Open Late

Open Late

Welcome to Open Late, a deep dive into all kinds of relationships. Let’s explore the multi-faceted, frequently misunderstood, dynamics of polyamory and being “open” even means.  Weekly on this podcast, you’ll hear about my personal journey with Opening Up, and uncovering the deep and intricate layers of our hearts as expressed in the ways we love others and ourselves.     If you’re interested in relationships as a container for growth and deeper knowing of your truest self you’re in the right place. If you’re interested in adding more spice and sexiness to your life you’re also in the right place. Each episode we’ll share candid real-life experiences (and or stories), knowledge and tools to support you in creating your own relationship magic.   Open Late is for anyone who wants to explore with respect, curiosity, and deepen their self-awareness in order to create a conscious relationship whether you’re monogamous, ish, poly or dating everyone.

  1. 11/08/2023

    Introducing your New Host

    In this episode of the Open Late Podcast, there's a unique twist as Jess welcomes Drea Renee back to the studio. However, this time, after more than 2 years, Jess finds herself in the guest seat. It's a significant moment as the show introduces its new host, Drea, an expert specializing in love and dependency, who will be taking over Open Late Podcast while Jess is on maternity leave. They engage in a conversation about Jess's reflections on the future of Open Late and why Drea is the ideal substitute host for this period. They discuss the next steps for the podcast and provide insights into what Jess and Pasha's parenting style will look like. Drea shares her experience of seeing Pasha and Jess in the wild as a polyamorous couple, and they delve into the topic of people trying to protect someone they believe is being cheated on by their partner. As the episode concludes, Jess surprises Drea with a heartfelt gift to mark the beginning of her upcoming journey as the host, and she takes her last bow, at least for now. In this Episode of Open Late: New host of Open Late Delving into the podcast's future Exploring diverse parenting styles The dynamics of “protecting” a polyamorous friend Last Goodbyes and Firsts Welcome Backs Connect with Drea: • Instagram: @thedrearenee Connect with Jessica: • Instagram: @journey.with.jessica | @openlatethepodcast • Website: openlatepodcast.com  • YouTube: Open Late Podcast • What's my relationship style? Take the Open Late Quiz • Join our free chat community, "Open Talks" on WhatsApp • Open Late Dictionary 00:30 It's official. I am taking over for Jess while she's on maternity leave. - Drea Renee 2:45 I had the realization just a few weeks ago that being a mother is a short-lived little window. - Jessica Esfandiary 4:43 I love a camera and a microphone. I'm always down for it. - Drea Renee 9:28 I would love to sing to my babies, sing to them or write little songs for them. But I feel like writing will be something that'll be, like, manageable. - Jessica Esfandiary 10:30 I Think is the exhilaration of like having this new love and watching Pasha become a father, that makes me so excited - Jessica Esfandiary 12:43 If I could have a partner that is consistent, that knows me and that knows my circumstance and my relationship that's familiar, I think I would maybe go out here and there when time permits. - Jessica Esfandiary 15:28 I want it to be fluid where it's not this thing where we sit our kids down one day. And we're like, we have something to tell you. Mommy and daddy are in an open relationship, we're not doing that. - Jessica Esfandiary 16:22 Children learn what they live and they learn what love is based on what they see. - Jessica Esfandiary 21:27 I like to split up my emotions because I think, like, jealousy is a little bit lazy. I think that there's envy, there's fear of abandonment, like all there micro emotions underneath it. - Jessica Esfandiary 23:57 What's meant for you, won't miss you. The Universe does not f**k up - Jessica Esfandiary  Take advantage of a 30% discount on Dr. Zhana's eligible courses with code "JESSICA", applied to the first payment only for offers with multiple payments or subscriptions. • Open Smarter Course The product I love who support this show: • Honey Pot Lube and Massage Oil OPENLATE20 • The Oh Club OPENLATE • Desire Resorts  This is a Sabbatical Jess Production Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    31 min
  2. 11/01/2023

