Strange Life

Daisy Vera Onubogu

Strange Life is a podcast about the hidden architectures shaping our minds, cultures, and identities. Hosted by hyperverbal autistic thinker and writer: Daisy Onubogu, each episode explores a different way of being human — from the wiring of neurodivergent brains, to the inheritance of Igbo culture, the scars of depression, the contradictions of 21st century womanhood and more. With sharp insight, Nigerian humour, and unapologetic autistic honesty, Strange Life looks at why society works the way it does, how history brought us here, and what other ways of living might be. Fortnightly updates!

Episodios

  1. Intersectionality

    21/10/2025

    Intersectionality

    Across this first season of Strange Life, we’ve met many of my selves — or rather, many aspects of one:The autistic one with learned patterns in place of reflexes.The Igbo one, shaped by ancestors and colonial ghosts.The ADHD one, chasing sparks and struggling in stillness.The 21st-century woman, performing a 12 000-year-old script.The traumatized one, re-wiring a spiky nervous system.The gifted one, both bright and burnt by her own voltage. Each episode turned one of these facets toward the light — examined it, questioned it, reframed it. But none of them exist alone. Each interacts with the others, transforms the others. That, in essence, is intersectionality: not addition, but chemistry. A concept coined by Kimberlé Crenshaw. To be autistic and Nigerian is not the same as being either alone.To be a gifted woman is not to be a gifted man with longer hair.To heal trauma within one culture may look like betrayal in another. Intersectionality is how those truths braid together. It shows us that identity is not a list of labels but a weave of forces — a living chemistry between internal wiring and external expectation. It’s why two people can live through the same event and walk away with entirely different readings of it. It’s why “who is the most oppressed?” is the wrong question, and “what is happening at this intersection?” is the right one. In this final episode of Season One, I try to map that weave — tracing how autism and ADHD merge into AuDHD; how womanhood and giftedness distort and refract each other; how trauma and heritage entangle across generations. And, ultimately, how intersectionality is not only an academic framework but a way of seeing — one that teaches us to recognize complexity with more precision, and each other with more care. Maybe that’s the invitation this season leaves you with:To look at yourself not in parts, but in patterns.To see how your intersections make you specifically, singularly, strangely you. 🧭 Further Reading & References Kimberlé Crenshaw, Mapping the Margins: Intersectionality, Identity Politics, and Violence Against Women of Color (1991) — PDF via Stanford:https://www.stanfordlawreview.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2010/04/Crenshaw_43_Stan_L_Rev_1241.pdf bell hooks, Ain’t I a Woman? (1981) : https://www.routledge.com/Aint-I-a-Woman-Black-Women-and-Feminism/hooks/p/book/9781138821514 Feminism is for Everybody (2000): https://www.routledge.com/Feminism-Is-for-Everybody-Passionate-Politics/hooks/p/book/9781138821620 Audre Lorde, Sister Outsider (1984) : https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/198292/sister-outsider-by-audre-lorde/ Patricia Hill Collins, Black Feminist Thought (1990) : https://www.routledge.com/Black-Feminist-Thought-Knowledge-Consciousness-and-the-Politics-of-Empowerment/Collins/p/book/9780415964722 Stuart Hall, Cultural Identity and Diaspora (1990) : https://www.open.ac.uk/cultural-identity-and-diaspora-stuart-hall.pdf Leah Lakshmi Piepzna-Samarasinha, Care Work: Dreaming Disability Justice (2018) : https://arsenalpulp.com/Books/C/Care-Work Bayo Akomolafe, These Wilds Beyond Our Fences (2017) : https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/600122/these-wilds-beyond-our-fences-by-bayo-akomolafe/ Sara Ahmed, Living a Feminist Life (2017) : https://www.dukeupress.edu/living-a-feminist-life Sami Schalk, Bodyminds Reimagined (2018) : https://www.dukeupress.edu/bodyminds-reimagined Moya Bailey, Misogynoir Transformed (2021): https://nyupress.org/9781479830376/misogynoir-transformed/ Ijeoma Oluo, So You Want to Talk About Race (2018): https://www.hachettebookgroup.com/titles/ijeoma-oluo/so-you-want-to-talk-about-race/9781580056779/ Kimberlé Crenshaw, TED Talk – https://www.ted.com/talks/kimberle_crenshaw_the_urgency_of_intersectionality

