Low Demand Parenting

Amanda Diekman
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Low Demand Parenting

The Low Demand Parenting Podcast is your space to let go of the pressure and embrace a more joyful, authentic approach to parenting. Hosted by Amanda Diekman—author, autistic adult, and mom of three—this podcast isn’t about perfection or expert advice. It’s about learning together how to drop the demands that weigh us down and find the ease we crave in our families. Whether you’re navigating neurodivergence, challenging behaviors, or simply the highs and lows of life, this show offers honest conversations, practical insights, and a whole lot of compassion. Let's thrive, even when it feels like life is on level 12 hard.

الحلقات

  1. The Myth of Permissive Parenting

    قبل ٥ أيام

    The Myth of Permissive Parenting

    Permissive parenting has been labeled the boogeyman of modern parenting—but is it time to rethink what "permissive" really means? In this episode, I unpack the history of parenting styles, challenge the fear and judgment around permissiveness, and explore why flexibility, collaboration, and permission might just be the tools we desperately need to raise thriving, neurodivergent kids. Join me as we dig into neuroscience, attachment theory, and real-life parenting moments to rewrite the rulebook for a new generation of families.   00:35 The Permissive Parent Myth 02:27 Historical Context of Parenting Styles 06:04 Reevaluating Permissive Parenting 09:27 Modern Research and Neuroscience 13:51 Practical Examples and Strategies 21:45 The Need for Permission in Parenting   Read my article in the journal (Di)verge entitled, “Rethinking Permissive Parenting”   Additional Resources:   Low Demand Parenting book: a love letter to exhausted, overwhelmed parents everywhere. Get the first chapter free!  Why is everything with my kid so hard?: Take the quiz to find your first step forward! Low Demand Parenting Blog: a treasure trove of low demand wisdom   Follow us on social for updates on the podcast, blog, and more!  Instagram Facebook Pinterest   The Low Demand Parenting Podcast is your space to let go of the pressure and embrace a more joyful, authentic approach to parenting. We hope you enjoyed this episode and would be honored if you left us a review which helps us reach more parents just like you!    Transcript:    Welcome to the low demand parenting podcast, where we drop the pressure, find the joy and thrive. Even when it feels like life is stuck on level 12 hard. I'm  Amanda Diekmann, author, autistic adult, and mom of three. I'm not here as an expert, but a fellow traveler.  Together, we're learning how to live more gently, authentically, and vibrantly in this wild parenting life.   If there's one boogeyman that modern parents have been thoroughly indoctrinated against it's the permissive parent.   I'll give some examples: So. You're working with a new therapist because your kid is really struggling .  After the second appointment where they've mostly been watching and getting to know you and your child. It's time for them to give you their assessment of what's going on. And they give you a long, what they hope is a compassionate look, and say, "I know this might be hard to hear. But I think that your child needs more boundaries. They're walking all over you. It's obviously killing you. It's time for you to start putting some consequences into place. Because you don't want to be permissive."  And if you're like me, your stomach sinks. Because you know that this person doesn't get it.  Also they've just played on your worst fear, which is that secretly, you're the cause of all this. If you were just a better parent, if you were just stronger, and more consistent, more persistent, more diligent, more boundaried.  If you had better control over your emotions, if you were more calm, if you were just better, you wouldn't be in this particular situation.  That is the secret underbelly of the permissive myth. And I'm going to call it a permissive myth because I actually believe we have all been fed a pack of lies about permissiveness, and it is really hampering our ability to be great parents as a culture, as a, as a parenting community. That we desperately need to get some of our tools back that have been labeled and  shamed as being permissive. And that we need a new way forward that doesn't play by the rule book. Of authoritarian, authoritative, permissive.  But first, I need to explain what we're even talking about here so we can all get on the same page because there's some important history. behind that conversation and the therapist office.    In the  1960s, a researcher named Diana Baumrind, did some research on parenting styles.  She was really curious about three

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  2. Mailbag: How do I get my own needs met?

    ٩ جمادى الأولى

    Mailbag: How do I get my own needs met?

