No Shrinking Violets Podcast for Women

Mary Rothwell
  • 5.0 (13)
  • MENTAL HEALTH
  • UPDATED WEEKLY

No Shrinking Violets is all about what it truly means for women to take up their space in the world – mind, body and spirit. Mary Rothwell, licensed therapist and certified integrative mental health practitioner, has seen women “stay small” and fit into the space in life that they have been conditioned to believe they deserve. Drawing on 35 years in the mental health field and from her perspective as a woman who was often told to "stay in your lane," Mary discusses how early experiences, society and sometimes our own limiting beliefs can convince us that living inside guardrails is the best -- or only -- option. She'll explore how to recognize our unique essential nature and how to use that to empower a new narrative.Through topics that span psychology, friendships, nature and even gut-brain health, Mary creates a space that is inspiring and authentic - where she celebrates the intuition and power of women who want to chart their own course and program their own GPS. Mary's topics will include sleep and supplements and nutrition and how to live like a plant. (Yes, you read that right - the example of plants is often the most insightful path to knowing what we truly need to feel fulfilled). She’ll talk about setting boundaries, communicating, and relationships, and explore mental health and wellness: trauma and resilience, how our food impacts our mood and the power of simple daily habits. And so much more! As a gardener, Mary knows that violets have been misjudged for centuries and are actually one of the most resilient and ecologically important plants in her native garden. Like violets, women are often underestimated, and they can even mistake their unique gifts for weaknesses. Join Mary to explore all the ways the vibrant and strong violet is an example for finding fulfillment in our own lives.

  1. The Grief of Blindness and the Role of Grit and Gratitude

    3D AGO

    The Grief of Blindness and the Role of Grit and Gratitude

    Thoughts or comments? Send us a text! What if healing isn’t something you finish, but a way you move while you’re still hurting? That question anchors our conversation with author, speaker, and coach Laura Bratton, who was diagnosed at nine with a rare retinal disease and lost her vision over her teen years. The timeline was uncertain, the grief relentless, and the pressure to “stay positive” intense. Laura shares how permission to grieve—given by a college counselor—reframed everything: you can mourn a non-death loss and still take the next step forward. We unpack a more human definition of grit: not grinning and bearing it, but feeling the panic, naming the anger, and choosing meaningful action anyway. Laura explains how gratitude became an empowerment tool when a mentor challenged her to notice the supports that helped her get through hard days. Not gratitude for the adversity, but gratitude for what carries you through it—parents who coach presence, teachers who adapt, friends who stay. Some days the only honest gratitude is that the day is over. That counts. Laura also talks about building the muscle of self-advocacy. When Princeton admitted her to a master’s program and asked her to define her needs, she learned to state requirements clearly, explain why they matter, and accept that she can’t control others’ responses. We explore the role of humor—found later through community—as a gentle way to hold both joy and pain. Along the way, you’ll hear practical tools to navigate change: validate your feelings, ask for help without shame, reframe what you can, and take one more step forward. If you’re facing a diagnosis, divorce, job loss, or any season of uncertainty, this story offers grounded hope and usable practices. Subscribe, share with a friend who needs it, and leave a review to help others find conversations that honor both the hurt and the courage it takes to keep going. You can find Laura at https://www.laurabratton.com/ Support the show Sign up for the launch team for my book, Nature Knows, and get free insider news and surprises at https://maryrothwell.net/natureknows Comments about this episode? Suggestions for a future episode? Email me directly at NSVpodcast@gmail.com. Want to be a guest on No Shrinking Violets Podcast for Women? Send Mary Rothwell a message on PodMatch, here: https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/noshrinkingviolets Follow me on Facebook and Instagram, and check out my website!