    13 min
  2. Womanhood Part 2 (Bonus Conversation Episode)

    30/09/2025 · CONTENIDO EXTRA

    Womanhood Part 2 (Bonus Conversation Episode)

    In short: Sara and I argue and giggle for AN HOUR AND FORTY MINUTES about Womanhood, What Trans and Cis women have in common, the origins of Patriarchy, Whether the Donald Trumps of this world are born or environmentally shaped, and more... it's pretty epic actually. The long version: In Episode 4 of Strange Life, I traced a bold story of how “womanhood” as we know it might have emerged in the shadow of a climate catastrophe 12,000 years ago — the Younger Dryas. But no hypothesis, however compelling, can stand without testing, pushback, and fresh perspectives. So for this bonus conversation, I invited someone whose mind I deeply admire: Sara Caplan — writer, musician with the band Chill Touch, member of UCB’s first all-trans/GNC/non-binary improv team, and a philosopher currently pursuing her Master’s at Cal State LA. Sara brings sharp analysis, humor, and a trans studies lens to everything from David Graeber deep dives to tabletop RPGs. Together we pull at the tangled threads of: How trans women fit into a 12,000-year “chain of survival and storytelling” that I called womanhood. Whether it’s really possible to trace patriarchy back to a single climate event — or whether domination arises from other patterns. The contradictions of wanting to abolish gender categories and cherish womanhood as solidarity and joy. The role of fathers, daughters, and generational shifts in reshaping power. Beauty practices as both subjugation and resistance. And the underrated through-line of humor — how comedy has always been one of patriarchy’s fiercest challengers. It’s a lively, sparky exchange — part philosophical duel, part collaborative storytelling. Sometimes we agreed, sometimes we wrestled with the differences, and in the process we both got clearer on what’s at stake when we talk about origins, oppression, and the possibility of change. If the first Womanhood episode was a map, this one is a campfire debate — full of laughter, sparks, and deep questioning. ✨ Listen in, and then take it further: share with a friend, sit down, and have your own version of this conversation. Because womanhood — however you define it — has always been carried forward in the stories we tell each other. 📚 Further Reading & Sources On Patriarchy & Its Origins The Patriarchs: How Men Came to Rule — Angela Saini (2023)https://www.angela-saini.co.uk/the-patriarchs The Dawn of Everything: A New History of Humanity — David Graeber & David Wengrow (2021)https://www.farrarstraus.com/books/the-dawn-of-everything/ “The Younger Dryas Impact Hypothesis” — NASA Earth Observatory explainer on sudden climate shiftshttps://earthobservatory.nasa.gov/features/YoungerDryas On Gender, Trans Studies & Womanhood Susan Stryker — Transgender History (2nd ed., 2017)https://bookshop.org/p/books/transgender-history-susan-stryker/8639719 Judith Butler — Gender Trouble: Feminism and the Subversion of Identity (1990, classic text)https://www.routledge.com/Gender-Trouble/Butler/p/book/9780415389556 María Lugones — Heterosexualism and the Colonial / Modern Gender System (2007) [PDF]https://www.ou.edu/content/dam/WGS/Documents/Reading%20Room/Lugones2007.pdf On Beauty, Power & Social Construction Caroline Criado Perez — Invisible Women: Data Bias in a World Designed for Men (2019)https://carolinecriadoperez.com/book/invisible-women/ Naomi Wolf — The Beauty Myth (1991, foundational feminist critique)https://www.harpercollins.com/products/the-beauty-myth-naomi-wolf On Humor, Resistance & Power Rebecca Krefting — All Joking Aside: American Humor and Its Discontents (2014)https://jhu.edu/books/title/all-joking-aside/ Lindy West — Shrill: Notes from a Loud Woman (2016)https://www.hachettebookgroup.com/titles/lindy-west/shrill/9780316348452/

