Let's Talk Divorce

Catherine Cooke

Let's Talk Divorce is the podcast for anyone navigating separation, divorce or co-parenting. Join Catherine Cooke, Divorce Coach and Family Mediator, for honest conversations, practical advice and expert insights to help you feel more informed, more confident and less alone. With solo episodes and guest interviews, we'll explore the emotional and practical realities of family change, from deciding what to do next to rebuilding life after divorce and creating healthier co-parenting relationships.

Episodes

  1. 1d ago

    Let's Talk....About How to Tell Your Spouse You Want a Divorce

    Telling your spouse that you want a divorce can feel like one of the hardest conversations you'll ever have. Even when you've thought about leaving for months, or years. Actually saying the words can feel very different. In this episode of Let's Talk Divorce, I talk about how to prepare for that conversation, how to approach it clearly and respectfully, and what to expect afterwards. I also look at the important difference between a conversation that's going to be emotionally difficult and one where there may be genuine concerns about your safety. In this episode: How to know whether you're ready to have the conversation or still working out what you wantWhy getting clear on your reasons matters, without feeling you have to prove your casePractical things to think about before telling your spouseHow to think about safety if you're worried about your spouse's reactionChoosing the right time and place to have the conversationWhat you might actually say when you've decided you want to separateDealing with shock, anger, blame, bargaining and promises to changeWhat to think about before telling your children, family and friendsThe emotional aftermath — including relief, guilt, grief and second-guessing yourselfWhich professionals might support you as you work out what happens nextWhether you've made the decision to leave or you're approaching the point where you know this conversation needs to happen, this episode will help you think about how to handle it as clearly, respectfully and safely as your circumstances allow. Questioning whether you are ready to leave and support through that process is something I support clients with. For more support and free guides, check out my website: www.rightstepcoaching.co.uk Keywords: telling your spouse you want a divorce, how to ask for a divorce, leaving a marriage, separation advice, considering divorce, divorce conversation, preparing for separation, divorce coach, family mediation, divorce support, ending a marriage, early stages of divorce, separation support, divorce podcast, England and Wales. Safety Advice: If you are worried about your safety, please get support. https://www.nhs.uk/live-well/getting-help-for-domestic-violence/ Disclaimer: This episode provides general information and guidance and is not a substitute for legal or therapeutic advice. If you're concerned that telling your spouse you want to separate could put you or your children at risk, seek specialist domestic abuse support and advice before having the conversation. Every situation is different, and you should seek advice appropriate to your own circumstances.

  2. Sep 11

    Let's Talk.... Divorce Guilt

    Divorce guilt can show up at every stage of separation. Before you leave, while you're going through divorce and long after the relationship itself has ended. In this episode of Let's Talk Divorce, I explore the different ways guilt can affect the decisions we make. From feeling guilty about leaving and worrying about the impact on your children, to taking responsibility for your ex's emotions, feeling bad about setting boundaries, and even experiencing guilt when life starts to feel good again. I also look at an important question: does feeling guilty actually mean you've done something wrong? In this episode: The difference between feeling guilty and actually doing something wrong The guilt that can keep you stuck when you're considering leaving Worrying about the impact of separation on your children Guilt when you're the person who chose to end the marriage Blaming yourself when the decision to divorce wasn't yours Why guilt can affect the decisions you make during divorce Feeling guilty for setting boundaries with your ex Co-parenting guilt and taking responsibility for things you can't control Why you might feel guilty when you finally start feeling happy again How to recognise when responsibility is genuinely yours - and when you're carrying something that isn't Whether you're quietly questioning your marriage, going through a divorce or trying to co-parent and rebuild your life afterwards, this episode will help you look at the guilt you're carrying and ask whether it really belongs to you. For more support and free guides, check out my website: www.rightstepcoaching.co.uk Keywords: divorce guilt, guilt after separation, leaving a marriage, divorce coach, guilt about children and divorce, co-parenting guilt, difficult divorce, divorce support, separation support, family mediation, divorce emotions, moving on after divorce, divorce podcast, England and Wales. Disclaimer: This episode provides general information and guidance and is not a substitute for legal or therapeutic advice. Every situation is different, and you should seek advice appropriate to your own circumstances.

