The Unspoken Mindset

Joyce Conley-Hemmings
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Most leadership development teaches you what to do. This podcast is about who you have to become. The Unspoken Mindset of Leadership is a podcast for aspiring leaders, the ones who are hungry for real conversations, not polished corporate talking points. Hosted by Joyce Conley-Hemmings, school leadership strategist and author of The Unspoken Mindset: What No One Tells You About School Leadership. Each episode goes into the internal shifts, invisible mental models, and mindset work that most leadership programs skip entirely. Whether you're stepping into your first leadership & management role, navigating the identity shift that comes with a new title, or leading a team and still wondering why no one warned you about this part, you've found your people. Through solo deep dives and long-form guest conversations, Joyce unpacks what it actually feels like to lead from the inside out: the self-doubt, the relationship rewiring, the quiet moments when you realize the rules have changed and you're the one who has to figure it out. Every episode leaves you with a mindset shift, not just a to-do list. New episodes drop every two weeks. Subscribe so you don't miss a conversation. Connect with Joyce: www.theunspokenmindset.com LinkedIn

Episodes

  1. 3d ago

    Ep. 9: The Mental Rewiring from Teacher to Leader

    The promotion from classroom teacher to school leader is sold as a gain — more influence, more title, more reach. Nobody tells you it's an identity loss first. In this episode, Joyce breaks down the invisible mental rewiring that happens when your value stops being visible (student results, relationships, a great lesson) and becomes invisible (a culture that runs well, problems solved before they escalate, staff who feel supported). She shares her own transition from AP-seat overwhelm to understanding that leadership isn't about being the best person in the building — it's about making everyone else better. Recorded two weeks before the school year starts, this one's for every first-year leader walking in with a new title and an old set of instincts. Key TakeawaysThe leadership transition is an identity loss before it's an identity gain — the disorientation new leaders feel isn't weakness, it's a sign the transition is real.In the classroom, value is visible (data, relationships, results). In leadership, value is often invisible — a healthy culture, problems solved before they escalate. Learn to be effective without needing it to be seen.The core shift is from "I" to "we" — from being the expert who solves problems to being the person who builds other people's capacity to solve them.Grief is part of this transition. Naming that you miss being the expert doesn't mean you regret the move — skipping that grief just means carrying it quietly into how you lead.Unaddressed, this transition produces one of two failure modes: the micromanager who regresses to teacher behaviors, or the distant administrator who overcorrects and loses relational trust.Practical step: identify one problem you're solving that someone on your team should be solving instead — hand it off, let them work through it imperfectly, then debrief.Keywordsteacher to leader transition, new school leader, identity transition in leadership, educational leadership, assistant principal mindset, first-year school leader, leadership identity shift, letting go of control, leading through others, school leadership coaching, instructional leadership, new administrator mindset, district leadership pipeline, ego in leadership, leadership grief, distributed leadership, teacher leader mindset, back to school leadership, UMLA, The Unspoken Mindset 📖 The Unspoken Mindset: What No One Tells You About School Leadership — available on Amazon  https://a.co/d/026ENlpo Head to 🌐 theunspokenmindset.com for resources and ways to work with me! Get on the waitlist for the Fall Unspoken Mindset Circle: https://joyceconleyhemmings.kit.com/d19a341efa 💬 Join the Facebook community: https://www.facebook.com/share/g/1DGUebJYmW/ Let's Connect on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/joycehemmings/ Looking for a district pipeline program to support your new leaders? www.theunspokenmindset.com/umla

  2. Jul 19

    Ep. 8: Leading With Authenticity

    Authentic leadership is everywhere in leadership content right now — be yourself, bring your whole self to work. But almost nobody talks about what happens when who you actually are doesn't fit the culture you're actually in. When your directness is "too much" for the building. When you've learned to soften, code-switch, or over-prepare just to be extended the same benefit of the doubt others get by default. In this episode, Joyce Conley-Hemmings draws on her own experience navigating that tension to offer something most authenticity advice skips: a real framework for telling the difference between strategic adaptation and self-abandonment — and a plan for protecting your non-negotiables before the pressure to be someone else gets loud. What's covered: Why "just be authentic" advice breaks down inside cultures that don't make room for who you areThe three non-negotiables of authentic leadership — values, judgment, and voice — versus what's actually adaptive (style, delivery, communication strategy)How to tell strategic adaptation apart from self-abandonment before it costs you your sense of selfThe "identity anchoring" practice from the Unspoken Mindset Leadership Academy for getting grounded before pressure hitsA practical exercise: naming your non-negotiables and protecting one, deliberately, this week Keywords: authentic leadership, leading with authenticity, organizational culture, code-switching in leadership, self-abandonment vs adaptation, identity anchoring, school leadership, assistant principal mindset, UMLA, The Unspoken Mindset 📖 The Unspoken Mindset: What No One Tells You About School Leadership — available on Amazon  https://a.co/d/026ENlpo Head to 🌐 theunspokenmindset.com for resources and ways to work with me! 💬 Join the Facebook community: https://www.facebook.com/share/g/1DGUebJYmW/ Let's Connect on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/joycehemmings/ Looking for a district pipeline program to support your new leaders? www.theunspokenmindset.com/umla