    Jess and Pasha the End of an Era

    In this episode of the Open Late Podcast, after more than a year, Jess welcomes back Pasha, her husband and highly requested guest. Together, they open up about the challenges they've faced and conquered, sharing the intimate details of how they navigated and overcame the struggles that life threw their way. They explore the topic of workaholism, shedding light on how it can impact not only one's personal life but also their relationship, emphasizing the potential consequences when a relationship isn't actively nurtured. They speak openly about their decision to seek therapy, offering insights into why they embarked on this journey together and what they've learned along the way. They also express views on jealousy, discussing how to handle it and why confronting it is important. With the anticipation of their twins' arrival, Jess and Pasha take us through their preparations, they also share their biggest fears and concerns as they look ahead to becoming parents to two precious babies. Furthermore, Jess and Pasha generously devote time to respond to questions from their listeners, offering thoughtful and practical advice on a range of topics, including relationship dynamics and life's unpredictable twists and turns. In this Episode of Open Late: Raw insights and dynamics of a polyamorous marriage Overcoming personal challenges and addressing jealousy The impact of workaholism on your relationship Couples Therapy and why is it okay to seek it Preparations for the twins and the biggest fears Mentioned in the Episode: • Podcast: Your Partner is NOT your superhero Connect with Pasha: • Instagram: @pashaesfandiary Connect with Jessica: • Instagram: @journey.with.jessica | @openlatethepodcast • Website: openlatepodcast.com  • YouTube: Open Late Podcast • What's my relationship style? Take the Open Late Quiz • Join our free chat community, "Open Talks" on WhatsApp • Open Late Dictionary 5:18 We've always been like such an open book with each other, and that's always worked for us because we love open communication. We love to over communicate, and we never wanted to have any secrets. - Jessica Esfandiary 6:20 I'm looking for something meaningful right now. I'm not looking for just hookups. - Pasha Esfandiary 9:46 Specially moving into this season of becoming a mom is like, I know how sacred my energy is and I dont have a lot of it right now - Jessica Esfandiary  16:09 I think that I and you as well took our relationship for granted and didn't realize that it was like its own living organism that needed care and attention and focus truly, and that it needs to have like energy poured into it. - Jessica Esfandiary 18:48 I think it's really important to know that I've made a massive effort that after five or 6:00, there's no work. - Pasha Esfandiary 23:09 Jealousy is a tool and an indicator to something that you can work on that is deeper and more prevalent -Pasha Esfandiary 40:33 At some point any new partner you get will not satisfy every single one of your needs to the way that we have dreamed up in our society. - Pasha Esfandiary 44:08 Being with other people can create more desire and chemistry within your own relationship -Jessica Esfandiary  49:17 People become more understanding with education and just if you're authentic, they're going to be authentic too. - Pasha Esfandiary 51:58 I do see myself coming back and see this show growing and evolving with me as I become a mom, a polyamorous mother of twins. - Jessica Esfandiary Take advantage of a 30% discount on Dr. Zhana's eligible courses with code "JESSICA", applied to the first payment only for offers with multiple payments or subscriptions. • Open Smarter Course The product I love who support this show: • Honey Pot Lube and Massage Oil OPENLATE20 • The Oh Club OPENLATE • Desire Resorts  This is a Sabbatical Jess Production Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    55 min
  3. 10/25/2023

