What The Peri? - With Kirsten Cooke

Kirsten Cooke
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You're not going crazy. You're not broken. And no — it's not "just stress." Somewhere in your 40s or 50s, your body starts doing things nobody warned you about — the weight that won't shift, the broken sleep, the brain fog, the anxiety from nowhere, the feeling that you've lost yourself. And when you finally go looking for answers, too often you're dismissed, brushed off, or sent away still confused. What the Peri? is the podcast for women navigating perimenopause and menopause who are done being dismissed and just need someone to make it all make sense. Each episode cuts through the noise, the myths and the medical gaslighting — with honest conversations, real science, and plain-English answers about your hormones, your symptoms, and what actually helps. I'm Kirsten Cooke — a personal trainer, women's health coach, perimenopause and menopause coach, and mum of four. I'm not talking to you from the outside looking in; I'm walking this road myself. These are the conversations I wish someone had sat me down and had with me years ago. You are not imagining it. It is not your fault. And you are not alone. The change you didn't ask for. The conversations you need.  Follow now so you don't miss an episode.

  1. 4d ago

    One Drink, Full Hangover in Perimenopause — Why Alcohol Hits Harder Now (Ep 13)

    (Ep 13) Picture a girlfriend's fiftieth — a long table in her backyard, fairy lights in the trees, and a bucket of ice with the bubbles already chilling. You've barely put your handbag down before somebody presses a glass of prosecco into your hand. And when you say no thanks, there's that little pause, the raised eyebrow, the "go on, just one", and someone joking that you must be pregnant. Suddenly you're explaining yourself, when all you did was say no to a drink. I rarely drink any more, because my body can't tolerate it now. These days, even one drink leaves my skin flushed, a headache settling in, nausea for the rest of the night, horrible sleep, and a proper hangover the next morning. It's just not worth it to me. That won't be everyone's story — but I know a lot of women who used to enjoy a few drinks and can't tolerate it at all now, in perimenopause. So this week I'm paying the promise I made back in the weight episode and giving alcohol its own episode — why so many of us drink, why it can feel like the thing getting you through perimenopause, what it's doing in your body now, and what helps. One promise before you start: I'm not here to judge. I'm here to give you the facts, so you can make empowered choices for your health during this phase of life. In this episode: → The pressure to drink — the glass in your hand before you've sat down, the top-ups you never asked for, and how hard it can be to say no in a culture built around a drink → Why women drink — to relax, to fit in, a bit of Dutch courage, to cope with stress — and how easily it happens → Why a drink can feel like it's getting you through perimenopause — what a UK study of women aged forty to sixty-five found about drinking to cope → The cycle — why the drink that takes the edge off tonight makes tomorrow harder, and why that relief is a bit of an illusion → Hangxiety — the racing heart and dread the morning after, and what's going on in your brain as the alcohol wears off → Why one drink hits harder now — what changes in your body and your liver, and what menopause doctors are seeing in their clinics → Hot flushes, sleep and your brain — the link with night sweats, the nightcap as a false friend, and what regular drinking does to your grey matter → Breast cancer, Group 1 and the red wine myth — what the category really means, the other half of the HRT sentence from Episode 3, and why nobody can tell you a drink protects your heart any more → What helps — alcohol-free swaps, what to say when someone pushes a drink on you, a different way to end the day, and where to get support YOUR ALCOHOL TOOLKIT — where to start this week: Notice when you reach for a drink, and what job it's doing for you · Try two weeks alcohol-free, or with far fewer drinks, and watch your sleep, your hot flushes, your mood and your mornings · Plan your next social occasion before you get there — choose your alcohol-free drink and your one line · A drink in your hand stops most of the offers · Cutting back? Decide your number before you go, eat first, alternate with water, and have alcohol-free days in your week · You don't owe anyone an explanation — "I'm good, thanks" is enough · Change the six o'clock ritual — a walk, a shower, a cup of tea, a call with a friend · If it's perimenopause symptoms you're numbing, talk to your GP — they can be treated · Worried you're relying on it? Talk to your GP, or call the National Alcohol and Other Drug Hotline, free and 24/7, on 1800 250 015 · If you've been drinking heavily every day, talk to your GP before you stop suddenly Small changes stack. You don't have to fix it all at once — you just have to start. If one drink now leaves you flushed, foggy and hungover, or the evening glass has quietly become the thing getting you through — please consider that you might simply be a woman whose body has changed, in a culture that hands her a drink at every turn. You deserve the facts, and the freedom to choose what's right for you. --- Ready to work with me? The Peri Protocol is my personalised coaching program for women in perimenopause and menopause. Apply here → www.kirstencookecoaching.com/apply Grab your free guide — download your free What the Peri? guide → www.kirstencookecoaching.com/free-guide Come say hi 🌸 Follow along on Instagram and Facebook @kirstencookecoaching — I'd love to hear what resonated with you. --- Research referenced: Davies et al. (2025). Women's alcohol use in mid-life: identifying associations between menopause symptoms, drinking behaviour, and mental health Rothman R, Aitken B (2025). Why do some people get 'hangxiety' after a night of drinking and others don't? — Swinburne University of Technology, The Conversation Kwon R, Chang Y, Kim Y et al. (2022). Alcohol consumption patterns and risk of early-onset vasomotor symptoms in premenopausal women — Nutrients Daviet R, Aydogan G, Jagannathan K et al. (2022). Associations between alcohol consumption and gray and white matter volumes in the UK Biobank — Nature Communications Topiwala A, Levey DF, Zhou H et al. (2025) — BMJ Evidence-Based Medicine. Alcohol and dementia risk in more than 559,000 adults, using genetic analysis Huberman Lab (2022). What Alcohol Does to Your Body, Brain & Health US Surgeon General (2025). Alcohol and Cancer Risk — Surgeon General's Advisory International Agency for Research on Cancer — alcohol as a Group 1 carcinogen World Cancer Research Fund / American Institute for Cancer Research (2018). Continuous Update Project — alcohol and breast cancer American Heart Association (2025). Scientific statement on alcohol and cardiovascular disease — Circulation Zhao J, Stockwell T, Naimi T et al. (2023). Association between daily alcohol intake and risk of all-cause mortality — JAMA Network Open Australian Institute of Health and Welfare (2024). National Drug Strategy Household Survey 2022–2023 National Health and Medical Research Council (2020). Australian guidelines to reduce health risks from drinking alcohol Macaulay S, Grinzi P, Slota-Kan S (2023). General practitioner-led alcohol and other drugs withdrawal — Australian Journal of General Practice Note: If you're worried about how much you're drinking, please talk to your GP, or call the National Alcohol and Other Drug Hotline, free and 24 hours a day, on 1800 250 015. If you've been drinking heavily every day, please talk to your GP before stopping suddenly. This podcast is for educational purposes only and does not constitute medical advice. Always consult a qualified healthcare practitioner for personal medical decisions. If you're experiencing a mental health crisis, please contact Lifeline on 13 11 14 (Australia).