  3. Jul 12

    Ep. 7: The Moment Everything Changed

    Episode 7 | The Moment Everything Changed Six months pregnant. Feet swollen. No access to the platform she needed. Waiting on a ride. And then — a text from her principal: Administrators do not leave in the middle of a crisis. That was Joyce's moment. Not a dramatic public failure. Not a visible breakdown. Just one message that landed in exactly the soft spot she hadn't been protecting — herself. In this episode, Joyce gets honest about the pivotal mindset moment that quietly redirected everything, and makes the case that the experiences most likely to develop you as a leader are the ones you've been trained to push past. What's covered in this episode: Why pivotal leadership moments almost never look the way we expectThe difference between executing a role and actually leading from within itHow vulnerability functions as a prerequisite for growth — not a liabilityWhy we walk past the exact experiences built to develop usWhat it means when your why changes — and what has to change with itThe reflection checkpoint practice Joyce built into the UMLA because nobody built it for herHow to go back to a moment you moved past too quickly and let it finish its work Keywords: school leadership mindset, assistant principal burnout, leadership pivotal moments, new leader development, educational leadership podcast, leadership identity, self-awareness in leadership, school administrator growth, principal support, UMLA, unspoken mindset 📖 The Unspoken Mindset: What No One Tells You About School Leadership — available on Amazon  https://a.co/d/026ENlpo Head to 🌐 theunspokenmindset.com for resources and ways to work with me! 💬 Join the Facebook community: https://www.facebook.com/share/g/1DGUebJYmW/ Let's Connect on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/joycehemmings/

  4. Jul 5

    Ep. 6: The Unspoken Rules of Power & Influence

    In this episode, Joyce names the thing most leadership development won't touch: that power in a school system has almost nothing to do with who holds the title, and everything to do with who holds the relationships. Drawing from her own experience of watching a well-researched, data-backed idea go absolutely nowhere because she hadn't done the relational groundwork first, Joyce breaks down how to navigate organizational politics without losing your integrity in the process. What's covered in this episode: Why ideas don't carry themselves — relationships doThe difference between navigating power and being corrupted by itThree principles of ethical influence: relationship before request, consistency as currency, and knowing the difference between a system and a personWhat to do when the informal power structure was already locked in before you arrivedHow to find the side door when the front door isn't open to you yetWhen staying and grinding isn't resilience — it's sunk cost with better brandingHow the UMLA helps districts give new leaders a framework for political and relational intelligence Keywords: school leadership politics, organizational influence, ethical leadership, new assistant principal, navigating power dynamics, school administrator mindset, leadership development podcast, relational intelligence, district leadership, informal power structure, school culture 📖 The Unspoken Mindset: What No One Tells You About School Leadership — available on Amazon https://a.co/d/026ENlpo If you're a district leader looking to develop your new leaders head to 🌐 theunspokenmindset.com to get on a call to discuss how Joyce can help! 💬 Join the Facebook community for aspiring and new assistant principals https://www.facebook.com/share/g/1DGUebJYmW/ Let's Connect on LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/joycehemmings/

  5. Jun 28

    Ep. 5: Silence, Discomfort, and the Space Where Leaders Grow

    Most leadership development tells you to do more, learn more, consume more. This episode makes the opposite case. In a culture that treats stillness as unproductive, Joyce challenges school leaders to reconsider what they're avoiding — and what they're missing because of it. Drawing from her own experience of almost drowning quietly in her first year as an assistant principal, Joyce unpacks why the most important growth you'll ever do as a leader happens not in the noise, but in the spaces between it. Key Topics: Why leaders become addicted to input — and what it costs themThe grief nobody warns you about when you step into leadershipThe mindset shift that changes everything: discomfort is data, not dangerThe critical difference between holding space and carrying weightThe five-minute pause practice and why it's a leadership skill, not self-care fluffHow the Unspoken Mindset Leadership Academy builds integration into leadership development — not just information Keywords: school leadership mindset, assistant principal advice, new leader burnout, emotional regulation in leadership, leadership identity, psychological safety, first-year principal, leadership development podcast, discomfort and growth, mindfulness for leaders, school administrator podcast RESOURCES Grab the book: The Unspoken Mindset: What No One Tells You About School Leadership - https://a.co/d/026ENlpo Website - https://theunspokenmindset.com LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/joycehemmings/

  6. Jun 21

    Ep. 4: What Stories Are You Telling Yourself?

