Holding It Together (Kinda)

Michael Mackniak, Esq
  • 0.0 (0)
  • Mental Health

Here we will get real in our conversations about Mental Illness and Caregiving, and the messy reality of keeping it all balanced.    No sugar-coating, no clinical jargon—just real talk about the hospitalizations, the medication battles, and the toll it takes on a home   This is for the parents, siblings, and partners who are doing the impossible every single day.  Holding It Together is a home for the overthinkers, the multitaskers, and anyone who feels like they’re one spilled coffee away from a meltdown. 

Episodes

  1. 1h ago

    A Daughter’s Guide To Dementia Care And Family Survival with Karmin Jenkins

    Silence is one of the cruelest parts of caregiving. When a parent has cancer, people show up with food and texts. When dementia or a mental health crisis blows up your family’s “normal,” the support often evaporates and you’re left holding the paperwork, the fear, and the grief that starts long before a funeral. We get into that reality with Karmen Jenkins, a retired licensed clinical social worker, military veteran, and life coach who has lived the daughter-to-caregiver role reversal firsthand. Karmen walks us through what long distance caregiving actually looks like, from coordinating doctors by phone to slowly taking over banking, appointments, and end-of-life planning. We talk about the moment distance stops being possible, the strain of moving a parent into your home, and how kids and spouses absorb the shock differently. She shares what helped her navigate services with limited resources, including starting with the Department of Social Services, connecting with aging agencies, and being honest about what you can and cannot afford. We also go deeper than logistics. We name the guilt, the marriage friction, the safety scares, and the disorienting grief of loving someone who is still here but no longer fully themselves. Karmen shares how community support can work when you ask for specific help, and why “holding it together kinda” is not failure, it is the human condition. If you’ve ever felt invisible as a caregiver, you’re not. Subscribe, share this with someone in the thick of it, and leave a review so more families can find these stories and practical tools. Get the Journal https://guardian-academy.thinkific.com/courses/CareKeeperJournal Join Our Group: Mental Health Resource Network: Mental Health Resource Network | CARE Coalition | Facebook    And become part of the Care Coalition: Serious Mental Illness Support | Care Coalition Homepage         On lIne Course https://guardian-academy.thinkific.com/   Featured Books by Michael Saving Melissa: 7Cs to Cure the Mental Health System https://www.amazon.com/Saving-Melissa-Mental-Health-System/dp/0997421401/ref=sr_1_4?crid=2M5UMT3SGX4F2&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.qTdx0uEZUvp8BB4cVx5nFF3asxtsbS9tk4J8iW1JOBTWeuKmhJNwn1ScqH9mM_KM3GhLBDHRQXsx5jLZVo9mUg.HidshKcNsUtePdlJzX2rEGe_jlxKyVCQiPmtAcygZh0&dib_tag=se&keywords=michael+mackniak&qid=1777383637&sprefix=mackniak%2Caps%2C305&sr=8-4   Character: Become the Person Your Social Media “Friends” Already Think You Are https://www.amazon.com/Character-Become-Person-Friends-Already/dp/1790810612/ref=sr_1_2?crid=2M5UMT3SGX4F2&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.qTdx0uEZUvp8BB4cVx5nFF3asxtsbS9tk4J8iW1JOBTWeuKmhJNwn1ScqH9mM_KM3GhLBDHRQXsx5jLZVo9mUg.HidshKcNsUtePdlJzX2rEGe_jlxKyVCQiPmtAcygZh0&dib_tag=se&keywords=michael+mackniak&qid=1777383719&sprefix=mackniak%2Caps%2C305&sr=8