    One Drink, Full Hangover in Perimenopause — Why Alcohol Hits Harder Now (Ep 13)

  2. Oct 9

    Perimenopause & Your Pelvic Floor — Leaking, Urgency & What Actually Helps (Ep 12)

    (Ep 12) You're at a concert with your oldest friends, and when the chorus hits you jump, just once — and you feel it. You tell your friend you just peed a little, tie your jacket round your waist, and spend the rest of the night swaying very carefully. Or you do what one of my friends and her girlfriends did: tie the jackets on, keep dancing, and deal with it at home, all of them in black. And it isn't only concerts. It's the sneeze in the line at the grocery store, the big laugh with a friend, and the trampoline you can't get on with your kids. I've been there myself. If I laughed too hard, I'd just about pee my pants — and lots of Pilates has made a real difference. I also get frequent mini UTIs, so I'm talking with my hormone doctor right now about starting vaginal oestrogen. So this week I'm paying last week's promise and talking about your pelvic floor and your bladder — what changes through perimenopause, why so many of us plan our day around the nearest toilet, and the long list of things that help. One promise before you start: this is very common, but it isn't something you have to put up with quietly. In this episode: → What this is like to live with — knowing where every toilet is, the pad in your handbag, the black leggings, the rush when your key hits the front door, and the Bounce party you sit out → The other side of it — how sharing it with your girlfriends can turn it into a running joke, and why that takes so much of the sting out → What your pelvic floor actually is, and the two very different kinds of bladder trouble — leaking with a laugh, sneeze or jump, and the sudden "I have to go now" → The good news about leaking — what a large study of women in their forties and early fifties found, and why it's mostly about your muscles and the pressure on them → Where your hormones do come into it — urgency, stinging, needing to go more often and more UTIs, plus a quick look at the vaginal changes we'll cover properly in the Sexual Health episode → Pelvic floor exercises that work — how to find the muscles, the mistake to avoid on the toilet, and why Dr Kelly Casperson, a urologist who works with women through perimenopause and menopause, says they aren't right for everyone → Pilates, weights and the jumping — why reformer can be the way back into resistance training if you leak, and how to brace for a heavy lift without pushing down → Your bladder habits — what's normal, the bladder diary, what to do when the urge hits, and a fair test for your coffee → UTIs — why they turn up more often at this stage, where cranberry fits, and when to see your GP YOUR PELVIC FLOOR TOOLKIT — where to start this week: Find your pelvic floor by imagining you're stopping the flow of wee and holding in wind at the same time · Squeeze and lift, hold for a few seconds, then let it go completely · Do them every day · If you're leaking, or you've tried them before and nothing changed, see a pelvic floor physio · On heavy lifts, take a quick breath into your belly and brace all the way around your middle — never push down · If you leak or feel heaviness, lift your pelvic floor before the effort, breathe out as you go, and go a little lighter for now · Leave out the jumping for now if it brings on leaks, and build back up · Wee roughly every two to four hours during the day, and ideally no more than once a night · When the urge hits, stop, squeeze, breathe and walk calmly · If urgency is your main issue, try a fortnight with less coffee · If UTIs keep coming back, try cranberry tablets and talk to your GP · The National Continence Helpline is free: 1800 33 00 66 Small changes stack. You don't have to fix it all at once — you just have to start. If you've been crossing your legs before every sneeze, sitting out the trampoline, or reaching for the black leggings without thinking about why — please consider that you might simply be a woman who was never told how much can be done about it. You deserve to dance until the last song, jump with your kids, and laugh until you cry without crossing your legs first. ———————————————————— Ready to work with me? The Peri Protocol is my personalised coaching program for women in perimenopause and menopause. Apply here → www.kirstencookecoaching.com/apply Grab your free guide — download your free What the Peri? guide → www.kirstencookecoaching.com/free-guide Come say hi 🌸 Follow along on Instagram and Facebook @kirstencookecoaching — I'd love to hear what resonated with you. ———————————————————— Research referenced: Study of Women's Health Across the Nation (SWAN). Fact Sheets (2023) — urinary incontinence across the menopause transition. swanstudy.org Christmas MM, Iyer S, Daisy C, Maristany S, Letko J, Hickey M (2023). Menopause hormone therapy and urinary symptoms: a systematic review — Menopause Dumoulin C, Cacciari LP, Hay-Smith EJC (2018). Pelvic floor muscle training versus no treatment, or inactive control treatments, for urinary incontinence in women — Cochrane Database of Systematic Reviews Hay-Smith EJC et al. (2024). Comparisons of approaches to pelvic floor muscle training for urinary incontinence in women — Cochrane Database of Systematic Reviews Gonzaga S et al. (2024). Comparative analysis of pelvic floor muscle training and Pilates in managing urinary incontinence among postmenopausal women: a randomized controlled trial — International Urogynecology Journal Prevett C, Moore R (2024). Nuances of the Valsalva manoeuvre and bracing with regard to resistance training performance and its effects on the pelvic floor — Journal of Pelvic, Obstetric and Gynaecological Physiotherapy Kistler-Fischbacher M, Weeks BK, Beck BR (2025). Bone-targeted high-intensity training does not reduce quality of life related to pelvic floor dysfunction: the MEDEX-OP randomized controlled trial — International Urogynecology Journal Funada S et al. (2023). Bladder training for treating overactive bladder in adults — Cochrane Database of Systematic Reviews Williams G, Stothart CI, Hahn D, Stephens JH, Craig JC, Hodson EM (2023). Cranberries for preventing urinary tract infections — Cochrane Database of Systematic Reviews Dr Kelly Casperson — You Are Not Broken podcast, and her work with women Jean Hailes for Women's Health — Bladder health; Your pelvic floor: the forgotten muscles? Continence Health Australia — Menopause and incontinence; Pelvic Floor First Note: If you're leaking, getting up a lot at night, feeling a heaviness or dragging down below, or getting UTIs that keep coming back, please see your GP or a pelvic floor physiotherapist. The National Continence Helpline is free and confidential on 1800 33 00 66. This podcast is for educational purposes only and does not constitute medical advice. Always consult a qualified healthcare practitioner for personal medical decisions.

