HisNHers Unfiltered

Joia & Torrence
  • 5.0 (1)
  • Relationships
  • Updated Weekly

His & Hers: Unfiltered is where real relationships meet real conversations. Hosted by husband-and-wife duo Joia and Torrence, this isn't your typical relationship podcast. We're bringing honest, unfiltered discussions about love, marriage, dating, family, money, entrepreneurship, pop culture, and everything in between—without the sugarcoating. Every week, we sit down with a signature cocktail in hand and tackle the conversations everyone is having behind closed doors but few are willing to have out loud. From modern dating struggles and marriage realities to viral relationship debates, Black culture, trending topics, and the challenges of building a life together, no topic is off-limits. Expect bold opinions, healthy disagreements, plenty of laughs, and a fresh perspective from both the male and female point of view. Whether you're single, dating, married, divorced, situationship-ing, or simply trying to make sense of today's relationship landscape, you'll find yourself somewhere in these conversations. Each episode features: 🥂 The Signature Sip – A custom cocktail inspired by the week's topic 🎙️ Straight, No Chaser – Unfiltered discussion on the main topic 🍸 Sip or Tell – A game where honesty is tested and secrets may spill 📱 Y'all Said What? – Listener questions, hot takes, and social media drama ⚖️ The Verdict – Final thoughts and takeaways from both sides At the end of the day, we're not relationship experts—we're just a real married couple sharing our experiences, perspectives, wins, mistakes, and lessons learned along the way. So grab a drink, pull up a chair, and join the conversation. Welcome to His & Hers: Unfiltered—where the conversations are honest, the opinions are bold, and the drinks are always flowing. New episodes weekly. Subscribe and join the family

  1. 6d ago

    You Want a Traditional Partner... But Are YOU Traditional?

    Everybody wants a traditional partner. But how many people actually want the responsibilities that come with a traditional relationship? Men want feminine, supportive women. Women want protective, providing men. But once money, housework, childcare, leadership, career sacrifices, submission and responsibility enter the conversation, "traditional" can start looking a lot more complicated. This week, Joia and Torrence put traditional relationships under the microscope, including their own marriage. What does a traditional man actually owe his woman? What does a traditional woman owe her man? Can you expect traditional gender roles while keeping the modern ones that benefit you? And what happens when being traditional actually costs you something? Because maybe the real question isn't whether you can find a traditional partner. Are YOU traditional enough to be one? Listen now and decide where you fall. HisNHers Unfiltered: Where Black Love, Culture & Conversation Collide.

    You Want a Traditional Partner... But Are YOU Traditional?

  2. Oct 1

    Black Men vs. Black Women: When Did Love Become a Gender War?

    Social media would have you believe Black men and Black women are at war. Black women are "too masculine." Black men are "dusty." Women need to "date out." Men need to "get their passports." Provider, submission, masculinity, femininity, and dating conversations have turned into entire online communities built around telling one side exactly what's wrong with the other. But how much of that reflects real life? In this episode of HisNHers Unfiltered, Joia and Torrence ask a bigger question: Do Black men and Black women really have a relationship problem, or have we built a profitable culture around convincing each other that we're the problem? They unpack the difference between accountability and contempt, how individual hurt becomes collective accusations, the role algorithms and outrage play in amplifying gender-war content, and why validating someone's anger isn't necessarily the same as helping them heal. They also tackle Passport Bros, provider and submission debates, and what happens when Black boys and girls grow up hearing constant messages that the opposite sex within their own community is the enemy. Because this conversation is bigger than dating. Black men and Black women are mothers and sons, fathers and daughters, brothers and sisters, friends, coworkers, business partners, parents, husbands, wives, and members of the same community. Maybe ending the gender war doesn't require agreement on everything. Maybe it requires goodwill. Welcome to HisNHers Unfiltered, where Black Love, Culture & Conversation Collide. Real. Raw. Unfiltered.

    Black Men vs. Black Women: When Did Love Become a Gender War?

  3. Sep 24

    Relationship Draft: What If You Could Build the Perfect Partner?

    What happens when a husband and wife have to build their "perfect partner" from the same 15 relationship traits? In this episode of HisNHers Unfiltered, Joia and Torrence are officially on the clock for the 2026 Relationship Draft. We each get five picks. Once a trait is drafted, it's OFF the board. Loyalty. Trustworthiness. Great sex. Financial stability. Emotional intelligence. Physical attraction. Accountability. Peace. Ambition. Communication. And more. But every pick comes with a catch: a hidden relationship question designed to expose WHY we value what we value. Then we put our final rosters to the test with a Steal, a no-explanation Rapid Fire, and the ultimate question: Did we actually build our perfect partners... or did we expose ourselves? Some of these picks surprised us. Some started debates. And a few might have you looking at your own relationship very differently. So you're officially on the clock: You have the #1 overall pick and all 15 relationship traits are available. What are YOU drafting first, and why? 🥂 Welcome to HisNHers Unfiltered, where Black love, culture and conversations collide. Follow @HisNHersUnfiltered if you want to hear BOTH sides of the conversation. #HisNHersUnfiltered #RelationshipDraft #Relationships #BlackLove #RelationshipPodcast #Marriage #RelationshipAdvice

    Relationship Draft: What If You Could Build the Perfect Partner?