    40 min
  2. Shame, Anxiety, And Women With ADHD

    5D AGO

    Shame, Anxiety, And Women With ADHD

    Thoughts or comments? Send us a text! Ever told yourself “just do the thing” while doomscrolling and calling it laziness? We go beneath that loop to decode how ADHD shows up in women: inattentive traits, time blindness, “out of sight, out of mind,” and the quiet ways socialization teaches us to mask chaos until it becomes shame. Licensed therapist Mary Rothwell sits down with ADHD life coach and educator Jorie Houlihan, who was diagnosed at 49, to map the territory from dismissal to validation and the skills that make daily life work. Jorie explains the brain basics—dopamine, norepinephrine, and why frontal lobe filtering misfires—then connects them to real life: forgetting people you love when they’re not in view, struggling to prioritize when everything feels equally urgent, and losing hours to task avoidance even while your inner monologue begs you to start. We break down the overlap with anxiety and depression, how untreated ADHD fuels both, and why hormones matter: cycle shifts and perimenopause can tank dopamine and intensify symptoms. The conversation also tackles emotional dysregulation and rejection sensitivity, naming why women internalize criticism and how language reduces shame. Medication can be transformative, but “pills don’t teach skills.” Jorie offers practical systems: externalizing thoughts, identifying the next micro-step before a break, using visual timers, guarding against novelty burnout, and choosing priorities by consequences and dependencies. We talk about relationships too—how partners can mistake ADHD for indifference, why education helps, and the relief that comes when everyone has a shared map. If you’re wondering where to start, we outline assessment options, therapy for grief and self-talk, and coaching to build daily guardrails that stick. You’re not lazy or broken. You’re learning a new manual for a powerful operating system you’ve had all along. Listen, save your favorite tools, and share this with someone who needs a clearer picture of women’s ADHD. If the episode helped, follow the show or leave a review! You can find Jorie at https://joriehoulihan.com/ Support the show Sign up for the launch team for my book, Nature Knows, and get free insider news and surprises at https://maryrothwell.net/natureknows Comments about this episode? Suggestions for a future episode? Email me directly at NSVpodcast@gmail.com. Want to be a guest on No Shrinking Violets Podcast for Women? Send Mary Rothwell a message on PodMatch, here: https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/noshrinkingviolets Follow me on Facebook and Instagram, and check out my website!

    59 min
  3. Self-Knowledge, Willpower, And Everyday Contentment

    6D AGO

    Self-Knowledge, Willpower, And Everyday Contentment

    Thoughts or comments? Send us a text! What if the pursuit of happiness is leading you away from the life you actually want? We dig into a kinder, sturdier target—equilibrium—and show how to build it through three practical pillars inspired by Arthur C. Brooks’s take on Thomas Aquinas and grounded in lived experience. Instead of chasing constant highs, we lay out a simple framework for steady days: know yourself, focus your passions, and train willpower like a muscle. We start by mapping real routines and frictions. If the gym detour never happens, move the workout into your flow. If washed fruit keeps you on track, prep it once and make the better choice the easy choice. We talk about solitude as fuel, the subtle signals of being off balance, and how mindfulness, prayer, or therapy can turn vague discomfort into clear, actionable insight. Then we pivot to passion without burnout: pruning inputs, picking one priority, and choosing a small repeating action that compounds into identity. Finally, we reframe willpower from a moral test to a trainable skill. Pre-decide your defaults, use environmental cues, and practice progressive resistance—choices that get easier only when your capacity grows. Expect joy to come in flashes and let contentment carry the rest. By the end, you’ll have a compact, human plan for the new year that rejects grand overhauls in favor of honest, sustainable habits that fit your real life. If this resonates, follow the show, share it with a friend who needs a steadier path, and leave a quick review to tell us the one small habit you’re starting this week. Support the show Sign up for the launch team for my book, Nature Knows, and get free insider news and surprises at https://maryrothwell.net/natureknows Comments about this episode? Suggestions for a future episode? Email me directly at NSVpodcast@gmail.com. Want to be a guest on No Shrinking Violets Podcast for Women? Send Mary Rothwell a message on PodMatch, here: https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/noshrinkingviolets Follow me on Facebook and Instagram, and check out my website!

