The opinions and perspectives shared in this episode are those of Dr. Clay Brigance and Marjorie Brigance and are intended for educational and informational purposes only as part of the Love & Infertility podcast. The content discussed is not a substitute for professional medical, mental health, or therapeutic advice, diagnosis, or treatment. If you need assistance navigating infertility, reproductive trauma, or mental health concerns, please consult your healthcare professional or a licensed therapist in your area. This episode contains topics that may be upsetting to some listeners including infertility and reproductive trauma, male-factor infertility diagnosis, IUI and IVF treatment, miscarriage and pregnancy loss, sub-chorionic hematoma, preterm labor, postpartum depression and anxiety, emergency hysterectomy, and mental health challenges. Welcome to Love & Infertility — the podcast specifically created for couples navigating the emotional rollercoaster of infertility, IVF, IUI, miscarriage, and reproductive trauma together. Today’s episode is a very special one: host and therapist Dr. Clay Brigance turns the mic around as he and his wife Marjorie share the story that sparked this podcast. When Clay and Marjorie started trying to have children in 2017, they assumed, like most couples, that it would happen quickly. What followed was years they never planned for, including a male-factor infertility diagnosis, multiple rounds of IUI, one egg retrieval and four embryos, a Christmas Day pregnancy, a sub-chorionic hematoma, a preterm labor, and ultimately, a life-threatening postpartum hemorrhage that ended in an emergency hysterectomy at 35 — with two frozen embryos still waiting. Through it all, Clay and Marjorie navigated shame, isolation, grief, and the complicated work of staying connected when it felt impossible. Their story is raw, honest, and full of hard-won hope — and it is the reason Love & Infertility exists. WHAT YOU'LL LEARN: (02:08) Marjorie was poked and prodded first and before the male-factor infertility diagnosis that changed everything (05:07) Clay on the shame and masculinity crisis that came with the diagnosis (13:34) Sub-chorionic hematoma: what it is, why it's common in IVF, and what it feels like to bleed every day of your first trimester (16:36) How Clay minimized Marjorie's anxiety trying to rescue her and how that made her feel more alone (19:45) Baby Jonah arrives and why the trauma doesn't stop once the baby is here (22:20) One week postpartum: hemorrhaging, five hours in a packed ER waiting room, placenta accreta, and an emergency hysterectomy (27:01) Processing the hysterectomy: grief, postpartum depression, identity loss, and the feeling that womanhood was taken away (30:33) How infertility led Clay to leave school psychology and pursue a PhD in counseling (34:14) From fixing to listening: the shift that changed their marriage (40:19) The one thing Clay wants every couple to hear: infertility doesn't have to destroy your marriage RESOURCES MENTIONED: Couple Therapy for Reproductive Grief by Dr. Clay Brigance, coming Fall 2026Gottman Method Couples Therapy Infertility and Mental Health Manual LET'S CONNECT: Dr. Clay Brigance Instagram: @dr_claybrigance Website: www.drclaybrigance.com Ginny Lupka Instagram: @ginnylupkacounseling Substack: "That's Our Time" Website: www.ginnylupkacounseling.com