  4. Sep 17

    You Don’t Trust Them… So Why Are You Still There?

    What happens when trust is broken in a relationship… but you decide to stay? You forgave them. You stayed. But now you’re checking phones, questioning stories, watching locations, second-guessing decisions and waiting for the next reason not to believe them. So are you actually rebuilding trust—or just staying in a relationship with someone you no longer trust? In this episode of His & Hers: Unfiltered, Joia and Torrence unpack trust issues in relationships, rebuilding trust after betrayal, privacy vs. secrecy, reassurance vs. surveillance, and the uncomfortable reality of choosing to stay after trust has been broken. And trust isn't just about cheating. Can you trust your partner with money? Their judgment? Business decisions? Their friendships? Can you disagree with a decision your spouse makes and still trust them enough to make it? As a married couple and entrepreneurs, Joia and Torrence also get into what trust looks like when marriage and business collide—and why trusting someone's judgment can become just as important as trusting their fidelity. Then we're playing Trust Issue or Red Flag? Is your suspicion coming from insecurity, past relationship trauma or fear—or is your partner's behavior giving you a legitimate reason not to trust them? This week's Signature Sip is The Alibi. 🥃 If someone breaks your trust, they have a responsibility to become trustworthy again. But if you choose to stay, is there eventually a responsibility to allow the relationship to heal? Because staying and rebuilding aren't necessarily the same thing. So let's have the conversation: Can a relationship fully recover after trust has been broken? His & Hers: Unfiltered — Where Black Love, Culture & Conversation Collide. #HisNHersUnfiltered

    You Don’t Trust Them… So Why Are You Still There?

  5. Sep 10

    Is It Cheating... If You Never Touched Them?

    Can you cheat on your partner without ever physically touching another person? No sex. No kiss. Maybe you've never even been in the same room. But what about the DMs you deleted? The coworker you've gotten a little too close to? The ex who still has access? The person you vent to about your relationship? Or the attention you keep entertaining because technically... “nothing happened.” In Episode 14 of His & Hers: Unfiltered, Joia and Torrence are getting into the gray areas of infidelity and asking a bigger question: Where does cheating actually begin? Is it the physical act—or can the betrayal happen long before anybody ever touches? We're talking emotional affairs, flirting, secret DMs, deleted messages, work husbands and work wives, exes, “backup options,” digital sexual content, privacy vs. secrecy, and the difference between something being disrespectful and actually being cheating. And we're putting one definition to the test: INTENTION + SECRECY + ACTION. If your intention is outside the boundaries of your relationship, you're hiding what you're doing because you know it would violate your partner's trust, and you take action to pursue or entertain it anyway... does it really matter that you never got the opportunity to finish? Because “nothing happened” doesn't necessarily mean nothing was happening. This week's Signature Sip is The Side Piece—a strawberry whiskey cocktail that's sweet, smooth, tempting and goes down a little too easy... which is probably how you got yourself into this situation in the first place. So where do YOU draw the line? Is it cheating if you never touched them? His & Hers: Unfiltered — Where Black Love, Culture & Conversation Collide.

    Is It Cheating... If You Never Touched Them?

  6. Sep 3

    Great Chemistry... Terrible Compatibility

    Have you ever had INSANE chemistry with someone you had absolutely no business building a life with? The attraction is there. The conversation flows. The sex is amazing. You can't stay away from each other... But when it comes to money, communication, children, ambition, lifestyle, values or how you actually want to live your lives—you don't work. In Episode 13 of His & Hers: Unfiltered, Joia and Torrence are breaking down the difference between chemistry and compatibility—and why confusing the two can keep us in relationships long past their expiration date. We're talking about whether butterflies are always a good thing, why chaos can sometimes feel like passion, how great sex can make us negotiate with red flags, and what happens when someone checks every box on paper... but there's no spark. We also get into the compatibility issues that actually matter when you're trying to build a life together: money, children, ambition, lifestyle, values, communication and sexual compatibility. Plus, what happens when the qualities that attracted you to someone become the exact things you can't stand years later? And are you actually compatible with the person you're dating, or with the potential version of them you've created in your head? This week's Signature Sip is Toxic Attraction, because sometimes something can look good, feel good and have you coming right back for more... even when you KNOW it isn't good for you. The question we're answering: Would you rather have 10/10 chemistry and 5/10 compatibility—or 7/10 chemistry and 10/10 compatibility? Because chemistry can make you fall in love. Compatibility determines whether you can actually build a life together. His & Hers: Unfiltered — Where Black Love, Culture & Conversation Collide.

