this helps individuals and families understand romance scams. If you have questions or want something to be discussed specifically, please comment or go to my website michaelbreinig.com to privately message me. All the best to you... What do you do when someone you love is caught in a romance scam—but they refuse to believe it? In Episode 35, I am speaking directly to the husbands, wives, sons, daughters, family members, and friends watching someone they care about become emotionally attached to a person who may not even exist. Romance scammers follow a deliberate playbook: build familiarity, mirror interests, create intimacy, encourage secrecy, and eventually introduce money. By the time family members recognize what is happening, emotional attachment may already be stronger than evidence. This episode explores why confrontation often fails, why victims continue defending the relationship, and how families can fight for the person they love instead of against them. Because sometimes exposing the scam is only the beginning. The harder challenge is helping someone you love believe the truth.    This is an ongoing podcast series that explores the anatomy of modern romance scams and introduces practical tools designed to help you recognize, avoid, and recover from these crimes.  The AOM Framework™ Your Personal Rulebook — Gave a foundation for this, but please, build your own personal rules to recognize danger, make better decisions, and protect yourself before a scam ever takes hold.  Always validate. The Scammer's Playbook — Learn how scammers build trust, create dependency, and manipulate their victims. The Four S's — Secrecy. Silence. Shame. Seduction. The 15/30 Rule — Stop. Step back. Evaluate before you act. Pattern Recognition — Recognize where the scam is going before it gets there. DBW: Delete. Block. Walk. — Protect yourself. Walk away.  This is critical. Learn More: Books available to read, keep, or pass on. 📘 DING... "Hello Dear, Did You Miss Me?" https://a.co/d/0eaBEMlu  📗 The Reality Behind Romance Scams: The Playbook https://a.co/d/0aV7btcS 🌐 Website: michaelbauthor.com 🎥 Book Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tzbubG0gxfo If these episodes helped you, please follow, and share them with someone you care about, and help spread awareness. Until next time... Delete. Block. Walk. And al...

  5. Aug 8

    Episode 34 - The Anatomy of Modern Romance Scams | Four Messages - One Script

    First of all, thank you for listening in. Hoping this helps individuals and families understand romance scams. If you have questions or want something to be discussed specifically, please comment or go to my website michaelbreinig.com to privately message me. All the best to you... This week I received four unsolicited conversation starters—two on Facebook and two on LinkedIn. LinkedIn blocked the one user and conversation.  They said something explicit.  The other, I kept going for one reason - I wanted to see whether the scammers' playbook had changed. It hadn't. The friendly conversation. The request to exchange photos. The move to another messaging platform (Telegram, WhatsApp or Signal...my choice of course.) Questions about my age and personal life. And finally... "Would I like to learn about cryptocurrency investing?" Different platform. Same script. It reinforced one simple truth: Delete. Block. Walk. Remember it and use it...because it works. In the second half of this episode, with her permission, I share my interview with fellow podcaster Nicole Ringgold.  Where she invites me to discuss my personal story, the psychology behind romance scams, and the lessons I wish I had understood before my own life changed forever. Please find it here: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/michael-breinig-delete-block-walk/id1893797968?i=1000778099801 If you take only one thing away from this episode, let it be this: Fifteen seconds. That's all it takes to Delete, Block, and Walk away. Those fifteen seconds may save you from thirty years of consequences. Resources: Nichole Ringgold's podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/michael-breinig-delete-block-walk/id1893797968?i=1000778099801 My Website: https://michaelbauthor.com Books: https://amazon.com/author/michael-bAlways Validate Delete. Block. Walk Always Always...Stay Safe This is an ongoing podcast series that explores the anatomy of modern romance scams and introduces practical tools designed to help you recognize, avoid, and recover from these crimes.  The AOM Framework™ Your Personal Rulebook — Gave a foundation for this, but please, build your own personal rules to recognize danger, make better decisions, and protect yourself before a scam ever takes hold.  Always validate. The Scammer's Playbook — Learn how scammers build trust, create dependency, and manipulate their victims. The Four S's — Secrecy. Silence. Shame. Seduction. The 15/30 Rule — Stop. Step back. Evaluate before you act. Pattern Recognition — Recognize where the scam is going before it gets there. DBW: Delete. Block. Walk. — Protect yourself. Walk away.  This is critical. Learn More: Books available to read, keep, or pass on. 📘 DING... "Hello Dear, Did You Miss Me?" https://a.co/d/0eaBEMlu  📗 The Reality Behind Romance Scams: The Playbook https://a.co/d/0aV7btcS 🌐 Website: michaelbauthor.com 🎥 Book Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tzbubG0gxfo If these episodes helped you, please follow, and share them with someone you care about, and help spread awareness. Until next time... Delete. Block. Walk. And al...

