Learning in Real Time

Melisa
  • 5.0 (1)
  • Self-Improvement
  • Updated Weekly

What does it mean to keep learning when you never finished school? Melisa wanted to study psychology and start this podcast years ago, however, life got in the way. So she stopped school and started this podcast anyway. Learning in Real Time is a weekly podcast exploring the mind, human behavior, and everyday life through psychology concepts, personal experience, and honest curiosity. Some episodes dig into neuroscience, and others are just honest questions worth asking. There's no degree required and no expertise claimed!

Episodes

  1. May 1

    Why You Can't Think Your Way Out of It: The Window of Tolerance and Nervous System Dysregulation

    For a long time, I thought something was wrong with me. After we moved from Idaho... new state, new baby, new everything... I slowly stopped showing up the way I wanted to for my kids. The spark was gone. The anger came. And no matter how many therapists I saw or how hard I tried to just think differently, nothing changed. In this episode, I'm sharing what I finally found that actually made sense of all of it: the window of tolerance, nervous system dysregulation, and why you genuinely cannot think your way out of a physiological state. If you've ever felt like a hollow version of yourself and couldn't figure out why, this one is for you.

    24 min

  2. Apr 25

    Why Do Dreams Feel So Real? The Neuroscience of Dreaming (and Nightmares)

    Ever since I was a kid, I've kept a dream journal. My dreams aren't just normal, everyday situations, they are entirely different worlds, complete with plotlines, characters, and days that feel like weeks. But when I talk to my husband, his dreams are just about going to work. Why do we dream so differently? And why do our dreams feel so incredibly real, even when they make absolutely no logical sense?In this episode, we are exploring the science of dreaming. I'm sharing one of my most vivid (and terrifying) dreams, and looking at what actually happens in the brain when we sleep. We talk about the prefrontal cortex, the amygdala, and why your brain's logic center shuts down so your imagination can take over. If you've ever woken up and wanted to go back to the world your mind created, this episode is for you.

    19 min

  3. Apr 17

    You're Not Overreacting. You're Just Tired

    This week, I jumped and screamed at my husband for walking into the kitchen, and then at my son for walking through the door. And then I couldn't make a grocery list, and somehow ended up convinced I was failing as a mom... all before the day was over. Sound familiar? In this episode, we look at what sleep deprivation actually does to your nervous system, why the amygdala gets stuck in threat-detection mode, how exhaustion changes how your brain works, and why your thoughts can spiral so fast into the worst version of everything. The feelings are real. The conclusions your brain makes? That's where it gets interesting. Quick note: Yes, I said teenagers have a bigger amygdala than their prefrontal cortex. Technically, it's more about development and connectivity than size — but the point stands!

    17 min

  4. Apr 3

    Overcoming Decision Fatigue: When everything matters

    This week I found myself feeling stuck in a way I couldn’t really explain. Not because I don’t understand what I want, and not because I don’t know what to do, but because understanding something doesn’t always mean you move forward with it.There are times when multiple things matter at the same time. Where different goals, responsibilities, or expectations start pulling in different directions, and instead of moving forward, you just feel stuck in the middle of it. It made me start wondering: why does that happen? Why can you understand something clearly and still feel like you’re not moving?In this episode, I'm talking about "goal interference," the mental load of holding too many unfinished projects, and the psychology of decision fatigue and overwhelm.This isn’t about having a solution. It’s about trying to understand why progress doesn’t always feel like progress even when you’re doing everything you can.

    29 min

  5. Mar 27

    Does Life Actually Have Bad Timing? Expectations vs. Reality

    This week started with a conversation about timing. My husband was talking about how often things in life have felt just slightly off: school, work, opportunities, even housing. Like things didn’t line up the way they were supposed to.And it made me start wondering: is timing actually off… or does it just feel that way?In this episode, I think through why that feeling shows up. How we start building a story around our experiences. How expectations of when things should happen can shape how we see where we are. And how looking back can make everything feel more obvious than it actually was at the time. We're looking at the psychology of timing, how to handle disappointment, and what human behavior tells us about trusting the process when life feels out of sync.This isn’t about having a clear answer. It’s about trying to understand what we call “bad timing”… and whether it’s something real, or something we’re making sense of after the fact.Because maybe it’s not just about timing, maybe it’s about how we understand the story of our life when things don’t go the way we expected.

    33 min

  6. Mar 20

    Cognitive Dissonance: When Your Mind Disagrees with Itself

    There are moments where what you think, what you feel, and what you want don’t line up. It can feel like your mind is working against you. In this episode, I’m exploring that tension and trying to understand what’s actually happening beneath it.I talk through the idea of cognitive dissonance, where it’s not just as conflicting thoughts, but as the experience of holding different beliefs, desires, and identities at the same time. I also explore parts theory and the idea that some of those beliefs come from internalized voices we’ve learned over time, and the neuroscience of why our brains sometimes feel like they are pulling us in opposite directions.This is about recognizing it, seeing the different pieces more clearly, and beginning to understand yourself in a way that might feel less confusing and a little more honest.

    18 min
  7. Why Conflict is so Complicated: Perception and Relationships

    Mar 13

    Why Conflict is so Complicated: Perception and Relationships

    This week I've been thinking about conflict. It started with a situation between my husband and me that made me notice something interesting. It wasn't the situation itself that was causing the conflict; it was how differently we experienced the same event.One situation happened, but my experience of it was one thing, and his experience was something completely different. It made me realize that conflict often comes from the gap between two internal experiences of the same moment. In this episode, we explore human behavior, relationship dynamics, and the psychology behind why two people can see the exact same situation in completely different ways.

    14 min
  8. Is It Failure, or Just New Information? Rethinking Outcomes

    Mar 7

    Is It Failure, or Just New Information? Rethinking Outcomes

    This week I've been thinking about failure. On the last episode, I talked about starting before you feel ready and taking the first step. But recently, I had something I started that didn't work out the way I expected. And it made me start wondering: does that mean I failed? Join me as we unpack the psychology of failure, how the mind works when things go wrong, and how to reframe setbacks in your everyday life.

    15 min
  9. How to Take the First Step When You Feel Intimidated

    Feb 28

    How to Take the First Step When You Feel Intimidated

    This week, I'm talking about something I underestimated: how hard it actually is to take the first step. I share what it looks like to try something completely new, what felt intimidating about starting, and what shifted once I stopped waiting to feel ready. This episode is about beginning before confidence shows up, and why starting might be the real hurdle, not the work itself. If you struggle with perfectionism or imposter syndrome, this conversation about personal development and mindset is for you.

    21 min
  10. Starting Before You Feel Ready: Overcoming Perfectionism

    Feb 21

    Starting Before You Feel Ready: Overcoming Perfectionism

    In this first episode, I'm sharing why I'm starting this podcast now, even before I feel fully ready. I'm also sharing what "learning in real time" actually means in my life, what I'm reading and learning right now, and what consistency means. If you've ever felt behind, unfinished, not ready, or unsure, come with me! We'll explore personal growth, self-improvement, and how to change your mindset when you feel stuck.

    18 min
  • 10 Episodes

About

What does it mean to keep learning when you never finished school? Melisa wanted to study psychology and start this podcast years ago, however, life got in the way. So she stopped school and started this podcast anyway. Learning in Real Time is a weekly podcast exploring the mind, human behavior, and everyday life through psychology concepts, personal experience, and honest curiosity. Some episodes dig into neuroscience, and others are just honest questions worth asking. There's no degree required and no expertise claimed!

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