I'm Fine! - The Truth Behind the Smile

Jayne
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Exploring why caring people struggle to care for themselves and why we say "I'm fine" when we are not. Through expert conversations, the podcast supports listeners in overcoming compassion fatigue and rebuilding resilience. 

  1. 4d ago

    #26 Frances Alcock from Nurse to Funeral Director: Caring, Grief & the Courage to Change

    Jayne Ellis on I'm Fine - The Truth Behind the Smile welcomes Frances Alcock, an independent funeral director and former nurse, for an honest conversation about nursing, career change, grief, transferable skills, emotional resilience and finding the courage to do things differently. Frances spent 30 years in nursing, beginning in oncology before moving into district nursing, nurse practitioner roles and finally becoming a multiple sclerosis specialist nurse. She shares what drew her to community nursing, why she preferred working one to one with patients, and the pressures of a healthcare system stretched by staff shortages and limited resources. After retiring from nursing she took an unexpected new direction and founded her own independent funeral business, Opals, which she has now run for around 10 years. The catalyst was the funeral of her beloved uncle: feeling his life had not been properly represented, she began researching the industry and asking whether she could offer families something different. She talks openly about the journey from nurse to funeral director: training as a celebrant, overcoming her fear of public speaking, and learning to run a business from scratch. She explains why nurses have an extraordinary range of transferable skills, from listening and problem solving to managing teams, and reflects on the emotional parallels between nursing and funeral directing. Together, Jayne and Frances explore facing death from a young age, the patients and families who stay with you long after the working day ends, and why some losses hit hardest. Frances shares how she protects her wellbeing through exercise, friendships, walking, holidays and, increasingly, allowing herself proper time away from work. They also discuss the changing face of funeral directing, towards giving families the freedom to create a funeral that reflects the person they have lost. At the heart of it is a simple reminder: saying 'I'm fine' and putting on a smile isn't always enough. Frances's message to anyone considering a change is to think outside the box, because your skills may be more transferable than you realise. Connect with Frances: https://www.linkedin.com/in/frances-alcock-b9b656109/ Find out more about Opals Funerals: https://www.opalsfunerals.co.uk/ Follow Opals on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/opalsfunerals/ EF training exists because nobody should have to pour from an empty cup, founded by Jayne Ellis who learnt the hard way so you don't have to. Subscribe, share and leave a review to help more caring professionals find us. To be a guest, or just to say hello, reach us at info@eftraining.co.uk Learn more about Jayne Ellis and our Compassion Fatigue and Emotional Resilience training at http://eftraining.co.uk Content note: this episode discusses death, dying, bereavement and funeral directing, which some listeners may find upsetting. This podcast is for education and support only and is not a substitute for professional mental health care. If you are struggling, please contact a qualified professional or your GP. Views expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect those of EF training Ltd. Guest content is shared in the spirit of open, honest conversation.

  2. Sep 30

    #25 Poppy Mardall Breaking Taboo Around Death: Compassion, Boundaries and Looking After Yourself

    What happens when your job is to care for people at one of the hardest moments of their lives? In this powerful episode of I'm Fine - The Truth Behind the Smile, Jayne Ellis is joined by Poppy Mardall, founder of Poppy's Funeral Directors in London, for an honest conversation about death, grief, compassion and boundaries. Poppy came to funeral directing from the art world, driven to do things differently after seeing poor standards of care in the sector. What began as a wish to give grieving families better care has grown into a team dedicated to helping people feel 'held and heard'. She is honest about the toll of such demanding work, and says her biggest lesson has been learning to look after herself. In the early days she gave everything, on call through the night and driving paperwork across London, until she realised that approach wasn't sustainable. Together, Jayne and Poppy explore boundaries, why caring professions make it so hard to recognise our own needs, why we should talk more openly about death, and the rituals that help us process loss. Poppy shares how swimming, walking and her support network keep her well, and why looking after yourself isn't selfish, it's what makes sustainable care possible. Find out more about Poppy's Funeral Directors: https://www.poppysfunerals.co.uk/ Connect with Poppy here: https://www.linkedin.com/in/poppy-mardall-b1215117/ and on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/poppy_mardall/ You can also follow Poppy's Funerals on social media: https://www.instagram.com/poppysfunerals/ https://www.facebook.com/poppysfunerals https://www.linkedin.com/company/poppy-s-funerals/ EF training exists because nobody should have to pour from an empty cup. Founded by Jayne Ellis who learnt the hard way so you don't have to. If today's conversation resonated with you, please subscribe, share and leave a review - it helps more professionals who care find this community. If you or someone you know would like to join the conversation and be a guest on our podcast, please get in touch. Connect with us at info@eftraining.co.uk Visit us at http://eftraining.co.uk for more information about Jayne Ellis and learn about our Compassion Fatigue and Emotional Resilience Training for Organisations and Individuals. Content note: This episode discusses death, dying, bereavement and funeral directing. Some listeners may find these subjects difficult or upsetting. Please note: This podcast is intended for education and supportive purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health support. If you are struggling, please reach out to a qualified professional or contact your GP. The views and opinions expressed by guests on this podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views, values or position of EF training Ltd. Guest content is shared in the spirit of open conversation, learning and intended as a safe space for honest dialogue.