    The Journey of Open Late Podcast

    In this episode of Open Late, Jess goes solo and provides listeners with a personal life update. She shares her excitement and anticipation as her baby twins are nearing their arrival, and how this has triggered a profound transformation in all aspects of her life. As the Open Late Podcast celebrates its two-year anniversary, Jess reflects on the journey so far, highlighting the growth and evolution of the show. She offers insights into the preparations for her upcoming motherhood journey, giving listeners a glimpse into the challenges and joys that come with it. Jess also shares a snippet of her lactation journey, providing a glimpse into the unique experiences and challenges she's encountered as she prepares to welcome her twins. As a special treat, Jess has a big surprise in store for the end of the episode, ensuring that listeners will be in for an exciting and memorable conclusion. Join Jess on this deeply personal and celebratory episode of Open Late. In this Open Late episode: Jess's recent life update The imminent arrival of the twins Celebrating Open Late's 2nd Birthday Reflecting on the show's growth and evolution Embracing new beginnings    Connect with Jessica: • Instagram: @journey.with.jessica | @openlatethepodcast • Website: openlatepodcast.com  • YouTube: Open Late Podcast • What's my relationship style? Take the Open Late Quiz • Join our free chat community, "Open Talks" on WhatsApp • Open Late Dictionary 00:36 We are expecting twins very soon, and that has turned my life upside down and on its head in ways that I could never imagine. And I have grown so much as a woman just by preparing for these sweet, special little beings. – Jessica Esfandiary  2:27 Over the last two years, I have really interviewed all of the people that I wanted to. – Jessica Esfandiary   5:31 It's been a blast. And I've learned and I've grown so much by doing this. – Jessica Esfandiary   6:56 The decision was not an easy one in the beginning, but the closer I get to the birth of my babies, the more clear it becomes that I want to focus solely on motherhood. – Jessica Esfandiary   7:32 I am a relationship junkie, and I know that the relationship that I have with my son and daughter will be the most important. – Jessica Esfandiary   9:03 Open Late podcast is actually not going away. I'm just going to hibernate in these days with my breast pump and breastfeeding two babies at once. – Jessica Esfandiary   10:44 Because as I've mentioned here many times, Pasha and I do not plan on closing our relationship. We both have previous partners that are still friends in our lives, that still come in and out of our lives, and something were to happen, I want you all to be the first to know about it. – Jessica Esfandiary   13:49 Thank you for understanding that this is such a major life shift for me and I want to be as present as possible for it. You know, this podcast, it really changed me. – Jessica Esfandiary 14:19 So thank you, for helping me own my choices as a woman and the way that I love publicly. – Jessica Esfandiary 14:36 I've had to grow as a woman owning who I am, owning my sexuality and owning my non-monogamy publicly has been one of the greatest gifts of my life, and it's really helped shape who I am and shape how I see the world and more than anything, I feel complete in this part of the journey. – Jessica Esfandiary Take advantage of a 30% discount on Dr. Zhana's eligible courses with code "JESSICA", applied to the first payment only for offers with multiple payments or subscriptions. •     Open Smarter Course The product I love who support this show: • Honey Pot Lube and Massage Oil OPENLATE20 • The Oh Club OPENLATE • Desire Resorts    This is a Sabbatical Jess Production Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    18 min
  4. 10/18/2023

