Seen by Birkman

Amy Shepley and Torri Olanski

You know that moment when someone names something about you that you’ve never had words for… and suddenly, you feel seen. Not in a way that’s flattering or critical. Just really… real. That’s what this podcast is about. On Seen by Birkman, hosts Amy Shepley and Torri Olanski explore real stories, practical applications, and honest conversations about what it actually looks like to be understood through the power of perception. Each episode dives into the patterns behind behavior and how greater awareness can transform the way we work, lead, and relate to each other.

Episodes

  1. Jul 28

    The Problem With Conflict

    Conflict isn't usually the problem. In this episode, Amy and Torri explore why so much conflict at work, at home, and in our relationships begins with a simple misunderstanding: we assume other people see the world the way we do. They unpack why two well-intentioned people can experience the exact same situation in completely different ways, how hidden personality differences shape our reactions, and why trying to eliminate conflict often creates even bigger problems. Rather than seeing conflict as something to avoid, they argue that healthy conflict—paired with curiosity and understanding—is one of the most powerful drivers of trust, innovation, and stronger relationships. Key Moments -  Why most conflict starts with different perceptions, not bad intentions. -  The hidden assumptions that damage relationships. -  How different personality needs create completely different experiences of the same conversation. -  Why curiosity is more powerful than certainty. -  The difference between destructive conflict and productive tension. -  How understanding another person's perspective can completely change the conversation. Timestamps 6:13 - Why tension between teams is actually healthy 17:12 - The leader's real job: managing tension 30:13 - Why 99% of conflict is a misunderstanding 38:24 - Why productive conflict drives innovation 49:56 - Stop trying to eliminate conflict 1:03:11 - The question that changes every conflict Episode Links: Barry Johnson Ph.D., Polarity Management: Identifying and Managing Unsolvable Problems: https://www.amazon.com/Polarity-Management-Identifying-Managing-Unsolvable/dp/0874251761

  2. Jul 14

    The Hidden World of Needs: Part 2

    In Part 2 of this conversation on Needs, Amy and Torri explore what happens after we become aware of our Needs. They discuss why unmet Needs create discomfort, how the stories we attach to them create unnecessary suffering, and how greater self-awareness can lead to more freedom, healthier relationships, and a deeper appreciation for who we are. Rather than trying to eliminate our Needs, they explore how accepting them, advocating for them, and loosening our attachment to unmet expectations can change the way we experience work, leadership, and everyday life. Key Moments - Part 2 explores the deeper emotional and personal side of Needs. - Unmet Needs create discomfort, but the stories we attach to them often create the greatest suffering. - Awareness is only the beginning. Growth comes through appreciation, communication, and practice. - Letting go of attachment does not mean ignoring your Needs or pretending they do not matter. - Understanding your reactions can become a powerful tool for self-awareness. - Loving your Needs instead of judging them can change your relationship with yourself and others. Timestamps 01:33 - When Needs become more than a workplace tool 06:02 - Are we becoming attached to our Needs? 11:29 - The stages of growth with Birkman Needs 20:44 - The story we tell ourselves when Needs go unmet 30:11 - Feeling discomfort without adding more suffering 35:13 - Why we notice others' flaws before our own 39:08 - Learning to appreciate your Needs instead of fighting them 45:00 - Why this conversation is the future of work

  3. Jun 30

    The Hidden World of Needs: Part 1

    Needs are one of the most powerful and misunderstood parts of Birkman. In this episode, Amy and Torri begin a two-part conversation on what Needs are, why they matter, and how they shape the way people experience work, relationships, and themselves. They explore the difference between what people show on the outside and what they need on the inside. From Assertiveness to Social Energy to Emotional Energy, they unpack why people can look one way but need something very different from their environment. They also address common misunderstandings: Needs are not "needy", illogical, or a weakness. They are part of a person’s internal wiring. When people understand and communicate their Needs with awareness, they can move from frustration and reactivity toward healthier relationships, stronger teams, and more productive work. Key Moments Needs are the hidden layer that makes Birkman different.Usual Behavior shows how someone operates but Needs reveal what helps them stay productive.People often assume others need the same things they do, which creates confusion and conflict.Needs are not excuses or demands. They are information.When Needs are unmet over time, people are more likely to move into distress.Understanding Needs can help people feel seen, respected, and better equipped to manage themselves. Timestamps 04:55 - What Needs are and how they differ from Usual Behavior 07:27 - Why everyone has a different internal roadmap 12:24 - Examples of Needs in the workplace 19:28 - How unmet Needs can lead to Distress 31:31 - Common reactions when people first learn their Needs 46:17 - How Needs can shift from empowerment to entitlement 57:12 - Practical ways to use Needs information 1:01:52 - Amy and Torri reflect on their own Needs

  4. Jun 16

    The Ideal Leader Profile

    What makes a great leader?Many organizations search for the perfect leadership profile, hoping to reduce risk and predict success. In this episode, Amy and Torri explore why that profile does not exist and why leadership is far more complex than personality alone.They discuss the hidden risks of hiring for a specific type, the value of diverse perspectives, and why leadership should be viewed as an ongoing practice rather than a title. Along the way, they unpack how self-awareness, emotional intelligence, trust, and development shape effective leaders in a world that is becoming more uncertain and rapidly changing.The conversation also explores how Birkman can support leadership development, not by identifying who will succeed, but by helping leaders understand their strengths, blind spots, and opportunities for growth.Key Takeaways- There is no single personality profile that predicts leadership success.- Hiring leaders who think alike can create organizational blind spots and increase risk.- Leadership is a practice built through development, experience, and self-awareness.- Great leaders create purpose, clarity, psychological safety, and opportunities for growth.- Birkman is most valuable as a leadership development tool, not a leadership selection tool.- Diverse perspectives strengthen decision-making and help organizations adapt to change.Timestamps02:06 – Why there is no profile for a great leader06:36 – The hidden risk of hiring the same type of leader repeatedly11:28 – Leadership as a practice, not a personality type20:20 – The five core responsibilities of effective leaders27:34 – Real examples of leadership that builds trust and loyalty37:01 – How Birkman supports leadership development48:11 – The mindset shift: Am I practicing leadership?