    The most powerful decision-maker in your leadership isn't your training, your title, or your experience. It's the story running in the background of your mind, and most leaders don't even know it's in charge. In this episode of The Unspoken Mindset, Joyce breaks down the three types of stories every school leader carries: the origin story built from early experiences, the current story shaping how you see your team and your role right now, and the future story that's quietly enforcing your ceiling. This isn't positive thinking. This is a framework for seeing what's actually driving your decisions, and rewriting it with intention. 🎧 Listen and then download the free Narrative Audit worksheet at theunspokenmindset.com to do the work for yourself. SUMMARY Episode 4 introduces narrative identity in leadership; the idea that the stories leaders tell themselves about their capability and ceiling are active decision-makers, not background noise. Joyce walks through a practical framework for identifying, tracing, and reframing the three types of limiting narratives leaders carry. Closes with a guided introduction to the free Narrative Audit worksheet. KEYWORDS school leadership podcast, assistant principal mindset, limiting beliefs in leadership, cognitive reframing for leaders, new school administrator, leadership identity, imposter syndrome school leaders, mindset for principals KEY TOPICS The three story types: origin, current, futureHow limiting beliefs become invisible decision-makersCognitive reframing as a leadership disciplineThe Narrative Audit frameworkThe story gap in district leadership pipelines TAKEAWAYS Your internal narrative is shaping decisions whether you're aware of it or notOld stories feel true because they're old, age is not accuracyThe gap between capability and execution is almost never a skills gap, it's a story gapThe Narrative Audit worksheet walks you through the full process at theunspokenmindset.comRESOURCES Grab the book: The Unspoken Mindset: What No One Tells You About School Leadership - https://a.co/d/026ENlpo Website - https://theunspokenmindset.com LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/joycehemmings/

  7. Jun 14

    Ep. 3: The Leadership Identity Crisis

    That feeling of holding the title but not yet feeling what the title actually implies? It has a name. In this episode, Joyce breaks down the leadership identity crisis — the disorienting gap between when you step into a leadership role and when you actually feel like a leader. Through the story of Alex, a newly promoted Assistant Principal quietly struggling in ways no one around them can see, Joyce unpacks three patterns that show up when your old identity collides with your new role: imposter syndrome, over-proving behavior, and identity clinging. If you've ever looked around the room and wondered what everyone else has that you don't — this episode is for you. Summary Explore the leadership identity crisis, its manifestations, and how to navigate it effectively. Joyce Conley Hemmings shares insights on the internal struggles leaders face during transitions and practical strategies for growth. Keywords Leadership, Identity Crisis, Imposter Syndrome, Leadership Development, Personal Growth, Principal, Assistant Principal Key topics Leadership identity crisis Imposter syndrome in leadership Overcoming over-proving behavior The concept of identity lag Strategies for internal growth during leadership transitions Takeaways Recognize the leadership identity crisis as a normal part of growth. Name the patterns of imposter syndrome, over-proving, and identity clinging. Understand the concept of identity lag and its role in leadership transitions. Ask yourself who you want to be in your leadership role, not just what skills to develop. Processing the internal identity questions is crucial for authentic leadership. Resources Grab the book: The Unspoken Mindset: What No One Tells You About School Leadership - https://a.co/d/026ENlpo Website - https://theunspokenmindset.com LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/joycehemmings/

  8. Jun 8

    Ep. 2: Why Didn't Anyone Tell Me This?