    10 min
  4. Childhood Experiences, Spiritual Narratives and Hope

    12/25/2025

    Childhood Experiences, Spiritual Narratives and Hope

    Thoughts or comments? Send us a text! The shortest days of the year can sharpen our sense of what’s sacred. We lean into that seasonal stillness to tease apart religion as a set of rules and spirituality as a living, breathing experience, then explore how stories shape who we become. Our guest, spiritual guide and facilitator Kristen Swan, shares how a childhood of opposites—chaos and structure, permissive adventure and reserved expectations—sparked a lifelong curiosity about identity, control, and creative freedom. Together we look at why so many women carry invisible labor, over-function in relationships, and deflect simple compliments, and how those reflexes keep us small. From there, we introduce a grounded practice: the spiritual autobiography. Think of it as a living document that traces where you’ve brushed up against the more-than-self, written not to impress but to be true. Kristen walks us through defining key words on our own terms—spirit, prayer, sin, hope—so we can swap borrowed scripts for felt meaning. Through memory prompts and group sharing, this process turns snapshots of life into a map, revealing patterns, resilience, and the places where purpose actually lives. We call it “mapping hope,” the moment you recognize you’re still here after every twist and break, and your story is still unfolding. We also talk practical tools to make reflection stick: small, in-person circles that build community across differences and a prompts journal to declutter the mind, notice patterns, and support better decisions. If the holidays feel heavy or hollow, this conversation offers a gentle reframe and a path back to what matters—your nature, your voice, and your definition of success. If this resonated, follow the show, share it with a friend who needs encouragement, and leave a quick review to help others find us. Support the show Sign up for the launch team for my book, Nature Knows, and get free insider news and surprises at https://maryrothwell.net/natureknows Comments about this episode? Suggestions for a future episode? Email me directly at NSVpodcast@gmail.com. Want to be a guest on No Shrinking Violets Podcast for Women? Send Mary Rothwell a message on PodMatch, here: https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/noshrinkingviolets Follow me on Facebook and Instagram, and check out my website!

    45 min
  5. From Chaos To Calm: Attachment, Trauma, And Choosing Healthy Love

    12/23/2025

    From Chaos To Calm: Attachment, Trauma, And Choosing Healthy Love

    Thoughts or comments? Send us a text! Ever notice how a quiet room can make your heart race when you’re used to slammed doors and sharp words? We dig into why peace can feel unsafe if you grew up around chaos and how that early conditioning shapes what your nervous system calls “normal.” With Dr. Rebecca Payne, a California-based psychologist who specializes in anxiety and relationships, we translate attachment theory into everyday language and practical steps you can use right away. We break down secure, anxious, and avoidant attachment without the jargon, then connect the dots to modern dating dynamics: why the anxious-avoidant loop is so common, how mixed signals keep the nervous system on high alert, and what it takes to rewire those patterns. We talk little t versus big T trauma, how two people can live the same event and experience wildly different outcomes, and how to tell the difference between true resilience and polished suppression. You’ll hear how the amygdala acts like a smoke detector, why your body often “knows” before your brain does, and how headaches, stomach aches, and irritability are often stress messages in disguise. We also tackle the double-edged sword of social media’s mental health boom. Greater openness means more people seek help sooner, but it also fuels self-diagnosis and misused labels. We share guidelines for spotting reliable content and using online language as a starting point, not a sentence. To close, we offer clear strategies to reset what safe feels like: small exposure to calm, consistent routines, naming sensations, and communicating needs. If therapy is on your mind, you’ll get tips on finding a therapist who fits, why consultations matter, and how to measure progress by flexibility rather than perfection. If the familiar keeps pulling you back into old cycles, this conversation gives you a roadmap to choose healthier love and steadier self-trust. Subscribe, share with a friend who needs it, and leave a review telling us one pattern you’re ready to rewrite. You can find Rebecca at https://itsdoctorpayne.com/ Support the show Sign up for the launch team for my book, Nature Knows, and get free insider news and surprises at https://maryrothwell.net/natureknows Comments about this episode? Suggestions for a future episode? Email me directly at NSVpodcast@gmail.com. Want to be a guest on No Shrinking Violets Podcast for Women? Send Mary Rothwell a message on PodMatch, here: https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/noshrinkingviolets Follow me on Facebook and Instagram, and check out my website!