    49 min
  2. The Cloak of Client Choice

    6d ago

    The Cloak of Client Choice

    A locked door, a hoarse voice saying “go away,” and a body on the brink of failure. We dive into the harrowing gray zone where autonomy meets danger and ask a hard question: when a mind is hijacked by illness, is “client choice” really a choice? Using Anne’s near-fatal refusal as the anchor, we unpack how good intentions and recovery-language can morph into paralysis, leaving providers frozen on porches while symptoms take the wheel. We bring multiple vantage points into focus: lawyers bound to advocate for expressed wishes, conservators obligated to act in a person’s best interest, clinicians weighing risk with incomplete information, and families caught between fear, hope, and burnout. Along the way, we trace larger system currents—deinstitutionalization without adequate funding, rigid protocols that prioritize liability over lives, and courts that often see only a moment in time instead of the full arc of a case. You’ll hear companion cases that sharpen the stakes: a woman spared frostbite only because of a house fire, a nursing-home resident who refused cataract surgery with clear capacity, and an emergency amputation avoided until a son’s presence shifted consent. What emerges is a practical, humane framework. Engagement is the pivot: stabilize first, invite voice next, and co-create plans the person can actually carry. History matters—patterns of decompensation, medication responses, and preferred supports should guide decisions, not just a hurried ER snapshot. We talk harm reduction, long-acting medications, creative supports, and exhaustive documentation to help teams align and judges see beyond the moment. And we stay honest about the gray: grave disability is debated, rights can clash with safety, and sometimes the kindest act is a firm no until the person, not the illness, can say yes. If you’ve ever stood at a threshold wondering whether to knock again or walk away, this conversation offers clarity, language, and tools to act with courage and care. Listen, share with someone who needs it, and leave a review to help more families and providers find their footing in the gray.

    1h 5m

  3. May 14

    An Off Switch For Neurospicy Brains with Danniel Worthen Cullumber

    Trauma doesn’t always arrive like a lightning strike. Sometimes it settles in, becomes routine, and starts shaping the way a whole household breathes, talks, sleeps, and copes. We sit down with Danniel Worthen Cullumber, MSW, LCSW of Willow Medela Wellness, a Utah trauma therapist and licensed clinical social worker, to name what that kind of trauma really is and why “just move on” is often the least helpful advice a family can hear. We get honest about the medical model and the ways it can unintentionally add stress: reactive care, inaccessible systems, endless portals and paperwork, and insurance-driven decisions that can delay support. Danielle shares how stigma around diagnoses, including autism spectrum disorder and broader neurodiversity, can shut doors and push families into workarounds that shouldn’t be necessary. We also dig into generational trauma, how stories and biology can carry fear forward, and why caregiver burnout is a predictable outcome when support is treated like a luxury. From there, we focus on what helps: trauma-informed care as a client-centered approach built on compassion, listening, and autonomy of choice. Danielle explains nervous system regulation and why people can “switch on” fast but struggle to switch off, especially after prolonged stress. She also breaks down Accelerated Resolution Therapy (ART), a bilateral eye-movement method related to EMDR that aims to change how the body responds to distressing memories and triggers. We close with a teaser on holistic work and paranormal experiences, and how to handle those conversations ethically without dismissing people or making it about the provider. If you’re a caregiver, clinician, or family member trying to keep it together, hit play, then subscribe, share this with someone who needs it, and leave a review so more people can find trauma-informed support. Get the Journal https://guardian-academy.thinkific.com/courses/CareKeeperJournal Join Our Group: Mental Health Resource Network: Mental Health Resource Network | CARE Coalition | Facebook    And become part of the Care Coalition: Serious Mental Illness Support | Care Coalition Homepage         On lIne Course https://guardian-academy.thinkific.com/   Featured Books by Michael Saving Melissa: 7Cs to Cure the Mental Health System https://www.amazon.com/Saving-Melissa-Mental-Health-System/dp/0997421401/ref=sr_1_4?crid=2M5UMT3SGX4F2&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.qTdx0uEZUvp8BB4cVx5nFF3asxtsbS9tk4J8iW1JOBTWeuKmhJNwn1ScqH9mM_KM3GhLBDHRQXsx5jLZVo9mUg.HidshKcNsUtePdlJzX2rEGe_jlxKyVCQiPmtAcygZh0&dib_tag=se&keywords=michael+mackniak&qid=1777383637&sprefix=mackniak%2Caps%2C305&sr=8-4   Character: Become the Person Your Social Media “Friends” Already Think You Are https://www.amazon.com/Character-Become-Person-Friends-Already/dp/1790810612/ref=sr_1_2?

