From Living It Daily (This is an expanded revisit of a previous article from September 19, 2025.) In a world filled with so much rage, chaos, and uncertainty, it’s sometimes difficult to face the day-to-day situations we encounter on a continuing basis. Fortunately, we don’t have to bow to the pressures of the world around us and join in its chorus of negativity and criticism toward those around us, whether at home or at work. We can do something totally foreign to many and considered “living in a dream world” by others. If we choose to follow a different path, they may even say to us, “You can’t go around denying reality.” I agree with that, but I am not talking about doing that at all. What I am suggesting here is that we do something that will not only make other people have a better day (and quite possibly have a better life) but also help them gain some confidence in themselves and what they do. I have not come up with this suggestion out of the blue. It is something I determined to do a while ago, and the end result has been forging better relationships with those I am around on a constant basis, as well as new acquaintances. You see, the people in our lives matter, have much to offer, and are essential. Sometimes they need to be encouraged, and at other times they need to be admonished. That admonishment should not be harsh, but at times it must be firm. The three words in the title above are words often ignored in the lives we lead these days. More often than not, people are much more likely to be despondent, discouraged, and beaten down by those they associate with, whether from those in leadership positions above them or in their peer groups and acquaintances. But here’s what I’ve come to realize: encourage, motivate, and inspire aren’t three ways of saying the same thing. They’re three different gifts, and most of us are better at giving one than the other two. If we want to really make a difference in someone’s life, we can’t stop at just one. To Encourage I would even go so far as to say we don’t have to go far to see the attitude of many people. It’s obvious as we daily travel the highways and byways on our way to and from the places we have to go or be. Many of us experience “road rage” in one form or another as we drive on our daily journeys. Sometimes we do make mistakes while driving and are exposed to verbal and visual tirades from those we have inadvertently agitated. In fact, we sometimes react the same way ourselves. (Wow, I wish I didn’t need to add that last part, but, honestly, I haven’t yet gained complete control over my reactions to unavoidable circumstances, either. I’m still working on it, though.) Unfortunately, we often don’t know what’s going on in the lives of those who abruptly pull out in front of us or do something else that upsets us. We generally react to how they have upset our own world with little thought about them or what might be going on in theirs. Perhaps they have just received some bad news, lost a loved one, gotten fired from their job, or broken up with their boyfriend or girlfriend. Maybe they just made a mistake, an error in judgment, or their mind wandered for a moment; we just don’t know, do we? That’s what encouragement is. It meets someone right where they are, in the moment, without needing to know the whole story first. It’s the quickest of the three to offer, and often the one people need most, simply because so few are willing to give it. I know this because I’ve been on the receiving end of it. As often happens as we go through living our day-to-day lives, we sometimes get discouraged with where we are and what we have and haven’t accomplished. I was going through one of those days, and I guess the weight of it all was showing on my face or in my attitude. I was taking a break from a frustrating time at work when a friend stopped by the little break room and said hello. He asked how I was doing. I tried to cover my frustrations but obviously wasn’t doing a very good job of it. He started to walk away, hesitated, and then returned, asking what was really the matter. He said I looked like I was carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders. I quickly explained what I was working on wasn’t going well and that I wasn’t even sure why I kept trying. In fact, there were so many things in my life I wanted to get done, and not many of them were getting done either. I admitted I was discouraged and frustrated and had been for a while. He just smiled at me, put his hand on my shoulder, and said, “Look, I know you and what you do and have done. Stop looking at the things you haven’t done and look at the many things you have done. The other things will happen in their time, too.” I was encouraged as he walked away, and wouldn’t you know, that whole day turned around from that point, and I treasured just the little bit of time he took to speak some words of encouragement. And by the way, the job I was working on got completed, also. That’s the thing about encouragement. Sometimes you’re the one giving it, and sometimes you’re the one who needs it most. Both matter. To Motivate Encouragement meets a person where they are. Motivation asks them to move. There’s a difference between telling someone “it’s okay” and telling someone “you can do this.” The first eases a burden. The second puts a challenge in front of them and says, I believe you’re capable of more. Motivation is less comfortable to give and receive because it asks something of the other person. But that’s exactly why it matters. I haven’t always had my own business. I worked in an AMF bowling establishment for fifteen years as head mechanic. Although being a head mechanic had many jobs associated with it, I also had three people working for me, and I delegated certain responsibilities to them as any good boss would do. One of those jobs happened every Wednesday and Saturday night after closing. Because part of lane maintenance required stripping the lanes of the conditioning oil put down on a regular basis, I taught them the way I wanted it done. Honestly, I knew the best way to keep the lanes clean because I had done it myself before they came to work for me. That’s why I say I taught them how to do it. To make a long story short, some complaints had been made that the lanes weren’t as clean as they should be. I knew the process I had developed worked well, so I decided to check in on them one night to see how they were cleaning the lanes. I wanted to know whether there was a problem with the cleaning solution mixture, the cleaning equipment, or something else. Admittedly, they were surprised to see me that night, but I wasn’t expecting what I discovered. Even though the job of cleaning took approximately an hour to finish, I walked in about fifteen minutes into their process, and they were already two-thirds of the way done. I noticed they weren’t using the usual cleaning equipment, and they were using a chemical cleaner not really made for the job. The proper one was water-based and required the right mixture and equipment to do the job correctly. When I asked them why they were doing it the way they were, they answered that their way was faster and they could get the job done more quickly, like in half the time or less. I didn’t get angry. I took the time to explain to them why their way wasn’t working. I had to mention the complaints we were receiving from the customers and showed them the last couple of lanes they had just completed and how there was still oil residue on them. Then we got the right cleaner and the right equipment out, and I cleaned those two previously cleaned lanes and a third uncleaned one, explaining as I did so. They agreed the correct process worked better than theirs. I then told them as kindly as I could that I appreciated their desire to try something new. I also knew they could do better. But it wasn’t how fast the job got done; it was that it was done right. I knew they could do it correctly and maybe even a little more quickly. In the end, the lanes were cleaner, and everyone was happier. That’s motivation in a nutshell. Not anger, not letting it slide, just holding someone to a standard because you believe they’re capable of meeting it. To Inspire If encouragement meets someone in the moment, and motivation pushes them toward the next step, inspiration is different still. It’s not something we can hand someone directly. Inspiration often happens simply in the watching, in paying attention to how the people around us carry what they’ve been given. As I work in my service business, I meet many different people. Some are inspiring and others, well, not so much. I admit, I’m a people watcher. I observe the people I work for and the people I meet or see on a daily basis. I have been in my service business for over thirty-six years, and over that time, I have met people who have inspired me with their stories and the way they’ve handled difficult illnesses or life-changing situations. I have also run across those who have moved me with compassion for the way they dislike their plight in life. They are definitely unhappy people. They seem to be easily defeated. Others can’t be held back, no matter what is thrown at them. They are resilient and full of life. Every day is faced with a determination to see what can be accomplished, whatever comes their way. And then there are those who consider their “light” sufferings to be life-threatening. Every breath is a chore to them while they pine away the days, lamenting about how it could’ve been, “if only” they had gotten a break instead of the hand they were dealt. It is precisely these differences that make one fail while another succeeds, no matter how trying the circumstan
