Notes from the Edge

Gamut Podcast Network

Notes From the Edge is where polished stories end and the truth begins. Hosted by writer, trauma educator, executive advisor, and author Lisa Lacy, this globally ranked podcast explores survival, identity, trauma, addiction, recovery, leadership, relationships, and reinvention through raw, deeply human conversations. No scripts. No small talk. Just the stories we were taught to hide, the roles we performed to survive, and the truths that set us free. What did you perform in order to survive? Welcome to the edge. www.lisalacy.com

  1. 23h ago

    What Do We Reach for When Purpose Is Gone? PTSD, Gambling Addiction & Life After War with Sean Carberry

    What do we reach for when the thing that gave us purpose, identity, adrenaline, and belonging is suddenly gone? Sean Carberry is an award-winning journalist and former NPR Kabul correspondent whose experience raises a difficult question: what happens when you come home from years of danger, but your mind and body are still wired to look for it? In this episode of Notes From the Edge, Sean and Lisa Lacy talk about what happened after Afghanistan, when Sean returned to civilian life carrying undiagnosed PTSD, without the structure, intensity, or sense of purpose that had defined his years overseas. He describes walking into a Maryland casino about six weeks after coming home, initially gambling a few hundred dollars, and how the risk, rewards, recognition, casino perks, and escalating bets gradually began filling something that was missing outside those walls. The conversation goes far beyond gambling. Sean talks candidly about identity loss, loneliness, relationships, the psychological impact of years spent witnessing human suffering, and eventually recognizing patterns he could not see while he was living inside them. He also discusses how writing became part of processing his experiences and why we need to take much more seriously what happens when veterans, journalists, humanitarian workers, and others who have spent years operating in dangerous environments are expected to simply come home and resume ordinary life. In this episode: • PTSD after war and conflict reporting • Gambling addiction and compulsive gambling • Adrenaline seeking, risk, and the nervous system • Identity loss after leaving high-intensity environments • Returning home and adjusting to civilian life • Why danger can begin to feel familiar • Casino rewards, validation, and escalating gambling behavior • Loneliness, relationships, and destructive coping patterns • Mental health among journalists and war correspondents • Supporting veterans, reporters, humanitarian workers, and civilians after high-risk assignments • Why being functional does not necessarily mean someone is okay • Writing, memoir, and processing trauma • Learning to recognize patterns before they become destructive • Why coming home deserves as much attention as going into danger Sean’s work and books: passport-stamps.com Lisa Lacy and Notes From the Edge: lisalacy.com What did you perform in order to survive? Welcome to the Edge. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

    What Do We Reach for When Purpose Is Gone? PTSD, Gambling Addiction & Life After War with Sean Carberry
  2. 3d ago

    Why Do We Self-Sabotage? EFT, Nervous System Safety & Trauma Responses with Carol Look

    What if the behavior you’re trying hardest to get rid of was once the very thing that helped you survive? Carol Look is a psychotherapist and founding EFT Master who has spent decades helping people understand the emotional patterns underneath self-sabotage, and why lasting change often begins with asking what the behavior is protecting us from. In this episode of Notes From the Edge, Carol and Lisa Lacy explore the idea that the problem was once the solution. Addiction, procrastination, people pleasing, overworking, staying invisible, and even creating chaos can serve a purpose when the nervous system believes they are keeping us safe. Carol explains why we are wired for safety before success, and why someone can consciously want more visibility, healthier relationships, greater success, or a completely different life while unconsciously pulling themselves backward when the next level doesn’t feel safe. Lisa shares her own experience of appearing highly successful while privately unraveling, using alcohol to avoid painful emotions, and later discovering how uncomfortable peace and stillness could feel after years of chaos. They also talk about functional freeze, grief, hypervigilance, the importance of mentorship, learning to regulate reactivity, and what becomes possible when we stop asking, “What is wrong with me?” and start asking, “Why am I doing this, and what is it protecting me from?” Carol also shares how growing up in an alcoholic family shaped her tendency to take care of everyone around her, how that survival skill eventually became an asset in her work, and why learning to extend that same care toward herself changed everything. In this episode: Why self-sabotage may actually be a protective responseNervous system regulation and why safety comes before successFear of success, visibility, and “up-leveling”Why procrastination can have an emotional payoffAddiction as a way of anesthetizing difficult emotionsEFT tapping and Emotional Freedom TechniquesTrauma responses, hypervigilance, and emotional patternsWhy peace and stillness can initially feel uncomfortableFunctional freeze and appearing capable while internally checked outGrief, emotional avoidance, and learning to feel againPeople pleasing and taking care of others as survival strategiesWhy changing your own reactivity can change your relationshipsGratitude, emotional well-being, and Carol’s Yes workThe value of mentorship and support in personal growthWhy healing doesn’t mean life stops being difficultThe power of stillness, space, and finally hearing yourself Learn more about Carol Look and her work: www.carollook.com Learn more about Lisa Lacy and Notes From the Edge: www.lisalacy.com What did you perform in order to survive? Welcome to the Edge. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