    Perimenopause & Your Pelvic Floor — Leaking, Urgency & What Actually Helps (Ep 12)

  3. Oct 2

    Perimenopause & Supplements - What's Actually Worth Your Money (Ep 11)

    (Ep 11) You're standing in the vitamin aisle at the chemist with a basket on your arm, stopped in front of a wall of bottles. Some of them say women's on the front. Some of them say menopause. Some have the word hormone printed somewhere on the label. And every one of them looks like it might be the thing that's been missing. Then you get home, open the cupboard, and there they are — the bottles you've already bought. Half of one, a third of another, and one you took for a fortnight before it slid to the back and got forgotten. You paid good money for every one of them. And if somebody asked you today whether any of them did anything, you couldn't honestly tell them. I've been in health and fitness for nearly thirty years, and over that time I've watched supplement fads come and go. Something is everywhere for a year or two, and then it quietly drops off the shelves and something new takes its place. But one has stood the test of time the whole way through, and that one is creatine. The first time I tried it, years ago, it didn't suit me. I did a loading phase — a big dose every day for a short stretch — and I felt four to five kilos heavier from all the water it pulled into my muscles. So I stopped. These days I take about five to seven grams a day, every day, with no water retention at all. Same powder, different dose. So this week I'm paying last week's promise and doing supplements — but only the ones I think are worth your money, how much of each, and how to buy them well. Food first, every time, and supplements for the gaps that food on its own isn't filling. And creatine gets the most time, because outside of HRT, I believe it's the strongest supplement there is. One promise before you start: this isn't an episode about things to feel guilty for buying. In this episode: → The wall of bottles — why the supplement aisle is one of the most confusing places to stand at this stage of life, and why it stings when nothing seems to change → Food first — why variety matters so much, how much of what Australians eat is now ultra-processed, and where the gaps open up → What creatine actually is and how it works — the flat-battery explanation, why it isn't a hormone or a steroid, and the loading phase explained → Three doses for three purposes — the everyday dose for muscle and strength, the higher dose for your bones that only works alongside training, and the short-term dose for your brain in the rough patches → Buying creatine well — what Dr Darren Candow, the researcher I trust most on creatine, says to look for on the label, and why it's one of the cheaper things you can buy → Vitamin D — why so many of us are low, what indoor lives, winter and daily sunscreen have to do with it, and its partner, calcium → Omega-3 — why farmed salmon isn't quite what it used to be, which fish to reach for in Australia, and the plant-based option if you're vegan or vegetarian → Iron — why heavy periods matter, why you test before you take it, and how a coffee can cut what you absorb by about half → A quick round-up — magnesium, the natural options for hot flushes, and the cheapest pre-workout there is, which is probably already in your kitchen YOUR SUPPLEMENT TOOLKIT — where to start this week: Start creatine — plain creatine monohydrate powder, three to five grams a day, every day · Over fifty, around seven to eight grams · Look for Creapure on the label, and make sure it's been independently tested · Don't load — your everyday dose fills your muscles in about four weeks · The bone dose, eight to twelve grams, only works alongside training · Around twenty grams for a few days in a rough patch, then straight back to your everyday dose · Mostly indoors, wearing SPF thirty or fifty every day, or it's winter where you live? Consider vitamin D, about 1,000 to 2,000 IU a day with a meal that has a bit of fat in it · Look to your plate first for calcium · Oily fish two or three times a week, or a good marine-source omega-3, or algal oil if you're vegan or vegetarian · If your periods are heavy, get your iron checked, and if you need iron, take it with vitamin C, well away from your coffee or tea Small changes stack. You don't have to fix it all at once — you just have to start. If your cupboard is full of half-finished bottles, please consider that you might simply be a woman who was trying to look after herself, and was never told which ones were worth it. There's nothing silly about that. You don't need a longer list. You need a shorter one, with the reasons attached. --- Ready to work with me? The Peri Protocol is my personalised coaching program for women in perimenopause and menopause. Apply here → www.kirstencookecoaching.com/apply Grab your free guide — download your free What the Peri? guide → www.kirstencookecoaching.com/free-guide Come say hi 🌸 Follow along on Instagram and Facebook @kirstencookecoaching — I'd love to hear what resonated with you. --- Research referenced: Candow DG, Ostojic SM, Forbes SC, Antonio J (2024). Does one dose of creatine supplementation fit all? — Advances in Exercise and Health Science Chilibeck PD, Candow DG et al. (2023) — Medicine & Science in Sports & Exercise. Two years of creatine monohydrate with resistance training and walking in postmenopausal women Dos Santos EEP et al. (2021) — Nutrients. Meta-analysis of creatine monohydrate trials in older and postmenopausal women Hall et al. (2025) — Journal of the International Society of Sports Nutrition. Creatine monohydrate in perimenopausal and postmenopausal women Tran V et al. (2025). Effect of daily sunscreen application on vitamin D: the Sun-D Trial — British Journal of Dermatology Minihane AM (2025). Omega-3 fatty acids, brain health and the menopause — Post Reproductive Health Wilson et al. (2025). Women who experience heavy menstrual bleeding: prevalence and characteristics from young adulthood to midlife, Australia, 2000–2021 — Medical Journal of Australia von Siebenthal HK et al. (2023). Effect of dietary factors and time of day on iron absorption from oral iron supplements in iron deficient women — American Journal of Hematology Australian Bureau of Statistics (2022–24). National Health Measures Survey — vitamin D Deakin University Institute for Health Transformation (2025) — ultra-processed food in the Australian diet Nutrient Reference Values for Australia and New Zealand — National Health and Medical Research Council Note: This episode is a guide to what's worth your money, not personal advice. If you take medication, have a health condition, or aren't sure what's right for you, please talk to your GP or pharmacist before starting a new supplement — and get your iron checked before you take it. This podcast is for educational purposes only and does not constitute medical advice. Always consult a qualified healthcare practitioner for personal medical decisions. If food, eating or body image is causing you distress, the Butterfly Foundation National Helpline is 1800 33 4673, 8am to midnight AEST, seven days a week, free and confidential. If you're experiencing a mental health crisis, please contact Lifeline on 13 11 14 (Australia).

    Perimenopause & Supplements - What's Actually Worth Your Money (Ep 11)

  4. Sep 25

    Perimenopause & Protein - What You Need & Why It Matters More Now (Ep 10)