  3. Sep 23

    #24 Adrian Blake: ADHD, Belonging & Creating Spaces Where People Can Thrive

    Jayne Ellis on I'm Fine, The Truth Behind the Smile welcomes educator, coach and award-winning school leader Adrian Blake for a personal conversation about neurodivergence, inclusion, identity and creating environments where people can be themselves. Adrian shares an unexpected journey from wanting to join the army, through acting, into education and school leadership. Having had to engage with Educational Psychologists from primary school, he was eventually diagnosed with ADHD in his early twenties, and he reflects on growing up in a system that didn't understand neurodivergence, and how the right environments, structure and opportunities helped him thrive. From Headteacher of ArtsEd to using his experience as a Master Practitioner Coach with the EMCC to coach neurodivergent young people, Adrian explains why what holds people back often isn't their dyslexia, ADHD, dyspraxia or autism, but how they feel about themselves. He talks openly about being labelled and misunderstood at school, the toll of masking, and why performing arts can be such a powerful home for neurodivergent young people, where creativity and individuality become strengths rather than things to hide. Together, Jayne and Adrian discuss what parents should look for when choosing a school, why happiness and learning how to learn matter as much as academic results, and how to create genuinely neurodivergent-friendly workplaces through psychological safety, flexibility and space for creativity, recognising that progress doesn't always happen in a straight line. Jayne asks the question at the heart of the podcast: how does someone who spends his time supporting others look after himself? Adrian's answer is revealing: family, martial arts, exercise and purpose, and he reflects on why every organisation is, at its heart, a people organisation. Perhaps the most powerful moment comes when he explains that at ArtsEd, people knew that 'I'm fine' rarely meant 'I'm fine'. An uplifting, thought-provoking conversation about what happens when we stop trying to make people fit the system and start creating systems that let people thrive. A must-listen for parents, educators, leaders, employers and anyone who wants to understand what it really means to create belonging. Connect with Adrian: https://www.linkedin.com/in/adrian-blake-5bb06560/ EF training exists because nobody should have to pour from an empty cup, founded by Jayne Ellis who learnt the hard way so you don't have to. Subscribe, share and leave a review to help more caring professionals find us. To be a guest, or just to say hello, reach us at info@eftraining.co.uk Learn more about Jayne Ellis and our Compassion Fatigue and Emotional Resilience training at http://eftraining.co.uk This podcast is for education and support only and is not a substitute for professional mental health care. If you are struggling, please contact a qualified professional or your GP. Views expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect those of EF training Ltd. Guest content is shared in the spirit of open, honest conversation.