    Great Chemistry... Terrible Compatibility

  7. Aug 27

    Are You in Love... or Just Codependent?

    We hear it all the time after a breakup or divorce: I'm finally getting back to me. Suddenly they're traveling again, reconnecting with friends, getting back in the gym, rediscovering old hobbies and celebrating their newfound freedom. But that raises an uncomfortable question: If becoming single feels like getting yourself back... where did YOU go? In this episode of His & Hers: Unfiltered, Joia and Torrence unpack the complicated line between deep love, healthy dependence and codependency—and whether we've romanticized losing ourselves in relationships. Can your partner be your best friend without becoming your entire social life? Is wanting to do everything together romantic or unhealthy? Should married couples have separate friends, hobbies and experiences? And why can a partner's individual growth sometimes feel threatening? They also tackle the other extreme: hyper-independence. Because the answer to codependency isn't I don't need anybody. Healthy relationships require vulnerability, reliance and sometimes genuinely needing the person you've chosen to build a life with. The goal isn't complete independence. It's healthy interdependence—being able to build an us without erasing the me. This week's Signature Sip is The Other Half, inspired by another phrase we love to romanticize. But maybe two healthy people aren't two halves trying to become whole. Maybe they're two whole people intentionally choosing to build one life. So ask yourself: If your relationship ended tomorrow, what parts of your life and identity would still belong completely to YOU? Because you shouldn't have to become single again just to remember who you are. His & Hers: Unfiltered — Where Black Love, Culture & Conversation Collide.

    Are You in Love... or Just Codependent?

  8. Aug 20

    What Would YOU Do?

    What would you do if the person you love put you in a situation where there was no obvious right answer? In this episode of His & Hers: Unfiltered, Joia and Torrence put themselves—and each other—to the test with 10 relationship dilemmas where love, loyalty, trust, attraction, money, family, and boundaries collide. What happens when you still love your partner but the attraction is gone? Would you uproot your life for their dream opportunity? Is secretly giving thousands of dollars to family an act of loyalty—or financial betrayal? How close is too close with an ex? And when your partner's family crosses the line, whose responsibility is it to check them? From hidden debt and opposite-sex friendships to blended families, co-parenting, career sacrifices, and prenups, these aren't situations with easy answers. They're the kind of decisions that force you to figure out what you really believe about love, commitment, forgiveness, and your own boundaries. Then Joia and Torrence pull out the paddles for Let It Slide or Crash Out, where there's no time to overthink it—just pick a side and defend it. This week's Signature Sip is The Crossroads, because sometimes relationships bring you to a place where there isn't a perfect choice. You just have to decide which direction you're going. So grab your Signature Sip and play along. Which scenario would have YOU completely torn? And most importantly... what would YOU do? His & Hers: Unfiltered — Where Black Love, Culture & Conversation Collide.

    What Would YOU Do?
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About

His & Hers: Unfiltered is where real relationships meet real conversations. Hosted by husband-and-wife duo Joia and Torrence, this isn't your typical relationship podcast. We're bringing honest, unfiltered discussions about love, marriage, dating, family, money, entrepreneurship, pop culture, and everything in between—without the sugarcoating. Every week, we sit down with a signature cocktail in hand and tackle the conversations everyone is having behind closed doors but few are willing to have out loud. From modern dating struggles and marriage realities to viral relationship debates, Black culture, trending topics, and the challenges of building a life together, no topic is off-limits. Expect bold opinions, healthy disagreements, plenty of laughs, and a fresh perspective from both the male and female point of view. Whether you're single, dating, married, divorced, situationship-ing, or simply trying to make sense of today's relationship landscape, you'll find yourself somewhere in these conversations. Each episode features: 🥂 The Signature Sip – A custom cocktail inspired by the week's topic 🎙️ Straight, No Chaser – Unfiltered discussion on the main topic 🍸 Sip or Tell – A game where honesty is tested and secrets may spill 📱 Y'all Said What? – Listener questions, hot takes, and social media drama ⚖️ The Verdict – Final thoughts and takeaways from both sides At the end of the day, we're not relationship experts—we're just a real married couple sharing our experiences, perspectives, wins, mistakes, and lessons learned along the way. So grab a drink, pull up a chair, and join the conversation. Welcome to His & Hers: Unfiltered—where the conversations are honest, the opinions are bold, and the drinks are always flowing. New episodes weekly. Subscribe and join the family

Information

  • Creator
    Joia & Torrence
  • Years Active
    2026
  • Episodes
    18
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © Copyright 2026 H&HUnfiltered
  • Show Website
    HisNHers Unfiltered