    1 h y 40 min
  3. CPTSD, Depression & Addiction

    02/09/2025

    CPTSD, Depression & Addiction

    CPTSD, Depression & Addiction – Three Stories of the Same Nervous System In theory, these are three different diagnoses — separate boxes on separate forms. But in practice, they are often three faces of the same nervous system story. In this episode of Strange Life, I trace the outlines of each condition and lay them side by side — until their overlapping shapes reveal something truer, and maybe more useful, than any one explanation in isolation. We begin with CPTSD, where “C” stands not for childhood but for complex. It describes the systemic damage caused when a nervous system grows under conditions of chronic fear plus helplessness — whether in an abusive household, a prison camp, or any place you can neither fight nor flee. What happens when adrenaline, meant for emergency survival, becomes the everyday fuel of your growth? Neural pathways carve jagged instead of smooth; commas turn into exclamation marks. The result is a brain and body tuned to intensity, one that looks a lot like ADHD from the outside — but whose texture is terror, not thrill. When the system runs that hot for that long, sometimes it collapses. That collapse is what we call depression: the lights dim after years of overdrive, colour drains from the world, and even grief dulls to a numb grey. The Russian word toska captures it well — an abject boredom with life, where nothing tastes, smells, or feels like anything. From inside, the logic of continuing can become almost impossible to grasp. Enter addiction. If something — a drug, a ritual, a chemical, even work or exercise — jolts the nervous system back into Technicolor or cools it enough to breathe, of course you reach for it. And keep reaching. From the inside, relief feels the same whether it comes in a blister pack or a baggie, from espresso or from MDMA. The boundary between “treatment,” “indulgence,” and “sin” is drawn not by neurochemistry but by society. And so the three knot together: CPTSD as a body wired on adrenaline, depression as its eventual collapse, and addiction as its desperate workaround. This is my lived story too — one of hyper-arousal, recurrent collapse, and the chemical interventions (in my case, THC) that keep sensation and aliveness within reach. To untangle them, to see their outlines clearly, is to glimpse not just pathology but the strange, fragile logic of survival. Further Reading & References Herman, J. (1992). Trauma and Recovery – foundational text introducing Complex PTSD. Van der Kolk, B. (2014). The Body Keeps the Score – on how trauma shapes nervous systems. National Center for PTSD: What is Complex PTSD? WHO ICD-11: Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder American Psychiatric Association: Depression Medical News Today: What is Toska? NIDA: Understanding Drug Use and Addiction Carhart-Harris, R. et al. (2021). Trial of Psilocybin vs SSRIs for Depression