  4. Sep 16

    #23 Charlotte Evans from Nurse to Coach: Burnout, Self-Care & Saying “I’m Not Fine”

    Jayne Ellis on I'm Fine - The Truth Behind the Smile welcomes nurse and clinical coach Charlotte Evans for an honest and inspiring conversation about career change, caring for others, burnout and what happens when saying 'I'm fine' becomes a way of hiding how we really feel. Charlotte shares her career journey from nursing in Switzerland and pharmaceutical market research to becoming an entrepreneur, running a home care business and eventually returning to healthcare, discovering along the way that her caring nature could be used in many ways and that being a nurse didn't have to define her entire career. Now working as a clinical coach, she supports patients to better self-manage their health, navigate barriers within the healthcare system, build confidence and take action, and explains why simply listening and making someone feel heard can matter as much as practical guidance. She also opens up about the emotional toll of caring for others, and the pressure healthcare and social care professionals put on themselves to be strong, resilient and dependable, made even harder when working remotely. Charlotte shares her own experience of burnout, including the physical symptoms she had before recognising what was really happening. A book from her sister, Healing Back Pain: The Mind-Body Connection by John Sarno, helped her understand the link between stress and physical symptoms and became a turning point in how she viewed vulnerability. Together, Jayne and Charlotte explore why healthcare professionals can find it so difficult to ask for help, why we don't want to be seen as the person who isn't coping, and why being vulnerable isn't a weakness; it can be a source of strength. Charlotte also shares how she looks after herself now, including reading, yoga, guided meditation and personal growth. Her advice for anyone entering a caring profession is simple but powerful: notice how you're feeling, find the words to describe it, don't mask it and be true to yourself. A powerful reminder that the people who spend their lives caring for others need to care for themselves too, and that there is only one you, so be you. Connect with Charlotte: https://www.linkedin.com/in/charlotte-evans-575a1029/ Guided Meditation App: https://apps.apple.com/gb/app/yoga-with-lisa/id6587581227 EF training exists because nobody should have to pour from an empty cup. Founded by Jayne Ellis, who learnt the hard way so you don't have to. If today's conversation resonated with you, please subscribe, share and leave a review - it helps more professionals who care find this community. If you or someone you know would like to join the conversation and be a guest on our podcast, please get in touch. Connect with us at info@eftraining.co.uk Visit us at http://eftraining.co.uk for more information about Jayne Ellis and learn about our Compassion Fatigue and Emotional Resilience Training for Organisations and Individuals. Please note: This podcast is intended for education and supportive purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health support. If you are struggling, please reach out to a qualified professional or contact your GP. The views and opinions expressed by guests on this podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views, values or position of EF training Ltd. Guest content is shared in the spirit of open conversation, learning and intended as a safe space for honest dialogue.

  5. Sep 9

    #22 Silvia Freeman: Why Knowing About Stress Isn't Enough - Wellbeing Starts with You

    What if managing stress wasn't about simply coping better, but about learning how your mind and body actually work? In this episode of I'm Fine - The Truth Behind the Smile, Jayne is joined by Silvia Freeman, a health and wellbeing consultant who helps organisations move beyond simply talking about stress and instead teaches practical techniques that help people regulate their emotions, calm their nervous systems and prevent burnout before it takes hold. Silvia shares her own journey from an administrative career into wellbeing leadership at Network Rail, where a personal experience with therapy and emotional healing sparked a passion for supporting others. Starting as one of the organisation's first Wellbeing Champions, she developed innovative wellbeing programmes that introduced breathwork, Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) tapping and Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) to teams across the UK. Together, Jayne and Silvia explore why so many workplace wellbeing initiatives remain reactive rather than preventative, and why simply telling people about stress is rarely enough. Instead, Silvia explains the importance of giving people practical tools they can use every day to regulate anxiety, improve focus and build emotional resilience. The conversation also tackles the challenges of encouraging organisations and leaders to invest in wellbeing before problems become crises. Silvia explains why science, experience and consistency are all essential in helping leaders understand that healthier, emotionally regulated employees are not only happier, but also more productive and engaged. Finally, Silvia reflects on the importance of practising what she teaches. From daily mindfulness and breathwork to EFT tapping, walking and dancing, she shares the non-negotiable habits that help her stay emotionally well while supporting others. This episode is a refreshing reminder that emotional wellbeing isn't something we find once we've burnt out; it's something we build through small, consistent practices every day. Connect with Silvia here: https://www.linkedin.com/in/silvia-freeman-wellbeingfacilitator/ EF training exists because nobody should have to pour from an empty cup. Founded by Jayne Ellis who learnt the hard way so you don't have to. If today's conversation resonated with you, please subscribe, share and leave a review - it helps more professionals who care find this community. If you or someone you know would like to join the conversation and be a guest on our podcast, please get in touch. Connect with us at info@eftraining.co.uk Visit us at http://eftraining.co.uk for more information about Jayne Ellis and learn about our Compassion Fatigue and Emotional Resilience Training for Organisations and Individuals. Please note: This podcast is intended for education and supportive purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health support. If you are struggling, please reach out to a qualified professional or contact your GP. The views and opinions expressed by guests on this podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views, values or position of EF training Ltd. Guest content is shared in the spirit of open conversation, learning and intended as a safe space for honest dialogue.

