This Is Insanity

Jonathan Solomon
  • 5.0 (2)
  • Christianity
  • Biweekly

Some albums are made to be heard. This one was made to be survived and felt. This Is Insanity is a 17-episode limited series where Jonathan Solomon goes track by track through his album “Allegory Of Insanity” — unpacking the faith, the tension, and the internal war that made each song necessary. The album is about being a Christian who struggles with sexual attraction. The podcast is about everything that didn't fit in the lyrics. No easy answers. Just one person's honest conversation with God, with himself, and now — with you. New episodes dropping twice a week.

  1. Sep 4

    Perplexed Pt. 2 (with Cammie Hodge)

    In this episode of This Is Insanity, we unpack “Perplexed” — a song about what happens when the people you look to for spiritual clarity refuse to be clear. For Christians wrestling with same-sex attraction, questions about sexuality aren't theoretical. They touch obedience, relationships, identity, sacrifice, and what faithfulness to Jesus will actually require. Yet sometimes the pastors we trust most can seem hesitant, elusive, or deliberately vague about what they believe. And that ambiguity can be deeply confusing. “Perplexed” explores what it's like to desperately want to follow Jesus while wondering whether your spiritual leaders actually believe the convictions you're sacrificing to obey. When sermons carefully avoid the question, conversations produce unclear answers, and different audiences seem to hear different things, you can begin wondering: Am I taking this more seriously than I need to? Have I misunderstood Scripture? Why am I fighting so hard if no one will plainly tell me what they believe? This episode isn't a demand for pastors to speak without compassion or nuance. It's a plea to recognize that clarity itself can be an act of pastoral care. Join us as we discuss same-sex attraction, theological ambiguity, and the difficult experience of trying to walk faithfully when the voices meant to shepherd you leave you perplexed.

  2. Sep 1

    Perplexed Pt. 1 (with Cammie Hodge)

    In this episode of This Is Insanity, we unpack “Perplexed” — a song about what happens when the people you look to for spiritual clarity refuse to be clear. For Christians wrestling with same-sex attraction, questions about sexuality aren't theoretical. They touch obedience, relationships, identity, sacrifice, and what faithfulness to Jesus will actually require. Yet sometimes the pastors we trust most can seem hesitant, elusive, or deliberately vague about what they believe. And that ambiguity can be deeply confusing. “Perplexed” explores what it's like to desperately want to follow Jesus while wondering whether your spiritual leaders actually believe the convictions you're sacrificing to obey. When sermons carefully avoid the question, conversations produce unclear answers, and different audiences seem to hear different things, you can begin wondering: Am I taking this more seriously than I need to? Have I misunderstood Scripture? Why am I fighting so hard if no one will plainly tell me what they believe? This episode isn't a demand for pastors to speak without compassion or nuance. It's a plea to recognize that clarity itself can be an act of pastoral care. Join us as we discuss same-sex attraction, theological ambiguity, and the difficult experience of trying to walk faithfully when the voices meant to shepherd you leave you perplexed.

  3. Aug 28

    Echoes Of Yesterday Pt. 2 (with Cammie Hodge and Hezekiah Cunningham-Bey)

    In this episode of This Is Insanity, we unpack “Echoes of Yesterday” — a song about what happens when the wounds of our past begin shaping what we believe about God in the present. For some people, conversations about sexuality don't begin with theology. They begin much earlier—with rejection, abandonment, abuse, loneliness, disappointment, or prayers that seemed to go unanswered. And eventually, those experiences can leave behind a difficult question: If God cared about me, where was He then? And if He didn't seem to care about what happened to me then, why should I trust what He says about my sexuality now? This episode makes room for that question. “Echoes of Yesterday” explores how our histories can become echoes that follow us into our understanding of God. We talk honestly about the ways pain can distort our view of His character, why simply giving someone the “right answer” about sexuality may fail to address the deeper wounds underneath their questions, and why difficult conversations about the past can be an important part of learning to trust God again. The song doesn't offer easy explanations for suffering or pretend that every wound can be neatly resolved. Instead, it asks whether the God who seemed absent in our darkest moments might have been nearer than we understood—and whether His love can be trusted even in the places where we still have questions. Join us as we discuss brokenness, sexuality, suffering, trust, and the echoes of yesterday that can make believing in the goodness of God so difficult today.

  4. Aug 25

    Echoes Of Yesterday Pt. 1 (with Cammie Hodge and Hezekiah Cunningham-Bey)

    In this episode of This Is Insanity, we unpack “Echoes of Yesterday” — a song about what happens when the wounds of our past begin shaping what we believe about God in the present. For some people, conversations about sexuality don't begin with theology. They begin much earlier—with rejection, abandonment, abuse, loneliness, disappointment, or prayers that seemed to go unanswered. And eventually, those experiences can leave behind a difficult question: If God cared about me, where was He then? And if He didn't seem to care about what happened to me then, why should I trust what He says about my sexuality now? This episode makes room for that question. “Echoes of Yesterday” explores how our histories can become echoes that follow us into our understanding of God. We talk honestly about the ways pain can distort our view of His character, why simply giving someone the “right answer” about sexuality may fail to address the deeper wounds underneath their questions, and why difficult conversations about the past can be an important part of learning to trust God again. The song doesn't offer easy explanations for suffering or pretend that every wound can be neatly resolved. Instead, it asks whether the God who seemed absent in our darkest moments might have been nearer than we understood—and whether His love can be trusted even in the places where we still have questions. Join us as we discuss brokenness, sexuality, suffering, trust, and the echoes of yesterday that can make believing in the goodness of God so difficult today.