    (Ep 10) You've heard that protein matters at this stage of life, so you've done something about it. A poached egg on your toast in the morning, next to your coffee, and the box feels ticked. Nothing silly about that at all — you did exactly what the message told you to do. What the message never told you was how much. One egg is about six grams of protein. What I'd want to see in a meal at this stage of life is closer to thirty. So that egg, the one you went to the trouble of adding, is covering about a fifth of what that breakfast needs to do. I ran short on protein myself for years, and knowing better made no difference to it at all. I was teaching class after class, training clients, and watching my calories the way we were all taught to. And that's the bigger problem underneath the egg — for a very long time the only advice handed to women was to cut your calories and move more. We pulled that lever hard. And when you cut your food, the protein comes down with everything else, because it doesn't get a special pass just for being important. So this week I'm doing protein properly, and I owe you two things: a number, and a reason. Your muscle starts coming off from about two years before your final period and keeps going until roughly two years after it — that's a run of about four years, and it lines up with your hormones, not with a birthday. Lifting is how you build muscle back. Protein is what you build it out of. Do the hard part and skip the easy part, and you're leaving results on the table. One promise before you start: nothing in this episode asks you to eat less. In this episode: → The one poached egg — why adding something isn't the same as adding enough, and the gap between what a food weighs and how much protein is inside it → Why protein matters more now than it did ten years ago — and why the timing lines up with your hormones rather than your age → Protein protects what you've got, and protein plus lifting builds more — including what protein is still doing on the days you don't train → Why it keeps you fuller than carbohydrate does, and why stacking it earlier in the day makes the afternoon so much quieter → The ladder — a gram per kilo as your floor, more if you're lifting, more again if you're training heavy, and the one number that's worth remembering → Where it goes wrong across an ordinary day — breakfast running on almost nothing while dinner carries the lot → After you train you've got hours, not minutes — and what Dr Stacy Sims recommends from her work with women → What thirty grams actually looks like — chicken, steak, tuna, salmon, eggs, dairy, tofu, tempeh, beans and the vegan options, with the grams attached → The yoghurt shelf — why "Greek-style" can mean almost anything in Australia, and the tub that gives you the same protein for a fifth of the calories YOUR PROTEIN TOOLKIT — where to start this week: Work out your number — your weight in kilos is your minimum in grams a day · More if you're lifting, somewhere around 1.2 to 1.6 grams per kilo · Aim for about thirty grams in a meal · Start with breakfast, because that's the meal where it goes missing · Two whole eggs and four or five egg whites is about thirty grams for around 225 calories · A palm-sized piece of chicken, two small tins of tuna, or a tin and a half of beans, all get you there · Read the protein line on one label you already buy, and ignore the front of the packet · If you have kidney disease, diabetes or high blood pressure, have a chat with your GP or an accredited practising dietitian before you push your protein up Small changes stack. You don't have to fix it all at once — you just have to start. If you've been quietly wondering why the work isn't showing, or you've been told for years that the answer is to eat less — please consider that you might simply be a woman who was never given the numbers. Nobody expects you to have known how many grams of protein were in a tub of yoghurt. This is one place where the answer isn't less. It's more. — — — Ready to work with me? The Peri Protocol is my personalised coaching program for women in perimenopause and menopause. Apply here → www.kirstencookecoaching.com/apply Grab your free guide — download your free What the Peri? guide → www.kirstencookecoaching.com/free-guide Come say hi 🌸 Follow along on Instagram and Facebook @kirstencookecoaching — I'd love to hear what resonated with you. — — — Research referenced: Greendale GA et al. (2019). Changes in body composition and weight during the menopause transition — JCI Insight Morton RW et al. (2018). A systematic review, meta-analysis and meta-regression of the effect of protein supplementation on resistance training-induced gains in muscle mass and strength in healthy adults — British Journal of Sports Medicine Nunes EA et al. (2022). Systematic review and meta-analysis of protein intake to support muscle mass and function in healthy adults — Journal of Cachexia, Sarcopenia and Muscle Tagawa R et al. (2022). Synergistic effect of increased total protein intake and strength training on muscle strength — Sports Medicine – Open Schoenfeld BJ and Aragon AA (2018). How much protein can the body use in a single meal for muscle-building? — Journal of the International Society of Sports Nutrition de Branco FMS et al. (2019). Protein timing after resistance training in postmenopausal women — Clinical Nutrition Dhillon J et al. (2016). The effects of increased protein intake on fullness: a meta-analysis and its limitations — Journal of the Academy of Nutrition and Dietetics Devries MC et al. (2018). Changes in kidney function do not differ between healthy adults consuming higher- compared with lower- or normal-protein diets — Journal of Nutrition Shams-White MM et al. (2017). Dietary protein and bone health: a systematic review and meta-analysis — American Journal of Clinical Nutrition Noakes M (2018). Protein Balance: new concepts for protein in weight management — CSIRO Nutrient Reference Values for Australia and New Zealand — National Health and Medical Research Council Australian Food Composition Database — Food Standards Australia New Zealand Note: This episode is about feeding the body you've got, not about being smaller. If your weight, your eating or the way you feel about your body has become distressing, please talk to someone. This podcast is for educational purposes only and does not constitute medical advice. Always consult a qualified healthcare practitioner for personal medical decisions. If food, eating or body image is causing you distress, the Butterfly Foundation National Helpline is 1800 33 4673, 8am to midnight AEST, seven days a week, free and confidential. If you're experiencing a mental health crisis, please contact Lifeline on 13 11 14 (Australia).

    Perimenopause & Protein - What You Need & Why It Matters More Now (Ep 10)

  5. Sep 18

    Perimenopause & Exercise - The 3 Jobs Nobody Told You About (Ep 9)