    In this mailbag episode, I answer listener questions about one of the things I get asked most: How to balance adult needs with low demand parenting. We dive into what to do when your family isn’t on board with low demand and how to meet your own core needs when your kid can’t leave the house for months. From finding support as a low demand parent to managing a PDA child’s need for closeness, we’ll explore how to identify our true needs and disentangle them from specific expectations. Tune in for real-life strategies, deep insights, and a reminder that we can meet our needs while respecting the capacity of our loved ones.   Time Stamps:   00:53 Understanding Adult Needs and Low Demand Parenting 02:53 Navigating Family Dynamics and Expectations 07:07 Personal Journey and Real-Life Examples 11:44 Addressing Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA) Additional Resources: Low Demand Parenting book: a love letter to exhausted, overwhelmed parents everywhere. Get the first chapter free!  Why is everything with my kid so hard?: Take the quiz to find your first step forward! Low Demand Parenting Blog: a treasure trove of low demand wisdom   Follow us on social for updates on the podcast, blog, and more!  Instagram Facebook Pinterest   The Low Demand Parenting Podcast is your space to let go of the pressure and embrace a more joyful, authentic approach to parenting. We hope you enjoyed this episode and would be honored if you left us a review which helps us reach more parents just like you!    Transcript:   Welcome to the Low Demand Parenting Podcast, where we drop the pressure, find the joy, and thrive, even when it feels like life is stuck on level 12 hard. I'm Amanda Diekmann, author, autistic adult, and mom of three. I'm not here as an expert, but a fellow traveler. Together, we're learning how to live more gently, authentically, and vibrantly in this wild parenting life. Today, we have a mailbag episode where I answer your questions about things that are concerning you, things that you're facing as a low demand family. And both of the questions for today address the way that our adult needs intersect with the demands that we make of other people. Our work to do as the low demand parent in this scenario is figuring out what we really need. And once we know our needs, We can disentangle those needs from all of the various solutions that are coming to our minds immediately of ways to get those needs met. Typically, as parents, our first way to solve getting our needs met is to get our kids to change. Like, well, if I could just get my kid to go to bed earlier, then I could get more sleep at night. Or if I want to go to the gym, I've got to get my kid to go to the childcare. Part of our process here is recognizing the core need, exercise. Sleep, and then separating ourselves emotionally and practically from the solutions that we've latched on to as the key way to get those needs met, especially if those solutions are proving too hard for our kids or, as we'll talk about in this episode, other adults in our network. Once we're clear about our needs, We can let go of the demands and find ways that we can be okay and get our core needs met at the same time as we embrace other people's real live challenges, the places where they simply can't do what we're asking them to do. This is the core of Low Demand. Not that you let go of what matters to you. Not that you sacrifice yourself while everyone else gets their needs met. It's not even an either or between you or your kid. We're stretching into the challenging, murky, and beautiful territory of the both and. What if we have a family dynamic where we can both get our core needs met as long as we can hold loosely to the way it happens? When we bring our curiosity and our creativity to our basic needs, there is always a way forward. Our first question comes from a listener who is wondering a very simple, but actually quite profound question. How do I

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  3. Parenting With the Nervous System In Mind

    ٢ جمادى الأولى

    Parenting With the Nervous System In Mind

    In this episode, Amanda speaks with Dr. Megan Anna Neff, psychologist and co-host of the Neurodivergent Conversations podcast, to discuss how understanding the nervous system changes everything about parenting. They explore how stress responses affect both parents and children, the power of co-regulation, and why meltdowns are more than just big emotions. Dr. Neff shares insights on the autonomic nervous system, practical strategies for supporting neurodivergent kids, and the science of repair after ruptures. Tune in for a conversation on finding compassion and resilience, even in the most challenging parenting moments.   12 Days of Low Demand Holidays:  I'll say it: Holidays can be the absolute worst. This transformative course is tailored for families navigating the unique challenges of the holiday season. Discover impactful video lessons, a comprehensive workbook, and recording of an interactive Q&A to empower you through the festivities. See all the details here!   Links: Meet Dr. Megan Anna Neff Explore Neurodivergent Insights page Check out Megan Anna's wonderful book "Self-Care for Autistic People" Listen to Divergent Conversations podcast with Dr. Neff and Patrick Casale   Time Stamps: 00:34 Meet Megan Anna Neff 02:18 Understanding the Nervous System 04:29 Sympathetic and Parasympathetic Systems 06:50 Nervous System Responses to Stress 09:17 Interacting Nervous Systems in Parenting 10:31 The Science of Interpersonal Neurobiology 11:19 Understanding Mirror Neurons 12:42 The Pressure of Staying Regulated 14:58 The Importance of Repair in Parenting 15:43 Modeling Self-Regulation for Children 17:49 Honesty and Trust in Parenting     Additional Resources: As we move into the end of 2024, you're going to LOVE the Low Demand Holidays course -- your step-by-step holiday survival guide. With your high-needs kids, with burnout hovering, and too much on your plate -- Is celebration and joy even possible? It absolutely can be when you drop demands and focus on what truly matters. Low Demand Parenting book: a love letter to exhausted, overwhelmed parents everywhere. Get the first chapter free!  Why is everything with my kid so hard?: Take the quiz to find your first step forward! Low Demand Parenting Blog: a treasure trove of low demand wisdom   Follow us on social for updates on the podcast, blog, and more!  Instagram Facebook Pinterest   Transcript: Welcome to the Low Demand Parenting Podcast, where we drop the pressure, find the joy, and thrive, even when it feels like life is stuck on level 12 hard. I'm Amanda Diekmann, author, autistic adult, and mom of three. I'm not here as an expert, but a fellow traveler. Together, we're learning how to live more gently, authentically, and vibrantly in this wild parenting life. In our episode today, I am talking with my friend Megan Anna Neff. Megan Anna is a psychologist, an autistic and ADHD adult, co host of the Neurodivergent Conversations podcast and author of Self Care for Autistic People. This conversation about the nervous system is so important to me as a parent and a parenting coach because I think it's essential information. People come to me all the time asking, are we doing this right? Is my kid doing okay? Here's what's going on in our lives. Are they developmentally on track? We have so many questions and we're always looking around and comparing our kids to other kids, our kids to the normal, our kids to what it says in the book, because we want to answer one fundamental question, which is, are they okay? And the complicated answer is, yes. The only measurement we've been given is in our own bodies. We've been given an internal barometer. It's the nervous system. The only way to know really whether or not something is a reasonable expectation or something you need to drop, whether it's aligned and it feels good or whether it's totally not the right approach, is inside of your body and inside of your child. Learni

