Grab an extra pillow. Actually, grab a few …. this week there's a waiting list outside the bedroom door. Jay-Jay Feeney and certified somatic sex and relationship coach Melissa Vranjes are back in bed together for one of the most requested (and most avoided) topics yet: group sex. It turns out this has quietly been one of Mel's ultimate fantasies all along, and once she's finally cornered into admitting it, the conversation goes places…. including her actual, very unplanned real-life experience, and Jay-Jay's confession that she's had not one, not two, but three threesomes. This episode is equal parts hilarious and genuinely useful. They dig into why the fantasy of "ten hot strangers" rarely survives contact with reality, what separates a threesome that's fun from one that quietly ends a relationship, and how jealousy shows up even when everyone agreed to the whole thing beforehand. They also get into the nuts and bolts nobody wants to ask about out loud: sexual health, testing, condom etiquette when there's more than two people involved, and what proper aftercare actually looks like once the night is over. In this episode: Why the fantasy version of group sex (control, safety, zero logistics) is nothing like the real thingMel's honest, cringe-and-all retelling of her one experience with multiple partners, and everything she'd do differentlyJay-Jay finally spills on her three threesomes, including the one that felt like a "tag team" and the one that didn'tThe difference between having a fantasy and actually wanting to live it outJealousy, the fear of loss underneath it, and why it can wreck a relationship even when everyone consented going inWhether it's easier to explore this single, in an open relationship, or with your long-term partnerHow to actually bring it up with a stranger, a partner, or at a bar without making it weirdWhat sex parties are really like (and how people actually find them)The one question you need to ask yourself before saying yes to anyone else's fantasy: why do I actually want this?Sexual health real talk … testing, condoms between partners, and having that conversation before things get goingAftercare for more than two: what it looks like, why it matters, and how simple it can beWhat "liberating" actually means here (hint: it's not about how wild you get) Whether group sex is a fantasy that's just for your own head, something you're curious to explore, or a story you've already got your own version of, this episode gives you the real talk, the pitfalls, and the tools to make it a good experience rather than a cautionary tale. ---------------------------------- How to Have Sex is a shame-free sex education podcast hosted by broadcaster Jay-Jay Feeney and certified sex and relationship coach Melissa Vranjes; one nosy, curious host and one expert who actually knows what she's talking about. Every episode tackles the stuff most of us were never taught, minus the awkward classroom diagrams. JOIN OUR COMMUNITY! Subscribe to our Substack: https://hthspodcast.substack.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/howtohavesexpodcast TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@howtohaves.pod Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/HowToHaveSexPodcast YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@Howtohavesexpodcast Email: howtohavesexpodcastnz@gmail.com Support the podcast: https://buymeacoffee.com/howtohavesex How to Have Sex is produced by PodLab, Auckland - https://www.podlab.co.nz HOSTS: Jay-Jay Feeney – Media Personality Instagram/TikTok: @JJFeeneyNZ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/JayJayFeeney Melissa Vranjes – Certified Somatic Sex & Relationship Coach www.melissavranjes.com Instagram: @melissavranjes Ready to feel more confident, connected, and turned on in your body? Join Sex School: https://www.melissavranjes.com/sex-school Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