  6. Sep 2

    #21 Kate and Sharon: Compassion Under Pressure - What It Really Takes to Be a Vet

    What happens when the people caring for our beloved pets are quietly carrying the emotional weight of everyone else's worries? In this episode of I'm Fine - The Truth Behind the Smile, Jayne is joined by Kate and Sharon, directors of Mulberry House Vets, to explore the hidden emotional realities of veterinary practice. Between them, they have decades of experience as a veterinary surgeon, veterinary nurse and practice leaders, giving a unique insight into one of the most rewarding, but emotionally demanding, professions. Kate reflects on always knowing she wanted to be a vet and how a supportive mentor early in her career made all the difference. She discusses how the profession has changed over the past two decades, with rising client expectations, social media scrutiny and perfectionism creating a far more challenging environment for today's graduates. Sharon shares her journey from veterinary nursing into management and practice ownership, describing the long hours, relentless demands and emotional exhaustion that once led her to step away from clinical practice. Together, they explain why resilience alone isn't enough and why psychologically safe workplaces have become essential. The conversation explores how Mulberry House Vets has built a culture where mistakes are treated as learning opportunities, leaders remain visible and approachable, and staff speak openly before stress becomes burnout. Rather than simply having an "open door policy," Kate and Sharon explain what it takes to genuinely live those values every day. Jayne also explores the changing landscape of the profession, including the growing number of women entering the industry, the importance of flexible working, and why talking openly about mental health is helping change a profession that once expected people to simply "get on with it." Finally, Kate and Sharon share how they protect their own wellbeing. Sharon returns to horse riding to disconnect and reset, while Kate finds balance through running, being outdoors, time by the sea and laughter with close friends. Both agree that looking after yourself isn't a luxury. It's what allows you to continue caring for others. This is an honest conversation about compassion, leadership, resilience and why supporting the people behind the profession ultimately benefits everyone, including the animals they care for. Connect with Sharon here: https://www.linkedin.com/in/sharon-tongue-2a259849/ Find out more here: https://www.mulberryhousevets.co.uk EF training Ltd exists because nobody should have to pour from an empty cup. Founded by Jayne Ellis, who learnt the hard way so you don't have to. If today's conversation resonated with you, please subscribe, share and leave a review. It helps more professionals who care find this community. If you or someone you know would like to be a guest on our podcast, please get in touch at info@eftraining.co.uk. Visit us at https://eftraining.co.uk to learn about our Compassion Fatigue and Emotional Resilience Training for Organisations and Individuals. Please note: This podcast is for education and supportive purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health support. If you are struggling, please reach out to a qualified professional or contact your GP. The views expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views, values or position of EF training Ltd.