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  4. How Low Demand Parenting Will Change Your Life

    ٢٥ ربيع الآخر

    How Low Demand Parenting Will Change Your Life

    What it's about: In this episode of The Low Demand Parenting Podcast, I’m diving into what low demand parenting really looks like. As an autistic adult, mom of three, and someone who’s been on this journey myself, I’ve seen firsthand how letting go of traditional parenting pressures opens the door to more trust, connection, and joy in our families. Inspired by Ross Green’s Collaborative and Proactive Solutions, I share how releasing control and truly respecting our kids’ boundaries can change everything. We’ll talk about how meltdowns are a form of communication, how to build genuine trust, and the growth that comes when we parent from a place of understanding and reflection. It’s all about moving away from power struggles and toward a more peaceful, respectful home life.   12 Days of Low Demand Holidays:  I'll say it: Holidays can be the absolute worst. This transformative course is tailored for families navigating the unique challenges of the holiday season. Discover impactful video lessons, a comprehensive workbook, and recording of an interactive Q&A to empower you through the festivities. See all the details here!   Links: Ross Greene's The Explosive Child Collaborative and Proactive Solutions approach   00:00 Introduction to Low Demand Parenting 00:59 Early Parenting Struggles 02:20 Discovering Ross Green's Approach 03:30 Building Trust and Letting Go 03:59 Core Principles of Low Demand Parenting 08:46 Proactive and Reflective Practices 10:46 The Path to Freedom and Joy 12:51 Personal Transformation and Final Thoughts 15:12 Conclusion and Call to Action   Ready to Start Dropping Demands? If you’re ready to dive deeper into low demand parenting, I’ve got some great FREE resources to help you get started! Quiz: Why is Everything So Hard? – This quick, insightful quiz will help you understand why parenting might feel so overwhelming right now and give you personalized steps to lighten the load. Take the quiz here. Free Chapter: Low Demand Parenting – Curious about my book, Low Demand Parenting? Download the first chapter for free and start your journey toward more ease and joy. Get the free chapter here.   Transcript: Hello, we are going to talk this week about how low demand parenting is different from other parenting techniques. And after years of practicing low demand, what the most powerful demand drops have actually been. Let's talk about how low demand parenting is different from some of the other techniques and tools and strategies and mindsets that you might've encountered. I want to go back to my early parenting days, when I was eager, so desperate, in fact, for strategies that would help me parent my three kids, who I adore with my whole heart, and who also seemed to struggle. Every day with what I had been taught to see as ordinary aspects of being a human and the strategies that professionals and books and blogs and podcasts recommended were things like timeouts or time ins, punishments or consequences or natural consequences, reward charts, sticker charts, praise, praise, Ignoring. And every one of those techniques that I tried chipped away or outright destroyed the relationship I wanted to have with my kids. Clear kind boundaries and developing emotional vocabulary enraged and alienated them. Picture schedules, consistent routines, and enforced sensory breaks all fell flat. Nothing worked. All of the best techniques that I was taught failed. And at every turn, it was my fault. I felt like such a failure. Discovering Ross Green's work changed my path. Ross Green is the author of many books, including The Explosive Child and The Parenting Approach, called Collaborative and Proactive Solutions. When I discovered what Dr. Green describes as releasing adult controlled plans, or Plan A, and his encouragement for us to embrace true collaboration, it felt like freedom. When I truly gave up on My responsibility as the adult being to control the outcomes and

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  5. What Is Low Demand Parenting All About?