  6. Aug 2

    Episode 33 - The Anatomy of Modern Romance Scams | Thank You

    First of all, thank you for listening in. Hoping this helps individuals and families understand romance scams. If you have questions or want something to be discussed specifically, please comment or go to my website michaelbreinig.com to privately message me. All the best to you... Some episodes teach. Some episodes explain. This one simply says thank you. In this deeply personal episode, I reflect on the messages, stories, and encouragement I've received from listeners around the world. Your courage to speak openly about one of the most painful experiences of your lives has reminded me that none of us walks this journey alone. We share a common bond—not because we wanted to, but because we understand what emotional manipulation, betrayal, and loss truly feel like. Together, we continue moving forward one day at a time. I also discuss why victims should never allow shame to define them, why your stories remain sacred, and why every act of sharing helps someone else recognize the warning signs before they become the next victim. Thank you for your trust. Thank you for your courage. Thank you for reminding me why this podcast exists. You now have the Scammer's Playbook. You now have Your Personal Rulebook. Use them well. Delete. Block. Walk. This is an ongoing podcast series that explores the anatomy of modern romance scams and introduces practical tools designed to help you recognize, avoid, and recover from these crimes.  The AOM Framework™ Your Personal Rulebook — Gave a foundation for this, but please, build your own personal rules to recognize danger, make better decisions, and protect yourself before a scam ever takes hold.  Always validate. The Scammer's Playbook — Learn how scammers build trust, create dependency, and manipulate their victims. The Four S's — Secrecy. Silence. Shame. Seduction. The 15/30 Rule — Stop. Step back. Evaluate before you act. Pattern Recognition — Recognize where the scam is going before it gets there. DBW: Delete. Block. Walk. — Protect yourself. Walk away.  This is critical. Learn More: Books available to read, keep, or pass on. 📘 DING... "Hello Dear, Did You Miss Me?" https://a.co/d/0eaBEMlu  📗 The Reality Behind Romance Scams: The Playbook https://a.co/d/0aV7btcS 🌐 Website: michaelbauthor.com 🎥 Book Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tzbubG0gxfo If these episodes helped you, please follow, and share them with someone you care about, and help spread awareness. Until next time... Delete. Block. Walk. And al...

  7. Jul 30

    Episode 32 – The Anatomy of Modern Romance Scams | Scammers Are Still Trying — Why Delete. Block. Walk. Matters!

    First of all, thank you for listening in. Hoping this helps individuals and families understand romance scams. If you have questions or want something to be discussed specifically, please comment or go to my website michaelbreinig.com to privately message me. All the best to you... Even after everything that happened to me, the scammers are still trying. In this episode, I share three recent scam attempts that reached me through Facebook and text messages, proving that these criminals never stop looking for an opening. I explain why ignoring strangers online isn't rude—it's one of the most important decisions you can make to protect yourself and the people you love. I also talk about encouraging signs that governments and law enforcement are beginning to take romance scams more seriously.   I also introduce my new book: The Reality Behind Romance Scams: The Playbook, and reflect on what I've learned after speaking with dozens of victims and stepping into recovery and perhaps reinvention. One conversation in particular stayed with me—a young man who lost only $1,000, but lost everything that money represented. It reminded me once again that the true cost of a romance scam is measured in far more than dollars. If you're a victim, know that while a scam may forever change your life, it does not get to decide who you become next. Delete. Block. Walk. It really can save your future. This is an ongoing podcast series that explores the anatomy of modern romance scams and introduces practical tools designed to help you recognize, avoid, and recover from these crimes.  The AOM Framework™ Your Personal Rulebook — Gave a foundation for this, but please, build your own personal rules to recognize danger, make better decisions, and protect yourself before a scam ever takes hold.  Always validate. The Scammer's Playbook — Learn how scammers build trust, create dependency, and manipulate their victims. The Four S's — Secrecy. Silence. Shame. Seduction. The 15/30 Rule — Stop. Step back. Evaluate before you act. Pattern Recognition — Recognize where the scam is going before it gets there. DBW: Delete. Block. Walk. — Protect yourself. Walk away.  This is critical. Learn More: Books available to read, keep, or pass on. 📘 DING... "Hello Dear, Did You Miss Me?" https://a.co/d/0eaBEMlu  📗 The Reality Behind Romance Scams: The Playbook https://a.co/d/0aV7btcS 🌐 Website: michaelbauthor.com 🎥 Book Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tzbubG0gxfo If these episodes helped you, please follow, and share them with someone you care about, and help spread awareness. Until next time... Delete. Block. Walk. And al...

