Monster Crush

Monster Crush

Dating can be hard - especially when your date is the legendary Bigfoot! Where do you take a guy like that? More importantly, where do you find a guy like that? You're in luck because our crypto-woo-ologists have a binder full of suitable candidates ready for one hell of a good time. Whether or not our bait survives is up to them. Who says love isn't without a few risks?

  1. FEB 3

    Date 117 - Facial Your (D&D) Demons Pt. 2

    We hope you didn’t fill up on Demon Princes last time because for this episode we give you another heaping helping. Join us as we round out the last FIVE Demon Princes of Dungeons & Dragons’ Forgotten Realms with the hedonistic Graz’zt, slimy Juiblex, deceptive Fraz-Urb'luu, insufferable Kostchtchie, and alluring Malcanthet! Strap on, strap in, and get ready for another plunge into the Abyss! Featuring: We are here to warm things up on these chilly days, a visit to the Smut Corner: appreciation for 3rd person narratives, amnesiac slayers, space vampires, and a little somnophilia - Spooky News: a new/prehistoric form of life (that looks like a penis), the Leviathan is awake, Dorito UAP spotted over Area 51, and the Seattle Kraken won back the Cryptid Cup - Deep Blue Sea slashfic, breast milk flavors of the Forgotten Realms courtesy of Ed Greenwood, the only sin is moderation, total slime control, the incel of demon princes, the queen of succubi, AND MORE! CW: winter storm/Christian mythology/conspiracy theories (31:00-35:00), lack of autonomy through magic (56:00-57:00), misogynistic fictional character (1:35:00-1:43:30) We are proud to be a part of the Sword & Key Network - beacons.ai/swordandkey. Our music is by the handsome and talented Nick Lambert. Find him on Instagram @lambertropolis. All other music and sounds are licensed through Epidemic Sounds.

    1h 59m

  2. JAN 20

    Date 116 - Facial Your (D&D) Demons Pt. 1

    For all the hype that Stranger Things has given to D&D, people now know what a Demogorgon is… or do they? For this date we get even Strangerer with some of the OG D&D Things, namely D&D Demon Princes so we can tell you what the Demogorgon really is! And this is only part 1! So get ready to plunge into the Abyss with the nightmarish Demogorgon, rotting Orcus, bestial Baphomet, feral Yeenoghu, and fungal Zuggtmoy! Featuring: We are at least aware of Stranger Things - Spooky News: The Cryptid Cup of the NHL, Passing of Erich von Däniken (author of Chariot of the Gods), UK advised to prepare for financial collapse in case of extraterrestrials, UFOs almost launched nuclear weapons in the 80s - vampiric manta rays, two baboon heads who can’t agree, Orcus is (not surprisingly) an edgelord, demonic taint spreading, Yeenoghu may not be your demon but he’s the demon who stepped up, even demons have roommates, horrifying lullabies, AND MORE! CW: real person death (12:30-15:55), ancient alien implied racism (13:45-15:55), nuclear war (18:30-21:00), harm to animals (1:07:00-1:08:00),  - mentions of demonic entities, brief allusions to Christianity, undead, rot, necrosis, fungal horror, and slavery as it appears in fantasy settings appear sporadically throughout We are proud to be a part of the Sword & Key Network - beacons.ai/swordandkey. Our music is by the handsome and talented Nick Lambert. Find him on Instagram @lambertropolis. All other music and sounds are licensed through Epidemic Sounds.

    1h 30m

  3. JAN 8

    Date 115 - A Pascagoula Elephantman Never Forgets

    For the New Year we look back on singletons we met once but never really got a chance at love. So for this date we pull the Pascagoula Elephantmen out of the stables for a little space seduction and alien abduction. Strap in and strap on because these ETs are out of this world. Featuring: we have rhythm (sort of) - New Years Resolutions - “Sliterature” - hot takes on orc romance novels - Spooky News: The International Cryptozoology Museum is moving, San Antonio Dogman Sightings, Bigfoot Bae - carrot-like protrusions - two bros chilling in a rowboat -  when the downstairs is the upstairs - AND MORE! CW: Spiders (4:05-5:30), discussion of fantasy stereotypes/racism (16:00-16:55), death from cancer (57:00-58:00), mentions of abduction/physical restriction related to extraterrestrials throughout We are proud to be a part of the Sword & Key Network - beacons.ai/swordandkey. Our music is by the handsome and talented Nick Lambert. Find him on Instagram @lambertropolis. All other music and sounds are licensed through Epidemic Sounds.

    1h 14m

  4. 12/24/2025

    Date 114 - Naughty or Nice Pt. 2

    Happy Holidays from all of us at Monster Crush! To celebrate this festive season we return to the Yule traditions of ol for a couple monsters that are naughty, nice, and everything in between. So jingle your bells and wrap your present for the Mari Lwyd and Grýla the Christmas Witch. Plus a few bonus monsters including The Yule Cat! Featuring: who would Zooey Deschanel play in The Lion King? - you can’t lowkey Les Mis someone - F**k, Merry, Exorcise the ghosts from A Christmas Carol - The Feast of the Ass - watch out for Sausage Swiper and Window Peeper - capitalist incentives to avoid being eaten by a cat - Stubby the Yule Lad - AND MORE!  CW: Mentions of Christianity and Christian influences on history throughout, mention of the historical use of blackface (24:20-25:10), harm to children in folklore (43:10-1:10:15) We are proud to be a part of the Sword & Key Network - beacons.ai/swordandkey. Our music is by the handsome and talented Nick Lambert. Find him on Instagram @lambertropolis. All other music and sounds are licensed through Epidemic Sounds.