    Why Do We Self-Sabotage? EFT, Nervous System Safety & Trauma Responses with Carol Look
  3. 5d ago

    When You Can’t Afford to Fall Apart: Grief, Fatherhood & Starting Over with Lee Ehlers

    What happens when everyone needs you to be okay, but you’re barely surviving yourself? Hollywood screenwriter and producer Lee Ehlers spent years learning how to survive rejection, but nothing prepared him for the loss of his wife, Erin, or for discovering that sometimes the strongest thing you can do is stop pretending you’re okay. Lee’s professional breakthrough and personal devastation collided when his feature film EXES was finally being made as his high school sweetheart and wife of twenty years was dying from breast cancer. Suddenly widowed with children who were just 10, 7, and 5, Lee found himself trying to grieve while becoming the person they still needed every day. We talk about the private cost of performing the “strong dad,” the period when alcohol became the only way he could sleep through overwhelming grief, and the moment he finally admitted, “I’m not okay. I’m struggling.” In this episode: Grief after the death of a spouseWidowed fatherhood and raising children through lossPerforming strength when you’re falling apartDepression, isolation, and asking for helpSelf-medication and coping with acute griefWhy grief doesn’t follow a predictable processSupporting someone who is grieving without prescribing how they should healThe strange collision of happy memories and devastating lossStarting over after losing the person you built your life withIdentity after lossPersistence through rejection and uncertaintyNearly two decades of pursuing a Hollywood careerScreenwriting, creativity, and finding your own writing processWhat repeated rejection can teach us about survivalThe making of EXESWhy saying “I’m not okay” can be the beginning of getting help Watch Lee Ehlers’ film EXES on Amazon: EXES on Amazon ⁠ Lisa Lacy | Notes From the Edge: https://www.lisalacy.com What did you perform in order to survive? Welcome to the Edge. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

    When You Can’t Afford to Fall Apart: Grief, Fatherhood & Starting Over with Lee Ehlers
  4. 6d ago

    Why men are lonely and healthy masculinity with Michael Ostrolenk

    What if real masculine strength has less to do with pushing harder and more to do with learning how to regulate yourself, feel deeply, and stay present under pressure? Michael Ostrolenk, licensed marriage and family therapist and master coach, joins Lisa Lacy to explore one central idea: mature masculinity is not domination, suppression, or performance. It is self-governance. Michael introduces his concept of “Negative 20X,” challenging high performers to consider whether slowing down may require more courage than pushing harder. Lisa and Michael also unpack his Sovereign Gentleman framework, including how unconscious conditioning shapes identity, why men need spaces to experience and express emotion, and what disciplined presence actually looks like inside a relationship. In this episode: Healthy masculinity and masculine maturityNervous system regulation under pressureThe Sovereign Gentleman and psychological sovereigntyMale loneliness, mentorship, friendship, and the need for tribeWhy high performers struggle with rest and recovery“Negative 20X” and the drive to constantly prove yourselfEmotional intelligence, anger, sadness, shame, and healthy expressionMasculinity versus dominationDisciplined presence during relationship conflictHow childhood and cultural conditioning shape adult identityMartial arts, self-defense, capability, and personal responsibility Why kindness can be an expression of strength Connect with Michael Ostrolenk: Website: www.michaeldostrolenk.com Substack: Michael D. Ostrolenk / @michaeldostrolenk LinkedIn: Michael Ostrolenk, MA, MFT YouTube: @michaeldostrolenk Podcast: Resilience Redefined with Michael D. Ostrolenk Team Fudoshin: teamfudoshin.com Connect with Lisa Lacy: What did you perform in order to survive?  Welcome to the Edge. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

    Why men are lonely and healthy masculinity with Michael Ostrolenk
  5. Sep 1

    Emotional Sobriety, Addiction Recovery & Healing What Still Hurts with Dr. Dean & HollyKem Sunseri