  3. Sep 4

    Let's Talk..... Real Life Divorce Stories ('B')

    Many people assume that if a marriage isn't unhappy, divorce should be straightforward. But leaving is rarely simple, even when it's the right decision. In this episode of Let's Talk Divorce, I talk to 'B', who was married for 13 years in what she describes as a relatively happy relationship. She shares what led her to the decision to leave anyway, what it was like to tell her husband. 'B' talks of some of the challenges she faced during a difficult divorce, including his poor behaviour which was occasionally abusive. She talks honestly about the lessons she learned along the way, and how she and her child now have two happy parents, living separate, settled lives. Making the decision to leave a marriage that started out wellPlanning to tell your partner it's overNavigating a divorce that didn't go smoothlyProtecting your peace and your children when things get difficultThe lessons learned along the wayWhy two happy, separate parents can be better for a child than one unhappy householdRebuilding a life after leaving Whether you're quietly questioning a marriage that looks okay on paper, in the middle of a difficult separation, or trying to rebuild afterwards, this episode is a reminder that it is possible to come out the other side, settled, and happier. For more support and free guides check out my website www.rightstepcoaching.co.uk Keywords: leaving a happy marriage, divorce coach, difficult divorce, co-parenting after separation, family mediation, child wellbeing, divorce support, family separation, emotional wellbeing, divorce podcast, England and Wales. Disclaimer: This episode provides general information and guidance and is not a substitute for legal or therapeutic advice. Every situation is different, and you should seek advice appropriate to your own circumstances.

  4. Aug 28

    Let's Talk... What Children Need During Divorce

    One of the biggest fears parents have when they're questioning their relationship or going through divorce is this: "What will this do to my children?" In this episode of Let's Talk Divorce, I explore what children really need before, during and after separation. Drawing on my experience as a former primary headteacher, qualified family mediator and divorce coach, I share what research tells us about how children experience divorce, along with practical advice to help you support them through family change. You'll hear why it's not divorce itself that has the greatest impact on children, but the conflict surrounding it, and why you don't have to be a perfect parent to help your children thrive. Whether staying together is always best for the childrenWhat research tells us about children and divorceWhy children often notice more than parents realiseThe five things children really need during family changeHow to talk to children about separation in an age-appropriate wayWhy routines and consistency help children feel secureSupporting your children through co-parentingWhy looking after yourself is part of looking after your childrenWhether you're still questioning your relationship, navigating separation or already co-parenting, this episode will help you focus on what matters most. For more support and free guides check out my website www.rightstepcoaching.co.uk Keywords: children and divorce, helping children through divorce, separation and children, co-parenting, parenting after divorce, talking to children about divorce, family mediation, divorce coach, child wellbeing, divorce support, family separation, child arrangements, emotional wellbeing, difficult co-parenting, divorce podcast, England and Wales. Disclaimer: This episode provides general information and guidance and is not a substitute for legal or therapeutic advice. Every family is different, and if you have concerns about your own circumstances, you should seek advice appropriate to your situation.

  5. Aug 21

    Let's Talk....School After Separation; What Co-Parents Need to Know

    Back to school can be a bigger transition for separated families than people expect. New routines, school communications, uniforms, handovers and parents' evenings can all become sources of stress when two households are involved. In this episode of Let's Talk Divorce, I look at how separated parents can make the school year run more smoothly by getting organised early, keeping communication factual and making sure both parents have access to the information they need. I also talk about why schools should know when family circumstances have changed, what to do if communication with your co-parent is difficult, and why raising concerns early can often prevent bigger problems later. In this episode: Why back to school can feel more complicated after separation Why it's important to tell the school when your circumstances change What to actually say to school without oversharing Why both parents with parental responsibility should usually receive school information directly What to do if your co-parent isn't passing school information on Separate parents' evening appointments Practical ways to manage uniforms, school costs and equipment across two homes How to keep on top of school events, trips, forms and dates without relying on your co-parent Why simple systems can reduce unnecessary conflict Whether you've recently separated, you're already co-parenting across two homes, or school routines regularly become a source of conflict, this episode will help you put some structure around the practical side of school so that your child isn't caught in the middle. For more support and free guides, check out my website: www.rightstepcoaching.co.uk Keywords: school after divorce, back to school after separation, co-parenting and school, parental responsibility, school information for separated parents, parents evening after divorce, family mediation, difficult co-parenting, child arrangements, school communication after separation, divorce support, family separation, child wellbeing, divorce podcast, England and Wales. Disclaimer: This episode provides general information and guidance and is not a substitute for legal advice. School policies and individual circumstances may vary, and specific legal or safeguarding issues should be discussed with an appropriately qualified professional.

