Normalizing Non-Monogamy - Personal Stories of Polyamory, Swinging, and Beyond

Emma and Fin
  • 4.6 (282)
  • Sexuality
  • Updated Weekly

Hi! We’re your hosts Emma and Fin! We’re a married couple in our late thirties and we’ve been exploring non-monogamy in different ways since nearly the beginning of our relationship more than twenty years ago. But, this podcast isn’t about us… We strongly believe there isn’t a “right way” to be non-monogamous or even that non-monogamy is better or more evolved than monogamy or any other relationship style. Every week we interview people from across the spectrums of gender, sexuality, and relationship style to learn from their incredible and powerful personal stories.  Each episode is a unique perspective and personal story… Pick one that sounds interesting and give it a listen! We hope that by sharing the amazing journeys of those who are redefining and pushing the limits of what’s possible in relationships that we can show people that they’re not alone and inspire us all to embrace our true selves so that, together, we can open minds and live authentically without shame.

  1. 4d ago

    Ep 446 - Reid

    Join us for this incredible conversation as Reid shares his personal origin story of becoming the queer polyamorous slut that he is today. He also takes us behind the scenes into his journey of becoming a sex educator, and how his work was often inspired by his own need to learn and figure out how to do sex and relationships in a better way. And… Along the way we uncover a ton of tips, tricks, and wisdom that Reid has learned over the years and how he uses the tools he teaches to improve his own life and relationships.  As seen on NETFLIX' "Chelsea Does..." alongside Chelsea Handler, Reid Mihalko (he/him) of ReidAboutSex.com is an internationally known sex and relationship geek who helps adults create more self-esteem, self-confidence, and greater health and accountability in their relationships and sex lives using an inspiring mixture of humor, personal stories, keen insight, and comprehensive sexual health information.  In early 2018, some very brave people came forward during #MeToo sharing harms that Reid had caused them. Reid stepped down from teaching and initiated a restorative justice-based accountability process to address his misconduct and make amends if and where possible. The formal, year-long process along with Reid’s apology and resources were shared publicly and can be found at TinyURL.com/reidaccountability. Going forward, Reid’s projects and appearances will include pointing people towards resources and experts on restorative and transformative justice-based accountability processes. Reid’s workshops and college lectures have been attended by over 60,000 people from all over the globe. He has appeared in media such as Oprah's Our America With Lisa Ling on OWN, NETFLIX, Montel, Dr. Phil's The Doctors on CBS, Bravo's Miss Advised, Fox News, in Newsweek, Seventeen, GQ, The Washington Post, and in thirteen countries and at least seven languages. Reid is also founder of Sex Geek Summer Camp, Sex Geek Conservatory, and Sex Geek School for Gifted Sex Geeks, which help sex educators learn valuable business skills that allow them to reach more people with greater ease, transform more lives, and make a better living as sexperts. Check out the full show notes here. Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet!   Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

    1h 34m

  2. May 20

    Ep 445 - Courtney

    Courtney is a polyamorous mother of three who’s been married for over 21 years and has only recently began exploring polyamory, and her sexual self, after slowly deconstructing her religious upbringing. Courtney's marriage had become really challenging and about four years ago she proposed the idea of opening up so she could get her needs met. It didn’t go well. At one point, she even told her husband that she wasn’t in love with him anymore because she had so much anger and resentment.  And now, just a few years later, they’ve opened their relationship, Courtney has a new-ish long-distance partner, and as you’ll hear… She and her husband are more in love than they’ve ever been. Heck, they even started a YouTube channel together! Of course, it wasn't quite that easy! The journey Courtney, and her husband, have been on together and individually has been incredibly difficult, healing, and is so inspiring. Join us today as she shares her beautiful and powerful story with us!  Courtney Boyer, M.Ed., M.S., is a therapist-turned-relationship coach, writer, and speaker helping people navigate love, sex, and modern relationships with more honesty, freedom, and authenticity. As the in-house Sex Expert for Pjur’s U.K. market and author of Not Tonight, Honey and Opened, Courtney brings both professional expertise and lived experience to conversations about desire, communication, and redefining relationships outside the mainstream. Check out all of Courtney's work on her website! Check out the full show notes here. Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet!   Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

    1h 11m

  3. May 13

    Ep 444 - Andre

    In this beautiful conversation, Andre takes us through the powerful journey of self-discovery and growth he’s been on since stepping away from the military and into the liberating culture of San Francisco about 12 years ago. Andre loves the freedom to explore the endless possibilities of each unique connection he makes and he’s learned so much about himself, and what it means to be human, along the way.  From learning to befriend jealousy to practicing boundaries in order to better care for himself, Andre shares a ton of wisdom in this interview. We also dig into some incredible stories from his adventures over the years… Have you ever been banned from a hospital? Andre has. Stick around for the bonus episode to hear all about it! Andre has since moved from The Bay Area but his adventures and explorations in non-monogamy and open relating have continued and expanded into his work and career as a Somatic Intimacy Guide and Coach. Through his practice, Coming Closer, Andre supports individuals and couples across a wide range of needs: men facing midlife performance concerns, survivors of trauma seeking safety, long-term partners wanting to revive passion, and those exploring alternatives such as ethical non-monogamy. Andre is also known for his role on the UK television series Virgin Island, where he appeared as a professional surrogate partner helping participants confront intimacy challenges alongside licensed therapists. The program drew national attention, and Andre’s presence on screen highlighted how intimacy work is not about performance but about safety, consent, and the courage to connect. We highly recommend you check out Virgin Island and all of Andre’s work! Check out the full show notes here. Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet!   Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

