No Longer Ashamed Kevin Bolger and Laurie Hardie

Disclosure is an important step but not one to take lightly

and it is not always the means to find closure

In this episode we discuss what to expect from disclosure and the ways to find closure

We have revised this episode to make it sound better on all platforms


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For survivors shame seems to be a part of life

It always seems to be present with us

It doesn't have to be that way

There are methods to counter the shame that we feel so we handle our shame in a healthier way

So we are not controlled by our shame or identified with it

Instead we can learn to control how we address our shame


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This can be a very divisive topic for survivors

One of the ways that our mind protects us when we experience trauma is to repress the experience

This is helpful to us at the time of trauma but even though the memory is hidden the trauma still affects us

If you have symptoms of trauma without any explanation for these symptoms it can be because the memories have been repressed

Sometimes these memories don't come to the surface until something reminds of us of the trauma later in life

If you are experiencing symptoms of trauma that are affecting you without any obvious explanations it could be because of repressed memories

There are ways to uncover these memories that will help you to understand and recover from this

It is important to find the root issues of your coping disorders rather than just treating them because your mind will often just find other methods to cope until you actually get to the actual trauma that you are hiding from




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It is so important to be aware of coercive control when it is happening in our lives

That is why we revised this episode to make it sound better on all platforms

Coercive control can really affect us if we allow it, so it is important to know how to understand it


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There are so many reasons why it can take so long to tell our story for the first time

The fear of what can happen when we tell is overwhelming sometimes

But that fear doesn't go away the more that we wait

It doesn't get any easier by waiting

Instead what happens when we think that is easier to just cope with it, the ways that we cope with it finally causes us to come to where we hit rock bottom and have to deal with it

Don't wait for that time Do It Now!

Now is the best time to find a way to tell your story in whatever way that you can and find the healing that you deserve

Do it Afraid!

It is scary but you have been through the worst so you know you can handle it and it won't get easier if you wait




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Barbara Lane is one of 11 siblings who were abandoned by their Mother when she was three years old. After she was sent to a Catholic orphanage she and her sister were adopted into a mafia mob family where they endured years of abuse. 43 years later she not only found healing from the abuse, but she was reunited with her sisters. She wrote a book about her remarkable story called "Broken Water" available on amazon.

https://www.amazon.com/Broken-Water-Extraordinary-True-Story/dp/B0BYVFQTCR/ref=sr_1_1?adgrpid=1335909037017621&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.SfT9SR8apFfCmXwm5avW96MZVxduip7Kso2EIdJSyB9BouuU6SWqFSi4sdLV0zVQ.omjQejoeJWlcdpp3ZxMFJ0x5396KQgW-3OUeGG8k4n0&dib_tag=se&hvadid=83494579621405&hvbmt=be&hvdev=c&hvlocphy=67664&hvnetw=o&hvqmt=e&hvtargid=kwd-83495371212886%3Aloc-190&hydadcr=6805_13182700&keywords=broken+water+by+barbara+lane&msclkid=5447c0b8b81a1648c831a54f05885d03&qid=1710734742&sr=8-1


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