    ١٨ ربيع الآخر

    What Is Low Demand Parenting All About?

    What it's about: In this very first episode of The Low Demand Parenting Podcast, I share the story behind my journey into low demand parenting. It all started when my middle child faced autistic burnout during the pandemic, and I realized that traditional parenting approaches were breaking us down. Through this episode, I explain how letting go of expectations and embracing trust, connection, and safety changed everything for our family. I also give a glimpse into what future episodes will cover, including interviews, mailbag questions, and more real-time reflections on parenting, neurodiversity, and behavior.   00:00 Introduction to the Podcast 01:26 The Beginning of Our Low Demand Journey 02:09 A Turning Point: The Breaking Day 04:09 Understanding Autistic Burnout 05:36 Discovering Low Demand Parenting 07:44 The Origins of Low Demand Parenting 09:52 Developing the Low Demand Method 10:48 The Core Principles of Low Demand Parenting 12:54 Addressing Common Concerns 13:52 The Importance of Safety and Connection 15:37 Conclusion and Future Topics     Ready to Start Dropping Demands? If you’re ready to dive deeper into low demand parenting, I’ve got some great FREE resources to help you get started! Quiz: Why is Everything So Hard? – This quick, insightful quiz will help you understand why parenting might feel so overwhelming right now and give you personalized steps to lighten the load. Take the quiz here. Free Chapter: Low Demand Parenting – Curious about my book, Low Demand Parenting? Download the first chapter for free and start your journey toward more ease and joy. Get the free chapter here.   Transcript: This is a new podcast, and so we are going to be exploring in this episode more about how I came to be talking to you in your earbuds about low demand parenting, about my own journey, and what is low demand. In future podcasts, we're going to have all kinds of great stuff. We're going to have some of my favorite interviews with parents and professors and brilliant thinkers. All around the questions of parenting, behavior, and neurodiversity. There's also going to be some mailbag episodes where you can send me your questions and I will reply directly to you. As well as some of my own thoughts, as they're evolving in real time, about what it means to practice this radical and beautiful parenting style. Our story with Low Demand started five years ago. When my middle kid was five, turning six, we started kindergarten process for him. I'll note in particular that this was during the pandemic, and so everything with school was The option for online kindergarten was terrible. He hated the fact that he couldn't go to the playground, that his experience was so different from his older brothers. He hated the fact that he wasn't making friends and that every single Zoom room was chaotic and overwhelming. We tried school environment, after school environment, and everyone crumbled. And then one day I was desperate, so desperate for this school to work out. And. He was telling me with his body and his energy, no, this is not for me today. And I leaned on the dominant parenting narrative that I had been handed, which is to see this moment as anxiety and to push through. If we avoid something, then anxiety wins and it's only going to get worse. So he needs to face that. this today or else tomorrow is going to be 10 times harder and it's only going to snowball. And so I picked him up and I cooed nice words in his ear like, I love you, I support you, you can do this. And I passed him off into his teacher's hands. She had to fully restrain him in order to keep him inside the school area. And I turned and walked away as he screamed at me to come back. And I share that knowing that many of you have had not just one, but dozens of moments like this, and we have two. It just happens that this was the before and after day for us. This was the day that broke everything. If it didn't break eve

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  6. المقطع الترويجي للموسم ١

    Trailer: Low Demand Parenting - The Podcast

    Welcome to The Low Demand Parenting Podcast, where we drop the pressure, find the joy, and thrive—even when life feels like it’s stuck on level 12 hard. I’m Amanda Diekman, author, autistic adult, and mom of three. But more than anything, I’m a fellow traveler on this wild parenting journey. if you’re ready to parent with more joy, less pressure, and a whole lot of compassion for yourself and your kids, then I’m so glad you’re here. Subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and let’s do this together. We’ll laugh, we’ll learn, and we’ll figure out how to thrive. I'm so glad you're here. Remember: It takes great strength to let things go, Amanda

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The Low Demand Parenting Podcast is your space to let go of the pressure and embrace a more joyful, authentic approach to parenting. Hosted by Amanda Diekman—author, autistic adult, and mom of three—this podcast isn’t about perfection or expert advice. It’s about learning together how to drop the demands that weigh us down and find the ease we crave in our families. Whether you’re navigating neurodivergence, challenging behaviors, or simply the highs and lows of life, this show offers honest conversations, practical insights, and a whole lot of compassion. Let's thrive, even when it feels like life is on level 12 hard.

المعلومات

  • صناع العمل
    Amanda Diekman
  • سنوات النشاط
    ١٤٤٦ هـ
  • الحلقات
    ٦
  • التقييم
    ملائم
  • حقوق النشر
    © 2024 Amanda Diekman
  • موقع البرنامج على الويب
    Low Demand Parenting

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