  8. Jul 14

    Episode 31 - The Anatomy of Modern Romance Scams | A Textbook Romance Scam - It Starts With a Single Text Message

    First of all, thank you for listening in. Hoping this helps individuals and families understand romance scams. If you have questions or want something to be discussed specifically, please comment or go to my website michaelbreinig.com to privately message me. All the best to you... Yesterday, I received a text message from someone named "Teresa Lee." At first glance, it looked harmless. A wrong number. A polite apology. A friendly conversation. But it wasn't harmless. It was a textbook example of how many modern romance scams and pig butchering scams begin. In this episode, I walk through the actual text exchange, explain the warning signs, and show how recognizing the scammer's playbook allowed me to do exactly what should be done.  Something I only wish I had the knowledge of this the first time.  Now, you have that knowledge. Knowledge acquired at a significant cost - is freely shared here. Delete. Block. Walk. If you've ever wondered how these scams REALLY begin, this episode provides a real-world example that happened just yesterday. If it helps one person recognize the pattern before becoming emotionally invested, then this episode has accomplished exactly what it was intended to do. Protect what is yours.  Stay safe... Resources 📘 Book 1: DING! "Hello Dear, How Are You?" https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0GK8P6TY3 🌐 Website: https://www.michaelbauthor.com 🎥 YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9d5kDcchOTw This is an ongoing podcast series that explores the anatomy of modern romance scams and introduces practical tools designed to help you recognize, avoid, and recover from these crimes.  The AOM Framework™ Your Personal Rulebook — Gave a foundation for this, but please, build your own personal rules to recognize danger, make better decisions, and protect yourself before a scam ever takes hold.  Always validate. The Scammer's Playbook — Learn how scammers build trust, create dependency, and manipulate their victims. The Four S's — Secrecy. Silence. Shame. Seduction. The 15/30 Rule — Stop. Step back. Evaluate before you act. Pattern Recognition — Recognize where the scam is going before it gets there. DBW: Delete. Block. Walk. — Protect yourself. Walk away.  This is critical. Learn More: Books available to read, keep, or pass on. 📘 DING... "Hello Dear, Did You Miss Me?" https://a.co/d/0eaBEMlu  📗 The Reality Behind Romance Scams: The Playbook https://a.co/d/0aV7btcS 🌐 Website: michaelbauthor.com 🎥 Book Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tzbubG0gxfo If these episodes helped you, please follow, and share them with someone you care about, and help spread awareness. Until next time... Delete. Block. Walk. And al...

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out of 5
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About

The Anatomy of Modern Romance Scams examines how long-term, attachment-driven deception operates beneath what are commonly called “romance scams.” These scams don’t begin with money—they begin with trust, emotional connection, and carefully constructed relationships that evolve over time. This series breaks down how those connections form, how trust is manipulated, and how the impact unfolds across emotional, relational, and financial dimensions. Based on lived experience and structured analysis, each episode focuses on a specific component of the process—helping listeners understand not just what happens, but how it happens. The goal is simple: increase awareness, restore clarity, and help strengthen prevention. For a deeper, firsthand account of how these scams unfold step by step, the book can now be found on Amazon.  Please search  "Ding — “Hello Dear, How Are You?”  

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