    Asking For a Friend with Lolo Urbiztondo

    In this episode of the Open Late Podcast, Jess sits down with Lolo Urbiztondo, Jess's former partner and best friend. They share recent updates on their lives, with Lolo recounting her journey of falling in love with her current partner and the profound realization of being in love. Jess reflects on the transformative changes she's experiencing as she prepares for the arrival of her babies. The episode's second part revisits the classic "Asking for a Friend" style. Jess and Lolo offer thoughtful responses to questions from their listeners, covering a range of significant themes. They explore the importance of seeking and trying therapy, the value of understanding how to date oneself, and how self-discovery plays a pivotal role in determining one's desires in a relationship. Additionally, they delve into the significance of trusting oneself and evaluating the strength of a relationship.   In this episode of Open Late, Newest Life Updates Lolo's current love story Jess's reflections on impending motherhood Importance of dating yourself first  Building strong relationships and JOMO “Joy of Missing Out”   Connect with Lolo • Instagram: @lolo_urbiztondo   Connect with Jessica: • Instagram: @journey.with.jessica | @openlatethepodcast • Website: openlatepodcast.com  • YouTube: Open Late Podcast • What's my relationship style? Take the Open Late Quiz • Join our free chat community, "Open Talks" on WhatsApp • Open Late Dictionary 2:30 I saw him and there was this energetic pull I felt. – Lolo Urbiztondo   14:13 My kids will know that we had a former relationship. It's something I will never going to hide. – Jessica Esfandiary   15:13 We will remain open, we are not closing our relationship just because we are having kids. – Jessica Esfandiary   19:01 You are in the presence with your partner, and it's important to remember not to project your past and experiences that were traumatic on to your current relationship, because when you do that you make your partner wrong for the things that happened to you in the past. – Jessica Esfandiary    21:30 There are so many things to explore, and every different kink dynamic has a full spectrum. – Jessica Esfandiary   30:27 A good relationship with promise, or a partner that is showing up and its also doing the work, keeps me motivated. But if the other person isn’t engaging, the way that you are in this healthy way than I am unmotivated. – Jessica Esfandiary 31:54 I look at it as like when you are in partnership you are in this love temple together and you are both adding in love deposits. – Lolo Urbiztondo 36:05 For me dating myself hardcore was listening to the things I always wanted to do and checking them off my list. – Lolo Urbiztondo 40:32 When you can look at everything that happens to you, even if it really sucks and hurts, as like happening for you and not to you, you start to look at life as a gift - Jessica Esfandiary 43:34 A quality person is going to create safety in your relationship whether they are with someone else as a primary or not-Jessica Esfandiary 49:18 The crazy thing about non monogamy is that it's not about this new person. A lot of people think it is “oh I have such a great connection with this new person” but the truth is new person brings out a side of you that you love that you haven't experienced in awhile. – Jessica Esfandiary   50:00 We live in a society and a culture that is geared towards monogamy where people think that this is the norm and so it's really hard for people to break out the box. – Jessica Esfandiary Take advantage of a 30% discount on Dr. Zhana's eligible courses with code "JESSICA", applied to the first payment only for offers with multiple payments or subscriptions. •     Open Smarter Course The product I love who support this show: • Honey Pot Lube and Massage Oil OPENLATE20 • The Oh Club OPENLATE • Desire Resorts    This is a Sabbatical Jess Produc