    (Ep 9) You've been doing the same thing for a year. You trained through Christmas, and through the cold of Winter, and right through the school holidays. You did not miss a session. And at the end of that whole year, you feel like you have very little to show for it. Or it looks nothing like that at all — you haven't trained in years, you've had a go at starting three times already, and each time the body didn't answer the way it used to. Two completely different women, handed exactly the same piece of advice. Move more, and eat less. That was me too, from the other side of it. There were weeks where my alarm went off at 4.15am so I could be teaching a class by 5.30am — 12 to 15 high-intensity classes a week, plus my clients and my Pilates. When my body changed in my forties I did what nearly thirty years in this industry had taught me to do. I ate less. I trained more. Nothing happened. What was missing wasn't knowledge and it wasn't effort. It was a name. Nobody ever said the word perimenopause to me. So this week I'm doing exercise, properly. At twenty-five, one kind of training quietly covered your fitness, your weight, your bones, your muscle and your mood, all at once. That's over — and it isn't because you got lazy or got old. There are three separate jobs now, and no single kind of exercise does all three. One promise before you start: nothing in this episode asks you to give up something you love. In this episode: → What this actually feels like — a year of turning up with very little to show for it, and the woman who can't face walking into a gym at all → The two clocks — why muscle is a slow leak and bone is a cliff, and why both pick up pace right now → The three jobs — build and defend your muscle, keep your bones, look after your fat and your heart → Bone doesn't care how tired you get, it cares how heavy the weight is — including the study done here on the Gold Coast → Cardio versus weights, settled — what each one is for, why "toned" has two ingredients, and what to eat before you train YOUR TRAINING TOOLKIT — where to start this week: Two strength sessions a week, heavier than last time · Compound movements — squats, hinges, pushes, pulls, presses and carries · The last couple of repetitions genuinely in doubt · Rest at least two to three minutes between sets · A thousand more steps a day, not ten thousand · Add one fast thing · Don't train on an empty stomach · Give it eight weeks Small changes stack. You don't have to fix it all at once — you just have to start. If you've spent this year quietly deciding that you've lost the discipline you used to have, or that your body has stopped answering you — please consider that you might simply be a woman who was handed one lever and told to pull it harder. You didn't fail at this. You don't need to work harder. You need to work in different places, and nobody told you the job had changed.   Ready to work with me? The Peri Protocol is my personalised coaching program for women in perimenopause and menopause. Apply here → www.kirstencookecoaching.com/apply Grab your free guide — download your free What the Peri? guide → www.kirstencookecoaching.com/free-guide Come say hi 🌸 Follow along on Instagram and Facebook @kirstencookecoaching — I'd love to hear what resonated with you.   Research referenced: Greendale GA et al. (2012). Bone mineral density loss in relation to the final menstrual period — Journal of Bone and Mineral Research Khalafi M et al. (2023). The effects of exercise training on body composition in postmenopausal women — Frontiers in Endocrinology Isenmann E et al. (2026). It's never too late: resistance training, strength and body composition in females across the lifespan — Journal of Science and Medicine in Sport Watson SL et al. (2018). High-intensity resistance and impact training improves bone mineral density and physical function in postmenopausal women — the LIFTMOR trial, Journal of Bone and Mineral Research Kemmler W et al. (2015). Exercise and fractures in postmenopausal women — Erlangen Fitness and Osteoporosis Prevention Study, Osteoporosis International Note: This episode is about what your training needs to do now — not about being smaller. If your weight, your eating or the way you feel about your body has become distressing, please talk to someone. And if you have pelvic floor symptoms, a prolapse or a bone density diagnosis, see a practitioner who works in that area before you lift heavy. This podcast is for educational purposes only and does not constitute medical advice. Always consult a qualified healthcare practitioner for personal medical decisions. If food, eating or body image is causing you distress, the Butterfly Foundation National Helpline is 1800 33 4673, 8am to midnight AEST, seven days. If you're experiencing a mental health crisis, please contact Lifeline on 13 11 14 (Australia).