    13 min
  4. 21st Century Womanhood

    19/08/2025

    21st Century Womanhood

    What does it mean to be a woman in the 21st century? From mascara to myths to ice ages, Daisy Onubogu unpacks the origins and contradictions of modern womanhood. --- Episode 4: 21st Century Womanhood What does it really mean to beEpisode 4: 21st Century Womanhood What does it really mean to be a woman in the 21st century? Between chasing the ever-shifting rules of femininity and questioning the very foundations of “womanhood” as a category, the modern experience of gender can feel like running two marathons at once — one for survival, one for understanding. In this expansive episode of Strange Life, Daisy Onubogu maps both sides of that struggle. She traces the architecture of gender back not just to patriarchy or politics, but to ancient climatic shifts — like the Younger Dryas, the sudden freeze that upended ecosystems 12,000 years ago and shaped the societies that followed. From there, she asks: how did those environmental shocks crystallise into cultural ones? And how did “womanhood” become a role to be policed and performed? Along the way, she takes us through themes of: Performance & approval: why so much of femininity is judged by external reward structures. Biology vs. culture: exploring the ongoing debate over what is “natural” in gender, and what is constructed. Myth & narrative: how stories we inherit (from Eve to Barbie) continue to script modern womanhood. Resistance & reimagining: what it looks like to reject or reinvent the scripts altogether. It’s a sharp, sometimes irreverent exploration — one that insists on taking gender seriously, but not solemnly. ✨ Further Reading & References ✨ Curious to dig deeper into the ideas behind this episode? Here are some of the texts, thinkers, and resources that shaped it: 🌍 Climate, History & the Roots of Society Younger Dryas — Britannica: https://www.britannica.com/science/Younger-Dryas-climate-interval Hank Green explains AMOC (Gulf Stream): https://youtu.be/pThcIgJyNME?si=xOuugYcR0TgcWJgL NASA Earth Observatory: https://www.earthobservatory.nasa.gov/features/GlobalWarming/page3.php Guns, Germs, and Steel — Jared Diamond: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Guns%2C_Germs%2C_and_Steel The Dawn of Everything — Graeber & Wengrow: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Dawn_of_Everything 👩🏽‍🦱 Gender as Category & Performance Gender Trouble — Judith Butler: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gender_Trouble The Second Sex — Simone de Beauvoir: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Second_Sex Masculinities — Raewyn Connell: https://www.raewynconnell.net/p/masculinities_20.html 💄 Womanhood, Beauty & Social Approval The Beauty Myth — Naomi Wolf: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Beauty_Myth Femininity and Domination — Sandra Lee Bartky: https://archive.org/details/femininitydomina00bart The Second Shift — Arlie Hochschild: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Second_Shift 📖 Myth, Culture & Narrative “Barbie’s Body Politics”: https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1111/j.0022-3840.1998.00209.x “She’s everything” (Barbie Movie): https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/14680777.2024.2381254 Eve (Genesis) — JWA: https://jwa.org/encyclopedia/article/eve-bible 🔮 Reimagining Gender & Futures Feminism Is for Everybody — bell hooks: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bell_hooks Glitch Feminism — Legacy Russell: https://www.versobooks.com/products/460-glitch-feminism Testo Junkie — Paul B. Preciado: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paul_B._Preciado

    12 min
  5. ADHD

    05/08/2025

    ADHD

    🎧 Episode 3: ADHD – The Problem or the Spark? Strange Life Podcast What happens when your brain doesn’t follow the standard IF-THEN rules that society is built on? When the reflexes you learned in early childhood aren’t the “normal” ones… and the world notices? In this expansive and electric episode of Strange Life, host Daisy Onubogu unpacks the true shape of ADHD—not as a list of symptoms, but as a unique way of experiencing the world that can either make you society’s darling or its scapegoat. From time-blindness and nonlinear thinking to the euphoric joy of pattern-matching, Daisy offers a compelling reframe of ADHD not as dysfunction, but as difference—one whose value depends almost entirely on social context and privilege. This is for anyone who has ever wondered: Why am I always late even though I care? Why do I take in so much of the world? Why do I see connections no one else does? Let’s talk about it. 🧠 Topics Covered: How reflexes are formed in early childhood—and how ADHD rewrites them What happens when you don't respond to stimuli the “normal” way ADHD + privilege = genius. ADHD + marginalization = “problem” How society reacts differently to the same traits based on context Time-blindness, novelty-seeking, and dopamine-chasing as encoded survival Pattern-matching as a compulsion, defense mechanism, and creative gift The ADHD–autism overlap (AuDHD) and how they can beautifully balance Understanding brain chemistry as motion, not just imbalance Why medicating isn’t selling out—but conformity shouldn’t be the goal 💬 Quotable Moments: “When you’re ADHD without the privilege that makes you lovable, you become punishable.” “Time-blindness isn’t laziness—it’s just that my brain is responding to X74 instead of X.” “ADHD people fall in love with linking things because those connections used to save us.” “You’re not wrong. You’re just different. And different isn’t broken.” 🔎 SEO Keywords: ADHD podcast, neurodivergent podcast, ADHD symptoms, ADHD pattern-matching, ADHD time blindness, ADHD vs autism, AuDHD experience, executive dysfunction, dopamine ADHD, ADHD brain chemistry, ADHD reframing, Strange Life Podcast 🧩 Referenced Concepts & Frames: IF-THEN reflex development in early childhood Pattern-matching as both trauma response and gift Time-blindness and alternative cognitive processing ADHD as context-sensitive (star vs problem) ADHD & brain chemistry explained through physics analogies AuDHD dynamics and overlap: routines, novelty, masking, burnout A reframing of dopamine, serotonin, adrenaline as motion states, not static chemicals 📬 Stay Connected Follow Daisy / the podcast and get updates: Instagram: [@daisyverao] / https://instagram.com/daisyverao TikTok: [@daisyverao] Substack: [⁠strangelifepod⁠] / https://strangelifepod.substack.com/ Website: [⁠https://msha.ke/daisyveraonubogu/#about]