    1h 5m
  5. 10/11/2023

    The Journey of Love Dependency With Drea Renee

    In this episode of the Open Late Podcast, Jess connects with Drea Renee, a close friend of Jessica's and an expert specializing in love and dependency. Sobriety takes the spotlight as they explore Drea's personal journey and her realization of a love addiction problem. They delve into the significance of S.L.A.A. (Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous) in addressing dependency issues within relationships. Drea shares insights into the support and tools provided by this program. As the conversation unfolds, they address the challenge of losing one's identity within a partnership, the innate longing for love, and the pursuit of authentic love acceptance. Non-monogamy becomes a thought-provoking subject, with discussions revolving around its potential impact on love addiction. Drea provides valuable guidance for those who suspect they might be struggling with partner addiction, and offer practical steps and insights to help individuals navigate these challenging emotions. In this Episode of Open Late: From sobriety to love addiction Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous  Understanding your addiction Challenges of losing one's identity in a relationship Consideration of non-monogamy's impact on love addiction Mentioned in the Episode: • Podcast: Your Partner is NOT your superhero • Podcast: How to Recognize Codependency in Your Relationship • SLAA quiz: The 40 Questions for Self-Diagnosis Connect with Drea Renee: • Instagram: @thedrearenee Connect with Jessica: • Instagram: @journey.with.jessica | @openlatethepodcast • Website: openlatepodcast.com  • YouTube: Open Late Podcast • What's my relationship style? Take the Open Late Quiz • Join our free chat community, "Open Talks" on WhatsApp • Open Late Dictionary 1:30 Love addiction it's like any other addiction, if you have an alcohol addiction, gambling, food, when that becomes all consuming, it becomes your entire life. - Drea Renee 3:08 When I got sober, its like with any addiction, it doesn't change your wiring. You just stop doing one thing and that laser focus goes to something else. - Drea Renee 5:21 I wanted to be with him so badly that I was like “I'm just going to be a part of you”. Whatever you want me to be, I'll be, so I can get you to love me. - Drea Renee 6:44 My parents divorced when I was seven and my mum had me really, really young. So it's like kids growing up with kids, not really knowing how to emotionally evolve and other things the proper way. - Drea Renee 7:54 Awareness is one thing,but you must put into practice completely new ways of being. - Jessica Esfandiary 13:07 You're addicted to the chemistry in your body. That adrenaline, dopamine. Everything that happens when you're in fight or flight, when you feel like you have the thing that you want. And if you don't have the thing that you want, you're going to die. - Jessica Esfandiary 17:00 Sometimes I wish you could just get somebody a flashcard. Like these are my strengths, these are my weaknesses. Just take a look. And if you don't want to, give it back. - Drea Renee 18:30 The relationship that you have for the first two years is something entirely different, it is its own beast. And you will never have it again. - Jessica Esfandiary 20:17 In some ways with like dating apps, everything is so deliverable and so fast that it makes it challenging to take your time. - Jessica Esfandiary 23:49 Your partner is not your superhero. - Jessica Esfandiary 31:49 Being in a room with a lot of other people that are going through the same thing was so helpful. - Drea Renee Take advantage of a 30% discount on Dr. Zhana's eligible courses with code "JESSICA", applied to the first payment only for offers with multiple payments or subscriptions. • Open Smarter Course The product I love who support this show: • Honey Pot Lube and Massage Oil OPENLATE20 • The Oh Club OPENLATE • Desire Resorts  This is a Sabbatical Jess Production Learn more about your ad choices. Visit me

    36 min
  6. 10/06/2023

    From M*sturbation to Mindfulness

    In this Bonus episode of the Open Late Podcast, Jess continues her conversation with Robbie Garippo, a close friend of Jessica and Pasha. This episode delves into an intriguing array of topics that touch upon the intricacies of human intimacy and connection. First, they embark on a candid discussion about the frequency of masturbation, seeking to strike a balance that fosters both physical well-being and emotional health. Then they take a deeper turn into the multifaceted world of orgasms and explore the fascinating interplay between the mind and body in the experience of these intense moments of pleasure and release. In this Episode of Open Late: Healthy frequency of masturbating Orgasms through the brain and body Biological Life force Starting a book club Mentioned in the Episode: • Book: The Way of the Superior Man by David Deida Connect with Robbie Garippo: • Instagram: @robbefrancesco Connect with Jessica: • Instagram: @journey.with.jessica | @openlatethepodcast • Website: openlatepodcast.com  • YouTube: Open Late Podcast • What's my relationship style? Take the Open Late Quiz • Join our free chat community, "Open Talks" on WhatsApp • Open Late Dictionary 1:36 To have orgasms through the brain and body actually lead to a greater, more fulfilling, passionate relationship with your lover in the world. - Robbie Garippo 2:30 Essentially for men when you ejaculate you're basically giving in to your lower level passions. - Robbie Garippo 3:10 When you give in to those primal instincts so easily. It kind of echoes how you are, how you'll be in your life, in relationships. - Robbie Garippo 5:15 There's a buildup of tension in the release of tension. And so if you can take that tension instead of just releasing it, take it really high and circulate it, then you really start to tap into a true power. - Robbie Garippo 6:00 People resist high amounts of pleasure. - Jessica Esfandiary Take advantage of a 30% discount on Dr. Zhana's eligible courses with code "JESSICA", applied to the first payment only for offers with multiple payments or subscriptions. • Open Smarter Course The product I love who support this show: • Honey Pot Lube and Massage Oil OPENLATE20 • The Oh Club OPENLATE • Desire Resorts  This is a Sabbatical Jess Production Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    11 min
  7. 10/04/2023