    Perimenopause & Exercise - The 3 Jobs Nobody Told You About (Ep 9)

  6. Sep 11

    The Mid Section Weight Gain (Ep 8)

    You haven't changed a thing. Not one thing. You're eating the way you've always eaten and moving the way you've always moved, and somewhere in the last year or two your body has quietly rearranged itself. Jeans that still do up, but sit somewhere new. A dress you've worn for years that suddenly needs smoothing down before you walk out the door. Closing the bathroom door now when you shower, because you're too embarrassed for your partner to see you undressed. Dreading shopping for a wedding outfit, or worse, a swimsuit. Saying no to the event, and no to the day at the beach. And the scales, which you'd think would explain all of it, telling you almost nothing has changed. That was me, with nearly thirty years in this industry behind me. I ate well. I trained harder than almost any woman my age I knew. And none of it made the slightest difference — and it wasn't confusion, because I knew exactly what I was looking at. It was disappointment, and a sense of injustice that for all that work it simply wasn't showing. What I couldn't name, for years, was why. Nobody ever said the word perimenopause to me. So this week I'm doing the big one. Where the weight actually goes in perimenopause and why it heads for your middle. What's ageing and what's menopause, because they are not the same thing. Why eating less and doing more cardio is the combination that costs you most right now. And what genuinely helps instead. One promise before you start: there is nothing in this episode about eating less. In this episode: → What it actually feels like — the changing room, the bathroom door, the swimsuit, and the point where you start saying no to things → Where the fat goes, and why — and how oestrogen was quietly directing the traffic all along → Why the scales stopped telling you anything useful — you're gaining fat and losing muscle at once, and the number can't see either → Age adds it, menopause moves it — and why that distinction changes everything → What's pouring petrol on the fire — eating less, doing more cardio, and the diet cycle that hands you more body fat at the same weight every time → What actually helps — protein, fibre, sleep, fasting, hormone therapy, and three things to start this week YOUR MID-SECTION TOOLKIT — where to start this week: Change what you're measuring — clothes, photographs, strength, and a tape measure round your middle once a month · Demote the scales, don't bin them · Protein at breakfast · One extra serve a day of vegetables, beans or wholegrains · One change to your sleep, and only one · Stop cutting calories as your opening move Small changes stack. You don't have to fix it all at once — you just have to start. If you've spent the last few years quietly deciding that you've let yourself go, or lost your discipline, or that something in you is broken — please consider that you might simply be a woman whose hormones changed the rules underneath her without telling her. You didn't do anything stupid. You did what you were taught to do. The instructions changed, and nobody sent you the new ones. ─────────── Ready to work with me? The Peri Protocol is my personalised coaching program for women in perimenopause and menopause. Apply here → www.kirstencookecoaching.com/apply Grab your free guide — download your free What the Peri? guide → www.kirstencookecoaching.com/free-guide Come say hi 🌸 Follow along on Instagram and Facebook @kirstencookecoaching — I'd love to hear what resonated with you. ─────────── Research referenced: Greendale GA et al. (2019). Changes in body composition and weight during the menopause transition — JCI Insight Pontzer H et al. (2021). Daily energy expenditure through the human life course — Science van Gemert WA et al. (2015). Effect of diet with or without exercise on body composition in postmenopausal women — SHAPE-2 Jóźwiak B et al. (2024). Exercise alone and with time-restricted eating in menopausal women — Journal of Translational Medicine Note: This episode is about where fat moves and why — not about being smaller. If your weight, your eating or the way you feel about your body has become distressing, please talk to someone. This podcast is for educational purposes only and does not constitute medical advice. Always consult a qualified healthcare practitioner for personal medical decisions. If food, eating or body image is causing you distress, the Butterfly Foundation National Helpline is 1800 33 4673, 8am to midnight AEST, seven days. If you're experiencing a mental health crisis, please contact Lifeline on 13 11 14 (Australia).