    20 min
  6. Igbo Heritage

    22/07/2025

    Igbo Heritage

    🎙️ Episode 2: Igbo Heritage - Strange Life Podcast What does it mean to inherit a culture you were once ashamed of, barely knew, and now deeply love?In this second episode of Strange Life, Daisy takes us on an intimate, lyrical exploration of Igbo identity—unpacking the stereotypes, cosmology, and colonial trauma that shape one of West Africa’s most dynamic cultures. It’s part memoir, part cultural commentary, and part love letter to a heritage that, for years, felt like a ghost in the room.From the oral storytelling traditions that shaped Igbo brilliance, to the devastating legacy of colonization, civil war, and diaspora identity fragmentation—this episode is a journey of return, reclamation, and reverence.🌍 Topics Covered:- The 4 core Igbo stereotypes: talkative, emotional, mercantile, and dancer- How oral tradition shaped Igbo language, memory, and social structure- The impact of British colonization, the Biafran War, and the seizure of Igbo assets- Igbo cosmology and the universe as a divine marketplace- The concept of Chi (personal destiny) and communal convergence- Apprenticeship culture (Igba Boi) and intergenerational wealth building- Dancing, rhythm, and physical sensitivity as cultural embodiment- Growing up disconnected from heritage, and finding your way back- Being Igbo, Irish, neurodivergent, and nonconforming—and embracing the mosaic💬 Quotable Moments:“Even the cosmology of the Igbo people is founded on the metaphor of a marketplace.”“I’m a woman so dyspraxic I walk into doors daily—but add music, and I move like water.”“It took years of navel-gazing to reclaim my Igboness and say ‘my people’ without flinching.”“I love me as I am—in my full culture-mongrel strangeness and beauty.”🔎 Tags:#igbo #culture #podcast, #nigerian #nigerianyouth #nigeria #identity, #biafra #history, #Chi #Igbocosmology, #Igbomarketplace, #Igbodiaspora, #African #heritage, #westafrican #postcolonialism #igboamaka #apprenticeship, #stereotypes, #StrangeLifePodcast📚 Referenced Concepts & Cultural Anchors:1) Chi (personal spirit/destiny)Overview of Chi in Igbo cosmology and how it relates to personal destiny:→ https://sloaneangelou.blog/journal/what-is-chi-in-igbo-cosmology→ https://igbocalendar.com2) Igbo Four Market Days (Eke, Orie, Afọ, Nkwọ)Traditional 4-day Igbo calendar tied to spiritual, agricultural, and communal cycles:→ https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Igbo_calendar3) Igba-Boi (Igbo Apprenticeship System)Multi-generational wealth-building tradition central to Igbo commerce and mentorship:→ https://www.oriire.com/article/igba-boi-igbos-source-of-trans-generational-wealth→ https://school.tekedia.com/product/igbaboi4) Odinani (Igbo Cosmology and Spiritual Science)Indigenous spiritual worldview and system of knowledge:→ https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Odinala5) The Biafran War (1967–1970)Civil war and post-colonial trauma central to modern Igbo identity:→ https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nigerian_Civil_War→ https://www.postcolonialweb.org/nigeria/biafra.html📬 Stay ConnectedFollow Daisy / the podcast and get updates:Instagram: [@daisyverao] / https://instagram.com/daisyveraoTikTok: [@daisyverao] / https://tiktok.com/@daisyveraoSubstack: [⁠strangelifepod⁠] / https://strangelifepod.substack.com/Website: [⁠https://www.strangelifepod.com/] 💌 Support the PodcastIf this episode moved you, please:Share it with your peopleFollow and rate it hereSubscribe to the newsletterSay hi on socials!