    1 hr

  4. May 7

    The Kidz Are Alright (Kinda) with My Kids

    The kids are not confused about what they need. They’re tired of performing, tired of being reduced to a checklist, and tired of pretending the pressure isn’t real when the “social mirror” lives in their pockets 24/7. We sit down with five young people spanning ages 13 to 23 and ask the questions adults usually dodge: Do you feel watched at school? What kind of support actually helps? Is a mental health app enough when your chest is tight and your brain won’t shut off? You’ll hear how real friendship creates safety, why asking for help can feel harder than finding help, and how embarrassment, perfectionism, and fear of judgment show up in everyday moments. We also talk about teen mental health, youth mental health awareness, and the double-edged reality of social media and mental health, including how it can reduce stigma while fueling comparison. We go deeper into what schools and systems get wrong, from separating kids with specialized needs to skipping life skills that many students never learn at home. Faith shares what it’s like when professionals see a diagnosis on a screen instead of the whole person, and Jake reflects on the challenge of naming feelings as a young adult leader in the military. We end with a reminder that positive mental health is a daily practice, and that presence beats perfection every time. If this conversation hits home, subscribe, share it with a parent or educator, and leave a review so more families can find it. What’s one piece of “head trash” you want to clear out this week? Get the Journal https://guardian-academy.thinkific.com/courses/CareKeeperJournal Join Our Group: Mental Health Resource Network: Mental Health Resource Network | CARE Coalition | Facebook    And become part of the Care Coalition: Serious Mental Illness Support | Care Coalition Homepage         On lIne Course https://guardian-academy.thinkific.com/   Featured Books by Michael Saving Melissa: 7Cs to Cure the Mental Health System https://www.amazon.com/Saving-Melissa-Mental-Health-System/dp/0997421401/ref=sr_1_4?crid=2M5UMT3SGX4F2&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.qTdx0uEZUvp8BB4cVx5nFF3asxtsbS9tk4J8iW1JOBTWeuKmhJNwn1ScqH9mM_KM3GhLBDHRQXsx5jLZVo9mUg.HidshKcNsUtePdlJzX2rEGe_jlxKyVCQiPmtAcygZh0&dib_tag=se&keywords=michael+mackniak&qid=1777383637&sprefix=mackniak%2Caps%2C305&sr=8-4   Character: Become the Person Your Social Media “Friends” Already Think You Are https://www.amazon.com/Character-Become-Person-Friends-Already/dp/1790810612/ref=sr_1_2?crid=2M5UMT3SGX4F2&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.qTdx0uEZUvp8BB4cVx5nFF3asxtsbS9tk4J8iW1JOBTWeuKmhJNwn1ScqH9mM_KM3GhLBDHRQXsx5jLZVo9mUg.HidshKcNsUtePdlJzX2rEGe_jlxKyVCQiPmtAcygZh0&dib_tag=se&keywords=michael+mackniak&qid=1777383719&sprefix=mackniak%2Caps%2C305&sr=8-2

    1 hr

  5. May 1

    This Is What It Takes with Victoria Cuore

    Caregiving doesn’t just exhaust your schedule. It rewires your brain into a constant loop of meds, appointments, forms, and fear and then the system expects you to sound calm, concise, and “reasonable” on command. We’re done pretending that’s normal. Michael Mackniak sits down with Victoria Cuore, a domestic violence survivor, crisis advocate, and longtime caregiver, to lay out what real support looks like when mental illness, chronic illness, and complex care collide with a rushed medical system. We get specific about what changes outcomes in the moments that matter: crisis de-escalation that centers dignity, how to communicate when someone is dysregulated, and why “just sedate them” can hide the root problem instead of treating it. We also talk through the practical protections families need when loved ones turn 18 and suddenly caregivers are shut out including medical power of attorney, guardianship, conservatorship, and smarter documentation so clinicians actually hear the history that only family can provide. From laminated allergy cards to ER paperwork hacks to a caregiver journal that helps you track patterns and stay grounded, this conversation is built for real life. It’s also a launch point: we’re building the Mental Health Resource Network and the Care Coalition as a global collaboration hub so nobody has to white-knuckle their way through broken care coordination alone. If this helped, subscribe, share it with a caregiver friend, and leave a review so more families can find these tools when they need them most.

    55 min

  6. Apr 30

    Caregiver Grief And The Pain Of Loving Someone Who Changed with Dr. Joann Schaeffer, Author of The Unspoken Side of Grief

    Caregiving can break your heart in slow motion. When a loved one lives with dementia, schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, or chronic disease, you can find yourself mourning the person you knew while still making meds, appointments, and meals happen. That confusing mix of love, resentment, guilt, and exhaustion has a name, and naming it can be the first real relief. We sit down with Dr. Joanne Schaefer, MD, a board-certified family physician and healthcare leader who wrote a book on grief shaped by personal loss and roughly a hundred interviews. Together, we dig into ambiguous loss and prolonged grief, why caregivers often “grieve twice,” and why the grief during a long illness can feel heavier than what comes after death. We also talk about the emotion nobody wants to admit: the relief that can arrive when suffering ends, and the guilt that tries to follow it. From practical coping to practical support, we get specific. Dr. Schaefer shares research-backed tools like labeling emotions, journaling, and making the late-night to-do list that keeps your brain spinning. We also unpack what helps grieving families most, what not to say, and how friends can show up with real actions like meal trains, dog walks, laundry, and check-ins that continue months later, not just in the first week. If caregiver grief, caregiver burnout, or mental health stigma touches your life, listen, share this with someone who needs it, and then subscribe, leave a review, and tell us what kind of support actually makes a difference for you.