    The Mid Section Weight Gain (Ep 8)

  7. Aug 28

    Perimenopause & Mental Health - Mood, Anxiety, Depression & The Mental Load (Ep 7)

    (Ep 7) You get through the day. But you are not the woman you were, and you cannot work out where she went. The sadness that turns up with no reason attached. The rage that goes off before you can stop it, and the guilt at eleven o'clock that night. The days you feel nothing at all — not upset, just flat. And the swinging between all of it, with no warning and no pattern, until you genuinely start to wonder whether you're losing your mind. You love your family completely — and you also want everyone to stop needing something from you for five minutes, and you feel horrendous for wanting it. And underneath it all, the question nobody can answer: how long is this going to last? That was my life for years. The hardest part wasn't any single symptom — it was that I didn't feel like myself, and I had no idea how long it would go on. I was prescribed antidepressants, more than once, and not one person asked a single question about my hormones. It took me about three years to work out what was actually happening. This week I'm going to the emotional side of perimenopause — the part that does the real damage. What's happening in your brain chemistry and why it's the swinging that hurts, not so much the low. How to tell hormonal mood changes apart from clinical depression. What to ask for at your next appointment so you don't lose the years I lost. And what genuinely helps. In this episode: → What it actually feels like — the rage that arrives before you can stop it, and the anxiety in women who've never been anxious → Anhedonia — why you can be clinically depressed without ever feeling sad, and why so many of us get told "you don't seem depressed" → What's happening chemically — why erratic hormones do more damage to your mood than low ones → What to ask for — and the one question that changes the appointment → What actually helps — what the guidelines really say about lifestyle before medication YOUR MOOD TOOLKIT — where to start this week: Name it out loud to one person, in the true version · Ten minutes of daylight within an hour of waking · Two sessions that make your muscles work — strength training came out better for women than men · Book the appointment and ask "could this be perimenopause as well?" · Ask for your thyroid, iron and ferritin, and B12 Small changes stack. You don't have to fix it all at once — you just have to start. If you've spent months, or years, quietly believing you've become a worse person — angrier, colder, smaller — please consider that you might simply be a woman whose chemistry changed underneath her without anyone telling her it would. You have not lost your warmth. It's still there. ─────────── Ready to work with me? The Peri Protocol is my personalised coaching program for women in perimenopause and menopause. Apply here → www.kirstencookecoaching.com/apply Grab your free guide — download your free What the Peri? guide → www.kirstencookecoaching.com/free-guide Come say hi 🌸 Follow along on Instagram and Facebook @kirstencookecoaching — I'd love to hear what resonated with you. ─────────── Research referenced: Badawy Y et al. (2024). The risk of depression in the menopausal stages: a systematic review and meta-analysis — J Affective Disorders Malhi GS et al. (2021). The 2020 RANZCP clinical practice guidelines for mood disorders — ANZ Journal of Psychiatry Noetel M et al. (2024). Effect of exercise for depression — BMJ Senate Community Affairs References Committee (2024). Issues related to menopause and perimenopause — Parliament of Australia Note: Perimenopause raises the risk of depression, and mood changes are often the first sign. If your low mood is persistent rather than fluctuating, see your GP — and ask about your hormones as well, not instead. This podcast is for educational purposes only and is not medical advice. Always consult a qualified healthcare practitioner for personal medical decisions. If you're struggling, please reach out — Lifeline 13 11 14 or Beyond Blue 1300 22 4636 (Australia), both 24 hours a day.