    14 min
  7. The Autistic Mind

    08/07/2025

    The Autistic Mind

    Episode 1: The Autistic Mind 🎧 Introduction What is autism really like from the inside? In this powerful debut episode, Daisy dives deep into the lived experience of the autistic human—unfiltered and unapologetically rich with insight, nuance, and dry-dark humor. From why autistic people are missing the invisible "vibe map" that most people are born with, to how we build replacement systems of logic, observation, and raw processing power—this is a journey into neurodivergence that moves beyond stereotypes and into the heart of autistic cognition. Whether you're autistic, love someone who is, or just want to understand what it feels like to exist in a world that wasn't built for your brain, I'm almost certain this episode will challenge, enlighten, resonate... all that good stuff. 🧠 Topics Covered: The "sense of resonance"—what neurotypicals take for granted, and autistics must construct from scratch Why autistic life often feels like playing 4D chess every waking moment The two major autistic archetypes I know: the "Hiders" and the "System Builders" Why learning becomes a stim, a survival strategy, and a source of euphoric relief The toll of continuous over-processing: health, burnout, and sensory overwhelm Bullying, misunderstanding, and the consequences of violating social expectations The joy of show-and-tell, and the beauty of shared understanding Why, despite it all, the autistic mind is something to be deeply proud of 💬 Quotable Moments: “Autistics land in this Rubik’s cube of a flesh container and have to author a stop-motion life animation with zero context.” “All autistic hobbies are just learning in different guises. Fight me outside about it.” “We love show-and-tell because it’s an antidote to the loneliness of living in your own universe.” 🔎 Tags:#Autism, #autisticmind, #neurodivergence, #neurodivergentpodcast, #autisticexperience, #identitypodcast, #StrangeLifePodcast, #autistictraits, #AuDHD, #ADHD, #resonance, #autisticburnout, #autisticmasking, #sensoryoverwhelm, #socialconfusion, #autisticwomen, #blackautisticvoices, #autismawareness, #autismfromtheinside, #lived experience autism 📚 Referenced or Related Concepts: Resonance (the felt intuitive knowing of things many neurotypicals rely on for social navigation) Fascia and bioelectric feedback in sensory processing Glutamate and cortisol in autistic cognition and burnout Uncanny valley responses to social divergence Also this episode intersects with current research on autism and neurodivergence. For further reading: Monotropism: An Interest-Based Account of Autism The Double Empathy Problem – Damian Milton Sensory Processing in Autism – NIH Study 📬 Stay Connected Follow Daisy / the podcast and get updates: Instagram: [@daisyverao] TikTok: [@daisyverao] YouTube: [Strange Life Podcast] Substack: [strangelifepod] Website: [daisyveraonubogu] 🎙️ Subscribe, rate, and review if this episode moved you—it helps more people discover Strange Life.

    21 min

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Strange Life is a podcast about the hidden architectures shaping our minds, cultures, and identities. Hosted by hyperverbal autistic thinker and writer: Daisy Onubogu, each episode explores a different way of being human — from the wiring of neurodivergent brains, to the inheritance of Igbo culture, the scars of depression, the contradictions of 21st century womanhood and more. With sharp insight, Nigerian humour, and unapologetic autistic honesty, Strange Life looks at why society works the way it does, how history brought us here, and what other ways of living might be. Fortnightly updates!