    47 min

  7. Apr 23

    6 Hospitals. 2 States. 9 Months

    A straight-A teenager with color-coded plans becomes a revolving door patient in six hospitals across two states in just nine months—and her family learns the hard way that the “safety net” often feels like a series of holes. We open the door on the front line of caregiving: 2 a.m. phone calls, ER chairs, and the emotional math of arguing for care in a system that speaks in acronyms and moves at the speed of insurance. Along the way, we unpack the practical moves that turn chaos into traction, from building airtight timelines to escalating when the first person can’t or won’t listen. You’ll meet our panel of long-time clinicians and advocates who have spent decades navigating inpatient psych, substance use complications, and the fragile handoffs between units, agencies, and states. We dig into why short stays can help or harm, what really drives the “stabilize and discharge” treadmill, and how families can create leverage without burning bridges. We talk openly about legal thresholds, commitment standards, and the maddening reality that a snapshot can outweigh a year of crisis data. And we share the tools we use—care journals, timelines, and targeted advocacy—to get the right care at the right level, faster. This is a story about a first episode, but it’s also a map for anyone who’s been told to start over, again. If you’re a parent, partner, or sibling holding it together while the world keeps turning, this conversation is for you.  Listen for grounded tactics, honest moments, and a reminder that progress is possible even when the machine glitches. If this helped you or someone you love, subscribe, share it with a caregiver who needs backup, and leave a review to help more families find us.

    55 min

  8. Apr 7

    MIGMA: Make Involuntary Guardianship Mandatory Again!! With Rebecca Iantuonni

    A policy can sound compassionate and still be dangerous when you read the fine print. We’re talking about Project Safe Harbor, a reported VA and DOJ partnership that would ramp up guardianship proceedings for certain veterans, including people who are homeless or at risk of homelessness. On paper it’s framed as “timely and appropriate care.” In practice, it risks turning a housing and services shortage into a civil liberties problem. I’m joined by attorney Rebecca Iantuonni, who has decades of experience around conservatorship, guardianship, disability planning, and the messy reality of mental health systems. Together, we break down the New York Times reporting and pull apart the biggest claim hiding in plain sight: homelessness does not equal incapacity. We dig into what guardianship actually is, how it differs from civil commitment, and why the idea that a guardian can simply force treatment, control visitors, and dictate where someone lives is both legally fraught and ethically loaded. We also ask the uncomfortable questions the policy invites. What counts as “no family,” and who decides? How do you determine someone can’t make health care decisions without real due process, real evidence, and respect for privacy? Why is the federal government trying to solve what is traditionally a state-law system, and what happens when a “narrow” program becomes a broad template for controlling other vulnerable groups? We end where the problem really lives: resources. If veterans are stuck in hospitals, it’s usually because there’s nowhere safe, affordable, and supportive to discharge them to. Guardianship can’t create beds, staffing, or supportive housing. If you care about homeless veterans, disability rights, and constitutional due process, this conversation will give you language, context, and a clear takeaway: support beats control. Subscribe to the podcast, share this with someone who works in health care or public policy, and leave a review if you want more episodes like this. Where do you draw the line between protection and coercion?

    54 min
  • 8 Episodes

About

Here we will get real in our conversations about Mental Illness and Caregiving, and the messy reality of keeping it all balanced.    No sugar-coating, no clinical jargon—just real talk about the hospitalizations, the medication battles, and the toll it takes on a home   This is for the parents, siblings, and partners who are doing the impossible every single day.  Holding It Together is a home for the overthinkers, the multitaskers, and anyone who feels like they’re one spilled coffee away from a meltdown. 

Information

  • Creator
    Michael Mackniak, Esq
  • Years Active
    2K
  • Episodes
    8
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © 2026 Holding It Together (Kinda)
  • Show Website
    Holding It Together (Kinda)