    Perimenopause & Mental Health - Mood, Anxiety, Depression & The Mental Load (Ep 7)

  8. Aug 21

    Brain Fog & Perimenopause - You're Not Losing Your Mind! (Ep 6)

    (Ep 6) Have you ever been mid-sentence — mid-thought — and had the whole thing simply vanish? Not slip away and come back a moment later. Gone. Or walked into a room and had no idea why you were there? Or reached for the simplest word — banana, fork, the name of someone you’ve known for years — and found nothing there at all? For months, that was my every day. It honestly felt like someone had invaded my brain overnight — this sharp, capable brain I’d built a whole career on, suddenly not mine anymore. And the hardest part wasn’t the forgetting itself. It was the frustration of grasping for a word that just would not come while everyone waited, and the quiet loneliness of holding it all together on the outside while, on the inside, I no longer recognised the person I’d become — and for all my trying, could do nothing to control it or make it stop. It took me a long time to understand what was really going on. It’s hormonal. It has a name. And for the vast majority of us, it’s temporary. This week I’m pulling perimenopausal brain fog apart properly — because it’s one of the most frightening symptoms and one of the most misunderstood, and it does not stay politely in the background. This isn’t “just push through and hope it passes.” It’s what’s actually happening in your brain, why it goes after your words specifically, how to tell it apart from Alzheimer’s, and a real toolkit for getting your sharpness back — everything from what you can change this week to the honest long-term picture almost nobody talks about. It’s the episode I wish someone had handed me before I lost months to the fear. In this episode: → What brain fog actually feels like — at home and at work: the blank rooms, the words that vanish mid-sentence, the paragraph you read five times, and the invisible exhaustion nobody around you can see → What’s really happening in your brain — oestrogen’s role across your memory and focus, and why your brain is recalibrating on less fuel, not breaking down → Why it’s almost certainly NOT early dementia — the three clear ways to tell the difference, and when to see your GP anyway → The honest long-term picture — the higher Alzheimer’s risk in women, and the genuinely hopeful flip side: up to about 45% of dementia risk is within your control → What pours petrol on the fog — sleep loss, stress, low iron or B12, an underactive thyroid, alcohol and ultra-processed food → What actually helps — protecting your sleep, lifting heavy for your brain (not just your body), eating for your brain, and lightening the invisible mental load → The one thing to start this week to feel a little more like yourself again YOUR BRAIN-FOG TOOLKIT — where to start this week: Protect your sleep first · Lift heavy two or three times a week and move your body daily · Eat for your brain — protein, oily fish, and 25–30g of fibre · Ask your GP to check your ferritin and iron, your B12 and your thyroid · Get it out of your head and onto paper, without shame · Have the honest conversation about your options with a practitioner who understands menopause Small changes stack. You don’t have to fix it all at once — you just have to start. If you’ve been quietly terrified that you’re losing your mind — you’re not. Your brain isn’t broken and it isn’t slipping away. It’s recalibrating, on less fuel than it’s used to, in the middle of a hormonal upheaval nobody warned you about — and for the vast majority of us, the sharpness comes back. You’re still in there. Your clever, capable brain is still in there. And there is a great deal you can do to help it. ─────────── Ready to work with me? The Peri Protocol is my personalised coaching program for women in perimenopause and menopause. Apply here → www.kirstencookecoaching.com/apply Grab your free guide — download your free What the Peri? guide → www.kirstencookecoaching.com/free-guide Come say hi 🌸 Follow along on Instagram and Facebook @kirstencookecoaching — I’d love to hear what resonated with you. ─────────── Research referenced: Greendale GA et al. (2009). Effects of the menopause transition and hormone use on cognitive performance in midlife women (SWAN) — Neurology Mosconi L et al. (2021). Menopause impacts human brain structure, connectivity, energy metabolism, and amyloid-beta deposition — Scientific Reports Maki PM et al. (2022). Brain fog in menopause: a health-care professional’s guide for decision-making and counseling on cognition — Climacteric Livingston G et al. (2024). Dementia prevention, intervention, and care: 2024 report of the Lancet standing Commission — The Lancet Note: Perimenopausal brain fog is extremely common and, for most women, temporary. This episode isn’t a substitute for assessment — if your memory changes are severe, steadily worsening, or frightening the people around you, please see your GP. This podcast is for educational purposes only and does not constitute medical advice. Always consult a qualified healthcare practitioner for personal medical decisions. If you’re experiencing a mental health crisis, please contact Lifeline on 13 11 14 (Australia).

    Brain Fog & Perimenopause - You're Not Losing Your Mind! (Ep 6)
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About

You're not going crazy. You're not broken. And no — it's not "just stress." Somewhere in your 40s or 50s, your body starts doing things nobody warned you about — the weight that won't shift, the broken sleep, the brain fog, the anxiety from nowhere, the feeling that you've lost yourself. And when you finally go looking for answers, too often you're dismissed, brushed off, or sent away still confused. What the Peri? is the podcast for women navigating perimenopause and menopause who are done being dismissed and just need someone to make it all make sense. Each episode cuts through the noise, the myths and the medical gaslighting — with honest conversations, real science, and plain-English answers about your hormones, your symptoms, and what actually helps. I'm Kirsten Cooke — a personal trainer, women's health coach, perimenopause and menopause coach, and mum of four. I'm not talking to you from the outside looking in; I'm walking this road myself. These are the conversations I wish someone had sat me down and had with me years ago. You are not imagining it. It is not your fault. And you are not alone. The change you didn't ask for. The conversations you need.  Follow now so you don't miss an episode.

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