    28 min
  6. Expect The Expected: Navigating Hurtful Family Dynamics

    12/22/2025

    Expect The Expected: Navigating Hurtful Family Dynamics

    Thoughts or comments? Send us a text! Holiday gatherings can feel like a pressure cooker when old dynamics collide with high hopes. We open up about the quiet bargain many of us make—if we do more, maybe they’ll hurt us less—and why that bargain drains joy. Instead, we walk through a practical, compassionate shift: expect the expected. When someone’s track record reliably brings criticism or dismissal, predicting a different outcome sets us up for pain. Grounding our plans in reality doesn’t make us cold; it makes us kinder to ourselves and more present for those who care. We unpack the unpleasable parent pattern and how it sneaks into menu choices, gift lists, and last-minute errands. By asking who we’re doing it for and what response we’re expecting, we reclaim control over our energy and time. If you choose to keep a tradition, do it because it lights you up, not because you hope for a rare compliment. If you decide to scale back, you free space for connection that actually lands—laughter in the kitchen, a quiet cup of tea, a moment of calm after the table is cleared. Boundaries become tools for hospitality, not barriers to it. You’ll hear simple ways to reduce resentment and protect your peace: shorter visits, clear expectations, and a realistic view of how certain relatives behave. We also emphasize redirecting effort toward the people who see you—those who give back the goodwill you offer. Joy grows when approval stops being the scorecard. If the holidays have felt heavy, this conversation offers a path to lighter, truer celebrations that honor your values and your heart. If this resonates, follow the show, share it with a friend who needs gentler holidays, and leave a quick review. Your stories help others find theirs—and help all of us choose joy over approval. Support the show Sign up for the launch team for my book, Nature Knows, and get free insider news and surprises at https://maryrothwell.net/natureknows Comments about this episode? Suggestions for a future episode? Email me directly at NSVpodcast@gmail.com. Want to be a guest on No Shrinking Violets Podcast for Women? Send Mary Rothwell a message on PodMatch, here: https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/noshrinkingviolets Follow me on Facebook and Instagram, and check out my website!

    7 min
  7. Dating After Divorce: How to Trust Yourself to Move On

    12/18/2025

    Dating After Divorce: How to Trust Yourself to Move On

    Thoughts or comments? Send us a text! The hardest part of divorce isn’t signing papers; it’s deciding who you want to be next. Mary sits down with divorce recovery coach Leah Mazur to trace a path from abandonment wounds and serial monogamy to boundaries, standards, and a calmer nervous system. Together we break the old script that says your worth depends on being chosen, and replace it with a practical roadmap for choosing yourself: slowing down, noticing red flags without making excuses, and building a full, satisfying life where partnership is a bonus, not a requirement. Leah’s story begins with profound loss—both parents gone by 21—and the coping patterns that followed. She opens her toolkit: self-reflection over blame, mindfulness, journaling, and the steady practice of acting on intuition. We talk about how to stop dating from a void, how to read behavior over chemistry, and how to shift the internal question from “Do they like me?” to “Do they add value to my life?” For single moms, we cover dating with kids, keeping introductions private until there’s earned trust, and handling mom guilt by modeling courage and healthy coping. We also challenge comparison culture and the myth that staying married equals success; curated feeds don’t reveal the cost behind the smile. If you’re afraid of repeating patterns, this conversation offers concrete ways to change them: enforce boundaries early, honor your body’s signals, and make financial independence a pillar of your peace. When two whole people meet, there’s no fixing project—just alignment. Listen to reclaim your standards, trust your nature, and start the next chapter on your terms. Enjoyed the conversation? Follow, rate, and share the show, then tell us: what boundary will you hold firm on next? Support the show Sign up for the launch team for my book, Nature Knows, and get free insider news and surprises at https://maryrothwell.net/natureknows Comments about this episode? Suggestions for a future episode? Email me directly at NSVpodcast@gmail.com. Want to be a guest on No Shrinking Violets Podcast for Women? Send Mary Rothwell a message on PodMatch, here: https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/noshrinkingviolets Follow me on Facebook and Instagram, and check out my website!