    1h 13m

  4. May 6

    Ep 443 - Leah: Round 2

    When Leah first joined us five and a half years ago on Episode 146 she was only about a month into exploring non-monogamy after meeting someone who was partnered on a dating app. Leah has always been bit of a relationship junky and over the last few years she’s really been digging into what she wants and what truly works for her in relationships. Today, Leah shares about her experiences in dating as a solo poly person and she also talks about how she’s been very intentional in creating a life full of adventure and connection that doesn’t rely on having sexual and romantic partners. She’s definitely open to it and desires it, but she’s formed deep and intimate friendships and community that fill her cup most of the way up.  Leah is also the creator and curator of the Esther Perel Discussion Group on Facebook which has over 16 thousand people in it… Later in the interivew she shares how she built a community that brings together all sorts of people who are interested in relationships, but in particular how she created a safe space where people who’ve been on all sides of infidelity can come together. It’s mind-blowing and we highly recommend you check it out! Check out the full show notes here. Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet!   Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

    56 min

  5. Apr 29

    Ep 442 - Andy + Daniel (Bonus)

    We're celebrating our eight-year podcast anniversary this week by sharing this bonus conversation with Andy and Daniel with everyone! 🥳 Normally, these bonus episodes are part of our Premium Subscription. If you want more bonus content like this, you can join here for just $4/mo! Enjoy! Check out the full show notes here. Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet!   Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

    18 min

  6. Apr 29

    Ep 442 - Andy + Daniel

    We had such a great conversation with Daniel the first time we had him on the podcast that we told him to come back and bring his dad. It took us six years, but Daniel’s back… And, he brought his dad.  This is a first for us and it’s an absolutely incredible conversation as we get to hear Daniel and Andy talk about their individual experiences of exploring non-monogamy and how they impacted and influenced each other along the way. We also talk about what they’ve learned from one another, new relationship energy, conscious hierarchy, and “The Big Why” behind polyamory and non-monogamy for each of them. Oh… And we get to hear some truly fantastic stories in the bonus episode! Normally, the bonus episodes are part of our Premium Subscription but we're celebrating our eight-year podcast anniversary this week by sharing our bonus conversation with Andy and Daniel with everyone! 🥳 If you want more bonus content like this, you can join here for just $4/mo! Check out the full show notes here. Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet!   Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

    1h 11m

  7. Apr 22

    Ep 441 - Pandora + Chesed

    Join us as Pandora and Chesed share their explorations in polyamory, dating, kink, play parties and so much more. They've been sex friends since 2023, and like to use the term “otter partners” to describe their playful, cuddly connection. Throughout our conversation it's clear how adventurous they both are and how they seamlessly weave the kinky and sexy side of things into their everyday lives. Since 2025, Pandora and Chesed have been collaborators at SlutStack, a blog and podcast for overthinking sex and relationships (and sharing stories of wholesome degeneracy). They also co-organized the first SlutCon in 2025 with Aella. SlutCon is a multi-day sexuality education conference and celebration of SlutHood. Pandora (aka Dr. Bimbo) is a Berkeley-based blogger with about a decade of ethical non-monogamy experience. She writes at SlutStack about sex, kink, dating, and polyamory. After completing her PhD in engineering, she left academia to try out life as a full-time slut. Lately, she had been enjoying leaning into kitchen table polyamory, including navigating life in a group house with her boyfriends. Chesed (aka little otter) is an East Bay-based writer and collaborator at SlutStack. She also has a day job in healthcare, and will be raising her first kid by the time this episode airs. Chesed is best described as "surprisingly agentic for a sex doll." She is married, and she and her husband live with two other ethically non-monogamous couples. She is one of the most poly “not poly” people you’ll meet. Check out the full show notes here. Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet!   Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

    1h 14m

  8. Apr 15

    Ep 440 - Anna: Round 2

    It’s been almost exactly four years to the day since we last talked with Anna back on Episode 231 and it’s no surprise that our conversation today is just as incredible as the last! No need to go back and listen to their first episode to get a ton out of this one, but we definitely recommend checking it out afterwards! It’s been a big few years for Anna… We talk about some changes in their partnership and living situation, we have a beautiful conversation about their journey of exploring and figuring out gender, we dig into their relationship with kink, and so much more! Anna has also recently experienced some heartbreaking losses which led to a powerful and moving conversation about loss, grief, and healing. Oh... And if you stick around for the bonus episode as part of the Premium Subscription Anna tells some mind-blowing orgasm stories! Wait, are the orgasms mind-blowing or the stories? Perhaps both... Join us to find out! Anna Baxter is the owner, director, and supervisor at Love Positive Counseling. They are incredibly passionate about providing a safe space for individuals and families to find their innate potential and achieve their dreams, regardless of gender, orientation, race, religion, neurotype or love-style. You can learn more about Anna and their work over on their website! Check out the full show notes here. Join us at Relationship Recess in May 2026! Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet!   Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

    1h 3m
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4.6
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282 Ratings

About

Hi! We’re your hosts Emma and Fin! We’re a married couple in our late thirties and we’ve been exploring non-monogamy in different ways since nearly the beginning of our relationship more than twenty years ago. But, this podcast isn’t about us… We strongly believe there isn’t a “right way” to be non-monogamous or even that non-monogamy is better or more evolved than monogamy or any other relationship style. Every week we interview people from across the spectrums of gender, sexuality, and relationship style to learn from their incredible and powerful personal stories.  Each episode is a unique perspective and personal story… Pick one that sounds interesting and give it a listen! We hope that by sharing the amazing journeys of those who are redefining and pushing the limits of what’s possible in relationships that we can show people that they’re not alone and inspire us all to embrace our true selves so that, together, we can open minds and live authentically without shame.

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