    You can learn every skill on the list, how to delegate, how to give feedback, how to run a meeting, and still feel like something isn't working. That something isn't a skill gap. It's an identity gap. In this episode, Joyce unpacks the shift that most leadership development never puts on the curriculum: the uncomfortable internal work of moving from doing leadership to actually being a leader. Through the story of Morgan, a high-performing new manager slowly realizing the strengths that got them promoted are now holding them back, Joyce makes the case that real leadership growth isn't behavioral. It starts at the identity level. Ready to bring this mindset shift to your leadership? Let's Connect! www.theunspokenmindset.com Find the Book on Amazon Join the Conversation on Facebook Keywords leadership, identity, self-awareness, mindset, development, growth, performance, internal work, leadership crisis, reflection Summary In this episode, Joyce explores the often overlooked internal shifts that accompany stepping into a leadership role. She emphasizes that true leadership is not just about acquiring skills but involves a significant identity transformation. Joyce discusses the importance of self-awareness and reflection in crossing the threshold from merely performing leadership tasks to genuinely embodying the role. Through the story of Morgan, a high-performing individual struggling with her new leadership identity, Joyce illustrates the necessity of doing the internal work to become an effective leader. The episode concludes with reflective questions for listeners to consider their own leadership identities. Takeaways Nobody prepares you for the internal shift in leadership. Skills that once helped you may hinder you as a leader. Leadership development often misses the inner mindset shifts. True leadership is about being, not just doing. Experience alone does not guarantee effective leadership. Self-awareness is crucial for leadership growth. Reflection helps in understanding one's leadership identity. The behaviors of high performers can become liabilities in leadership. Internal work is necessary for sustainable leadership. Self-inquiry is essential for true leadership development. The Unspoken Shift in Leadership Identity Navigating the Inner Layer of Leadership Development Sound Bites "This is entirely about you." "The gap between doing and actually being." "It's not experience alone that matters." "The solution is to do the internal work." Chapters The Unspoken Shift in Leadership Identity The Inner Layer of Leadership Development Crossing the Unspoken Threshold The Role of Self-Awareness in Leadership The Story of Morgan: A Leadership Case Study Reflecting on Your Leadership Identity

  9. Jun 6

    Ep. 1: The Readiness Illusion

    You got the job. You signed the contract. You told everyone. So why didn't confidence show up with you on day one? In this episode, Joyce gets honest about the mindset trap that catches nearly every new leader off guard: the belief that the title will make you feel ready. Drawing from her own experience of almost walking away in her first year, Joyce unpacks why readiness isn't something you wait for, and how the leaders who push through aren't the ones who feel prepared; they're the ones who learn to lead through the uncertainty anyway. Let's Connect: www.theunspokenmindset.com Find the Book On Amazon Join the Community on Facebook Summary In this conversation, Joyce Conley-Hemmings discusses the concept of readiness in leadership roles, particularly in education. She shares her personal experiences transitioning from a teacher to an assistant principal, emphasizing that readiness is often an illusion. Joyce highlights the importance of mindset and the need for ongoing training to develop both skills and mental resilience. She encourages aspiring leaders to lead with intention rather than waiting to feel ready, and to embrace discomfort as a sign of growth. Takeaways Readiness is often an illusion for new leaders. Mindset is crucial for effective leadership. Training should include both skills and mindset shifts. Discomfort indicates growth, not failure. Leaders must lead with intention, not wait for comfort. The transition from teacher to administrator is challenging. Personal experiences shape leadership readiness. Clarity is different from certainty in leadership. Ongoing support and mentorship are vital for new leaders. Mindset shifts are necessary for successful leadership transitions.

  • 9 Episodes

Ratings & Reviews

5
out of 5
2 Ratings

About

Most leadership development teaches you what to do. This podcast is about who you have to become. The Unspoken Mindset of Leadership is a podcast for aspiring leaders, the ones who are hungry for real conversations, not polished corporate talking points. Hosted by Joyce Conley-Hemmings, school leadership strategist and author of The Unspoken Mindset: What No One Tells You About School Leadership. Each episode goes into the internal shifts, invisible mental models, and mindset work that most leadership programs skip entirely. Whether you're stepping into your first leadership & management role, navigating the identity shift that comes with a new title, or leading a team and still wondering why no one warned you about this part, you've found your people. Through solo deep dives and long-form guest conversations, Joyce unpacks what it actually feels like to lead from the inside out: the self-doubt, the relationship rewiring, the quiet moments when you realize the rules have changed and you're the one who has to figure it out. Every episode leaves you with a mindset shift, not just a to-do list. New episodes drop every two weeks. Subscribe so you don't miss a conversation. Connect with Joyce: www.theunspokenmindset.com LinkedIn

Information

  • Creator
    Joyce Conley-Hemmings
  • Years Active
    2026
  • Episodes
    9
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © 2026 Joyce Conley-Hemmings