  5. Jul 27

    Man Of My Dreams Pt. 2 (with Yana Jenay and Cammie Hodge)

    In this episode of This Is Insanity, we unpack “Man of My Dreams” — a song about the deepest longing behind every romantic longing. Whether we realize it or not, we often ask romance to do more than it was ever created to do. We hope another person will complete us, heal us, quiet our loneliness, and finally make us feel at home. But even the healthiest marriage was never designed to bear that kind of weight. This episode explores the surprising truth that our desire for perfect love ultimately points beyond human relationships. It points to Christ. For someone wrestling with same-sex attraction, that realization carries a unique weight. The question isn't simply whether certain desires should be pursued, but whether any romantic relationship—regardless of who it's with—can ultimately satisfy the deepest ache of the human heart. “Man of My Dreams” isn't a rejection of romance. It's a reordering of it. It's about seeing Jesus as the One every love story ultimately echoes. The One who knows us completely, loves us perfectly, and fulfills us more deeply than any earthly relationship ever could. Join us as we discuss love, longing, singleness, marriage, and why the greatest romance in the Christian story isn't between two people—it's between Christ and His redeemed people. When He becomes our greatest treasure, every other gift finds its proper place.

  6. Jul 24

    Man Of My Dreams Pt. 1 (with Yana Jenay and Cammie Hodge)

    In this episode of This Is Insanity, we unpack “Man of My Dreams” — a song about the deepest longing behind every romantic longing. Whether we realize it or not, we often ask romance to do more than it was ever created to do. We hope another person will complete us, heal us, quiet our loneliness, and finally make us feel at home. But even the healthiest marriage was never designed to bear that kind of weight. This episode explores the surprising truth that our desire for perfect love ultimately points beyond human relationships. It points to Christ. For someone wrestling with same-sex attraction, that realization carries a unique weight. The question isn't simply whether certain desires should be pursued, but whether any romantic relationship—regardless of who it's with—can ultimately satisfy the deepest ache of the human heart. “Man of My Dreams” isn't a rejection of romance. It's a reordering of it. It's about seeing Jesus as the One every love story ultimately echoes. The One who knows us completely, loves us perfectly, and fulfills us more deeply than any earthly relationship ever could. Join us as we discuss love, longing, singleness, marriage, and why the greatest romance in the Christian story isn't between two people—it's between Christ and His redeemed people. When He becomes our greatest treasure, every other gift finds its proper place.

  7. Jul 21

    Jonathan's Song (with Dustin Atchley and Cammie Hodge)

    In this episode of This Is Insanity, we unpack “Jonathan’s Song” — a reflection on biblical friendship, masculinity, and the kinds of love God designed men to experience. In a culture that often assumes deep affection between men must be romantic or sexual, we've forgotten the beauty of covenant friendship. Looking through the relationship of David and Jonathan, this song explores a picture of brotherhood marked by loyalty, vulnerability, sacrifice, and genuine love—without reducing it to something it was never intended to be. From there, the conversation becomes personal. As someone named Jonathan, I began asking what my own life revealed about the kinds of relationships I longed for. How much of what I desired was actually romantic, and how much was a deep hunger for the rich, emotionally present friendships that so many men have never been taught to pursue? This episode wrestles with the ways our culture often leaves men emotionally isolated. We talk about the fear of vulnerability, the pressure to keep relationships surface-level, and how the absence of meaningful male friendship can cause us to look elsewhere for needs God intended to be met within the body of Christ. “Jonathan’s Song” isn't an argument against romance. It's an invitation to recover something many of us have lost: the goodness of brotherhood. Because perhaps one of the enemy's greatest victories has been convincing men that intimacy and friendship cannot exist in the same sentence. Join us as we discuss biblical masculinity, covenant friendship, emotional intimacy, and the surprising freedom that comes when men rediscover the gift of loving one another as brothers in Christ.

  8. Jul 14

    Who I Am (with Joanne Solomon and Cammie Hodge)

    In this episode of This Is Insanity, we unpack “Who I Am” — a song about discovering that our identity is often formed in the presence of those who faithfully love us. For much of my life, I defined myself by the voices around me. Some affirmed me. Some wounded me. Some misunderstood me. And as I wrestled with same-sex attraction, it became easy to believe that my deepest struggles were also my deepest identity. But God, in His kindness, surrounded me with people who refused to let that be the end of my story. Through family, friends, mentors, and brothers in Christ, I was continually reminded of something I couldn't always see for myself: before I am anything else, I am a child of God. They didn't ignore my struggles, nor did they reduce me to them. Instead, they faithfully pointed me back to the gospel until I began to believe it for myself. This episode is about the gift of Christian community and the way God uses His people to speak truth into lives clouded by shame and confusion. Sometimes we need others to remind us who we are until we're able to say it with confidence ourselves. “Who I Am” is a song of gratitude. It's about the people who looked beyond my fears, my temptations, and my failures and consistently called me by the name God had already given me. Their love didn't create my identity—but it helped me see it more clearly. Join us as we discuss identity, spiritual family, discipleship, and the profound gift of being known, loved, and continually reminded that our truest identity is found in Christ.

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Ratings & Reviews

5
out of 5
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About

Some albums are made to be heard. This one was made to be survived and felt. This Is Insanity is a 17-episode limited series where Jonathan Solomon goes track by track through his album “Allegory Of Insanity” — unpacking the faith, the tension, and the internal war that made each song necessary. The album is about being a Christian who struggles with sexual attraction. The podcast is about everything that didn't fit in the lyrics. No easy answers. Just one person's honest conversation with God, with himself, and now — with you. New episodes dropping twice a week.

Information

  • Creator
    Jonathan Solomon
  • Years Active
    2026
  • Episodes
    22
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © Jonathan Solomon
  • Show Website
    This Is Insanity