    1h 17m

  5. 12/10/2025

    Date 113 - Naughty or Nice Pt. 1

    For this holiday episode we have only one question for you… Naughty or Nice? Honestly, with monsters it really doesn’t matter which you pick because even the nice ones have a dark side. So wrap your present and stuff your stocking for the naughty Kallikantzaros and the nice Nisse! Featuring: Did we do a Krampus episode? Yes, yes we did - it’s really dark in the PNW - when you can’t count to three - throw pancakes on your roof - they’re just garden gnomes - minor cat-induced chaos - don’t put the butter on the bottom - harmless horse pranks - follow the rules, even when the rules change - a life goal is to be a sauna-spirit - AND MORE! CW: Mentions of Christianity (throughout the episode but starting at 11:30), some serious Christian religious trauma (24:30 - 25:30), harm to infants (25:30 - 26:10), mention of the history of bigotry against Romani (31:30 - 32:14), harm to domesticated animals (54:45 - 55:30), folkloric murder (56:45 - 57:30) We are proud to be a part of the Sword & Key Network - beacons.ai/swordandkey. Our music is by the handsome and talented Nick Lambert. Find him on Instagram @lambertropolis. All other music and sounds are licensed through Epidemic Sounds.

    1h 26m

  6. 11/27/2025

    Date 112 - Tur-Key to My Heart

    For many Americans Thanksgiving is a holiday focused on the iconic main dish, the turkey. But what about the country of Türkiye? Apparently it’s chock full of monsters we can smooch! So for this holiday, we gobble down on two Turkish monsters with the iconic Lake Van Monster and the nightmarish Al Basty. Pass the gravy because this episode is going to get saucy! Featuring: an ode to the noble turkey, why we’ll never talk about Sesame Street Monsters, the alternate timeline of Big Bird tragedy, a visit to LD’s Smut Corner, Spooky News: Age of Disclosure documentary and phantom boobs - a rich cultural heritage of monsters in Türkiye, a cyclo-boobian monster, a lake monster with murder on the mind, nightmares hide where it’s wet and they ride your horse without permission, the monster that is your cool wine aunt, AND MORE! CW: brief discussion of the Challenger explosion (11:30-13:00), conservative politicians/current politics/conservative religious conspiracies (29:00-33:15), monster attack that leads to a reported death (53:00-53:45), nightmares/sleep paralysis (58:45-1:08:00) post-partum depression/miscarriage/birth complications (1:02:46-1:08:00) We are proud to be a part of the Sword & Key Network - beacons.ai/swordandkey. Our music is by the handsome and talented Nick Lambert. Find him on Instagram @lambertropolis. All other music and sounds are licensed through Epidemic Sounds.

    1h 20m

  7. 11/11/2025

    Date 111 - One and Done

    That’s a lot of ones all in one episode number… So let’s do three cryptids that were only seen once! These monsters were seen for a good time but not for a long time and only for one time. So enjoy The 50-Foot Congo Snake, The Bathysphaera intacta (or Giant Dragonfish), and The Giant Shrimp in the Laundry Room (aka Shrimpy). It’s BIG SNAKE, BIG FISH, BIG SHRIMP… Plus a bonus cryptid! Featuring: small talk about the weather quickly devolving into deep dives about dialects and accents, greener pastures for podcast listening, Spooky News: Mass Mall Dreaming, we like big snakes and we cannot lie, going real deep with hefty fish, big things in deep dark ocean, potential basement-dwelling escaped government experiment with a fondness for laundry, AND MORE! CW: dreams and potential mass psychosis (14:15-24:30), snakes (27:00-35:30) We are proud to be a part of the Sword & Key Network. Our music is by the handsome and talented Nick Lambert. Find him on Instagram @lambertropolis. All other music and sounds are licensed through Epidemic Sounds.

    1h 1m

  8. 10/26/2025

    Date 110 - I’ll Make a Man Out of You

    WE’RE BACK! Just in time for halloween we return to our teratophilic ways to explore romance with one of the most iconic monsters - FRANKENSTEIN’S MONSTER!!! So get ready for jokes to leave you in stitches, love that strikes like lightning, and a monster ready for LONG-TERM commitments because… IT’S ALIVE!!! Featuring: Our podcast relationship Unicorn (Shadow), Halloween traditions & memories, LD’s Smut Corner - Scared Sexy Collection, a collection of dudes - a bro-pourri or a dude turducken, 8 feet tall and full of emotions, epistolary novels are just early found footage, Mary Shelley is a freak and a true Gothic Queen, we love cliterature… if you can find it, enormous schwanstuckers, AND MORE! CW: body horror, minor references to gun violence, fictional child death, fictional murder, and references to historical misogyny We are proud to be a part of the Sword & Key Network. Our music is by the handsome and talented Nick Lambert. Find him on Instagram @lambertropolis. All other music and sounds are licensed through Epidemic Sounds.

    1h 34m
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5
out of 5
14 Ratings

About

Dating can be hard - especially when your date is the legendary Bigfoot! Where do you take a guy like that? More importantly, where do you find a guy like that? You're in luck because our crypto-woo-ologists have a binder full of suitable candidates ready for one hell of a good time. Whether or not our bait survives is up to them. Who says love isn't without a few risks?

Information

  • Creator
    Monster Crush
  • Years Active
    2018 - 2026
  • Episodes
    121
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © Monster Crush
  • Show Website
    Monster Crush