  7. Aug 26

    #20 Nick Witan: Beyond Just Care - Creating a Life Worth Living

    What does great care really look like? This week, Jayne is joined by Nick Witan, founder of the 'Just Care' Campaign and host of the 'Just Care' Podcast, for a thoughtful conversation about why care should mean far more than simply meeting people's basic needs. Nick shares how he unexpectedly found his calling in health and social care and why, after more than 17 years in the sector, he believes it's time for a fundamental shift in how we think about support. Together, he and Jayne explore the difference between helping people survive and helping them truly live. They discuss why genuine independence comes from doing with people rather than doing for them, how meaningful relationships transform care, and why quality of life should never be viewed as an optional extra. The conversation also turns to the emotional reality of working in caring professions. Nick speaks openly about the anxiety he has experienced during his career, the lack of proactive emotional support available for frontline staff, and why so many dedicated professionals quietly put everyone else's needs before their own. Together they explore: • why relationships are at the heart of exceptional care • the hidden emotional toll of supporting vulnerable people • why staff wellbeing directly affects the quality of care people receive • the importance of Positive Behaviour Support (PBS) • why "good enough" should never be the ambition in health and social care • how simple daily acts of self-care can prevent us from running on empty This is an honest and inspiring conversation about compassion, leadership, purpose and the responsibility we all have to create lives filled with meaning, not simply safety. If you've ever worked in health or social care, supported a loved one, or wondered what truly person-centred care should look like, this episode is full of insight, hope and practical wisdom. EF training Ltd exists because nobody should have to pour from an empty cup. Founded by Jayne Ellis, who learnt the hard way so you don't have to. Connect with Nick here: https://www.linkedin.com/in/nick-witan%F0%9F%92%A1-aa5698313/ Listen to Nick's 'Just Care' Podcast here: https://open.spotify.com/show/033uW3PKYIjbSlfGB6uDoF If today's conversation resonated with you, please subscribe, share and leave a review. It helps more professionals who care find this community. If you or someone you know would like to be a guest on our podcast, please get in touch at info@eftraining.co.uk. Visit us at http://eftraining.co.uk to learn about our Compassion Fatigue and Emotional Resilience Training for Organisations and Individuals. Please note: This podcast is intended for education and supportive purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health support. If you are struggling, please reach out to a qualified professional or contact your GP. The views expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views, values or position of EF training Ltd. Guest content is shared in the spirit of open conversation and learning.

  8. Aug 19

    #19 Cait Donovan: Burnout, Boundaries & Why We Don't See It Coming

    Burnout expert, author and host of Fried: The Burnout Podcast, Cait Donovan joins Jayne for a fascinating conversation about why so many caring, high-achieving people don't realise they're burning out until their minds and bodies force them to stop. Cait shares her extraordinary journey from training as an acupuncturist, building thriving practices across Europe, and experiencing severe burnout herself, to becoming one of the world's leading voices on burnout prevention and workplace wellbeing. Together, Jayne and Cait explore the hidden links between childhood experiences, helping professions and perfectionism, why compassion fatigue and burnout can be so difficult to recognise in ourselves, and the fascinating neuroscience behind why some of us genuinely don't notice the warning signs. They discuss: • why high achievers often believe burnout happens to "other people" • the connection between adverse childhood experiences (ACEs) and caring professions • compassion fatigue, burnout and emotional exhaustion • why boundaries matter more than balance • how resentment can become one of our most valuable emotional signals • what leaders can do to create healthier workplaces • and the practical steps that helped Cait recover and build a life that's no longer driven by self-neglect. This is an honest, insightful conversation that blends science, lived experience and compassion, reminding us that saying "I'm fine" is often the beginning of a much bigger story. Connect with Cait here: https://www.linkedin.com/in/caitdonovanspeaks/ Find out more about Cait and how she supports here: https://caitdonovan.com/ Listen to Cait's podcast, 'Fried: The Burnout Podcast' here: https://caitdonovan.com/podcast EF training exists because nobody should have to pour from an empty cup. Founded by Jayne Ellis who learnt the hard way so you don't have to. If today's conversation resonated with you, please subscribe, share and leave a review. It helps more professionals who care find this community. If you or someone you know would like to join the conversation and be a guest on our podcast, please get in touch. Connect with us at info@eftraining.co.uk Visit us at http://eftraining.co.uk for more information about Jayne Ellis and learn about our Compassion Fatigue and Emotional Resilience Training for Organisations and Individuals. Please note: This podcast is intended for education and supportive purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health support. If you are struggling, please reach out to a qualified professional or contact your GP. The views and opinions expressed by guests on this podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views, values or position of EF training Ltd. Guest content is shared in the spirit of open conversation, learning and intended as a safe space for honest dialogue.

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Exploring why caring people struggle to care for themselves and why we say "I'm fine" when we are not. Through expert conversations, the podcast supports listeners in overcoming compassion fatigue and rebuilding resilience. 

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