    Awakening Masculine Energy with Robbie Garippo

    In this episode of the Open Late Podcast, Jess sits down with Robbie Garippo, a close friend of Jessica and Pasha, who has been part of their team and family for many years. They touch on the significance of therapy and how it has played a vital role in their lives. Robbie opens up about a hard breakup he endured, shedding light on the transformative impact it had on his personal growth. They delve into the realm of traumatic childhood experiences, exploring the complexities of giving and receiving love. They explore the dynamics of relationships, drawing a distinction between short-term casual encounters and long-term committed partnerships. They also talk about the concept of masculine and feminine energies within our bodies, as they reflect on the importance of understanding and balancing these aspects of ourselves. In this Episode of Open Late: The importance of therapy A transformative experience after a challenging breakup Unhealthy relationship with receiving love  Exploring masculine and feminine body energies An attractive and safe way to take charge Mentioned in the Episode: • Book: The Way of the Superior Man by David Deida Connect with Robbie Garippo: • Instagram: @robbefrancesco Connect with Jessica: • Instagram: @journey.with.jessica | @openlatethepodcast • Website: openlatepodcast.com  • YouTube: Open Late Podcast • What's my relationship style? Take the Open Late Quiz • Join our free chat community, "Open Talks" on WhatsApp • Open Late Dictionary 2:51 I'm a guy that wants the most out of life. Just wants to be happy, constantly working on myself. I'm a work in progress. - Robbie Garippo 6:05 Going through a breakup really made me look inward. I had no idea issues with my father, issues with my mother, and which was leading to issues in my every relationship in my life. - Robbie Garippo 10:07 Our bodies truly store anything that happens to you that is traumatic or that is unsettling, especially as a child, because you don't really have the proper tools to deal with it, or you've been taught that you can't express emotion. - Jessica Esfandiary 14:49 There's only so much that the body can also relearn or integrate in that moment. The brain needs time the same way that like as people, we can be active or resting and we actually need both and the rest is just as valuable because it's the integration. - Jessica Esfandiary 19:42 I can't really truly give my gift to my woman or the world unless I'm really standing in my divine masculinity. - Robbie Garippo 25:23 I'm finding it very empowering to myself because I'm stepping into these relationships fully, authentically me and unapologetically me and not like thinking about them, but I'm really thinking about me. And I've never done that before - Robbie Garippo 26:42 All have masculine and feminine inside of us and we can all play to those different energies, like I can embody a lot of my masculine side. - Jessica Esfandiary 27:28 Desire and chemistry is really the tension between polarity and like sameness. - Jessica Esfandiary 46:51 When you're frustrated, you get taken out of a very aligned, calm state and you get into an activated state where you are not your best self. And when we're speaking from that place, we're not speaking in an open hearted and clear way. We're speaking from hurt. -Jessica Esfandiary Take advantage of a 30% discount on Dr. Zhana's eligible courses with code "JESSICA", applied to the first payment only for offers with multiple payments or subscriptions. • Open Smarter Course The product I love who support this show: • Honey Pot Lube and Massage Oil OPENLATE20 • The Oh Club OPENLATE • Desire Resorts  This is a Sabbatical Jess Production Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    52 min
4.8
out of 5
256 Ratings

About

Welcome to Open Late, a deep dive into all kinds of relationships. Let’s explore the multi-faceted, frequently misunderstood, dynamics of polyamory and being “open” even means.  Weekly on this podcast, you’ll hear about my personal journey with Opening Up, and uncovering the deep and intricate layers of our hearts as expressed in the ways we love others and ourselves.     If you’re interested in relationships as a container for growth and deeper knowing of your truest self you’re in the right place. If you’re interested in adding more spice and sexiness to your life you’re also in the right place. Each episode we’ll share candid real-life experiences (and or stories), knowledge and tools to support you in creating your own relationship magic.   Open Late is for anyone who wants to explore with respect, curiosity, and deepen their self-awareness in order to create a conscious relationship whether you’re monogamous, ish, poly or dating everyone.

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