    47 min
  8. Reinventing Midlife: Sobriety, Solo Travel, And Self-Trust

    12/16/2025

    Reinventing Midlife: Sobriety, Solo Travel, And Self-Trust

    Thoughts or comments? Send us a text! What if the anxiety you feel is the exact compass you need? That’s the spark behind this conversation with Tina Coleman—a woman who turned a career-ending car accident, profound grief, and a tangle of old coping habits into a bold new chapter of sobriety, solo travel, and life abroad after 50. We get honest about what midlife actually looks like when you stop apologizing and start experimenting. We dive into the messy middle: how alcohol can sneak in as self-medication, why letting go of anger can be a physical release, and the simple tools that keep you moving when your nervous system is screaming no. Tina shares her go-tos—EFT tapping, box breathing, journaling, walking in nature—and how these practices made airport lines and big moves possible. We also bust menopause myths, from gray hair and desirability to lesser-known symptoms like frozen shoulder and dental shifts. Think of it as adult puberty with smarter choices: better sleep, protein-forward meals, strength training for bone density, and more intentional recovery. These tweaks don’t shrink your life; they expand it. Travel becomes a powerful teacher here. Tina admits she hates the act of traveling but loves the world on the other side of security. That tension is the point. Each small brave act retrains the brain, restores self-trust, and makes room for joy. We talk about embracing language mistakes, laughing with strangers, and using tech like Google Translate to connect. Tina’s bigger vision—beautiful, affordable co-living spaces for women traveling solo—shows how community can turn courage into a lifestyle. If you’ve been waiting for a sign to reinvent, this is it. Press play to learn practical strategies, hear real stories, and feel less alone as you build a life that fits now. If this conversation moves you, subscribe, share it with a friend who needs a nudge, and leave a review to help more women find their second spring. You can find Tina at https://beacons.ai/transformbecourageous Support the show Sign up for the launch team for my book, Nature Knows, and get free insider news and surprises at https://maryrothwell.net/natureknows Comments about this episode? Suggestions for a future episode? Email me directly at NSVpodcast@gmail.com. Want to be a guest on No Shrinking Violets Podcast for Women? Send Mary Rothwell a message on PodMatch, here: https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/noshrinkingviolets Follow me on Facebook and Instagram, and check out my website!

    41 min
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5
out of 5
13 Ratings

About

No Shrinking Violets is all about what it truly means for women to take up their space in the world – mind, body and spirit. Mary Rothwell, licensed therapist and certified integrative mental health practitioner, has seen women “stay small” and fit into the space in life that they have been conditioned to believe they deserve. Drawing on 35 years in the mental health field and from her perspective as a woman who was often told to "stay in your lane," Mary discusses how early experiences, society and sometimes our own limiting beliefs can convince us that living inside guardrails is the best -- or only -- option. She'll explore how to recognize our unique essential nature and how to use that to empower a new narrative.Through topics that span psychology, friendships, nature and even gut-brain health, Mary creates a space that is inspiring and authentic - where she celebrates the intuition and power of women who want to chart their own course and program their own GPS. Mary's topics will include sleep and supplements and nutrition and how to live like a plant. (Yes, you read that right - the example of plants is often the most insightful path to knowing what we truly need to feel fulfilled). She’ll talk about setting boundaries, communicating, and relationships, and explore mental health and wellness: trauma and resilience, how our food impacts our mood and the power of simple daily habits. And so much more! As a gardener, Mary knows that violets have been misjudged for centuries and are actually one of the most resilient and ecologically important plants in her native garden. Like violets, women are often underestimated, and they can even mistake their unique gifts for weaknesses. Join Mary to explore all the ways the vibrant and strong violet is an example for finding fulfillment in our own lives.

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