  5. Jun 2

    What AI Can't Replace

    Have you noticed that everyone is starting to sound the same? As AI becomes part of everyday work, communication is becoming faster, more polished, and in some cases, more uniform. In this episode, Amy and Torri explore what happens when technology begins to shape the way we express ourselves. They discuss why AI naturally gravitates toward the average, how personality creates trust and connection, and why our differences may become even more valuable in the future. They also examine the deeper challenge beneath the technology itself: the temptation to outsource our thinking, creativity, and self-expression. The conversation is an invitation to use AI as a tool while staying connected to the perspectives, experiences, and personality that make us uniquely human. Key Takeaways AI naturally trends toward average communication patterns.Personality plays a critical role in building trust and connection.Differences in perspective become more valuable as technology becomes more capable.Psychological safety and vulnerability remain essential for innovation.AI is most effective when it enhances human thinking rather than replacing it.Authenticity becomes a competitive advantage in an increasingly automated world. Timestamps 00:00 - Why everyone is starting to sound the same 07:09 - How AI develops a communication style 14:45 - The risk of losing personality in our work 18:26 - What vulnerability and psychological safety have to do with AI 25:32 - Why your differences matter more than ever 37:29 - The business impact of losing diverse perspectives 46:01 - How to use AI without losing your voice Episode Links: Who are you, ChatGPT? Personality and Demographic Style in LLM-Generated Content Dana Sotto Porat* , Ella RabinovichSusan Cain, The power of introvertsBrené Brown, The power of vulnerability Amy Edmonson, Building a psychologically safe workplace

  6. May 19

    Retaking the Birkman — Respecting Your Original Lens

    Should you retake the Birkman? It is one of the most common questions people ask after seeing their results, especially when they feel like they have changed, grown, or entered a new season of life.In this episode, Amy and Torri unpack why Birkman results are designed to remain stable, even when your context, behavior, relationships, or self-awareness shift. Through the metaphor of trees, they explore the difference between changing who you are and transforming into the healthiest version of who you have always been.They also address the deeper emotional layer behind wanting a new result: shame, discomfort, or the hope that growth will “show up” as a different score. Instead, they invite listeners to give their first Birkman a second look and consider that acceptance—not reinvention—may be the beginning of real transformation.Key Takeaways Birkman measures enduring perception, not temporary mood or current circumstances.Your context can change how you feel and show up without changing your underlying lens.Growth does not always mean becoming different; sometimes it means managing your lens more intentionally.Wanting to retake the Birkman can sometimes point to shame or discomfort with what the first report revealed.The goal is not to become a different “tree,” but to become the healthiest version of the one you are.Self-acceptance makes it easier to understand and accept others.Timestamps 00:36 - The most common Birkman question: should people retake it?03:27 - Why personality is stable, not static06:19 - Why retaking the assessment can reduce validity07:47 - How context changes the way your Birkman feels15:42 - When growth makes people want a new result21:44 - When people do not like what their Birkman says34:41 - Giving your first Birkman a second look

  7. May 5

    Welcome to Seen by Birkman

    Feeling seen is not a luxury. It is a fundamental human need rooted in biology, belonging, and survival. In the first episode of Seen by Birkman, Amy and Torri define what it means to be seen and why this need shows up so strongly in relationships, leadership, and work. They explore how Birkman helps make invisible perceptions visible, and why understanding alone is not enough. Through personal stories, workplace examples, and the framework of understanding, empathy, and action, this episode shows how feeling seen becomes something people co-create through curiosity, vulnerability, and care. In a world shaped by loneliness, speed, and AI, the ability to see and understand people may be one of our most necessary human skills. Key Takeaways Feeling seen is a biological need tied to safety, not just emotion. Most conflict comes from misinterpreting someone else’s perspective.Understanding someone’s inner world requires curiosity, not assumption.Feeling seen is co-created through vulnerability and intention. Small actions, not big gestures, are what make people feel they matter. Timestamps 00:43 - Defining what it means to feel seen 01:53 - Why the need to be seen is ancient and biological 06:21 - Why humanness matters more in the age of AI 13:09 - The framework: understanding, empathy, and action 21:21 - Personal stories of feeling seen through Birkman 32:02 - Why curiosity is the antidote to assumptions 38:47 - Practical ways to help others feel seen

  • 7 Episodes

Ratings & Reviews

5
out of 5
5 Ratings

About

You know that moment when someone names something about you that you’ve never had words for… and suddenly, you feel seen. Not in a way that’s flattering or critical. Just really… real. That’s what this podcast is about. On Seen by Birkman, hosts Amy Shepley and Torri Olanski explore real stories, practical applications, and honest conversations about what it actually looks like to be understood through the power of perception. Each episode dives into the patterns behind behavior and how greater awareness can transform the way we work, lead, and relate to each other.

Information

  • Creator
    Amy Shepley and Torri Olanski
  • Years Active
    2026
  • Episodes
    7
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © Amy Shepley and Torri Olanski
  • Show Website
    Seen by Birkman

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