    What happens when you stop the addiction, but the pain underneath it is still running your life? Dr. Dean Sunseri, licensed professional counselor, and HollyKem Sunseri, certified life coach with more than four decades in recovery, explore the work they call emotional sobriety: healing the emotional wounds and protective patterns that can remain long after the substance or destructive behavior is gone. In this conversation, we go beyond abstinence and into what Dean and HollyKem call Stage Two recovery. We talk about why unresolved pain can “seep out” through substitute addictions, anger, isolation, control, relationship conflict, or other coping behaviors, and why simply stopping a behavior doesn’t necessarily heal what created it. They walk us through their framework of the Protector, Wounded Child, and True Self, including how learning to recognize which part of us is speaking can restore choice instead of leaving us controlled by old survival responses. We also explore relationships, why one person changing can change the entire “dance,” and why reconnecting may need to happen before a couple can actually solve the problem they’re fighting about. In this episode: Emotional sobriety and Stage Two addiction recoveryWhy abstinence may be only the beginning of healingSubstance addiction, behavioral addiction, and substitute addictionsThe emotional pain underneath compulsive and self-destructive behaviorThe Protector, Wounded Child, and True SelfTrauma, triggers, and protective survival responsesWhy healing doesn’t mean never being triggered againLearning to love the parts of yourself you once tried to escapeSelf-compassion versus shame in addiction recoveryMoving from survival mode into choice, purpose, and emotional freedomRelationships, resentment, defensiveness, and emotional disconnectionWhy one partner’s growth can change the relationship dynamicReconnecting before trying to resolve conflictBoundaries, responsibility, forgiveness, and healthy communicationFinding purpose after addiction and survival Dr. Dean & HollyKem Sunseri: 1. Take the free Emotional Sobriety Assessment: https://dean-jsegmrly.scoreapp.com 2. Get the Book A Roadmap to the Soul Today! https://amzn.to/478rNG8 3. Learn more about Dean & HollyKem Sunseri: https://www.ihaveavoice.com 4. Watch Free Videos on Emotional Sobriety: https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLsbxvHYHG8El81rdV6eQ7gM7S55jXPm49&si=FOa14n7V-5OLJOQJ Lisa Lacy | Notes From the Edge: https://www.lisalacy.com What did you perform in order to survive? Welcome to the Edge. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

    Emotional Sobriety, Addiction Recovery & Healing What Still Hurts with Dr. Dean & HollyKem Sunseri
  6. Aug 29

    Who Told You That? | Solo Episode with Lisa Lacy

    Who told you that you were too sensitive, too difficult, selfish, dramatic, unstable, or simply too much? And when did someone else’s opinion become part of your identity? In this solo episode of Notes From the Edge, trauma educator Lisa Lacy explores how labels, family roles, survival adaptations, and other people’s perceptions can quietly become the stories we tell ourselves about who we are, and what can happen when we finally question who handed us those stories in the first place. Lisa examines the difference between personality and adaptation, why competence can become armor, and how a label can stop an investigation before it ever begins. She also shares how this question has surfaced while writing Notes From a Certified Madwoman, now autofiction, and why sometimes finding yourself is less about becoming someone new and more about subtracting everybody else. In this episode: How childhood and relationship labels can become identity“Too sensitive,” “difficult,” “selfish,” and the power of labelingCompetence as strength versus competence as survival armorWhy boundaries can feel threatening to people who benefited from your complianceFamily roles, scapegoating, and resistance when one person changesThe difference between accountability and self-erasureSurvival adaptations that become adult personality traitsWhy proving a label wrong can still allow it to control your lifeWhat happens when you enter an environment where you are no longer “too much”The question that can interrupt an old identity: Who told you that? Connect with Lisa Lacy: https://lisalacy.com What did you perform in order to survive? Welcome to the Edge. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

    Who Told You That? | Solo Episode with Lisa Lacy
  7. Aug 28

    Men’s Mental Health, Loneliness & Healthy Masculinity with Jason Lange

    What happens when men are taught that vulnerability is weakness, but connection is exactly what they need most? Jason Lange is a men’s embodiment coach and group facilitator who believes men don’t need to become tougher. They need the language, relationships, and spaces that allow them to become more fully human. In this conversation, Jason shares how growing up without emotional or physical connection left him unable to understand what was happening inside his own body, eventually leading to shame, isolation, and unhealthy ways of coping. He takes us inside the somatic breakthrough that changed everything and explains why men’s groups became one of the most powerful forces in his own healing, relationships, and life. In this episode: Men’s mental health and the male loneliness epidemicHealthy masculinity and breaking out of the “man box”Why vulnerability can feel dangerous for menEmotional neglect, shame, and disconnectionSomatic therapy and nervous system healingMen’s groups, brotherhood, and co-regulationPorn, alcohol, overworking, and other forms of emotional numbingBuilding emotional intimacy in relationshipsLearning to identify wants, needs, feelings, and boundariesMoving beyond the isolated “lone wolf” model of masculinityAuthenticity instead of performing that everything is fine Connect with Jason Lange: LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jasonmlange/ Evolutionary Men: https://evolutionary.men Evolutionary Edge Quiz: https://evolutionary.men/quiz Connect with Lisa Lacy: https://www.lisalacy.com What did you perform in order to survive? Welcome to the Edge. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

    Men’s Mental Health, Loneliness & Healthy Masculinity with Jason Lange
4.9
out of 5
133 Ratings

About

Notes From the Edge is where polished stories end and the truth begins. Hosted by writer, trauma educator, executive advisor, and author Lisa Lacy, this globally ranked podcast explores survival, identity, trauma, addiction, recovery, leadership, relationships, and reinvention through raw, deeply human conversations. No scripts. No small talk. Just the stories we were taught to hide, the roles we performed to survive, and the truths that set us free. What did you perform in order to survive? Welcome to the edge. www.lisalacy.com