“And those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music.” -Friedrich Nietzche
“One must still have chaos in oneself to be able to give birth to a dancing star.”
-also Friedrich Nietzche
“To live is to suffer, to survive is to find some meaning in the suffering.”
-once again, Friedrich Nietzche
Some things you should know:
#1.) Never Offline is a podcast you can listen to.
#2.) New episodes emerge every Tuesday & Thursday, like the Minotaur making its way out of King Minos of Crete’s fabled labyrinth at Knossos.
#3.) At a surface level, ‘Never Offline’ is simply two grown men (friends since childhood) “discussing” unpredictable and completely random topics that each takes turns selecting; Chris Vuono on Tuesdays, and Brad Jost on Thursdays. Imagine walking into a bar in New Jersey on a Friday night and creeping up behind a group of friends in their mid-twenties or thirties and sitting, listening to every word of a side conversation like a ghost that was obsessed with other people’s social habits- but in a way that is much more authentic than creeping on social media. Also imagine that the two men AREN’T discussing ‘sport ball’ games and teams. The listener is comforted by the genuine camaraderie, affection, and chemistry that the two platonically demonstrate in each episode. You are made to feel as though you are a part of the banter- you actually feel the years of friendship. It’s PALPABLE.
One would be VERY foolish to think that this is merely a “buddy” show; the podcast is deceptively complex, DENSE with cultural meaning, ultimately requiring thorough deconstruction and unpacking. Running gags and perpetuated jokes / characters appear frequently, providing a unifying force that connects one episode to another, much in the vein of Arrested Development. Listeners organically enter their world and vicariously experience their struggle to assign meaning to an increasingly connected (and tragically, ever more disjointed) world around them, recognizing the shared cultural elements that have shaped them. It’s a postmodern masterpiece where anything can happen… a reflection of our relationship to the growing multitudes of intersecting boxes and compartments that form our lives. In a world of senseless destruction and logical incongruities, Jost and Vuono jocularly bounce back and forth with the natural give and take of lightly-seasoned improvisational comedians, generating a treasure trove of addictive and bizarre meme-seedling catch-phrases, strict behavioral mandates for all under 45, and a nearly infinite supply of non-redeemable coupon offers exclusively available to podcast listeners.
In addition to topics, the hosts regularly slip into alternate personalities and play out sketch comedy scenarios, and without missing a beat are back into what is loosely defined as a “topic.’ I imagine most people would make these kinds of moments very awkward, but they follow each other’s lead, no matter how much Brad’s dog Griffyn distracts them in the background with his kooky canine antics. Their relationship and communication can be best described by the chaotic-yet-ordered perfection of a flock of small birds flying in total alignment, changing direction simultaneously with mechanical precision- a common miracle in nature, accomplished without any explicit perceivable direction. Just like a flock of birds evading a predator...
I (a listener that has been there since the beginning) recommend starting with a few recent episodes, and then going back to the beginning to absorb the full import of referenced phrases and reappearing characters. Their language is often explicit, but casually so. F-bombs flow naturally in the course of conversation, “in the parlance of our times”… so it’s probably not one to pump while the kids are hanging around. But, if you want to listen to a couple of funny BFFs wander aimlessly between historic nostalgia, modern social norms, and the absolutely ridiculous- this is what you were waiting for.
They also have a phat synth theme for their show’s intro / outro.
If you don’t like it, “go home; YA OLD.”