  6. Aug 14

    Let's Talk... How to Deal With a Difficult Coparent

    Do you feel like every message from your co-parent turns into an argument? Does seeing their name pop up on your phone instantly make you feel anxious, angry or exhausted? If so, you're not alone. In this episode of Let's Talk Divorce, I explore why difficult co-parenting isn't just about finding the perfect words to say. It's about understanding the patterns that keep you feeling reactive and learning how to take back control of your own peace. I share some of the most common co-parenting patterns I see as a family mediator and divorce coach, along with practical strategies you can start using straight away to help you communicate more calmly and confidently. Why better communication isn't always the answerThe 'Roundabout' pattern that keeps parents stuck in repeated conflictA simple Traffic Lights tool to help you decide when to respond and when to pauseWhy expecting your co-parent to change can leave you feeling powerlessHow setting healthy boundaries can actually increase conflict before things improveWhy your children don't need perfect co-parenting. They need one emotionally steady parent.Practical ways to protect your own peace while supporting your childrenIf you're tired of feeling like your co-parent controls your emotions, this episode is for you. If today's episode resonated with you, my Co-parenting Roadmap is designed to help you move beyond simply surviving difficult co-parenting. Over 12 weeks, I'll help you understand your triggers, communicate more effectively, set healthier boundaries and stop feeling like you're constantly reacting to your co-parent. Find out more here: https://www.rightstepcoaching.co.uk/coparenting-roadmap Keywords: difficult co-parenting, co-parenting after divorce, difficult ex, high-conflict co-parenting, communicating with your ex, child arrangements, separated parents, family mediation, divorce coach, parenting after separation, boundaries with an ex, co-parenting support, emotional triggers, family conflict, divorce podcast, parallel parenting, co-parenting communication, UK divorce,

  7. Aug 7

    Let's Talk....About the Family Home in a Divorce

    One of the biggest reasons people stay in unhappy relationships is fear of what will happen to the family home. Will I lose the house in a divorce? Will everything be split 50/50? What if my name isn't on the mortgage? Will my children have to move? In this episode of Let's Talk Divorce, I explore the emotional and practical realities of what can happen to the family home during separation and divorce. I separate common myths from reality and explain some of the key legal principles that many people don't know. This episode covers: Why the family home feels like so much more than bricks and mortarThe biggest fears that keep people stuckWhether everything is automatically split 50/50What happens if your name isn't on the mortgage or title deedsThe different options available for the family home after separationWhy understanding your options can reduce fear and help you make informed decisionsThe role family mediation can play in reaching agreements For free guides and support through questioning your relationship, separation or divorce, check out my website. www.rightstepcoaching.co.uk If you enjoyed this episode, please follow the podcast and leave a review. It really helps more people find these conversations when they need them most.Topics covered: family home after separation, what happens to the house in divorce, divorce finances, property settlement, financial settlements, 50/50 myths, title deeds, mortgage, family mediation, separation, divorce support, divorce coach, England and Wales. Please note: This episode provides general information for England and Wales only and is not legal advice. Every family's circumstances are different, so if you're unsure about your own situation, it's important to seek professional advice.

About

Let's Talk Divorce is the podcast for anyone navigating separation, divorce or co-parenting. Join Catherine Cooke, Divorce Coach and Family Mediator, for honest conversations, practical advice and expert insights to help you feel more informed, more confident and less alone. With solo episodes and guest interviews, we'll explore the emotional and practical realities of family change, from deciding what to do next to rebuilding life after divorce and creating healthier co-parenting relationships.